This just be my OC talking blog. Fuckin Sick!👌Header Art by @the-c0nquerer-w0rm
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being a GM is really fun because sometimes you can make your players go through some really traumatic Evangelion bullshit, but other times you can force them to go bowling for no reason
#I am going to DM my first campaigns (Caligula Effect Based)#also sequels to one another#I am going to put the players through the horrors that are the musicians and the fucked up EVERYTHING that led to them in this position#however special shoutout to cools for putting me and my Devil summoner/Marebito hybrid of a father through hell and back
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process of drawing an OC: - you design them - you get attached to them - their hair gets bigger without you realizing it
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love making a decision regarding my oc and instantly running to tell a friend I’ve made him worse
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Tag the OC that gets crushes easily
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Edgy/misc OC ask meme ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ
Send me a number and an OC, and I'll answer.
What memory would your OC rather just forget?
What's something about your OC that people wouldn't expect just from looking at them?
What is your OC's fatal flaw? Are they aware of this flaw?
When scared, does your OC fight, flee, freeze or fawn?
How far is your OC willing to go to get what they want?
How easily could your OC be convinced to do something that goes against their moral compass?
What's one way your OC has changed since you first came up with them?
Would your OC ostensibly be able to get away with murder?
Do you have a specific lyric or quote which you associate with your OC?
What's an AU that would be interesting to explore with your OC?
What is your OC's weapon of choice? Have they ever actually used it?
Is your OC self-destructive? In what ways?
If you met your OC, would the two of you get along?
How does your OC want to be seen by other characters?
Does your OC have a faceclaim? If so, who?
What is your OC's pain tolerance like?
What is the worst thing you have put your OC through story-wise?
Is your OC more cold and detached or up close and personal?
How does your OC behave when enraged?
Does your OC have a tendency to get jealous? If so, how does this manifest?
Does your OC have any illnesses or disorders? How do they handle it?
What character alignment would you consider your OC to be?
What emotion is the hardest for your OC to process? How about express?
What is an alternative life path your OC might have gone down? How different would their life be if they'd made those decisions?
What is your favorite thing about your OC?
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me when the human character loses their humanity while the non human character gains humanity

#OH LORD IT ABSOLUTELY IS AND NOW ITS NOT JUST NIKOLA#HI ASPHODEL#Mare!Rafa is SUCH a fucking cringefail MESS OF A BOY
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being a GM is really fun because sometimes you can make your players go through some really traumatic Evangelion bullshit, but other times you can force them to go bowling for no reason
#shoutouts to my DMs#y’all are brilliant#making my boy go through trauma and a half-having him relapse into multiple episodes-ONLY FOR ME AND MY ROBO BUDDY TO CONTEMPLATE#THE VIBES OF SHADOW THE HEDGEHOG#double shoutouts for making a vocaloid contemplate the sudden appearance of human emotions in him and going full ***GIRL WHAT***#BY DUNKING MONSOON METAL GEAR RISING AND FUCKING ***SEGATA MOTHERFUCKING SANSHIRO***#IN THE CAMPAIGN AS AN ALLY#TRIPLE SHOUTOUTS TO MY OTHER DM FOR MAKING JO MONEY FUCKING CANON MOFUCKIN I’M STILL WHEEZING OVER HER#AND MAKING THE DUMBASS LANDSHARK COMPLETELY LOSE HER GODDAMN MIND#Quadruple shoutouts to my Devil Summoner DM for not only giving my man Michael Langdon his first fucking W in a while after his son got#FUCKING SHIV’D IN THE FIRST MENTIONED CAMPAIGN AFTER FIGHTING THE DOPPELGÄNGER VERSION OF LONGINUS IN HIS HOME CAMPAIGN WITH THE PARTY#and the ib campaign has just been the old lady VIBIN
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"objectively physically attractive but in possession of negative rizz" is one of my favorite character concepts. i think it's so great when there's an absurdly hot person who's just a complete fucking loser. the mood is unsalvageable the moment they open their mouth kind of deal. you get no bitches because you're so sucks.
#this is just Michael#my absolute cringe fail of a man#literally takes so many fucking Ls I should just make the equivalent of Struggle Tweets or some shit for him lmao
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when making a character, u have to ask urself:
are they bloody?
will they ever be bloody?
is it their blood or somebody elses blood theyre covered in?
why are they bloody?
how drenched in blood are they going to be from a scale of 1-10, with 1 being ''barely drenched'' and 10 being ''so covered we shld ask where there ISNT any blood on them''?
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me when the human character loses their humanity while the non human character gains humanity

#WELP#I THINK ITS HAPPENING AGAIN#mare!Rafa is a special little man#AND GOOD LORD HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH NIKOLA MAKES ME AAAAAAAA#BUT I THINK THIS IS WHERE IT MIGHT BE GOING
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Tiny but full of fight
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making character playlists
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hey it’s okay. maybe you’ll feel better if you imagine your OCs in fucked up situations
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I think that more fanfiction should be written with the aim to tackle the original meaning of hanahaki. Because when the concept of hanahaki disease was originally created, it was intended to be a metaphor for suppressing one’s feelings.
Your feelings are this beautiful garden of flora inside of your chest. When you express how you feel honestly, you allow for it to grow freely. But when you hide how you feel out of fear of rejection, and try to make it smaller and smaller, the flowers become cramped inside of you, until you choke on your own feelings. Every flower you cough up is something you’ve felt, but refused to say.
The whole “dying” thing is intended to be more symbolic especially. You’re killing off bits and pieces of yourself and how you feel, because you’re afraid to express yourself.
It’s not really supposed to be, “The one I love doesn’t love me back, and I’m dying from it.” Rather, it’s more along the lines of, “Repressing your emotions is bad for you, and it’s better and healthier to express them freely, even when it’s scary.”
Which is to say that, one, the cure for the disease should be telling the person that you are in love with how you feel. How the other person feels about the person afflicted should have nothing to do with it, as the trope is meant to be about feeling your emotions unapologetically.
And that, two, it’s not an inherently romantic trope. Obviously, it has romantic applications, but it can be written for any situation where a character is hiding how they truly feel. This can include a refusal to address a specific trauma, a desire to indulge in something that they’re ashamed of, and even really practical things, like wanting to ask one’s boss for a higher position.
Although (as an aromantic person myself) I don’t agree with this conclusion about the trope, this application would also avoid people calling it arophobic. When the thing killing the character is a refusal to be honest with themselves, rather than an unrequited love, it’s on nobody’s hands but their own to save their life.
There are a ton of ways that this interpretation of the hanahaki disease could be applied in new and interesting ways in fanfiction, and I’d love to read what things people could come up with!
#hanahaki disease#I personally avoid using the more romantic one and instead tend to use it in a body horror sense when it comes to characters with really big#fucking feelings they don’t know how to approach#SO IM GLAD THAT IM ACTUALLY NOT USING IT WRONG WOO#at least somewhat#WOOOO
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hanahaki disease that runs on the rules of 'it'll get better when the sufferer makes peace with their feelings' (instead of placing onus on the crush or w/e) but the disease doesn't go away for someone even when their love loves them back because their self-loathing has lead them to believe they're unlovable, so they can't trust the other person is truthful and the flowers won't go away
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