optipess

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Happy #NationalPizzaDay!Here,  celebrate with this related Optipess comic I made 13(!) years ago. Apologies if this strip made you super hungry.

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The Conjuring

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Factors of Authentication

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“EEEEEEEEEE”

It also supports voice recognition! Instead of hitting the snooze button, you can just scream the phrase "AAAAAaaAAAAaAA". Handy!

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Happy late #InternationalDogDay! Here, please pet these related Optipess comics.

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Everything Ends

This is the last Optipess comic (you should read). By which I mean, you should eventually save it for the inevitable end so it can live forever.

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Once again, happy Friday 13th!

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New Optipess comic!

“Last Will”

The remaining ashes were then promptly flushed down the toilet.

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New Optipess comic!

“Sea Revenge”

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Some humans lives later that feeble coin had wished himself into a solid gold bar. Inspirational!

Btw, I stumbled upon this comic (which I had almost forgotten about) by going to my own site and hitting the random button a few times. Go on, try it!

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New Optipess comic!

“Time Travesty”

The sad fact that no one traveled back in time to stop the production of The Tomorrow War is evidence enough to prove that humanity will never invent time travel.

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Happy Shark Awareness Day & happy Shark Week!

Here is an Optipess comic with happy sharks. 🤗💞🦈

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A Jar Too Far

Mmm, cookies! Later, during the autopsy, several chunks of chocolate chip cookies were discovered entirely fused with little Timmy’s body.

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It's my birthday! 

Here, celebrate by grabbing these phone wallpapers, available for all Optipess patrons. 

https://www.patreon.com/posts/53421414

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New Optipess comic!

“Cthulhu's Day Off”

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Optipess Archive Dive!

"The Birds" from 2008(!!) 

Support Optipess on Patreron: http://patreon.com/optipess

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New Optipess comic!

“X’tholo”

www.patreon.com/optipess