neonspectrumdreams

[neonspectrumdreams]

Starizard.

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lavender agumon in file city

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rainbow typhlosion

Made this in photoshop today. Took about 5 hours.

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While I think we have enough evidence to say habitual, procedural (learned behaviors), and episodic memory are compartmentalized in Dissociative Identity Disorder (and this is likely a neuropsychological phenomenon,) I suspect that associative memory (and possibly to a lesser extent semantic memory) are not compartmentalized and are why triggers in DID (and other dissociative disorders) are so volatile and such a foundational part of how alternate identities are accessed. This would represent a neuropsychiatric process, with psychological and neurological factors contributing. One way this could be explored through neuroanatomy studies against a control group without trauma.

Thoughts?

[neonspectrumdreams]

Depression facts. Found these interesting so I made this.

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solar ninetales.

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pokemon crystal

Probably my favorite Pokemon game of all time tbh.

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system thoughts again

We are still learning to function as subsystems with communities within.

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Neon Lugia. A good look for Lugia, for sure.

Check me out on my new Cara account:

https://cara.app/phosphorescing

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We made a community for furry artists to showcase their art and support each other. :3 💜🩵💙

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when you're plural, every game is multiplayer!

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I'm pretty liberal with blocking, tbh. I don't put up with people harassing me. I say no to bad faith social interactions; I leave them and never think about them again.

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How long did it take you to get diagnosed with DID/OSDD? It's a diagnosis that is notorious for being overlooked by doctors. I first entered mental health therapy at 4 years old and didn't get diagnosed until I was 25.

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I got Rebelle 7 and wanted to take it for a spin. It's pretty cool. I need to get the hang of the brushes still. Didn't even try most of them. I like how this turned out. Hisuian Typhlosion is such an excellent Pokemon. Beware of future Hisuian Typhlosions on this blog.

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Hisuian Typhlosion is one of my favorite Pokemon. Drew this in Photoshop in a few hours.

[neonspectrumdreams]

Thoughts on spravato therapy

Spravato therapy has been incredible; I am just now finishing one month of spravato therapy. It is a complete game changer. That said, it is not a cure (at least not for me.) But it works better than therapy/meds ever have for me.

Spravato helps with my depression. It helps me enjoy things. I also experience much more vivid emotions - both positive and negative ones (which I prefer to being constantly numb.)

The spravato has done something really interesting to my sleep. So I have a sleep watch that tracks light (NREM1 and 2) and deep (REM and NREM3) sleep. I have had two sleep studies in the last year and the results match with the watch - I have about 10 percent deep sleep to light sleep.

The average person gets fifty percent of each. Someone with narcolepsy has more REM sleep. I have narcolepsy, but due to repeated head injuries and trauma in my 20s and early 30s, I have very disturbed and fragmented sleep.

So according to the watch, since starting Spravato therapy, I get an equal amount of deep and light sleep. I could feel this change immediately without needing to consult my watch because I'd sleep through the night (!!! a thing I usually NEVER) do, and I started having these long dreams.

Although spravato is a dissociative hallucinogen, it appears to have an antidissociative rebound effect after it wears off. I have had alters that I cofronted with for years suddenly have moments of not being depersonalized wherein we can all access their memories. This has obvious benefits as well as obvious challenges; sudden knowledge of significant portions of one's life it's always an experience of simultaneous joy, despair, rage, fascination, and terror. There is always a sense of not being depersonalized when these events happen for us, of feeling REAL and as though the world around us is REAL - that is perhaps what makes these otherwise difficult moments into a positive experience that is absolutely worth it. Spravato has facilitated this beautiful experience for me, which I am eternally grateful for.

[neonspectrumdreams]

pastel leopard 3d render. blender is such a revolutionary program for allowing me to create this - and all at no cost.