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Yellowjackets BAND AU

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Lesbian pattern recognition test

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she was such a cutie in the new ep ☹️

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In defense of Season 3 Lottie…

Season 3 Lottie is not operating from a place of malice or a desire for violence, she’s acting from a state of profound loss and desperation.

I think we have underestimated how pivotal the death of Wilderness Baby was for Lottie. Lottie had poured all of her belief, all of her hope, into the idea that Shauna’s baby (their baby) would save them. Every ritual, every sacrifice that led the group deeper into blind faith and further from reason was anchored in what the Wilderness promised her: that this baby had a purpose. That she had a purpose. When the baby dies so suddenly and meaninglessly, that illusion is shattered.

In that moment, Lottie is not just devastated by the loss itself, she’s devastated by the realization that the Wilderness, her lifeline, might not be real. She has to confront the idea that the voice she’s been hearing, the visions, the rituals, the sense of being chosen that she built her identity around since the crash, was just an extension of what her father always said: that she’s sick, that’s she’s “unwell.” The Wilderness gave Lottie a sense of meaning, belonging, freedom, and authenticity that she never had in civilization living under her father’s thumb. It gave her a self-image that wasn’t defined by shame, mental illness, or suppression. But after the baby’s death, that image disintegrates. She stops hearing the Wilderness entirely. She’s cut off from the one thing that ever made her feel whole. And in that silence, she spirals.

She allows Shauna to beat her nearly to death, not just as a way to let Shauna unleash her grief and rage, but also as a form of self-harm and punishment. She appoints Natalie, the group’s most outspoken pragmatist and skeptic of the Wilderness, as the new leader as a way of protecting the group from herself (and from the Wilderness she believes betrayed her).

This loss of meaning is what drives all of Lottie’s actions in Season 3. Season 3 Lottie is lost, directionless, and desperate to reconnect with the Wilderness after months of silence. Her faith becomes erratic and dangerous. She makes desperate attempts to reach out to the Wilderness through Akilah and Travis, and she’s so blinded by her desperation that she doesn’t recognize how much harm she’s inflicting upon them. She initially doesn’t want to vote Coach Ben guilty, but she senses a glimmer of the Wilderness’ influence in Shauna, so she raises her hand. And then, during the Coach Ben feast, she finally hears the Wilderness again when it tells her the scientists don’t belong. This is a shred of something after months of oblivion, and Lottie is so euphoric with that feeling of reconnection to her purpose that she doesn’t hesitate to kill Edwin to maintain it.

Season 3 Lottie isn’t acting with maliciousness or hunger for power, she’s desperate and terrified. She is in the dark blindly reaching out for light, and when she finally finds it she will not let go. Lottie doesn’t relish in violence or bloodshed, these are just means of protecting her friends. She truly believes she is protecting the group. She is not acting from a place of self-indulgence or preservation. I actually think most, if not all, of her actions are entirely selfless (while being misguided and ultimately harmful). Her actions are still incredibly harmful and wrong, but Lottie is not evil.

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there is something about the way shauna experiences KNOWN trauma in the wilderness. everybody knows her fucking business, down to her fallout with jackie over jeff, jackie's death, her pregnancy & miscarriage, her relationship with melissa.

and the way lottie experiences UNKNOWN trauma in the wilderness. the interiority of what she's experiencing is incomprehensible to other people. they don't know what tf is going on with lottie & they don't have the competency toward mental health to suspect how deep it goes.

and how regardless of their traumas being KNOWN versus UNKNOWN, they both deal with people looking at them and fundamentally misinterpreting what's going on inside.

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every time someone claims jj as straight an angel loses her wings

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hi! 🦌 about me:

i’m elsie, 19, she/her, lesbian

i’m in loads of fandoms but mainly yellowjackets and criminal minds

other fandoms include: dr who, wwdits, torchwood + loads more!

i enjoy writing so send me requests <3

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baby seal jj 😓☹️

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guys, fanfiction isn't enough anymore, i need to be IN criminal minds.