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Everyone with a Patagonia Pro-Deal… Raise Your Hand!

…What are the chances that most people raising their hands are White? What are the chances that most people raising their hands are male identifying?

Being outside has often been the space that makes me feel the most alive and the most like myself. For me, being in nature keeps me grounded, as the vastness of the mountains remind me that I’m merely a little speck in the beauty and wonderment of the universe. But I also feel exceedingly aware of my race, gender, class and sexual orientation. I am a Black, female identifying, queer American. And if you know anything about outdoor culture and American history, my intersectionality can come with a complex dialogue.

I’ve been fortunate enough to turn my passion for the outdoors and social justice work into a profession. Once working as a Wilderness Therapy Trip Leader to an Inclusion and Identity Coordinator I’ve had the opportunity to talk about why outdoor culture is, frankly, filled with white cis men and why that is a problem.

“I thought this was about Patagonia?”

It is. Stay with me!

For me, a large part of working in the outdoor industry has always been about the gear I’m bringing with me! Is it comfortable, durable, light weight, etc? Many might not know, but could guess that a discounted pricing program (known as pro-deals) exists for people who work in the outdoor industry. From a marketing stand point… this makes sense. Also, many outdoor professionals aren’t paid extremely well, so the small discount helps keep them outfitted while they are doing what they love to do!

Over the years these programs have helped me greatly and the companies seem happy to do it! As a Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion (DEI) outdoor educator, I again qualify for most pro-deal programs… except one apparently. Patagonia. Having been a loyal Patagonia customer I can completely understand the high prices of their gear/clothing. It’s some of the best out there, truly! So, as I went to apply for their pro-program thinking I clearly qualify… I was asked for more information. I gave all that information but then was told after they read an article written about my DEI work (clearly seeing my photo) they said I’m a temporary employee so they couldn’t honor the deal. “But my contract has been extended and I still work here actually” I emailed with a copy of that contract. I get another email. They only offer this discount to “… the directors of accredited university outdoor education programs that offer students specific degrees in outdoor leadership, who also teach accredited university courses”. Well, if that isn’t the most specific thing I’ve ever heard.

You see I’m really struggling to believe that is the truth. And how do you call it out without making it bad for everyone? I know about 20 people personally who would lose their pro-deal with Patagonia because they do not meet these requirements. But you know what the kicker of it all is… I was denied the pro-deal BUT was directed to the web specials section of the website. OUCH! Did the pro-program rep mean to insult me? Probably not. But damn if it’s not triggering as a Black American to hear, “sales rack is in the back. Where you can afford things.” I’m going to give Patagonia the benefit of the doubt with that language, but what I cannot do is pretend that Directors of accredited university outdoor ed programs are the only people who deserve a discount (if that is even true). How many of those programs even exist? And who runs them? Brown queer people? Probably not. Who does Patagonia value? I mean looking at their Instagram account it seems obvious who they like wearing their gear. And hey, they get all the credit for the environmental work they do. That doesn’t let them off the hook though. I know a lot of Brown and Black outdoor professionals who wear and love their gear. Do you feel represented and seen by Patagonia?

Ok, I know it might sound petty. But why do I feel so offended? Why do I feel like they really don’t care about me. I’ve been a loyal customer (paying full price) for over 10 years. Looking around as I write this I see 3 out of 5 of my things sitting next to me that say Patagonia.

Keep your discount. But do better.

(Also, if you're interested “The Patagonia Pro Program is a membership program for qualified outdoor professionals, environmental grant recipients, and outdoor industry partners.")

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Am I Talking About Race Too Much?

Am I the only one who feels consumed with race issues all the damn time? Is it because I’m brown that I’m overly aware? My friends are predominately White and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t see their eyes glaze over a little when I again mention that I’m the only “Black” or “Brown” person in whatever establishment we are in. Am I being annoying? I mean, it’s probably true, I probably am the only brown person, but did I just ruin their experience making them aware of the differences instead of shutting the fuck up and embracing my hangover like everyone else? 

In my defense my most recent job consists of continually questioning the “institution” and how racism, classism, sexism, and all the other shitty hateful -isms and prejudices are woven into the threads of our American Narrative. Working in higher education reminds me of the contradiction of sending 18 yr olds off to explore themselves and then reminding them they have no real say in a system engrained in White Supremacy and a rigid Gender Binary. I push them to ignite change and stir the “melting pot” and they say, “I’m tired.” Yeah, I’m tired too, Chad! I get it! How many pioneers do we need? 

I talk to the students about embracing difficult conversations and practicing patience. Even though my insides are screaming like Laurence Fishburne in School Daze to ‘WAKE UP’! The internal battle of the poor little brown person, huh? 

[Can I put code switching on my resume?]

By 2042 Whites will be the minority (”You had a good run!”). Latinx folks will be the majority. And the “Whitopia” communities that Dr. Rich Benjamin talks about will be where?? Does anyone else feel the “separate but equal” trend coming back?! Will my white friends start to understand how uncomfortable I feel most of the time? (White friends, I love you, don’t take this personal, you all do a decent job).

Ok, ok there is some good shit happening! However, for the 10 steps forward “we” take, I then have to turn on the news and watch poor Brett Kava-jack-off show his White man, boo-hoo frat boy entitled AF anger... Cool, bro! We all knew ‘Brett’ in college by the way, awkward until he was drunk, and then loud and obnoxious. “Dude, did Brett puke under the bathroom sink again and cover it with newspaper?” Hm. I DIGRESS! 

Ok, maybe I’m talking about it too much. Or maybe it doesn’t matter. Ignore it, right? Who cares what other people think right? 

I do though. 

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Guthrie.

Got Guthrie on a Sunday. He’s perfect.

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Believe in what you want to believe. Vote for who you want to vote for. I don't care. BUT whatever political party you belong to you have to admit grabbing a beer and bite to eat with the Obama's would be a good time.

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Buddy Holly

Buddy Holly died 53 years ago on Friday. I was in Last Vestige Music Shop and I came across a slew of Holly's albums. I realized I didn't know too much about the guy... I went home and did some research. Buddy Holly was said to be, "the single most influential creative force in early rock and roll." Well I feel sheepish! What a shit. For someone who enjoys music as much as I do I feel ashamed I don't have any of his albums in my collection. Anyway... I just thought I would give good old Bud and shout out.

Cheers!

Song of the Day!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GMezwtB1oCU

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Cause if you're dreaming about dying, then you're not really living darling You've gotta be starving, you've gotta be starving for it And if you're crying by the moon, in the sun you better lift up that chin

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I think we have to own the fears that we have of each other, and then, in some practical way, some daily way, figure out how to see people differently than the way we were brought up to.

Alice Walker

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Word of the Day

Insubordinate - adj.

-disobedient to authority

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Song of the Day.

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If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him march to the tune that he hears, however measured, or far away.

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It's so easy, To think about Love, To Talk about Love, To wish for Love, But it's not always easy, To recognize Love, Even when we hold it.... In our hands.

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"One day I will find the right words, and they will be simple."

 Jack Kerouac (The Dharma Bums)

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Emotions are amiss...

"...It is our emotions that are amiss. We are freaks, the world is fine, and let us all go have lobotomies to restore us to a natural state. We can leave the library then, go back to the creek lobotomized, and live on its banks as untroubled as any muskrat or reed. You first."

Perhaps there are two types of people. Those who embrace emotion and look forward to an aching heart quite frequently (although this is probably not suggested for a "healthy" life, it is necessary for some type of progress)... and those who simply do not. Because I am not the second of these two I have a hard time understanding those who do not choose to feel the push of life... Or perhaps my anxiety and manic emotions don't allow me to realize that everyone else is okay and lack of emotion is completely normal and I am the crazy one (this is very likely ha).

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William Faulkner said that he lived his life as if looking through the rear window of a fast-moving automobile, and I can say that with regard to many experiences and much of my life, I feel the same. Perhaps it's the pervasive Nordic pessimism that disaster is eternally imminent, or perhaps it's simply an isolated but sufficiently-periodic idiosyncrasy, that keeps me from turning too often my mind's eye forward. Whatever the origin, I think it is not recommendable as protocol for a joyous life.

:)

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"im just as lost as when i started... but thats neither here nor there."

Change.

I'm sure we all have a definition for this word... I think this word can mean so many different things (depending on who you are and what you've seen and experienced). If you have traveled outside of your country than you have experienced growth and change that helps you look inside yourself... makes you ask yourself what you want out of life-because there is something to seeing different cultures that helps us realize how similar we all truly are. If you have lost someone dear to your heart than you have experienced change. If this person has passed away that change and growth are different than if you ended a relationship and feel heartbreak. How about being that person that stays behind while their lover embarks on an epic journey... this change is all too familiar to my personal story. We change everyday... we learn new ideas, mantras, and equations... we cry, laugh, ache, and realize. We hear songs that seep into the deepest darkest corners of our souls that give us a physical reaction. We get a smile from a beautiful person that makes our entire day perfect. We find awareness and understanding of how significant the simple things are. We eat extravagant meals with wonderful people. We debate. We embrace. We push... pull... and drowned. We find depression and sometimes live in it... we find love and sometimes live in it... we find space and sometimes... live in it. Human beings are incredible but we have stopped giving each other enough credit... because once we nail down that thing that makes the most sense to us... we change... and most times we get angry instead of embracing it... being in it.

Someone dear to me told me that change is constant... it will even happen if we aren't paying attention. We can either acknowledge it or ignore it until it builds and builds and builds and smothers us.

I want to end with some things a friend told me this morning through a wonderful chat.

"yet, is it change or a exploration of becoming someone else.. or trying to be someone you may not be... i think that travelling and self discovery will only change what you allow it to... i think it really comes down to character, sub consciousness, and desires... which may facilitate the changes or not...however, change can be good.. more of a positive "growth" rather then associating with negative connotations.. which many do ...i think that _____ will explore and grow and if she is sure of her wants... then she will return.. who knows.. you may go trough growth periods while shes gone as well..."

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SF's best weather months!

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We are afraid to care to much, for fear that the other person does not care at all.