orphic-collective

[orphic-collective]

hello physically disabled person reading this. it is not your fault that your medical supplies are made from a lot of single use plastic and you can continue using them guilt free. your health comes first. thank you for existing.

[orphic-collective]

PSA if you are a wheelchair user with a partner who pushes your chair sometimes, you NEED to make out with your partner sloppy style in public so that people know ur together. If you dont do this your partner will be mistaken as your support worker for the rest of your life. Able bodied ppl actually cannot fathom wheelchair users and disabled people being in LOVE so you really need to wave it in their face

[orphic-collective]

"you don't owe anyone anything" You are a tar pit. Speak for yourself. I personally owe the cafe employees my dishes put away and my friends a listening ear and small scared insects a cup and a gentle trip outside. Hyperindividualism is a rancid infection borne of capitalism and willfully misinterpreted therapyspeak and I will defy it by continuing to be kind regardless of whether or not it benefits me personally

[orphic-collective]

every time a fandom dumbs down a very interesting nurodivergent character to “stupid dumb dumb child infant who’s smol and innocent and needs protection bc he’s just a baby” an angel fucking dies btw

[orphic-collective]

"drug-seeking behavior" woah the patient wants u to treat their ailments with medicine ...... thats crazy

[orphic-collective]

I know these people are incapable of feeling guilt or empathy most of the time, but I'm going to tell every one of them my mother died and it sucked. I don't care.

Maybe I'm trying to make sure a horrible, pointless, unnecessary death can have some meaning beyond my grief. That my mom's suffering can have some... reason.

[orphic-collective]

"Your love language is what you were deprived of as a child" actually no you're allowed to want, prefer and like things without everything tracing back to some dormant unprocessed trauma. You can just say you want to bounce on it without having to explain how as a child you always wanted - but never got - a trampoline.

[orphic-collective]

“my teenage child is so selfish” is an interesting thing I only see online moms say about their daughters. I’ve never seen one say it about their son. I think it’s because daughters enter the teenage years and begin developing critical thinking skills and independence and it enrages these parents who were using their kids as their own little therapists and unpaid domestic laborers.

[orphic-collective]

THE CURB CUT IS NOT THE PLACE TO TAKE TOURIST PICTURES OR SAY LONG GOODBYES.

[orphic-collective]

The fact that animals that care for their young will sometimes adopt others' lost or orphaned young to raise along their own is just funny to me. I know that it's all hormonal and there's no conscious thought involved in it, but the internal logic of it is so funny.

"Baby = success. More baby = more success. I have one baby and I found four other baby. I have five baby. I am being so fucking successful right now."

[orphic-collective]

“you would defend a trans teenager over a cis adult any day” yeah that’s a vulnerable child not your debate class ❤️ get help for your heart

[orphic-collective]

hate when I'm trying to just take a normal drink but it turns out I'm thirstier than I thought so I end up gulping it down like a goddamn cartoon characer. the indignity of water lust.

[orphic-collective]

Hey man, ahead of this heatwave I'm gonna go ahead and rip the veil off of something for you:

The reason American Southerners have the luxury of saying that 90 ain't that bad and it's not unbearable until it's 100 is 1) prolonged exposure to high temperatures over multiple decades 2) our mindset for these living conditions.

You don't have number 1, and you can't just acquire it, so I need you to adopt number 2 immediately. How do you live like a Southerner in the heat?

Don't be a hero.

Stay inside. Buy a box fan, put it next to a bucket of ice, and wrap your arms around it like a lover. Do not leave the shade under any circumstances. If a dude makes fun of you for getting out of the sun, don't get mad, just think of a funnier insult to call him while you flip him off and go stand under a tree.

Southerners love nothing more than to exaggerate and lie to each other. Like I think we got off on the wrong foot when you walked in on us saying things like "It was only 110, I didn't even take my damn jacket off" when really, last week it was 95 at 10 PM and we were on the bed buck nekkid in front of the fan moaning incoherently and praying to die. So yeah, we can take extreme heat. We also want you to think we can take ludicrous heat. You must learn to talk shit and then be a hypocrite and a coward in your actions, because this will serve you best.

It sounds like I am joking but I cannot express to you how much I am not. Do not fuck with Mother Nature, because that bitch will kill you. Take every opportunity to lower your body temperature and drink water, because that is what all of us in hot climates are doing all the time, and that is why we are not dead, even when it seems like we should be.

(And yeah, we do go through like two and a half ugly weeks in April every year where everyone wants to absolutely just goddamn drop dead because none of us have our heat tolerance back, but we must go to work anyway, which must be a crime. And yes, when it gets below 70 we really all do short circuit and cover ourselves in seven jackets, except for Shorts Guy.)

[orphic-collective]

A good rule of thumb for AI is "would you trust a trained pigeon to do this?"

"We trained a pigeon to recognise cancerous cell clusters and somehow they're really good at it" okay great, that's something that could plausibly be a thing.

"We trained a pigeon to recognise good CV:s and left it in charge of sorting through all our job applications" uh perhaps consider not doing that.

[orphic-collective]

STOP CENSORING YOURSELF ON THIS WEBSITE. FUCK SHIT SEX MURDER ALCOHOL DRUGS FAGGOT DYKE QUEER TRANS BITCH SLUT WHORE SEX SEX SEX SEX!!!!!!!!!!!

[orphic-collective]

feminism never taught me to hate men but it did help me realize that i shouldn’t prioritize them over women & it turns out that alot of men consider that to be hatred lmao.

[orphic-collective]

I'm over here like, how the fuck is someone privileged for having a wheelchair, if without one they are completely immobile.

How the fuck is someone privileged for having a full time caregiver, if they could die without the help.

How the fuck is someone privileged for having a school aid, if without one they're not able to be in school at all.

Maybe you're the privileged one, because you're able to live a life without requiring a wheelchair, a full time caregiver, a school aid, ever thought about that?