obeymesideblog

[obeymesideblog]

Belphegor: I am offended. I am angry. I am very tired... so I'm going to take a nap, but when I wake up, oh you are in for it.

Belphegor, four hours later: How dare you?

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Satan: *reads the poem* Roses are red, that much is true,

Satan: But violets are purple, not fucking blue.

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Diavolo: Lucifer, thank you for agreeing to see me.

Lucifer: I didn’t. You just walked in here and started talking.

Diavolo: I don’t have time for a history lesson.

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Levi: I wasn't sure what kind of chocolates you liked so I got them all.

MC: Levi... There are like 300 boxes here.

Levi: I panicked, okay!! Valentines can be very stressful!!

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Mammon: What did you guys get in the yearbook?

Asmo: Prettiest smile!

Simone: Nicest personality

Satan: “Most likely to start a bar fight”

Beelzebub: “Least likely to start a bar fight, but most likely to win one”

[obeymesideblog]

Asmo: What do I get?

Satan: A night of fashion, mischief, mayhem, and possible death.

Asmo: Ooh, check, check, and check, not sure about that last one.

Satan: It won’t be you.

Asmo: I’ll get my coat.

[obeymesideblog]

Lucifer: *answers his phone* Hello?

Mammon: It's Mammon.

Lucifer: What did he do this time?

Mammon: No, it's me, Mammon, it's actually me.

Lucifer: What did you do this time?

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Asmo: Well, i can’t mansplain, manipulate or manwhore my way out of this one, boys.

Satan: Manslaughter it is, then.

Simeon: No, absolutely none of that!

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Lucifer: When I die, I don’t want you to show up on my funeral.

Satan: I have to, the murderer needs to appear on the funeral of the victim to fool the cops.

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Mammon: I’m going to start a false crime podcast where I explain crimes that never actually happened.

Satan: I’m going to do the crimes you explain, forcing you into having a true crime podcast.

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Lucifer: For several centuries, I’ve done the best I could to raise you boys! Have I been perfect? No. Do I know anything about children? No! Should I have picked up a book on parenting? PROBABLY!

The brothers: *gives each other a worried look*

Lucifer: Where was I going with this? I had a point.

Leviathan: Sorry Lucifer...

Beelzebub: We love you...

Lucifer: Well I love you too!

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Why does anyone actually like Luke? He looks 10... It's gross.

I'm unsure why you ask me this question. Luke is one of my least favorite characters of the game.

I guess some people think he is cute.

I don't really think people are sexual interested in him.

[obeymesideblog]

Belphegor: Beel found out he could sneakily put post-its on people's backs without them knowing.

Belphegor: But he doesn't know they should say things like "kick me," so they all just have smiley faces on them.

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Lucifer: No one bothers me when I work.

Diavolo: I still bother you when you’re working!

Lucifer: Because we work together Diavolo.

Diavolo: Exactly

Diavolo: I have privileges

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*during an student council meeting*

Beelzebub: Do you feel like this meeting's gotten out of hand?

Belphegor: Nah. Feels normal enough for a group that's on 911's blocked caller list.

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Beelzebub: Jail’s no fun, I’ll tell you that.

MC: Wait, you’ve been to jail?

Beelzebub: Once. In Monopoly

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Great, now I have to play around 40 chapters Obey me to meet the new characters. (I spent a whole year only playing the events, because a new event starts like 4 days after the old one ended and I always used all my AP for the events...)