marssinist

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occasionally I am struck dumb by the sublime beauty of the world in the small moments, you know?

egg

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I understand some of you are 19 but that is not an old man, he's 32.

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Imagine Sanji gets onto Hell's Kitchen. He's great, he's good. There's just one problem; Gordon Ramsay fucking hates him.

19 year old chain-smoker whose rep sheet only has waiter and sous chef written down. He looks like a troublemaker. Is in fact a jerk (to men). Sanji and Gordon Ramsay's first interaction? Sanji being incredibly disrespectful and undermining him on his own show.

"Insult my cooking and I'll insult your face with my foot next."

"Where's the lamb sauce? Well have you checked your asshole by chance?"

"Yes, bastard chef. I understand, bastard chef. No I won't stop calling you a bastard chef, bastard chef."

"I'm French, asshole, I have a biological obligation to hate the English."

"If you call me donkey one more fucking time, I'm shoving this entire chicken up your asshole and pouring red wine and lemon down your throat for the marinade."

When asked if he even likes Gordon Ramsay or wanted to be on this show: "Yeah he's my idol. Great guy, great cook. My second biggest inspiration. Love that guy. It's an honor to be insulted by him. Could never be homesick as long as he keeps the verbal abuse coming."

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I hate the "life's not fair" kind of fuckers. Like yeah no shit but in this current moment that is up to you?? You have the power to control the choices of one single human person in this universe, and this is the one you're making? Are you proud of your contribution to the world? Of course the grand tapestry of life is not without its faults and flaws, but right now you're choosing to be one of them.

[marssinist]

Spin the wheel. That's who's trying to kill you.

Spin the wheel again. That’s who’s trying to protect you.

(If you have zero idea about the name you got, spin until you see someone you recognize.)

(Six months ago, I did a version of this poll with about five hundred options on the spinner wheel. For this one, I more than doubled it.)

[marssinist]

tonight i swore a blood oath to the minimum wage workers at my local subway

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Thank you Derek, menswear guide, for reminding me why paying more to be free advertising for brands is dumb.

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i bet origami feels good as fuck if you're a piece of paper

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Some names just sound so ridiculously fake that had they been fictional, people would’ve rolled their eyes in complete disbelief. Like seriously. Wdym there’s a mf called Galileo Galilei. Stfu. You just made that up

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I like how the homestuck pilot stuff is just giving everyone a rude awakening that a lot of indie creators know each other and respect each others work and that your individual cringe does not exist in a vacuum. And that at the end of the day you’re all clowns.

[marssinist]

hey can you guys keep an eye on my red explosive barrels while i go take a nap

do NOT smoke weed beside them

[marssinist]

[marssinist]

Today's high schoolers romanticizing 2016 as if there weren't the clown incidents

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Meme decor

..

My eyes are open 👐