mr-kiwi-the-wizard

[mr-kiwi-the-wizard]

The Forbidden Fruit - Adel's Lazy Gaming Show ep1

I've deleted all of my streams because the views went down from 100 to 0 views a glitch on all of my videos so now I will focus on my tumblr forget about my youtube just follow me on tumblr I really want to make it as a streamer

I know this lesson. I've learned it a long time ago. But just one last blaze just one more fire maybe just maybe I will make it on tumblr

[mr-kiwi-the-wizard]

I'm actually this units onboard computer.

Really a small witch piloting me at all times.

[mr-kiwi-the-wizard]

Things you can stay instead of "k1lled", "murked" or "unalived":

involuntarily converted to room temperature

cancelled on a corporeal level

successfully transitioned into fertiliser

rendered permanently horizontal

sent to investigate the potential existence of an afterlife

[mr-kiwi-the-wizard]

People be like "I'm a poor little ant 😭 please let me work 🐜 I want to make the thing but I've exceeded my little ant life expectancy and must die"

[mr-kiwi-the-wizard]

“So let me get this straight. We’re here to rescue a princess.”

“That’s right.”

“At the request of a princess.”

“Right again.”

“And you, who will be leading the expedition, are also a princess.”

“You’re very perceptive.”

“How big is your royal family, again?“

“We don’t have one.”

“But–“

“We overthrew our monarchy centuries ago, but we kept most of the titles around. The rank of ‘princess’ is held by the directors in charge of various civil service branches.“

“Huh. And the princess we’re rescuing today is in charge of…?”

“Public sanitation.”

“The Lord of Death’s Dominion kidnapped your public sanitation director?”

“We think he’s a little confused.”

[mr-kiwi-the-wizard]

imagine someone thinking of you and buying you flowers

[mr-kiwi-the-wizard]

Anti depressants are like a dam against your emotions.

Nothing good comes from dismantling a full dam.

A few weeks ago I ran out of my antidepressants and I thought to myself: "let's see how long I can go without antidepressants" because I like challenging myself and I like doing difficult things

I cannot stress how bad this idea was. please do not be like me. I have gained nothing from this experience, I don't know what I was thinking I would gain. there is no glory in suffering

I should go take my meds

[mr-kiwi-the-wizard]

Low social battery?

I'm just tired from the ballroom dance you call social politics and want to sit down with some punch, chill, I'm still here.

[mr-kiwi-the-wizard]

Sounds like you want better hardware rather than software. (Two completely different things.

Unfortunately because phones need to. Be so god dang small, in your hand and touch screen you cant fit a lot in it physically unless you're after a small brick that needs its own belt pouch to not drag your pants off your hips.

(which sounds hilarious and novel enough it could become a trend. Send some drafts out.)

I don't want my cellphone to have AI I want it to have 3 days of battery time. I don't want my computer to have AI preinstalled I want it to have seven usb ports and high ram at affordable price. I don't want my games to have AI built levels I want them to be so optimized I could run them on a nokia.

[mr-kiwi-the-wizard]

Avatar of Me

Artist: Greg Hildebrandt TCG Player Link Scryfall Link EDHREC Link

[mr-kiwi-the-wizard]

I am of the mindset that if I'm asked a question with only one acceptable answer then there is no worth nor value in my answer.

I am not needed in this equation.

If I say the RIGHT answer then it was either out of truth or fear and there's no way to tell if I was speaking the truth or a little lie to get you off me.

If I say the WRONG answer then I am vilified for ever declaring such a thing.

If you have to genuinely know if someone supports or opposes something.

To get the truth.

Then you must be ready willing and prepared to accept and leave someone at peace no matter what answer they give to a question with a very obvious answer.

[mr-kiwi-the-wizard]

wizard college is going to kill me I swear to god. I just saw someone without a component satchel reach into their pocket and pull out a handful of LOOSE tapioca to use as a substitute for blood in their fell ritual. and it worked. I've never been so fucking mad.

[mr-kiwi-the-wizard]

character misses their shot and the villain goes "ha! you missed." and the main character goes "did i?" and then shoots the villain again while they're frantically looking around the room for what the hero could possibly have aiming for instead

[mr-kiwi-the-wizard]

kamala should do her own january 6th. i think it would be funny

[mr-kiwi-the-wizard]

No one said a large rock delivered by trebuchet can't be a gift in disguise.

Pukicho whats your opinion on the passage of time

Hoping it'll eventually stop doing that

[mr-kiwi-the-wizard]

I know it has nothing to do with the post but I just imagine were both on an artic expedition together and like half a week into being trapped by the ice sheets you just go "nah dawg" and wonder off into the frozen mist.

pro-abortion. pro-divorce. i believe we have the god-given right to give up

[mr-kiwi-the-wizard]

My nurse unironically recommended this to me once. She said it was because our pain meds are highly addictive.

(I have so much fucking opium at home)

*doctor voice* hmmmm…..have you tried this revolutionary method called painmaxxxing? it is where you do not bother me and adjust to being in agony all the time and we do nothing to resolve the root cause or treat the symptoms. you don’t wish to try painmaxxxing? you’re being non-compliant with the treatment plan I have just provided you?