never-is-permant

[never-is-permant]

“No podemos aplazar de vivid haste que estemos lists,” … “We can not put off living until we are ready,” from- if i tell you by Alicia Tuckerman.

Story trigger warning- hints at base, self-harm, and mental health .

I do not own nor did I create the words used as he title and inspiration.

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I watched her go by my window. Never seeming to take a day away from the places within her mind. Challenging every one around her with eyes of gold. As if she was daring those around her to try and battle away the demons she had captured within her skull, attaching them to chains of spikes and blades. 

She was the type of girl who spent her days running away, though her nights fighting with a blade. Turning those against her towards her side. Chaining them up, turning them against the darkness others tried to force upon her mind.

I watched her pass by my guarded eyes. Always stopping, just long enough for my mind to tell me that it wasn’t a figurement of my desires. Stopping and . . . Just looking. Sending arrows covered in bandages through my mind. As though she was trying to will me out of my home. Out of this safe place that  I have convinced myself is the only place within this hell ruled world, where they could not possible get ahold of me and my fears. Challenging me to scream to her what it was in this lifetime that scared me. Begging me to stop putting it all away in a locked box. To smash the window of glass and steal. Cutting my hands only to see that I bleed gold and sliver. Bleeding as the fog covers my vision. Bleeding as I understand what it was her eyes were trying to portray to me . . . To everyone. Screaming through silent lungs that she is truely living and we need to try.

Shooting weapons, not at us but to us. Using her demons- not as attack dogs but reminders. Reminders that she was once a little girl, troubled. Troubled by the men that forced their fists onto her skin. Troubled by the scars acting as a map across her hips. Troubled by her desires to put off fight for a moment of rest and . . .  And a moment of security.

She was the girl who decided to live . . .to fight before she was ready.

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-never is permanent xoxo

[never-is-permant]

Welcome to the place where the quotes from the stories i read become the titles for the stories i write.