openulysses

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Archaeologists of the future will dig up our links. Start with a word in Open Ulysses.

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How to show your Labubu to strangers: post your Labubu's picture on social media and add the post's link to Open Ulysses (for free!). Do it now, free slots are limited: https://ko-fi.com/Post/Chapter-I-1-Z8Z11J6H59

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Alone, you drift. Together, you fly. In Open Ulysses, each word you link pulls the project forward. Add yours — and feel the speed build!

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Spotted: The rare Hawaiian Werewolf — surfs by day, howls by night, and still finds time to add his link to Open Ulysses. Your turn: join the pack and leave your mark on the world’s weirdest web portrait.

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There are many strange things on Open Ulysses. Add yours!

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Add your art to Open Ulysses.

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Open Ulysses is full of wild stuff. Why not add yours?

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FBI Unveils New Privacy Policy: All Mentions of Trump in Epstein Files Replaced With ‘Covfefe’ for National Security

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a groundbreaking move to protect national security and the privacy of the President, the FBI announced today that every mention of Donald Trump in the infamous Jeffrey Epstein files has been redacted and replaced with the word “Covfefe.”

The decision follows months of intense deliberation inside the Bureau’s top-secret “Covfefe Committee,” established shortly after Trump’s triumphant return to office in 2025.

“We determined that revealing the President’s name in any investigative files, no matter how ancient or unrelated, could cause unprecedented damage to the nation’s collective Twitter feed,” said an unnamed FBI spokesperson, speaking under condition of extreme secrecy and occasional bafflement.

“The word ‘Covfefe’ carries with it an aura of mystery, dignity, and meme potential that ‘Donald Trump’ simply cannot match,” the spokesperson added, sipping an oversized MAGA-branded latte.

The newly redacted documents have sparked confusion among conspiracy theorists and social media sleuths alike, many of whom believe the FBI’s action confirms the existence of a secret “Covfefe Protocol” — a covert operation designed to protect the President’s image from prying eyes, shadowy journalists, and that one guy who always comments on Reddit.

Experts say the FBI’s move could set a precedent for future redactions.

“Next, we expect mentions of classified cabinet meetings to be replaced with ‘tremendous,’ judicial proceedings with ‘fake news,’ and all public records to be encrypted with endless tweets about golf scores,” observed Dr. Evelyn Hightower, Chair of Contemporary Political Communications at the Institute for Advanced Rhetorical Studies.

President Trump, when reached for comment, praised the FBI’s “tremendous job,” adding, “If you want to find out anything about me in these files, just look up ‘Covfefe’ — it’s going to be yuge.”

The FBI confirmed that should “Covfefe” ever lose its secrecy, the agency will consider replacing the President’s name with something even more impenetrable — possibly “Huuuuuge,” “The Wall,” or a rare Pepe meme.

*** If you liked the above satire, help us create more: buy a link on Open Ulysses. Painting a portrait of the world, one stroke at a time. Add yours today!

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We’re building a portrait of the world. Add your art link and let it become part of this community-driven canvas: https://linktr.ee/openulysses

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The Pope is fam — literally. Turns out he’s related to Madonna, Bieber, Angelina Jolie, Hillary Clinton and Justin Trudeau. Family dinners must be wild. 🍷👑 Got a weird connection to fame? Drop your link into OpenUlysses. History is waiting.