min-arya

[min-arya]

to my filo audience!! support this writer 💗💗

entry 01 - 230506

addressed to you

Hey there, my solace.

I'm really grateful for the conversation we had last night. I feel a lot better now. I feel like I am finally ready to move on and be genuinely happy for you, because I wasn't able to do that. I don't even know why, but I couldn't bring myself to be happy for you because although you have given me everything you could give that time, I still felt like you were depriving me of something; a closure. I couldn't do that before. I held a grudge. It felt like it was so sudden and rushed. I didn't like how it ended. I feel like I was still hanging in midair when you raised me up so high and mighty; and when you decided to end it, I couldn't get back down safely.

It took me what felt like almost half a year to finally realize that the only one who could get me down safely is the one who put me high in the first place. It sucks seeing how dependent I am towards you even without being part of each other's life. It's weird.

Now that we've had what I could say was the most awaited conversation, I feel like I'm ready to move on. If we ever become friends again during research, go. If we ever become classmates again, go. If we ever meet in upd, go.  Whatever it is that the circumstances decide for us, go. If anything, I actually want you back in my life as whatever, but that's not happening anytime soon because I don't think I can, so I'm gonna leave it to fate and the universe.

'Til the next time, friend. Do great things okay?  

- weeyuh

That day, May 6th, was the scheduled date for the release of my test permit for UPCAT; the most popular college entrance exam in my country. UP or University of the Philippines is like the biggest and the most prestigious state university in my country with, I think, second quality education next to ADMU. Which is why applicants this year reached over 100,000 countrywide. 

Personally, UP wasn't on my list. I was actually aiming for Ateneo or Letran, but since this year was the schedule of UPCAT for my batch, I also took the chance 'cause why not? My best friend, Sofia Anne, was actually the one who persuaded me. Probably because UP is her dream university.  If I remember it correctly, she has been working on her academic performance to pursue the Doctor of Veterinary Medicine program in UP ever since. She told me that I should try and take the opportunity, and so I did. I submitted my Form 1 on the official website of the UP admissions and finally got my schedule for the test permit. May 6th. 

The two days before that were actually interesting. I remember crying on the night of May 4th because I was reminded of that conversation we had about pasta. You learned that I don't eat carbonara, and so you kind of crossed that out of the list of dishes you said you were going to cook for me. I was crying that night because I finally changed my mind about carbonara. I like it now and regardless, I won't get to taste your recipe. I was sad because it felt like I was changing, turning into someone you don't know anymore. That change kind of scared me because from strangers with memories, we'd just be only strangers when that happens. 

Weeks before that night, I was relapsing countless times. I couldn't stop myself from crying and hurting about the thought of you still caring about me when I have over-villainized you post-breakup. I learned through Sean that you miss our circle of friends, and that you have accepted whatever it is that I'll put you through. You understood that you've hurt me and validated me. That thought bothered me because I wasn't expecting that kind of reaction, but knowing you, it makes sense. I pitied myself during those relapses and made a deal with myself that if I ever relapse again, I will finally approach you for closure. I did.

I messaged you 6 paragraphs of all of my questions, pain, anger, confusion, and whatever else included on May 5th at 3 in the morning. Then, I slept. I woke up at 7am that morning. I only had 4 hours of sleep, but it felt like enough. I checked my phone and saw that you've sent your reply. I clicked on it and although my eyes weren't fully awake, I was able to comprehend what you said. You said you were sorry. You explained it really well how you really didn't mean to hurt me, how you admitted that you were selfish and insensitive that time, and how those gestures you did were with pure love and intention and not a cover-up or a compensation of what you were about to do. I cried. I cried at the thought of you loving me truly. It hurt me more how we couldn't be together because of your sexual preference and made me angry at the universe for letting this happen. All in all, I guess at least I experienced my happiest and my most loved moments with you.

After that day, it was finally the release of my test permit. At that point, I've re-read your message almost ten times already. I was making sure I was comprehending it correctly; I was, thankfully. I finally accepted it. I have finally accepted what the circumstances decide for us because I remember you saying you want to pursue Chemical Engineering in UP and if I'm not mistaken, that program is available in Diliman Campus. It occurred to me that there might be a possibility that we'd meet there in UPD because that campus offers my dream program which is Psychology. And if that's what fate plans for us, go. 

I was facing the day like the new version of myself. I saw the journey to UPD as an opportunity to change my perspective and finally heal; 'soul cleansing'. It was like my vacation in Boracay back in 2022 where I went through new experiences that old me wouldn't be able to survive. I don't know why but roaming around unfamiliar yet safe places gives me clarity. And since I'm not yet familiar with commuting from Pacita to Quezon City, I was able to convince Pia to accompany me.  

The bus trip from Pacita to Taft took about 30-45 mins. It was like an accidental catch-up with Pia because we were both busy with me on research and her on both research and review center. I remember her telling something about how chaotic her day was with our other friends when it was their turn to claim their test permit in UPD. They then went straight to MOA and tried the extreme rides there. I could see that they really enjoyed the day because when she was telling me about it, she was talking in high pitch and at a pace that you'd need multiple breaths. It was fun. They had fun and I could see that. 

"'Yung closure lang 'yung interesting na nangyari sakin kahapon eh," I told her when she paused her story because we were about to get on the train. As soon as I uttered those words, I could already tell that she was interested. She has been the goat, the witness of my ups and downs including that relationship with you. She witnessed every cry, every 'ang sakit', every 'miss ko na s'ya'  , every 'bakit kasi ganun?' from me. She knew how important this was for me.  

"Mamaya mo ikwento sa picnic para sulit," she said as the train stopped in front of us. We boarded. We took LRT1, MRT, and LRT2 'til we reached the jeep terminal that goes straight inside the heart of UPD.  

During our jeepney ride, a thought came to me and told Pia about it. "Siguro, kung 'di kami natapos, kaming tatlo ni Marco at Jat magkasama ngayon. I prolly wouldn't be here with you," I said. I mentioned your best friend because I got the knowledge that we have the same schedule. The thought of us going to UPD together just randomly popped into my head. The closure was still fresh, that's why my mind just wandered off on the thought of you.  

After a few minutes, we finally reached the admissions building of UPD. This was it—the reason behind my journey to UPD, Quezon City—the UP office of admissions. I went to the queue that led to the inside of the building. Pia left me alone and headed for the waiting area since companies weren't allowed inside. I was honestly impressed by the process because it was well-organized in a circular manner. I went into the backside of the building, and got out in front. It was also an easy and quick process. I didn't wait too long for my permit. After a few minutes, my name got called, and I was able to claim my permit that fast. 

 Once I exited the building, I was looking around for Pia. I wasn't able to understand her when she told me where she was going to stay to wait for me. So I looked around in search of a tall skinny wolf cut-haired woman with glasses. I was kind of panicking that I didn't see her anywhere, so I checked my phone and tried to contact her. I forgot to take notice of the poor signal there in UPD, so I put down my phone and once again looked around. What I wasn't expecting to find was you. 

There you were, I found you. I found you, Rian, and Jat. You were exactly in the situation I told Pia in our jeepney ride. I actually couldn't believe this happened.  You pointed at me. Why the heck would you point at me? Jat, then, took notice of my presence. You three all waved at me. I waved back embarrassingly. Fuck, I need to get out of here. Pia, nasaan ka na ba? I thought when I immediately panged my attention to my phone after our tiny exchange. When I looked up at your direction, I saw you whispering to yourselves and began to walk closer. FUUUCKKK!!! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?! STAY BACK!! My mind started going into frantic mode. I didn't know how to fucking act. We just talked last night—LAST NIGHT! I still have to work on myself. I still have to be okay with whatever it is that will get us to interact someday. I still have to accept what's now and change my whole perspective on us. Fuck, I wasn't ready to face you after the conversation we had last night. Fuck!!! When you all started getting closer, I began to walk as well. 

I headed for the start of the queue in hopes of the sight of Pia. Then, I was approached by kids who were looking for the owner of the lost flask they found. I told them I didn't know and I didn't lose one. If I did, they sure weren't the right guys who found it because the flask they were holding was yellowish gold in color while mine was dark blue with stickers all over it. When they started to head for the direction I was facing to ask another soon-to-be upcat taker, Pia called out my name.

I was so fucking relieved that I heard her voice. I turned around and headed towards her direction. Then to my hyperbolic horror, I saw you three again walking towards my direction. Oh my effing gosh! There really isn't a way to avoid you, is there? I bowed my head down when y'all were getting close. When we got to a really close proximity, only Jat waved at me once again and exchanged a 'hi' with me.

After that exchange, I immediately ran to Pia. "Gagi, andito sina Marco. Nakita mo ba?" I informed her. She told me no, and asked about what happened. I told her about the whole interaction, what I felt, and what I thought about it in consideration of the random what-if scenario I told her about during our jeepney ride. What the fuck just happened? 

We then headed to the picnic spot she was telling me about. I then prepared the mantel and lunch I brought. We had our Saturday classes there. Although there are a lot of things I could focus on that day, my mind kept bringing me back to what happened earlier—you. I spent my whole afternoon thinking why it happened, what its purpose was, & what lesson was it trying to teach me. I couldn't stop myself telling Pia every single little thought that popped into my head related to that interaction that day.

I couldn't believe that my tweet came true that if we ever meet in upd, I'll let it happen. Oh my gosh though, why must it happen so fast? I'm still so confused. Destiny is a funny thing and that day, it felt like I was the butt of its joke. 

I think that's all you need to know about what had happened to me that day. I'm curious about yours too, but don't tell me about it. I don't need to know. 

[min-arya]

[min-arya]

“Oh my god you’re a writer? Can I read your stuff?”

[min-arya]

jay with a short gf ↷♡

requested <3 ! jake ver ! hoon ver ! riki ver !

PAIRING ! jay x f!reader

WC ! 1.4k

GENRE ! fluff, crack, slight suggestive

a/n: sobbing this was so cute and fun to write, ty for the req anonnie <3

if you told jay you were insecure about your height.. oh boy

he’d literally go straight from 😊to 😨😾

ITS ONE OF HIS FAVORITE THINGS ABOUT YOU >:(

you’re just so !! small !! he wants to shove you in his pocket and protect you from the world !!!

you’re lucky because jay is not one to tease often

he’s actually just. blunt and completely honest with what he’s thinking at all times

due to your short height you can’t reach a lot of things in the kitchen :(

so when he sees you standing on top of the counter to grab something off the shelf, he just goes, “aww”

you whip your head around and there he is. just 🧌 in the doorway

so being the gentle soul you are you give him the middle finger ❤️ *eye twitch*

but the truth is he wasn’t even teasing you!!

he genuinely thought you looked adorable :(

you could pick up a twig off the ground and he’d go ‘☺️☺️ that’s my y/n’ like a literal dad

AND AND due to your height n’ size difference jay’s clothes just OVERFLOW on you

you’ll walk in like, “bub?”

he looks up from his phone all tired and— AHHHHSJHDND Y/N’S WEARING MY SHIRT look how cute she is!!!! *heart accelerates eyes soften jaw dropped*

he grows the most fond smile imaginable as he murmurs out a ‘yes angel’ :(((((

but he won’t lie the shirt goes down to your knees so it looks like you have no pants on

he giggles a bit BUT AGAIN jay does not tease you much so he stays quiet <3

even if you were taller than him, this man would still find ways to baby you

but since you’re a great deal smaller than him, his instinct grows even stronger

when it’s cold out???? suddenly you’re a first grader who can’t even zip up their own coat

“ok y/n where’s your gloves? no not those cheap ones, i mean the big puffy grey ones with the velcro straps, your hands are so tiny we have to— OH, AND WE CAN’T FORGET YOUR HAT. seriously, i heard you can get sick from having your ears exposed to the cold for too long—“

you’re just like 🧍‍♀️”love, i don't think my ears temperature will affect my health”

he silences you by further tightening his giant black scarf around your neck and chin

this goes for warm weather too of course, not just cold 🙁

“hmm, i don’t trust this sunscreen brand, y/n. since you’re so small, it shouldn’t be too hard to find a hat that can cover your entire body, right?”

“hey! i’m not that small!”

it’s too late

instead of a hat though, your boyfriend’s brought you a whole umbrella to carry around, declaring that the sun will NOT be burning you today!!

secretly, you have to admit you love being taken care of by him :)

one reason you find yourself getting annoyed by your height though, is when you have to literally stand on your tippy toes just to give jay a kiss :c

yeah, instead of seeing his handsome face when you look in his direction, all you get is his shoulder 🙁

every time you want a kiss while he’s standing, you have to beg him to stay still and bend his neck down so he can meet you halfway

sometimes he can’t help but chuckle a little at your efforts just to reach him

which makes you pout of course, “it’s not my fault you’re as tall as the BFG 😾”

“eh? i’m average height y/n”

“not for me you asshole”

bro laughs at you again 😞

he thinks you look like one of those little demon chihuahuas when you’re mad

(but he’d never tell you that cuz he’s scared you’ll beat him up with those tiny knuckles of yours 🏃)

sometimes jay gets a little uncomfy looking down all the time and complains about his neck hurting

so, if an innocent kiss turns into something steamier he will instead scoop you up and bring you somewhere where you won’t have to stand on your tippy toes the whole time and his neck won’t feel like it’s about to fall off ❤️

either that, or he gets impatient and just lifts you by your thighs to hold you against a wall/kitchen counter (muscle pig 😒)

but you’re just like “babe why are we doing this against the wall, can we go to like. the couch or something”

suddenly he’s pouting with his swollen ass lips (you’re proud to say that’s your doing <3) “but i wanted to show off my muscles :c”

since you’re a softie for pouty jay you let him do what he wants with you

speaking of his muscles you think it’s fun to tag along on jay’s gym expeditions

sunghoon and niki are usually there too !! gym bros !!

it’s fun watching until they ask YOU to join

“absolutely not. i’m here to pass you your water bottles and that’s about it 🫶”

doesn’t matter

niki’s already dragging you over to the pull up bar and jay’s just smirking his stupid jay smirk because he KNOWS you cannot reach that shit

“okay go, just try one,” niki encourages innocently

you swear if he wasn’t so buff you’d fight him right there

this kid knows damn well you cannot reach that bar

before you can say anything, your boyfriend luckily comes to the rescue

without a word, he grabs your waist lifting you with such ease that it makes you a bit flustered

IN THE BACKGROUND SUNGHOONS GIGGLING LIKE A DUMBASS

“shortie”

you whip your head over to the silver haired boy in offense before looking back at jay, “yah, you’re my boyfriend, why aren’t you stopping this discrimination against me 😾”

he goes 🧍‍

“but.. its true”

you flick his forehead in retaliation ☺️

anyway so with the help of jay you reach the pull up bar and surprise yourself by actually doing A WHOLE PULL UP 💪

jay’s jaw dropped and he starts clapping and smiling and JSJND HE WAS SO PROUD OF YOU !!

“that’s my strong girl. wah, can you do another one for me?”

you folded right there

you were so giddy you were like yesyeys give me more praise

SO YOU DID ANOTHER ONE! 🎉🎉🎉🎊🎊

before flopping to the ground because damn pull ups are hard

jay made a delicious meal when you both got home that day because YOU DID TWO PULL UPS <3

there’s like a silent agreement between you and jay that when you’re standing up, he’s the one giving the affection

it goes from just reaching down to give you little pecks to resting his chin on your head with a warm backhug

god jay loves back hugs so much, especially since you’re so small, it’s easier to just wrap you up in his arms like a burrito n’ trap you there forever >:)

sometimes it’s a bit too much though

“babe please i’m going to choke”

“sorry angel, you���re just so squeezable!”

you give him the side eye

BUT when you’re sitting or lying down.. it’s your time to shine 🥹🥹

finally you can see his handsome face without having to crane your neck up 😞

you use him lying down much to your advantage <33

y’know when jay wears his classic boyfriend outfit with the white muscle top UAHSJSH

you pull him onto your lap n’ he’s like 🤨🤨??

bro is a strong believer that you should be the one in his lap not the other way around

BUT once you get your fingers running through his hair n’ massaging his temples he just deflates <3333

jay doesn’t get taken care of often so he’s just amazed because wait?? it feels so good???

then it leads to you giving him a full body massage because it’s what the man deserves

then as you’re massaging his stupid muscly arms he goes “your hands are so weak i can’t even feel anything love”

HE HAS TO TEASE YOU SOMETIMES OKAY it’s out of love <3

all in all. jay is your number one fan no matter how short you are (and secretly, he doesn’t want you to grow!! >:c)

hugs for my short readers out there 🫂🫂

likes don’t tell me much, reblogs n’ comments are always very appreciated if you enjoyed <3

© delcakoo on tumblr. all rights reserved. do not rewrite, cross-post, translate, copy, etc.

perm taglist: @duolingofanaccount @strawberry-sunset-skies @scented-morker @koshinene @boowoowho @sultrybaby @yunjinlvrr @lov3niki @yujiecho @monstaxdirtywonk @dekusgirl @l1lac-dreamer @kodzukii

[min-arya]

pov: you are dating with park jongseong ♡

[min-arya]

( ♡ ) ... BASIC !

profile and facts ⭑ background ⭑dating history ⭑ visuals ⭑ sooa things ⭑ wardrobe ⭑ styling

( ♡ ) ... RELATIONSHIP !

sooa with enhypen ⭑sooa with hybe artists ⭑ sooa with other idols ⭑ sooa with her family ⭑ fan favorite moments

( ♡ ) ... WRITINGS !

throughout the years ⭑ drabbles ⭑ reaction

( ♡ ) ... SNS !

twitter ⭑ weverse ⭑ instagram ⭑ stan twitter ⭑ fan videos

( ♡ ) ... DISCOGRAPHY !

solo work ⭑ collaborations ⭑ writing ⭑ production

( ♡ ) ... ERAS !

border : day one ⭑ border : carnival ⭑ dimension : dilemma⭑dimension : answer ⭑ manifesto : day 1 

( ♡ ) ... BROADCAST !

interviews ⭑ vlives ⭑ youtube ⭑ en-o'clock ⭑ enter key ⭑ i-land

( ♡ ) ... NEWS !

announcements ⭑ articles ⭑ scandals

( ♡ ) ... MISC !

©️ENHA-SOOA

[min-arya]

[ENHYPEN OFFICIAL]

[Vlog_Behind] 📸

Jay 🐈‍⬛ and Sunoo 🦊

The release of school uniform self photo(shoot) for graduation commemoration! ✨

[min-arya]

If you’re a real human person still using the default tumblr avatar, consider changing it.

why should you change it?

When you guys pop up in our notifications, most seasoned tumblr users will suspect you’re a bot and block on sight.

why do we block immediately?

tumblr has a history of bots trying to infiltrate and establish a connection to a valid, existing blog in order to populate google searches. Simply liking or reblogging a post, not just adding a scam link to it, establishes this connection. Tumblr users don’t want this to happen, especially if it’s a scammy p*rn bot. So, we often block on sight.

So now I have to reblog stuff AND change my pfp?

Well, of course that’s up to you! I just want to explain why you may have been already blocked by an artist/blogger you may have discovered recently, and how you can avoid it in the future.

Reblogging does help creators more than likes because your reblogs will show up on the dash of those that may follow you. Plus, reblogging puts that post on your own blog, and in case the original gets deleted or edited by the OP, it’ll be on your blog like that–forever (or until you delete your blog). Nice.

Here are some free icons created by catalyststuff on freepik. Highly recommend their art for a simple replacement!

[min-arya]

ENHYPEN .:. L'Officiel Philippines — cover shoot

[min-arya]

omg 🥺 thank you for adding me to this list aaaaa

hanii!! i kinda want a favor and idk if u take asks like these so u can totally ignore this if u dont wanna answer.. i wanted to ask if u have any soft smut fic recs?? uk where the member and oc are just so damn deep in love and its just fkn emotional and soft... ukwim???? and like, totally okay if reader cries due to emotional overwhelm bc im fkn soft rn.. u can give fics for any member uve read for but... yoongi and tae🥺👉🏽👈🏽 (✌🏽)

ooh i’ve not done much reading recently because i’ve been so busy :( but i’ve got these for tae at the top of my head :

thoughts with actions by @kissmetae

claire de lune by @gukslut

dream by @kimtaehyunq

hold me by @jjungkookislife

in my calvin’s by @softyoongiionly

honeymoon by @min-arya

i’d recommend that you check out @moonchild1 ,, @ggukkieland for fic recs because they’re my go to accounts !! <3

[min-arya]

JAY .:. DARK MOON : THE BLOOD ALTAR — making film one

[min-arya]

2:12 PM — jay smiled softly, his hands entangling with yours as your head laid on his chest. cuddling with him wasn't exactly unusual, his incessant need for you to be around him at all times is quite endearing. he would never admit it but jay's quite the needy boyfriend.

what caught his eye is the fact you hadn't been wearing the bracelet he had gotten you a week ago. jay saw you eyeing it at the mall, and quickly made the purchase despite you claiming that he didn't need to. but he shushed you with a peck on the lips, distracting you from the fact that he was already handed the small gift bag. "why aren't you wearing it?" jay pouted softly, an obvious annoyance in his voice when he spoke.

you laughed softly, turning your head to look up at him. "that bracelet should be worn to a fancy place or restaurant, not for when i'm hanging out with my boyfriend on his breaks." you weren't lying, it wasn't an accessory you could wear everyday. it was more for a romantic date than a casual hangout. but jay wasn't having it.

"are you saying you want me to take you out on a fancy date or that you want me to buy you an accessory that you can wear all the time?" he spoke, making you shake your head at his assumptions. "no, you idiot. you don't have to buy me stuff, jay. hanging out with you is enough."

jay shrugged, continuing to mindlessly play with your fingers. "i know, but i want to." he told you, he liked seeing you wear whatever he bought for you. seeing you wear what he spent money on was endearing, another thing about jay is that he felt it made up for him being so busy. "i like buying you things, and whatever you want, i'll get it."

he knows he can be a bit too much, constant teasing and remarks. so he made a conscious decision of buying you whatever you wanted. "hm, in that case. buy me the moon." jay smiled at your stupid comment, rolling his eyes and sitting up, looking down at you. a fondness growing in his eyes. "what? is it too much for you, rich boy? but you said you would buy me anything." you fake pouted, causing him to groan and look away from you.

a laugh left your mouth, smiling slightly and sighing. "no, but, seriously. being here, like this, with you. it's more than enough for me, jay." the words you told him sprouted a source of comfort for the boy. his eyes meeting yours again before bending down to press a kiss onto your lips, it was slow and short. but you didn't mind it, your heart swelling at how sweet it felt. "is this the part where you confess your undying love for me?"

"no, but i will. one day." and he kept true to his words, because he does love you, more than anything. and if he could buy the moon, he would, just for you.

[min-arya]

ENOUGHHH WHO DID THIS 💀

[min-arya]

﹆❍ silent treatment - nishimura riki ❍﹆

gn!reader, genre: angst to fluff, established relationship, wc: 858, warning(s): mild language

what was done was done and what happened had happened. yes, it hadn't been one of his best moments. but ni-ki was ready to put it all in the past.

arguing with you was never fun. but you two were a petty bunch. neither of you were ever willing to admit you were in the wrong. your prides and the need to defend yourselves always subdued the rational solution - which was apologizing for any misunderstandings right then and there before the situation escalated out of hand. as of now, you both were still in the process of learning to do so.

ni-ki hated getting mad at you and he felt even worse when you were mad at him. both of you knew the best thing to do after a fight was maintain some distance between yourselves, reflect over your words and actions and calm down before interacting again.

usually a night spent in two different rooms did the trick. but when ni-ki entered your shared bedroom to check up on you, it seemed that time hadn't sufficed.

ni-ki could tell you were awake, even though the steady rise and fall of your chest would indicate otherwise. despite not being able to see your face, he could also tell that you were still fuming under your blanket. had his words really affected you that much?

he wasn't sure if saying something to you now would be wise, and so he quietly walked into the bathroom, deciding to tidy up for the morning. by the time he came back out, you were sitting up with your back resting against the headboard, flipping through the pages of a book ni-ki knew you were already done reading. it became clear that you were still cross with him and he'd be lucky if he heard a single word from you today.

giving someone the silent treatment when you lived under the same roof was difficult. but you were willing to take up the struggle. what had happened the previous night wasn't something you were just going to forget, because doing so would mean that you had excused ni-ki's behavior.

in his mind the conflict might have been stupid and unnecessary. but it wasn't like that for you, and that's what ni-ki failed to realize. he never tried putting himself in your shoes or seeing things from your perspective. if he did, then he'd understand why this was more than just you being 'bossy and controlling'.

throughout the day, ni-ki attempted to strike up a conversation with you, and he was unsuccessful in his efforts. obviously, he didn't acknowledge your argument at all, choosing to act like it had never happened.

the longer you ignored him, the more frustrated he became. you were amazed by how narrow minded he was being. if you knew any better, he was probably busy pitying himself right now.

a part of you was worried that this was going to lead to another fight. and if that happened, you knew you were going to break down completely. you could see that your actions were hurting and infuriating him, and while that pained you greatly, this was the least you could do for yourself.

finally, a few hours into the afternoon, ni-ki made his last shot.

"y/n, i know you're mad at me about last night and i just wanna say that i'm sorry." he paused, waiting for you to look at him before he said anything else.

when your eyes locked with his, he swallowed nervously. your stare was blank. you looked uninterested. he knew now that you weren't forgiving him until he gave you a sincere apology. and it didn't matter how difficult you made things for him because he should have realized this fact sooner.

"i hurt you, and the fact that i tried to show you what you were feeling was wrong was a dick move. it doesn't matter what my intentions were, because if i offended you, i should have apologized on the spot instead of justifying myself. i'm sorry y/n."

ni-ki's heart was thundering in his chest. he hoped and prayed that you would accept his apology. being the way that he was, swallowing his pride and admitting that he'd fucked up was difficult. even though it made him feel vulnerable, he wasn't going to continue defending himself, especially when he so clearly was at fault.

you blinked a few times and cracked a smile, sending a wave of relief washing over ni-ki. he opened his arms and engulfed you in a hug, holding you close and tight. you wrapped your arms around his waist and nuzzled your face into his neck, glad that you could drop the act now.

"i'm sorry too ni-ki, that was super immature of me," you apologized, feeling bad for stressing him out. he shook his head and pulled back. "it's alright. i totally deserved it." you patted his chest and grabbed his hand, pulling him towards the couch. "how 'bout we watch a movie and pretend like this never happened?"

ni-ki reached for the remote and turned the tv on. "sounds like a plan to me."

- requested by rice 🐇

[min-arya]

𝑆𝑁𝑈𝐺𝐺𝐿𝐸𝑆 𝑊𝐼𝑇𝐻 𝐽𝐴𝑌

➪ pairing: jay x fem!reader

➪ genre(s): fluff, fluff, and more fluff

➪ tw: none

➪ wc: 0.7k

➪ in which you find yourself unable to resist clinging to your ultra cozy looking boyfriend.

➪ a/n: this was requested by the lovely em and i fully agree, there needs to be more snuggly jay content! </3 i hope this satisfies your soft jay feels hehe ( @goldenhypen )

there are two things you can't hold yourself back from: one being emptying out an entire can of whipped cream into your mouth and two being smothering your lovely boyfriend in an endless shower of affection when presented with the opportunity to do so. and, well, it just so happens that you're all out of whipped cream on this day.

as you venture from the living room to note out loud that you need your beloved whipped cream to be added to the grocery store list, you're halted in your steps when you find jay stretched out on the sofa. you think maybe he's sleeping and you decide you won't disturb him—he has been working hard lately after all. he's laying flat on his stomach and his face is hidden under the baggy material of his hoodie sleeves as his arms act as a makeshift pillow for his head. you can't help but smile adoringly at how peaceful and cozy he looks.

you tip toe over to the table next to the side of the sofa where his head is closest to and pick up the small pad of paper you both make a habit to write your grocery list on. after all, you find yourselves suddenly thinking of something you'd like to eat while watching various food shows on the television and the unusual spot became quite handy. you scribble down whipped cream onto one of the available lines, failing to notice jay lift his head slightly to peek at you with drowsy eyes.

"will you also write apple juice on there? we're watching the twins this weekend." his voice startles you and you peer down at him from over the top of the pad of paper in your hand.

"i thought you were asleep," you muse lightheartedly before writing the requested item on the list just under your whipped cream.

"just resting," he murmurs in response before tucking his face away once more.

you set the pad of paper back down on the table and run your fingers through his silky brown locks. an appreciative hum muffles into his arms and you soon find yourself rounding to the front of the sofa to clamber on top of him. you settle down comfortably with your cheek pressed against his upper back, your arms hooking under his own in a slightly restricted embrace.

"there's an entire second couch for you and you've gotta lay on me?" he teases, though he makes no effort to move out from under you or make you move off of him.

"but why use a couch when i've got a whole boyfriend to utilize instead?" you laugh lightly in return, making your point by giving him a soft squeeze.

jay mumbles something incoherent with a small laugh of his own before his lips manage to find the pads of your fingertips under all the mess of his hoodie sleeves, giving them a feathery kiss that has your cheeks growing warm. before you know it, you're being shifted underneath him and pinned to the cushions below with his entire weight.

"hey!" you wheeze out dramatically, "there's an entire second couch, why are you laying on me?"

"but why use a couch when i've got a whole girlfriend to utilize instead?" jay answers back in a playful voice that's meant to mock yours. "it's your turn, in this relationship we are equals."

you roll your eyes playfully but allow him to nestle comfortably on top of you, his arms now the ones to encircle you while your shoulder becomes his new pillow. a warmth blooms in your chest and leaves a pleasant fuzzy feeling thrumming with each beat of your heart as you wrap your arms around his shoulders, returning the embrace he holds you in. his soft breaths tickle your neck as they gradually begin to grow more even and slow.

"i love you," you whisper before pressing a gentle kiss to his cheek.

a sleepy smile stretches across his lips before he whispers the same affirming words back to you followed by a matching kiss being placed delicately against your shoulder. the two of you lay there for what feels like hours and jay eventually does fall asleep, but you lay wide awake with your brain turning to mush as you can't help but think of how incredibly sweet and soft your boyfriend looks right now. if only you had a can of whipped cream to complete this perfect moment...

© enhasfever

[min-arya]

─𖤐── PAIRING. JAY X READER GENRE. FLUFF, ESTABLISHED-RELATIONSHIP!AU

[ 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑬𝑭𝑭𝑬𝑪𝑻 ] blinking blanky at your phone's screen while it was turned off, you let out a prolonged hum with parted lips catching jay's attention due to your sudden silence. “what is it?” he asks, tilting his head to meet your eyes and you don't seem to meet his despite him being in front of you.

your mind blanks, his gorgeous lashes that made the light white from above look like they were dancing. his pink lips around his coffee's straw looks very kissable but you remind yourself you are in public and his habitual side-lift before he smiles melts your heart. you can't seem to think in front of him.

“i was going to say something,” you said, dragging your words and shaking your head, gazing around the café trying to remind yourself the thought you forgot.

as you both walk away from the café, “what was it?” jay asks, standing closer to you suddenly. “um, about what mom said about yo—” pausing, you meet his beady eyes—staring at you as if you were something precious, once again your mind going blank. what did your mother say about jay? actually when did you speak about jay to her?

“babe, continue,” he smile but you stomp your feet and push him away, sighing heavily. “did i do something?” he asks, worry in his tone and you groan in response.

“dude, i can't think when you look at me like that!” you pout, cheeks dusted with the effect he has on you and you blink, locking your gaze with his, “you have the most horrid effect on me. when you look me, i forgot everything,” you complain, rolling your eyes.

“love, i think that might just be your forgetfulness,” jay smiles ear to ear, his arm swinging around your shoulder and you note the burn on his cheeks, sighing again.

“that's just the you effect, love,” you said, pressing closer to him and then, you remember. “right!” you gasp, “mom said you need to stop coming over everyday or else she is going to put a ban on how often you see me,” you finally said in a single breath and now, it was his turn to gasp.

“what? that's unfair,” he yells, “she has a point,” you reply calmly, nodding your head.

jay scoffs before asking, “how so?” making you grin towards him, raising your brows, “you come over as soon as the sun comes up and leave only when everyone is going to bed,”

“hah! that's the you effect,” he retorts using your own words with an unamused expression on his face, “can you blame me for that?”

©KDYISM, 2021 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

[min-arya]

GUESS WHO'S UGLY CRYING RN 🤪✌🏻

i'll see you in jeju - squid game!au

genre: angst

member: jungwon (enhypen)

warnings/notes: gn!reader SQUID GAME SPOILERS, squid game!au, mentions and implications of death, relationship between jw and reader could be platonic or romantic, it's up to you

a/n: squid game is all the hype rn and i loved the series so i decided to write something for it! this is based partly on some storylines in the actual tv show. let me know if you want a different squid game story for a different member!

you used to see him around at university. he was part of the taekwondo team, always lugging around a big duffel bag full of his athlete stuff.

he was also in your general history class. being a student-athlete, it was only natural that everyone gravitated towards him. he was, indeed, a popular one. that's why you were so nervous sitting next to him when you were assigned to be partners for a paper.

"let's just list down the different sections of the paper then divide it up," he had suggested with a smile, pointing at the rubric sheet in your hands. he took it from you gently, fingers brushing against yours.

he was cute up close. cuter than when you'd admire him from afar.

"jungwon," you had whispered out of nowhere. he eyed you quizzically, eyebrows raised. your eyes went wide when you realized what you just did.

"th-that's your name, right?" you said, trying to recover from the embarrassment. he chuckled and nodded, handing back the paper to you.

"yep, that's me."

you never got to talk to him again after that. you never worked together for another project, never got to say things to each other other than 'hi' and 'hello' when passing each other by.

you used to see him around at university. perfect, popular, and the last person you'd be seeing in a place like this.

"jungwon."

you were shaking, hands balled into fists as you stood straight as a board. of course, he didn't look back. he didn't even answer.

"green light."

jungwon had turned to you momentarily, eyes widening as his gaze settled on you.

"go, go!" you whisper-shouted, fingers digging into his back as you pushed him forward. the giant doll-like character was still in the midst of her green light phase, the remaining players around rushing past both of you.

"don't hide behind me," jungwon said, tone somewhat threatening as he jogged forward.

"red light."

you squeezed your eyes shut as you froze, gunshots ringing one after the other as more players were eliminated. a loud thud was heard next to you and you frantically opened your eyes, hoping it wasn't jungwon.

you breathed a sigh of relief as his tall figure still towered in front of you, his shoulders were tense and stance wide as he steadied himself in front of the giant character's gaze.

"green light."

jungwon reached back and pulled on your hand, pushing you forward in front of him. you protested, finding yourself completely exposed to the character's motion sensors.

"you'll thank me later once you cross the line first," jungwon said through gritted teeth, nudging you forward even more.

---

"can i get a thank you for what i did earlier?"

you had looked up to see jungwon approaching you, his own dinner in his hands. he settled on the floor beside you as he unpacked his food.

"what should i be thanking you for? you broke my strategy," you quipped, taking a bite out of your sandwich.

"almost all the people behind me died," jungwon said matter-of-factly. "if i hadn't let you go first, you would have been one of them."

you sat in silence to ponder on that for a bit.

"i would have just run faster during green light," you said quietly. jungwon laughed, nudging you with his elbow.

"you're a funny one, aren't you? i kinda wish we could have been friends in university," jungwon wondered out loud.

"we can be friends now," you suggested, reaching your hand out to him. jungwon flashed you a bright smile, dimples on full display.

he took your hand in his, shaking it firmly.

"friends, it is."

---

"please, no, it's just a small break, please-"

you flinched, the gunshot a little too close to you for your liking. despite this, you continued on, breathing heavily as you poked and scraped away at the caramelized sugar in your hands.

you were frantic. there were barely two minutes left and you were only halfway through.

you felt a soft kick on your leg just as a figure was about to pass you by. you looked up to see it was jungwon.

"lighter," jungwon mouthed as he dropped something at your feet. you scrambled to hide it from the guards, grabbing it immediately before encasing it in your fist.

you took a peek and saw that it was, indeed, a lighter. you scanned the area and saw the space under the slide was empty. you hurriedly crawled towards the plaything, making sure the object in your hands was hidden to the red-suited guards.

that day, thanks to jungwon, you made it with only five seconds to spare.

---

"where did you get it?"

"where did i get what?" jungwon asked as the two of you lounged around in the dormitory. the rest of the players were in their own subdued conversations, completely unaware of the way the two of you passed the previous game.

"the lighter," you whispered. the two of you were seated on the floor against some beds, yours and jungwon's shoulders almost touching. he snickered, holding his hand out.

"i'll tell you if you give it back," jungwon said. you gave him a look before eyeing the other players around you. you reached into your pocket and discreetly handed it back to him.

"player 420 brought it and dropped it like a dumbass," jungwon explained, pointing at a player across the room.

your eyes landed on a man conversing with two other male players.

player 420 had chiseled features and dark hair in an undercut. he was talking to player 115 and player 128, both having the same defined features and tall stature as 420.

definitely some of the scarier players you've seen.

"they'd kill you if they found out you stole from them," you said lowly. jungwon just laughed.

"i'd like to see them try," jungwon comments.

"they can't take me away from you just like that."

---

"...legs wide, face forward, and lean back as far as you can. remember, tug-o-war is about intelligence and not just strength."

jungwon's words rang in your ear as you forced all your strength through your body and into the rope in your hands. your teammates' grunts of effort were nearly drowned out by the ringing in your ears. you've never done anything as exhausting as this. but, you were fighting for your life. you had no choice.

just a little more.

"pull, now!" jungwon yelled from the front and the rest of the team complied, syncing all of your movements as you pulled the other team closer to the edge.

cries of despair from the other side reached your ears and you knew you shouldn't have felt anything but remorse, but the twinge of hope in your heart was too strong to ignore. it was every man for himself. there was no time to feel sorry for one another.

that twinge of hope turned into a bigger, warmer feeling of relief as you felt the blade cut the rope in half. your team fell into a tired heap, panting and heaving from the effort.

as your team filed back into the elevator, jungwon took your hand in his and squeezed. all you could do was squeeze back weakly.

"are you okay?" you asked as you reenter the dormitory, hand still held tightly in jungwon's.

"yeah," jungwon replied. "but, for a moment i thought we were gonna die."

you gave jungwon a long, hard look. he looked up from the floor and into your eyes.

"all i could think of was...'i have to keep ______ alive.'"

you felt tears well up in your eyes, but you blinked them away.

"you're real funny, jungwon," you said as you lightly punched his arm.

"you're the only person i know in here," jungwon continued. "i want you to survive."

"what about yourself?" you asked.

jungwon just smiled.

---

"you'll be my partner, right?" jungwon asked as the instructions were dealt. you immediately nod, intertwining your fingers with his.

the game setup brought a wave of nostalgia over you. the village looked exactly like the place you grew up in. it gripped at your heart almost painfully.

however, nothing could compare to the stab of pain that came when you heard the full mechanics of the game.

the ringing in your ears came back. your whole body seemed to have turned into jelly. jungwon had to prop you up to keep you from falling to your knees.

"let's just talk for a bit," jungwon suggested after he had calmed you down. "you can tell me about your family and your hobbies and places you want to go to."

you felt a lump in your throat as you thought about your family.

"i don't wanna talk about my family," you had replied as the two of you settled on the front steps of one of the fake houses.

"hobbies, then?" jungwon asked, gripping at your hand.

"that's boring."

"then, tell me where you wanna go," jungwon insisted. "where would you travel if you won all that money?"

there was a long pause.

"i wanna go to jeju," you had whispered. you turned to jungwon, eyes misty.

"let's go to jeju together."

and once again, jungwon had only smiled.

---

20 minutes had already passed. 20 minutes of talking and pouring your heart out to jungwon and him doing the same to you. it was 20 minutes of just you and him. him and you. two people lost in their own world.

this past week was the most trying week of your life, but all that was made bearable because of jungwon. looking at him now, in the present, you realize just how much you've grown attached to him.

you know it's strange. you barely knew each other before all this, but the bond you build through numerous life and death situations is different. for some reason, time doesn't matter.

you wonder if he feels the same way, too.

"hey," jungwon calls out. he takes his hand out of yours before gently cradling your face against his palms. he turns you so you can face him.

"we don't have much time left," jungwon says quietly. you shake your head, tears springing up in your eyes once again.

"i can't play," you resist, shaking your head and holding onto jungwon's wrists.

"______, if we don't play, both of us will die," jungwon says through gritted teeth. his eyes are wide with fear, mirroring you. you look away as you break down, the tears finally spilling over.

"w-what game are we gonna play?" you say through your tears. jungwon stands up and offers his hand to you. you take it hesitantly, letting him pull you up.

"what if...," jungwon begins, eyes flitting to the side as he thinks of what to play.

"we see who can throw the marble closest to the wall?" jungwon finishes, pointing at the wall next to the steps you were just sitting on.

"oh," is all you can say at this point, too numb to think of anything else.

"come on, you go first," jungwon suggests, nudging the bag of marbles in your hand. "winner gets to take all the other's marbles."

a heavy feeling settles in your chest as you face the wall. you begrudgingly take a marble out of the bag, rolling it between your fingers for a few seconds.

"jungwon," you begin.

"hm?"

"i'll see you in jeju, okay?"

jungwon laughs, reaching up to pinch your cheek.

"okay."

you take a deep breath before throwing the marble towards the wall. you throw a little too hard and it bounces off the concrete and rolls away. your heart sinks as you watch your marble come to a stop a few inches away from your target.

"that's not bad," jungwon encourages. he gives you a big smile before taking out a marble of his own.

a few moments pass with jungwon staring forward at the wall, as if lost in thought. you watch him worriedly, aware of the time that's passing. you're about to say something but then, jungwon throws.

or more appropriately, jungwon drops the marble, barely putting any power in his arm.

you look on, horrified, as jungwon's marble lands near his feet, its shiny exterior taunting you.

"you asshole," you mutter. you shove jungwon away from you, anger and fear bubbling up inside you. he drops his bag of marbles, some of it spilling out and rolling away.

"why did you do that?!" you ask through tears as you hit jungwon on the chest repeatedly. jungwon grabs at your wrists to stop you, but you struggle against his grip.

"throw it again! throw it like you mean it, jungwon!" you yell, fighting against him as he tries to keep you at arms' length.

"i meant it, ______," jungwon says quietly. "i meant it when i said i have to keep you alive."

"you're so full of shit, yang jungwon!" you nearly scream. "take another throw!"

"even if i did, i'd still lose on purpose for you! i'd lose on purpose again and again just to see you live!" jungwon bellows, shaking you violently.

you stop struggling, going limp in jungwon's arms as he pulls you close to him.

"win for the both of us, okay?" jungwon whispers in your ear. you sob against his shoulder as you cling onto him, fingers gripping at his clothes as you try to keep him close.

"i'll see you in jeju," jungwon says.