mysticalstardust

[mysticalstardust]

Do you believe in second chances?

Yea I usually give about 5 or 6 before I realize I’m a fucking idiot

[mysticalstardust]

Oh to be white im america

savage

[mysticalstardust]

a bird apartment

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When you make the football team try a stunt since they’re always sayin cheer isn’t a real sport

[mysticalstardust]

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“[pitching the proposal for Mononoke-hime (1997)] There cannot be a happy ending to the fight between the raging gods and humans. However, even in the middle of hatred and killings, there are things worth living for. A wonderful meeting, or a beautiful thing can exist. We depict hatred, but it is to depict that there are more important things. We depict a curse, to depict the joy of liberation. What we should depict is, how the boy understands the girl, and the process in which the girl opens her heart to the boy. At the end, the girl will say to the boy, “I love you, Ashitaka. But I cannot forgive humans.” Smiling, the boy should say, “That is fine. Live with me.” ― Hayao Miyazaki

PRINCESS MONONOKE / もののけ姫 1997 | dir. Hayao Miyazaki / 宮崎 駿

[mysticalstardust]

Produce an emotionally moving one-sentence story.

[mysticalstardust]

Labels

I hate labels. I hate that people have the need to name everything. Cant we just like whoever we want without being called lesbian, gay, asexual? All these terms are just made up so people still have to conform to a specific 'type' no matter what. How can you expect over 7 billion to be only two genders, or have two sexualities? It's almost 2017 but people still cant wrap their heads around the fact that there's so much diversity in this world and we are finally getting braver to come forward and bring a sort of awareness.

I'd like to believe one day we will live in a world where you can love whoever you want and marry whoever you want and feel whatever you want without being put into a box and labelled as anything except human but sadly I doubt i'll see that in my lifetime.

~Dec 22, 2016

[mysticalstardust]

My past demons still come back to haunt me

im not strong enough to fight back

sometimes im not even sure if i want to

the release is bliss, refreshing

but tears still roll down my face 

ive never seen the blood 

i wonder what thats like   

the voices are louder than my thoughts

im drowning

~idk? lol

[mysticalstardust]

Aftermath

I feel like i'm being selfish. I'm only thinking about me. but I wanted this to work, I really did. I care for you more than i ever thought i was going to. Even growing up I never thought i could have the emotional capability to be able to put someone before me, to truly care. I've grown up self-centered. all my wrongdoings were swept away under the guise of 'youth'. I don't deserve this. I don't deserve you.

i keep hurting you and even though you say its okay, i know its not. We've become toxic. all we do is find faults in each other when they're only what makes us human. We should not be penalized for having feelings and acting on them. I shouldn't be getting mad at you for things that even I,  in hindsight, realize is justified. People say this goes both ways, that you are as much to blame as I was but even though I too can point out your faults, your biggest mistake was loving me.

I could turn this into a piece of loathing where I could say I despise you for crossing boundaries but I can't because i still care for you and I probably always will. If this is where it ends, know that in the end, you were special to me and i hope that you can find someone for you that can love you back just as much, something I could not give you.

I'm sorry I had to do this to you because as hard as it is for me, I know it is worse for you and i hate myself for that. I wish that I could do it, for you but I can feel myself draining at every fight, every disagreement. every time you pout and say I don't pay attention to you or when you insinuate that I'm not enough and I don't show enough love or give enough time. it hurts to know that I can't solve this. This is me and 'me' is not enough for you. T struggle my whole life with the constant fear of rejection and truth be told, I've rejected myself a long time ago so when you say that I should do more, you're only cementing it deeper within me that I will never be enough. I cant do that to you. It's not fair.

~ Dec 11, 2019

[mysticalstardust]

Rain

With the rain comes melancholy

The sadness and despair

But after the sun comes

The light, nothing can compare

Although the beautiful sight

Might give you hope and bloom

Still try all your might

We're still shrouded in gloom

The heart can only take so much

Take the bad with the good

Take it all as such

The spectrum of the mood

~ Dec 4, 2019

[mysticalstardust]

Break

I feel like i'm being selfish. I'm only thinking about me. but I wanted this to work, I really did. I care for you more than i ever thought i was going to. Even growing up I never thought i could have the emotional capability to be able to put someone before me, to truly care. I've grown up self-centered. all my wrongdoings were swept away under the guise of 'youth'. I don't deserve this. I don't deserve you.

i keep hurting you and even though you say its okay, i know its not. We've become toxic. all we do is find faults in each other when they're only what makes us human. We should not be penalized for having feelings and acting on them. I shouldn't be getting mad at you for things that even I,  in hindsight, realize is justified. People say this goes both ways, that you are as much to blame as I was but even though I too can point out your faults, your biggest mistake was loving me.

I could turn this into a piece of loathing where I could say I despise you for crossing boundaries but I can't because i still care for you and I probably always will. If this is where it ends, know that in the end, you were special to me and i hope that you can find someone for you that can love you back just as much, something I could not give you.

I'm sorry I had to do this to you because as hard as it is for me, I know it is worse for you and i hate myself for that. I wish that I could do it, for you but I can feel myself draining at every fight, every disagreement. every time you pout and say I don't pay attention to you or when you insinuate that I'm not enough and I don't show enough love or give enough time. it hurts to know that I can't solve this. This is me and 'me' is not enough for you. T struggle my whole life with the constant fear of rejection and truth be told, I've rejected myself a long time ago so when you say that I should do more, you're only cementing it deeper within me that I will never be enough. I cant do that to you. It's not fair.

~Nov 12, 2019

[mysticalstardust]

Crush

Meaningless moments and fleeting glances,

I fix my hair, i perfect my stance.

Overwhelmed with emotions, triggered by a stranger,

Cant my heart and mind understand the danger?

It's deep in my mind, my very own bane,

Of heartache and pain, with nothing to gain.

No words said, yet many thoughts shared,

Of what could have been, with nothing spared.

~ Oct 18, 2018