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I say shit like "If my memory serves me" knowing damn well it serves the dark lord
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listen I know going on /lgbt/ is probably bad for my mental health in the long run but where the fuck else can I get reaction images like this
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If I see you use ":3" I just assume that you want to be bent over and fucked until you can't remember your own name.
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when u unholster the gas pump and expose its insert and u push it into ur cars hole and feel the hose stiffen with liquid and u hold down on the trigger watching your cars tank fill all the way up until its close to its breaking point and only then do u let the pump slide out and its still dripping and u plug ur car up to make sure nothing leaks out and u dont even clean the pump as u hang it back up for the next car to enjoy
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*four glasses of champagne in* i’m so horny i need to take apart some sort of electronic device
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