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Anora's Final Scene
I've been thinking a lot about the final scene from Anora and trying to figure out what I think and feel about it. I just finished watching Jordan Theresa's video essay about Anora and intimacy coordinators, and she mentioned how disappointed she was in Igor's character having sex with Anora, and hearing that made me realize I feel differently.
The way I see the relationship between Igor and Ani/Anora is one of mutual understanding. They're both working class people just trying to make it, and being used by people richer than them. In that final scene, I appreciate that Ani is the one who initiates the sex, and while yes, Igor is a man and just goes with it, I think it's Ani that is so used to transactional sex that when he tries to kiss her, she like short circuits. Especially coming off the scene beforehand of them just kicking it on the couch in the mansion, where he says that he likes Anora better than Ani. Understandably, Ani has just been through some shit--a shotgun wedding and prompt annulment, and being a sex worker, has her boundaries up and wants/needs to protect herself. But despite all this, Igor likes her. And he's meets her and sees her in like the complete opposite environment that Vanya does.
Vanya meets her in the strip club, with all the lights and drinking and drugs, in this fantastical light, while Igor meets her kicking and screaming, acting brash without the facade that sex workers often put up. Despite seeing her at her worst, he still likes her.
That's why I find the ending scene so heartbreakingly...sweet? Something like that, but not disappointment or disgust. We really see Ani finally letting her defenses down and cry. She, of her own volition, decides to thank (?) Igor for being nice and giving her the ring with sex. Presumably, Igor is a normal dude that doesn't really mess with sex workers or sex so transactionally, given how he treats Ani and their conversation about Ani thinking he would rape her given the chance and he's like wait whut no why would I do that. So he engages in sex as he knows, an intimate act between two people that actually like each other, and I think that scares Ani because she is so used to not engaging in sex in that way.
But instead of being weirded out by it, Igor just holds her as she cries. I find that incredibly sweet. And as we've seen throughout the film, Ani doesn't really have anyone to break down to. She seems pretty distant from her sister, there's no other family seen in the film. When she's not at the strip club in the first half of the film, she's alone. It's probably something new for her to have someone that she can be her real ass self with. And after this whole ordeal of meeting someone you truly think can change your whole entire life, and then having that shatter in front of you so quickly, understandably she'd want to isolate because that's where she understands safety to be. But I think it's nice to see that there's someone she can see eye to eye with, and she feels safe enough to break down in front of that also just reciprocates. Without question, without needing to be compensated somehow. Just mutual support.
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Anora (2024) dir. Sean Baker

I have been wanting to watch this since I heard about it winning the Palme D'Or and all the video essays that had come out about it after it was released, so I finally bit the bullet and paid to rent to watch it on Prime.
I've been aware of Sean Baker since watching and loving The Florida Project so I knew going in that I was in for a high-energy ride. My initial thoughts and feelings are that I really enjoyed the over-the-top situation(s) that we find Ani/Anora in, but in all that chaos, finding quiet, humanistic moments that are the important points of connection that allow us to find the emotion in between all the craziness. I love finding the soft humanness in these gritty, loud, brash characters, that allows the audience to second-guess judging them; Ani as a stripper/sex worker, Vanya as this spoiled rich kid, the goons as paid muscle--we really get to find a commonality and relatability to the characters (to varying degrees).
The acting here is much of what has made this film so talked about. While the filmmaking is excellent, and this being Sean Baker's best work to date (not having seen his previous works in full, but here and there in clips), I love Mikey Madison's performance as this loud New Yorker that's not afraid to get in your face, and watching where and how she finds the subtle looks and beats that make you root for her as a character. Mark Eydelshteyn as Vanya, it's so fun to watch him wild out in a drug and drink induced explosiveness and then be equally wildin out in a destructive way. I love the slow melt of Yura Borisov's portrayal as Igor, how he's just kind of one of these rich guy's goons but by the end you feel like you maybe judged him too soon. All the side characters, the strippers, the other goons, the family, Vanya's friends, just add to the richness of the world and help ground the story in reality.
Re: Sean Baker films as modern fantasy-realism
I love how we see Ani as this strong, independent, hardened character that is doing what she needs to survive, and seeing how much of a facade it is, how much maybe she wants it to be just this face she has to put on until someone or something "saves" her. You can see it in her little looks at Vanya, that maybe this super rich hot young man may really sees something in her and she believes it. For a portion of time she really believes it. She wants to believe that Vanya really loves her. She reverts to the little girl who loves Cinderella, and it's watching that facade come down for her, ripping itself up and bursting into flames right before her eyes, that really humanizes the film for me. Watching the slow realization that this was all a farce, and that she must return to the life and reality she knows.
But it's in her connection with Igor, who stood up for her to the crazy Russian family demanding Vanya apologizes to her, who takes her home, who actually sees her.
I am writing this immediately after watching it, but I have heard about some criticisms that have come out from the sex worker community that I'd like to read/learn more about. I also heard that this is Sean Baker's nth film centered around sex work, and as a straight white man, I do think that warrants questioning further into. Like why does he feel so strongly about writing stories about them, and how (if it all) does he give back or support them outside of making work about them? Hopefully more to come. (When? Idk but sometime.)
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The Kids Don't Dance Anymore
I have been wondering why I've been feeling so bored of music lately. Until just very recently, I felt like there were no new music artists or acts that I really got into. Everything kind of started sounding the same and I couldn't feel anything from the music. And I'm working at the Portland store today, and on my walk here this morning I decided to listen to my Daly City BART playlist, and it hit me as I was listening to The Pack; young people aren't really going out to dance like they (we) used to so no one's really out here making BANGERS to get down to. Everything has been bedroom pop, hyper pop, rap but more for like sitting around smoking and not for getting hype. OR any music that I've tried to listen to (especially newer K-pop) has just sounded like it was made in order to be used for like a commercial or have like mass appeal. Which just turns me off because then it just feels like it was made as a tool for capitalism instead of because someone/a bunch of people felt the urge from the depths of their soul to make this one song.
It's been just in the last year or so that I've been getting into music again. I ended up really like Chappell Roan (honestly more gay pop with a bitch that can actually sang) and her music was so refreshing to hear especially since pop music before her was all Taylor Swift and like mellow and nice. Women in rap are DOMINATING right now, of course we stan Megan Thee Stallion in this house, but I've been starting to get into Doechii and I cannot wait to see where she goes. I've been obsessed with Raye for like the last week and have been listening to Escapism and Oscar Winning Tears on repeat. I saw her for the first time on SNL and was immediately impressed with her voice, and then I heard her again perform at the Grammy's, at which point I was like ok lemme listen to this bitch. And MY GOD.
That's another thing that has been missing from music; I miss women with just a big, rich, powerful SANGing voice. Of course I love that we've made room for all sorts of different kind of voices, but like fuck I love when a singer needs only a stage and a microphone and that's it.
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The Sex Lives of College Girls (2021)
While I did enjoy watching the pilot, I did feel like I had to push through every stereotype about young college freshman constantly slapping me in the face. And this is more or less my experience thus far in watching this show (I'm almost done with season 2), it getting more enjoyable (or at least more tolerable) over time. There are things in the writing I do like, but overall I feel like it's pretty trope-y and feels like it young characters written by older people. The way I keep describing it in my head is it feels like a millennial woman that is really obsessed with John Hughes films and other teen romance films of the 80s and 90s wanted to make something just like that except with female protagonists. And while I do appreciate the open way they talk about sex and dating, it feels a little after-school special and written in a way where it never feels like the characters are actually learning from their mistakes, they're just verbalizing the sequence of events that just happened and restating their feelings about it.
Another thing about the writing is the pacing of the show, which may be on purpose because this show kind of follows what was cool for like 2013 and are also half an hour long, but I feel like things happen so fast that feels like they're just trying to get to a resolution before the end of the episode. But I think with the advent of streaming and binge-watching, audiences have gotten used to spending more time getting to know the characters slowly and over time. In this show it's just like one shenanigan to the next. Which is fine for what it is! I just suppose there's a lack of emotional weight to some of the heavier things that get depicted that I wonder was the intention of the writer and they missed it? Or if it was written that way for some reason. Like finding out the guy you like and have been seeing and sleeping with actually has a girlfriend from back home? Devastating.
I do really appreciate the visual diversity in the casting (except for Nico because how is that Leighton's brother?!) I like the style and costume design it feels real (if not slightly exaggerated) to young women of the time.
Initial gripe with season 2 start with some of the makeup choices for Whitney. Sometimes it's fine, but I felt like her foundation color didn't match her, and her blush and lip colors didn't look good on her.
I feel that Mindy Kaling's internalized misogyny is really coming out in Bela's character, disguised as a charismatic sex-positive young woman that ultimately feels like "Ahh well men did it first so we're just doing to them what they've done to us for years!"
2/16/25
I have not gone back to finish season 3. It sucks because it's due to nothing else but the bad writing. The last straw for me personally was Kimberly having a crush on Canaan. It felt like it came out of nowhere, and was more of a reason to create some tension between the roomies and to get some time with Whitney inside the sorority house. Because then all of a sudden she doesn't like him anymore and quickly starts a new thing with the bisexual guy. It felt like they were writing it just to put these characters into certain situations, which felt like the case with everyone else. Leighton just up and leaving for MIT, Bela putting a pause on comedy (which she started so strongly with in season 1 that giving it up now just doesn't follow with her character and how hard she was going for it) to be an FAF, and Whitney feels like she's constantly just getting put into different dramas for the hell of it.
It started off well and seemed promising, and it was really cool to see some newer young female coming-of-age stories, but it feels somewhat stuck in the mid-2010s and I'm bummed with the direction the show went in.
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Sometimes I Think About Dying (2023) dir. Rachel Lambert

This was a nice foray for me back into indie films. Happily getting into using different resources from the library, I found Sometimes I Think About Dying on Kanopy and decided to give it a go.
I was really pleased to see the use of film language, as opposed to through dialogue, in the expressing of the feeling of depression and suicidal thoughts, through long takes and stationary camera shots, as well as the use of montage and editing. Like I really liked the shot of Fran staring out her window at work and seeing the crane being cut with shots of her feet lifting out of her shoes in tandem with the lifting of the crane. Another sequence I really like was when she was imagining herself getting into a car accident, the blow of the glass on impact and the papers in that room beneath the office flying up at the same time. This rapid succession of work, dying out in the forest, being in the car at the moment of impact, and then ending with her just gripping the wheel and staring blankly ahead...like girl I've been there and I see you and I stand with you.
It was also really refreshing for me, visually, to see a film shot on location. I was so geeked when I started it because we had literally just been to Astoria, and I kept thinking "Wow this looks a lot like Astoria." But I didn't want to just assume it was, maybe it was some other coastal city somewhere in the Pacific Northwest, or maybe even in the northeast. But I looked it up and I was right, which marks another thing I think about a film and turn out to be correct. (The other notable one was like 5 minutes into Throughbreds I thought to myself this feels like a play, and lo and behold, it was in fact based on a stage play.)
It really looks and feels more grounded in reality when not everything is on (what is clearly a built) set, or set on green screen. There's a tangibility that I think makes the viewing experience more seamless.
I enjoyed Daisy Ridley's performance as Fran. I liked how she found how to make Fran this loner type with a general aversion to getting close to people, without making that aversion based on a dislike or hatred of people. Like with my own depression, it's more about this shame around myself and my personhood (which is also evident in the writing, like when she asks Robert if he wishes he can unknow her even though, as he states, he doesn't know her). Not wanting, or perhaps being afraid or unwilling, to burden someone else with these feelings. And it was nice to see the slow and subtle changes in her character over the course of the film, I think it could've been disingenuous to be too happy and changed at the end. It would've been incongruent with her character.
The other performance I really enjoyed was the woman that played Carol, Marcia DeBonis, who I know I've seen in other things. Carol is warm and generally well-liked in the office, and is kind and speaks to Fran just like everyone else, despite Fran's cold demeanor. Which I think Fran takes to heart, because when she see's her towards the end of the film, even though it's been some time since they've seen each other, Carol still treats Fran like a friend, or at the very least a cordial colleague.
Marcia brings an up-front openness to her character that is in direct contrast to Fran, but in a way that shows Fran that even though they're not close per se, Carol can still be open and Fran doesn't feel affronted by it, and is instead sympathetic. I really liked the line where Carol tells Fran about her husband's stroke and Fran obviously feels sad about it. But then Carol mentions that it's ok that she didn't know because Carol didn't tell anyone. People can't know about your pain or hardships if you yourself don't say anything about it.
My one gripe with the film is the casting of Robert. I think a different (or better?) actor could have brought a little more nuance and sympathy to the character, but I chalk it up to maybe a lot of the casting budget going to Daisy and Marcia, and perhaps some relationship with Dave Merheje and someone on production.
Other than that, I really enjoyed this movie, and love getting back into films that remind me of a freer version of myself, that just wants to make weird little films that aren't necessarily Oscar-worthy or anything. Just quiet little films that I feel like need to exist for me and no one else. Art for my own sake.
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A Quiet Place: Day One (2024) dir. Michael Sarnoski

My first and foremost thought after finishing this film was "Wow this would've ate in like 2016."
I think oddly my favorite parts of the film were the parts with no dialogue or lines. In line with what made these films in the first place was how they created this really tense sense of danger and tension in the long takes and the sound design; it creates this really delicious feeling of anticipation that keeps us watching. But that's almost all this movie had (apart from the performances of the actors). I HATE how Lupita's character was just like I don't give a fuck about potentially losing my life to these terrifying aliens, I'm getting this goddamn pizza. Yes, she's a hospice patient, but you really want me to believe she was ready to just risk it all for some pizza? ESPECIALLY she had a cat! Have you met a cat owner? She would've at least tried harder to make it for that cat. And then no shit, that place is destroyed (like the rest of the city being destroyed wasn't a clue enough to think perhaps there isn't any pizza at this spot) and you walked from Manhattan to Harlem for nothing.
Also there was not enough in the relationship between Lupita's character and Eric to make me care or feel emotionally invested. Lupita Nyongo'o and Joseph Quinn (along with the other actors) are the only reason I hung out with the characters at all. Both are such lovely and present actors and because of their performances, you want these characters to survive. Also shout out to the DP, the acting and the cinematography is what makes this film enjoyable and fun and entertaining to watch. The writing is probably the weakest part. Like when Eric asks her a question, and she's like "Just read this," and hands him (forgot if it was her poem or a poem) a poem to read out loud. And I kept thinking "I see what they're trying to do here...but it doesn't really work this works better in like a novel."
It seems like there is, and will be, a flurry of movies in the coming year(s) with these top tier actors with excellent performaces, in these poorly written, substandard movies that studios are just pumping out in hope to make money, and these actors also need to work to live, so they do them even if they're not the best.
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Triangle of Sadness (2022) dir. Ruben Östlund

Triangle of Sadness has been on my radar since it came out. I was pleasantly surprised to see when I finally sat down to watch the film that it had won the Palm D'Or that year, so I knew I was in for something good. I try not to have any expectations going into a movie nowadays and hadn't been spoiled about the plot or anything like that, so nothing could have prepared me for how the events of this movie unfold. I had known enough to know that some part of the movie took place after some sort of shipwreck on a seemingly deserted island, so I was taken aback when the film started with some male model cattle call. Which in and of itself being referred to as a cattle call, and then you have a bunch of half naked dudes trying to sell their bodies for advertisements...I love how it comments on the illusion of wealth and how we have a hand in curating it. It sounds ridiculous to hear the guy with the microphone say it, but you know you exactly what he's talking about when he talks about high fashion brands versus easily accessible brands. Like we hear that, and are just like "Yeah I guess that's the world we live in, even though that's weird I guess," and continue to allow that to be acceptable.
I'm sure its audacious approach to speaking about different social and political issues lends heavily to its winning of big awards. And while that's all fine and dandy (I do agree with a lot of the sentiments expressed) what's it to say that he said all that, and we STILL live in this fuck ass world. What's the point? The film gets accolades and everyone (hopefully) gets paid because the films does so well, and then what? It's still a bunch of rich guys stroking each others' egos and not doing anything about it (as far as I know).
But alas I cannot dismiss the cultural impact that this film could have. A greatly awarded film gets people to watch it and ultimately it at the very least hopefully gets people to think about social structures and our complicity in it.
Anywho, back to the movie.
Performances across the board were excellent. Of course I love the Filipino representation, because to my knowledge they do make up a large portion of the cruise line hospitality force, and Dolly De Leon is phenomenal! Harris Dickinson ate that first part up, I was like who is this crazy man, and has this wild order of events, but throughout remains this weirdly insecure dude that's kinda submissive, it was delightful to watch.
I think I will go back and study just that whole exchange between the captain and the Russian guy.
But I loved all the little instances of the rich just being the worst, out-of-touch people; the old lady demanding everyone swim, the old lady complaining about the sails she said she saw even though there were no sails, the old couple that ended up being owners of a company that manufactures weapons used in military operations. This is kind of what I was touching on when I was talking about the Capitol in The Hunger Games, like toning down the visuals and movie fluff really allows for the absurdity and (frankly) evil nature of the system and all those that allow it to continue to be the focus, and to sink in in a way that stays with you and makes you think.
I really enjoyed the tone and visual language of the film. There's a understated sharpness to it that forces the audience to not get too comfortable and keeps it on its toes, and I found it engaging. I suppose I'll check out more of his films.
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per 2010s Teen Dystopian Films

Having just reread and rewatched The Hunger Games books and movies, I've been thinking a lot about that period of time in the early 2010s and the rise and fall of the teen dystopian film genre.
I'm thinking about how they recently, finally adapted Scott Westerfield's Uglies series into film, but as soon as I saw screen grabs from it, knew it was not going to be good. It had fallen victim to some studio thinking they could just stick to the 2010 teen dystopian film formula and crank out a hit, but that unfortunately led instead to it's downfall.
Then remembering about how one day I got curious and googled to see if Delirium was in development at all to be adapted for the screen, only to find out from reddit I think it was that it was greenlit for a TV series starring Emma Roberts (first red flag) and had just the pilot shot and then was cancelled. I don't think I was able to catch the pilot while it was available somewhere, but I saw screenshots of what they had and, was disappointed to see how visually it once again copied that 2010 style of teen dystopia films.
I think the problem is a lot in the world building and art direction. They make the settings too futuristic in a way that's honestly...kinda camp, which makes the horrors of living in a dystopia feel safely faraway from you the viewer. But part of the horror of dystopian stories is imagining and viscerally feeling how it would be to actually live in that kind of world, and if that world was your lived reality. Who would you be? Would you be different? Would you be so different from the current you? It's so easy to say "I could never participate in slavery!" but if you were white and lived in the 19th century would you really?
I think if they had set these stories in a more current and dressed them in a more familiar setting, the impact of the dystopian world would hit so much harder. Of course within reason, a lot of these stories include futuristic technology that could not exist right now, and that's where the movie magic comes in, but as much as possible it should feel like that could be the actual reality by physically basing it in a closer reality that we're used to.
With The Hunger Games in particular, rereading that story now as an adult it's evident that because of the way the source material was mishandled (perhaps too strong of a word), the impact and weight of the story and its characters (!!!) was diluted and diminished by Hollywood (and maybe society in general) underestimating the intelligence of young people. There's a lot more to be said (I now want to make a separate post about THG) but it sucks to think that there could've been real staying power in carving out a space for good young adult sci-fi and fantasy. But the industry chose instead to see the genre as a flush cash grab, and not an opportunity to make good, thoughtful content for younger people. As I'm getting into my 30s, I feel like being conscientious about what kind of world I (we) are leaving behind.
The story fresh in my mind having just reread The Hunger Games, the first thing I noticed that really bothered me was how made up they made Jennifer Lawrence look at all times. Katniss is supposed to be a poor, malnourished, scrawny kid from the wrong side of town. Particularly her hair, it was always perfectly braided and curled, like I am not going to believe that KATNISS, as she's written in the books, would put that much effort into her hair. Like the braid with the pieces hanging out and curled--that takes effort to do.
(I haven't read the books, but my suspicion is that similar things concerning Tris's appearance in the Divergent adaptation can be said. It can also be said about the casting of Joey King as Tally in Uglies, but according to discourse about casting in general on that film.)
Then the other thing that I really think had so much potential was the Capitol and how it was brought to life. Like if it was rooted a little more in reality (especially in 2009!!) and looked visually less cartoonish and exaggerated, it would've allowed for the true sinister energy of the Capitol to come forward, which I believe comes from the apathy and narcissism of its people and the blatant disregard they have of everyone in the districts. Taking more care in the portrayal of the Capitol population or like the prep teams would have served to show how even "nice" people are still culpable in maintaining the status quo upholding unjust, evil systems by complacently following whatever they're told.
I also think, on the heels of Twilight and its subsequent films, that there was far too much emphasis on the romance in many of these films that distracted from the dystopia, instead of heighten it as it could have. As someone who enjoys romance, I think it has a time and place, and in these stories I think it's beneficial to the story as a whole if it was used to enhance (the term I keep wanting to use here is flavor) the story as opposed to being the center of it.
All in all, I was a fan at the time forsure (duh I was literally within the target demographic at the time). But in retrospect it's interesting to be able to reevaluate these works that you so enjoyed at one point, and learn how to take what you still enjoy from it while also being able to acknowledge its flaws and/or shortcomings. So we can do better in the future. Like literally they fumbled the bag so bad, young adult sci-fi and fantasy could be doing NUMBERS if they just let the right people make their passion projects and not make it all about money (sigh).
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Nosferatu (2024) dir. Robert Eggers

This shan't be any kind of official review with the thought that other film scholars and intellectuals will read this. I'm just trying to get all my thoughts and feelings about the films I watch this year outside of my brain.
I thoroughly enjoyed Nosferatu. My first thought after finishing it was "Oh wow this is probably the most normal of Eggers' films." Which isn't to say that it was lacking in comparison to his earlier works, but it definitely felt like the most easily digestible to the average audience. That being said, I did talk to a friend about it (she's like your standard American movie enjoyer) and she was kind of put off by the sexual nature of Ellen's possession.
Which probably had more of a hand in giving this film it's eerie nature than any part of the vampire. Or, it could've distracted audiences from the horror of Count Orlok. When I think of the film now, I honestly remember more of Lily Rose Depp and the weird disciple than I do how scared I should've been of Nosferatu.
Which is actually a point of interest for me concerning this film; if the audience was more disturbed by the monster of the movie, or the sexual nature of Ellen's possession. Modern audiences have gone from taking sex completely out of movies, to ramping it up as a selling point, to now falling back into being mindful about sex in films. I think this has a lot to do with modern feminism and how people now are much more critical of how and why sex is depicted in film/TV and if it's exploitative in nature at all. Is the sex in Nosferatu exploitative? I want to say it's not, but would it feel different if the director was a woman and if Lily Rose Depp wasn't so beautiful? Would it have been more interesting if a man was the one under Count Orlok's spell? I will continue to ponder these thoughts.
Performances across the board were excellent. Willem Dafoe is *chef's kiss* and a welcome sight in an Eggers film. I honestly have not seen a lot of Nicholas Hoult's work; I first saw him in Warm Bodies, then learned he was on Skins, and have seen him throughout the years. I had to look through his filmography and kept saying oh I forgot he was in that (X-Men, The Menu) but he's great and I will continue to watch what he does. Aaron Taylor-Johnson and Emma Corrin are obviously amazing and on my radar.
Bill Skarsgard...I honestly only know his work when he's under a bunch of prosthetics (that being this film and It). I tried watching Barbarian but hated the writing and the premise (you expect me to believe a grown ass woman was just gonna share an Airbnb with a complete stranger, let alone A MAN) but want to see more stuff that he's worked on.
I found Lily Rose Depp to be a commanding presence on screen. There was a subtle ferocity in her acting and you can feel how present she is. The other performance I was particularly impressed by was Simon McBurny as the weird Count Orlok disciple. I think parallel to Ellen's connection with Nosferatu, Knock's unfailing and desperate loyalty to Count Orlok is, I find, equally as off-putting and eerie. The point of madness that it drives him to, which ultimately led to his demise, is nothing short of demonic (in the religious sense). And with that in mind, it's wonderful to see how present and committed to the moment McBurny is.
Overall a pretty solid watch.
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