makingshehulk

[makingshehulk]

We will have a few about my mom and wedding

I am coming up to my one year anniversary. I got married in Vegas in a place I hated because I truly cannot stand that city. We wanted to get married outdoors at a campsite I used to go to when I was a venture scout. Or we wanted to be on the beach where I used to go as a child. My mom was livid that the first thing on my mind was just eloping and going to church a year later, feeling that I may have just earned our celebration. So to make her happy we were getting everything set up. I had my childhood priest ready to go, an entire camp and industrial mess hall as well as a guy who made tacos (my husband's favorite food) available and ready and all half paid for. The first thing that crossed her mind was the dress. I needed a huge dress (IDK why because I don't feel like I want to look like a giant comforter) So I got a simple dress and then an over-skirt. Not enough, it was too plain. I honestly didn't like my dress at all because everything was so rushed I made the decision the way I had to. The dress was beautiful but none of it was what I wanted, then during the time of actually planning she made sure to get the napkins she wanted the decor she liked and then we fought tooth and nail on the flowers, she hated them. But my ENTIRE budget was blown on flowers, it broke my heart because I didn't like them either. Looking back I realize I made a lot of ugly decisions to feel in control somewhere and I didnt like most of it. Again, my soul just hurts; it was the only day I could get my brother and sister in law and all of my nieces in one spot. I missed them so much. But finding out that my brother would have gone anywhere to be at our wedding made me hate my day so much more because my mom fed me lies saying he wouldn't ever show up to a camp because he hated scouts so much. She also told me that my sister in law absolutely cannot stand me for no reason. She tried to have me and my husband become friends with people and men that would make a pass at me in front of my husband with no regard as to how wrong that is. Making me book rooms at a hotel that we couldn't afford if people didn't stay in the hotel and then turning around and booking rooms in her timeshare.

But now that I know everything and I spoke to my husband about what happened and how much my mom lied, he and I almost annulled our marriage just to go back to how things were and start fresh, The way we wanted to do it, even get proposed to. We will not being doing that, but he said "let's redo our wedding pictures with the red wood trees" I am lucky to have him. And I know I will be posting these pictures and I look forward to and don't look forward to my mother's fits about it. I know he is excited about this too. Now everyone in my family keeps telling my mom not to ask me about the wedding only because I will tell her how I really feel. and I don't think she will forgive my opinions

[makingshehulk]

Been some time (sorry)

Been a while and have gone through way too much to explain... Im married first off lol I am very happy to say. I will be more attentive to my post because a lot has happened, if anyone even reads these I hope you enjoy

[makingshehulk]

A downside of going to the gym with your fiancé

Can you call me crazy if going to the gym with my fiancé is amazing and hurts all at the same time?seriously? I love pushing weights I’ve learned I enjoy being strong and the burn comes after working out it’s probably one of my favorite feelings. But man is it hard being a big girl around exceptionally looking man that’s going to be my husband, he’s so beautiful inside and out. And then when I see these women at the gym that are just beyond gorgeous I question why he’s with me all the time and I know he stares because he would be stupid not to. So I close my eyes and I push the weights harder. Going heavier and heavier making men become intimidated. Adding my fiancé to that list. I’m not quite sure how to move about this how to accept this... I know he loves me, and I love him so much but how on earth does any one keep their confidence in this situation? Can anyone hear me?

[makingshehulk]

Motherhood and diet

So, something I’ve come to learn about dating as of right now 80% of losing weight I don’t care what anybody tells me the hardest part of it all is the dieting.... the worst part is being a busy working mom and making the time to diet. After I have cleaned and prepared everything for my family then cleaned that up and gotten myself ready for work the person I always forget to feed is myself. Now, don’t take this as any sign of regret of motherhood. I just wish there was another hour in the day to allow for myself and regardless if that happened I still would dedicate it to my family. I don’t know if I’m doing this right but some days I question how some of these moms just look amazing and have time for the gym and have time for they’re family. I can’t keep up some days.... anyone else relate?

[makingshehulk]

Changes in me

So as I’m moving more and losing my weight.... I’ve learned something insane that was laughable at one point for me. Im addicted to sugar.... reading on it I also learned that sugar will make the same reactions in the brain as cocaine. Anyone else know this? I’m amazed! Anyone listening to this? Hello?

[makingshehulk]

My changes so far

[makingshehulk]

Okay, here’s my first one (gulp)

I love she hulk, she is underrated and intimidating and attractive and she knows it most of the time. I want to be like her. I hope I can be... You see I am engaged to an amazing man who has integrity and l feel privileged to know he wants to marry me. I am over weight, he is VERY fit.... He works out a lot and takes me with him. At his request he wants me to get healthier, not thinner. I told him that I aspire to be she hulk his response “challenge accepted” so here I am... One day at a time with one rep at a time I fight for my health to become the woman I have always dreamed of being. Wish me luck and send advice the more the better and I will update as often as possible