poufthebug

[poufthebug]

Chrysanthemum

Chrollo x Reader oneshot

TW: death and violence

Word Count: 5k

Description: In an attempt to separate yourself from the Phantom Troupe, you agree to tell Kurapika everything you know in exchange for your life. The only problem is that Chrollo is your boyfriend. Before the inevitable occurs, you plan to spend as much time as you can with Chrollo. How much time do you really have left with him?

"Hey, I'm going to be free for the next couple of hours. Do you want to meet somewhere?" You breathe in slowly to calm yourself down. Calling Kurapika isn't what's making you nervous. The whole time you were waiting for him to pick up, you were looking behind you to make sure no one was listening. You'd be dead if anyone in the Phantom Troupe knew what you were doing.

"Yeah, that's fine. Where do you want to meet?" You give Kurapika the location you had planned and check your surroundings once more. "That will work. Before you hang up, I have a question for you." You furrow your eyebrows and think over your answer for a moment. You know the longer you're on the phone, the more likely you are to get caught.

"Go ahead. Make it quick."

"Are you sure no one knows we've been seeing each other?" You thought it was a stupid question for Kurapika to ask. You told him before that you plan to cut off all contact if anyone figures out what's been going on. You are not going to risk Kurapika's safety.

"Yes, I'm sure none of them know. I've kept my promise."

"Alright. I believe you. I'll see you there." Kurapika hangs up the phone before you can say anything else. You pocket your phone and turn around to head back into the Phantom Troupe's hideout. As you walk through the entrance, someone comes into your vision, causing you to bump into their bare chest. You jump back in surprise and get ready to yell at them until you realize who you bumped into. It was your boyfriend, Chrollo. You quickly calm yourself down and give him a smile.

"I was just coming to get you," he says while wrapping an arm around you and returning your smile, "Who were you on the phone with? You were out there for quite some time." You didn't expect him to come and get you. You were thankful that he hadn't come out during the call. Who knows what he would have done if he heard you on the phone with someone that plans to attack the Spiders.

"I was talking to my friend Lisa. It's her birthday today, so I'm going out later tonight to celebrate. I hope you hadn't planned anything," you lie. Chrollo innocently tilts his head in confusion.

"Lisa? You've never told me about her. Want me to come with you?" He seems genuinely curious. You don't enjoy lying to Chrollo, in fact, you feel guilty. However, you have to lie to Chrollo in order to protect Kurapika.

"Sorry. I haven't seen her for a long time, and I really want to know what she's been up to. We need time to catch up. If you came, everyone would be drooling over you. Didn't you say you needed time to plan the next heist anyway?" He takes his attention away from you and looks at the troupe members around him. Machi and Shalnark are watching the two of you closely while the other present members are talking amongst themselves. Chrollo thinks for a moment then looks back at you with a small smile.

"I guess you're right. Let me know how it goes. I hope you have fun." Chrollo sits down on his pile of rubble then opens the book he was reading. You stand in front him and push his book down.

"You know I don't have to leave just yet."

"I assumed you would want to spend your spare time getting ready." He doesn't look at you when he talks. Instead, he holds onto the hand you used to push the book down and continues reading.

"You know, as the leader of the Phantom Troupe, I expected you to be a lot smarter. I want to spend my spare time with you. I'm not sure what time I'll be back." Chrollo looks away from his book and lightly pulls your hand towards him.

"Come have a seat then." His attention went back to his book, so you release your hand from his grasp and sit next to him. Your head goes on his shoulder as he turns a page. He puts his arm around your waist and moves you closer to him. The book he was reading doesn't look familiar to you and the words are long and complicated. If you weren't in the hideout with the other Spiders, he would probably explain the book to you, and if you found it interesting, he would read it aloud to you. However, since you aren't alone, you stick to reading with him silently.

As you both read, Chrollo lets you act as the page-turner while he holds the book and keeps you by his side. As he waits for you to turn the page, he lets his hand roam around your body. His hand goes up your waist then trails down your arm until he's at your hand. He plays with your fingers until you turn the page with the other hand. He then intertwines your fingers with his and continues reading. Other times, he brings his hand up to the nape of your neck and plays with strands of your hair, or he rests his head on yours and closes his eyes until he hears the sound of you turning the page.

Chrollo closes the book and drops his hand from your body once you reach the end of the chapter. "You should be leaving for the party now. You'll be late if you don't hurry along," he says while looking at your disappointed expression.

"I can stay for a few more minutes. They won't even notice if I'm late." Chrollo sets the book next to him and grabs your hand as he stands up.

"You told me you were looking forward to this party," he lifts you off the pile of rubble and caresses your cheek, "Do you really want to be late?" You groan while you wrap your arms around his waist and bury your face in his chest. He was right. You had to leave. Kurapika would probably freak out if you didn't come on time.

"I'll miss you." You tighten your grip around Chrollo's waist and look up at him. He smiles and strokes your hair with one hand while the other rests at your hip.

"I know you will. Now get going." You plant a kiss on his cheek then make your way out of the hideout, not forgetting to wave goodbye.

Chrollo returns to his place on the rubble and looks at the Spiders around him. "You two are really gross. You know that, right?" Machi says with obvious disgust in her voice.

"Oh, I think they are cute together!" Shizuku exclaims.

"You're going to follow them, aren't you?" Shalnark asks in his naturally cheerful voice. Chrollo nods his head, remaining silent. "Better hurry up, Boss! They'll be doing the doodle doo by the time you get there! Awe man, I should've stuck an antenna in their neck before they left!" Chrollo ignores everything else the Spiders say and gets up from his seat when he hears your car start. He is going to find out what you are up to.

After quite some time, he stands before the restaurant you planned to meet this mystery man at. Not only was this the place you were meeting the man at, but this is the place where you and Chrollo usually had dates together. It made Chrollo upset, but he would never admit that to anyone. He goes inside, trying not to bring attention to himself, and sits at the bar. He looks around cautiously until he sees you sitting across from a blond man. He doesn't recognize the blond, so he isn't anyone you told him about or introduced to him. Everything about this meeting was suspicious to Chrollo and it made him fume with anger. All he could do was wait until one of you began talking.

Either to his luck or his misfortune, Chrollo finally hears you say the words he had been dreading. "The troupe has been planning something." You look away from your plate and watch as Kurapika chokes on his food. Little to Chrollo's knowledge, you and Kurapika had made an agreement. If you gave Kurapika all the information you had about the Phantom Troupe and their upcoming plans, he would spare your life. However, if you told anyone about the agreement, the chain around your heart would kill you.

"Have you made any solid plans yet? Like the location or what the troupe will be stealing?" Kurapika asks in a whisper. His tone reminds you to take a quick glance around the restaurant before proceeding.

"Chrollo is going to call all the troupe members to Yorknew City for the auction. I'm sure you already connected those dots after what Hisoka told you during the Hunter Exam," Kurapika nods, "He plans on stealing everything on all five days. I don't know how he plans on doing that. He hasn't told me all the details yet, but I'll make sure to let you know when he does. The auction will be crowded. If you really want to get revenge for your clan, this would be a good time. Even if you don't want to take action, I heard a pair of the Scarlet Eyes will be there," you barely notice a slight change in the color of Kurapika's eyes when you mention his clan. He sits back in his seat and closes his eyes. When he opens them, they are back to their original color.

"Thank you for telling me this. I'll make preparations. Let me know when you have more information." You smile at Kurapika and open your mouth to tell him something else, but you're interrupted by the sound of a glass breaking across the room. You shift your attention over to the bar and watch as a tall man in a suit storms out of the restaurant. Droplets of blood fall to the floor, letting you know that he was the man who broke the glass. For a second, the man reminds you of Chrollo, but it couldn't be him. He was still at the hideout, wasn't he? You couldn't help but find the man familiar.

"Why are you helping me, Y/N?" Kurapika breaks your train of thought and you bring your attention back to the blond in front of you, forgetting the man who caused the commotion. You hadn't expected him to ask such a bizarre question. It took you a bit to find an answer.

"I'm not entirely sure why I've chosen to betray the Phantom Troupe. I'm just tired of causing so much pain and chaos. I want to change," you respond hesitantly. Kurapika continues to stare at you, trying to find more to your answer.

"What about Chrollo? Aren't you in love with him?" You grimace at Kurapika's question.

"I do love Chrollo. I always have. I know that betraying the Spiders means I'm betraying him, but I can't live like this anymore. I want to be happy. I want to put an end to the Phantom Troupe's destruction. You saw what they did to your clan. I'm not saying I'm not happy with Chrollo and the Spiders. I enjoy the time I spend with them. We just don't share the same future anymore. I want to get married to Chrollo and live in a house together. I want to start a family. I can't do that with him when we are Spiders. I'm in love with Chrollo as a person, not his job as leader of the Phantom Troupe or his past choices. I don't even like my own past choices anymore." You sink back into your seat and close your eyes for a moment before looking back at Kurapika.

   "Thank you for doing this for me, for my clan," Kurapika tells you, "but are you sure you'll be able to live without Chrollo? It sounds like you really love him." You smile sadly at the thought of all the time you spent with Chrollo.

   "I'll be fine with the memories. I'll be able to move on," you pause, "eventually. Actually, Chrollo and I have made quite a few memories in this exact restaurant. We had our first official date here." Kurapika looks at you with surprise.

   "Really? Are you sure being here now won't tarnish the memories you've made together?" You shake your head.

   "I probably won't be able to come here again once they figure out I've betrayed them. I like to think of it as, I don't know, a final goodbye to this place." Kurapika nods his head to show he understands what you mean. You look around the restaurant one more time before placing the cost for your meal on the table. "I don't have anything else to tell you about the auction plans or the troupe. I'll call you the next time we need to meet."

   "Thank you again. Remember the promise you made and the consequences." You nod in response and stand up from your seat. You say goodbye to Kurapika and begin making your way back to the hideout.

   When you return to the hideout, the sun has set and everything is dark except for the few candles that illuminate the area around Chrollo. A few Spiders watch as you walk into the room, but most of them ignore your presence. Chrollo keeps his attention on the book in front of him and doesn't bother looking up until you're standing in front of him. You place a hand to his cheek and bend down to kiss him. Chrollo smiles into the kiss and brings a hand up to push your hair behind your ear. "I'm sorry for keeping you waiting," you say as you pull away from him.

   "There's no need to apologize," Chrollo says nothing more. He keeps his eyes on your face and slowly strokes your cheek with his thumb. In the corner of your eye, you spot a white bandage wrapped around the palm of his hand. Your eyes widen and you grab his hand, gently tracing over the bandage.

   "What happened while I was gone? Are you ok?" Chrollo laughs at your concern and lifts your chin up with his other hand so you can look at his face.

   "It's nothing to be worried about. I burned myself on one of the candles." You stare at him, still concerned. Chrollo smiles at you and grabs one of your hands with his injured one. "I'm truly fine. I've dealt with far worse injuries. You should be well aware of that. A small burn is nothing to me."

   "Alright," you lower your hand with his and swing them back and forth, "Just try to be a bit more careful."

   "I'll try," he laughs, "Do you have anything planned for the next few days?" You shake your head, confused.

   "No, I don't. Why?"

   "Do you want to check into a hotel with me? We haven't gone anywhere together in a while." He isn't wrong. You and Chrollo have been staying at the hideout for the past few days because he has been making preparations for the auction in Yorknew City.

   "That'd be nice. I'd love to."

   "Perfect," Chrollo gives you a kiss then moves over, giving you space to sit next to him, "We can leave tomorrow in the afternoon."

The next day, Chrollo takes you to a hotel you've never been to before. He told you that the room would be a bit small, but he made sure everything was perfect for you. You grew to love times like this. After spending so much time at the dirty hideout and traveling, spending time at a hotel was like heaven. Staying at a hotel is also the closest you would get to actually living in a house with Chrollo. It makes you happy.

For this stay, in particular, you are looking forward to one thing, the bathtub. Traveling with Chrollo usually means quick showers and no relaxing. In his description of the room, Chrollo also mentioned that the tub would be able to fit both of you together. It's the perfect situation for you. Not knowing when you'll get another opportunity like this, the first thing you do when you get in the room is drag Chrollo into the bathroom and turn the faucets on.

"What do you think you're doing?" Chrollo asks in a joking tone. You roll your eyes and take off his coat, letting it fall to the floor.

"Do you even remember the last time you took a bath, let alone one together?"

"I suppose you have a point." Chrollo takes off your shirt and pulls you closer. His hands slowly trail up your torso and leave a trail of goosebumps across your skin. "Do you know how much I adore you?" One of his hands reaches your chin and he gently lifts it so you can meet his gaze. You lean in closer and smile.

"Why don't you show me?" Chrollo smiles back at you and moves his hand to brush away a loose strand of hair before lowering it.

"If we don't hurry up the tub will overflow." The disappointment on your face is evident and Chrollo loves it. You step away from him and begin helping him take off the rest of his clothes. He does the same for you, making sure to leave lingering touches in random places. When you are both completely undressed, he takes your hand and helps you step into the bathtub. You slowly sit down in the tub then help Chrollo lower himself behind you. He wraps his around your waist and holds you closer to his body. He silently watches as you lean your head against his chest and trace his jawline. He brings his hand to your cheek and presses a soft kiss to your lips.

As you pull away from the kiss you bring your hand up to his hair and lightly run your fingers through it. "Will you let me wash your hair?" You ask, your voice coming out as barely a whisper. Chrollo nods and kisses you one more time. A smile forms on your lips as you carefully bring water to his hair then comb your fingers through to wash away the gel. Chrollo watches you lovingly and closes his eyes when you squirt some shampoo in your hands. You lather the soap into his hair and massage his scalp. A small sigh of relief comes through his lips, making you smile. You press a quick kiss to his lips to let him know you're all done. Chrollo's eyes open, and he turns your body away from him, running a quick hand through your hair.

"It's your turn now," he whispers in your ear. He covers your hair in your shampoo and carefully massages the soap in, making sure not to hurt you in any way. You allow your eyes to flutter shut and tilt your head back in satisfaction. A small grin forms on Chrollo's face as he watches you unwind. Once he finishes with the shampoo, he rinses it out and places a few kisses along the side of your neck. You press your back against his chest and bring a hand to his cheek as he plants a few more kisses on your jaw. You turn back around to face him as he pulls away from you. You have him close his eyes and rinse out his hair for him. You watch as his hair falls to the sides of his head and brush a few strands away from his face. When all the suds are gone, you kiss the tattoo that rests on his forehead then lean down to kiss his lips.

You two continue to wash each other off and relax until the bathwater turns cold and you're both ready to get out. You unplug the drain as Chrollo steps out of the tub and grabs towels for the both of you. As you climb out of the tub, he wraps the towel around you and dries off your body. He breathes out and slows his motions. His focus moves from your body to your face. "You're mesmerizing." Your eyes quickly light up at his compliment. You lock your lips with his and rest your hand on his chest to balance yourself. One of his hands trails down to your hip and gently holds you closer to him. Once you move away to take a breath, you grab one of the towels on the sink and begin drying off Chrollo's chest.

"You know you aren't too shabby yourself," you tease. Chrollo grins and continues drying you off.

When you're both completely dry and dressed, you follow Chrollo out of the bathroom and crawl under the covers with him. He turns on the TV and flips through the channels to a random one you both like. You scoot closer to him once he puts the remote down. He wraps an arm around your shoulder and you lean your head against his chest. It's nights like these that remind you who your heart will always belong to. Even if you'll eventually have to go your separate ways, you'll never truly be able to move on.

You lose your focus on TV and begin mindlessly tracing the details of Chrollo's abdomen. Since he was always shirtless, it was obvious how muscular he was, but you never took much time to truly admire him. His body was amazing. Suddenly Chrollo takes in a sharp breath of air and grabs your hand.

"Stop, it tickles." Your mouth opens in shock and you lift your head up to stare at him.

"You, Chrollo, the leader of the Phantom Troupe, are ticklish? How do I not know this?"

"Most people who try to tickle me don't live to tell the tale. You're just lucky." You let out a stifled laugh in response.

"I promise I won't tell anyone about my discovery."

"You'll take it to your grave?"

"To my grave."

You bring your head back to his chest and turn back to the TV. You slowly lift your hand to continue tracing his abdomen, but he grabs your hand once more before you can even touch him. You throw your head back and let out the laugh you've been trying to hold in. Chrollo removes the arm around your shoulder and moves so his body is hovering above yours. The hand he grabbed is now locked together with his and pressed against the bed next to your head.

"Did you think I was joking about them not living to tell the tale? You don't want to be considered unlucky now, do you?" Your laughter comes to a stop and you take a moment to collect yourself before meeting his eyes.

"Maybe I do. Just a little bit."

"If you insist," Chrollo says as he lowers his face towards yours. You lift your head up to meet him halfway, but you're stopped by Chrollo's free hand attacking your side, tickling you mercilessly. You're thrown into a fit of laughter and can barely catch a second to breathe. You reach down and push his hand away, but he grabs that hand as well, locking it with his and pinning it to the other side of your head. He lowers his head again, your noses barely touching. "Would you like me to show you mercy?" You try to calm your breathing as you quickly nod your head.

"Mercy, please. I'm sorry I tried to tickle you." You laugh again at the fact Chrollo is ticklish. He smiles as he watches you laugh and peppers a few kisses on your cheeks before capturing your lips in a kiss. It's short-lived due to the fact you could hardly breathe, but wonderful nonetheless. Chrollo lets go of your hands and returns to his spot on the bed. You sit up and kiss his cheek before moving your head back to his chest, this time resisting the urge to tickle him. "I love you, Chrollo," you say in a sigh.

"I know you do."

The next morning, you wake up, and Chrollo is already awake standing at the end of the bed dressed in a suit with his tattoo covered up.

"Get ready. We're going for a walk," he orders. You quickly leave the comfort of the bed and get ready without any complaints. Going on walks together is another rare thing you and Chrollo do together. It usually requires him to not be busy and for him to wear something other than his coat.

Once you're dressed and ready, Chrollo takes your hand and leads you away from the hotel to a nearby path surrounded by all kinds of greenery. You don't see many people walking along the path, but Chrollo still insists you take the more secluded path with him. Again, you don't complain and walk with him down the path.

No one is walking down the path as Chrollo said, but you aren't paying attention to any of that. You're too busy looking at the breathtaking scenery. All around you are hundreds of flowers ranging from all sorts of colors. The trees are a vibrant green and the bright blue sky can barely be seen poking through their leaves. If Chrollo wasn't holding your hand, you probably would have forgotten he was even with you. You stop walking with him for a moment and, hands still together, squat down to look at the flowers. This group of flowers in particular is white. You wish you knew more about flowers so you could tell what kind they are. You reach a hand to one's petal and gently rub it with your thumb. It's delicate and smooth.

When you stand back up, Chrollo is already facing you with one of the flowers in between his fingers. He reaches out to you and gently tucks the flower behind your ear. You smile at him and wrap your arms around his neck. You lean in and press a kiss to his lips. Chrollo returns your kiss and slowly backs you up till your back is pressed against one of the trees. He pulls away and brings his attention to the flower behind your ear, carefully readjusting it.

"You look gorgeous today. The flower makes you even more so. Do you happen to know what kind of flower it is?" he asks, eyes still focused on the flower. When he looks back at you, his eyes are filled with sadness, but his expression remains blank. "It's a chrysanthemum. Sometimes they are used during funerals, especially white ones. It's very fitting for this situation." You look at Chrollo confused and stare at him, looking for an answer.

"I don't understand what you mean." Chrollo doesn't answer you. He continues staring into your eyes, occasionally looking towards the flower. Then it hits you and all color drains from your face. "You know?"

"My trust is sacred, Y/N. I thought you were worthy." Chrollo reaches to your cheek, the white bandage coming into your view, and gently holds you. You feel sick to your stomach as you connect more of the puzzle pieces.

"You were at the restaurant, weren't you? You didn't ever burn your hand. You cut it on the glass." Your eyes dart from Chrollo's face and his hand in panic, your heartbeat quickening.

"Not only that, but I heard your phone call as well. Would you care to tell me what you exactly have planned?" Chrollo's voice is empty and has no emotion behind it as he talks. His eyes are staring straight into yours, but you can tell he isn't focused on you anymore. The sadness you saw before remains in his eyes, unchanging. You wish you could tell him why you went to Kurapika, why you chose to betray him, but you can't. You promised Kurapika you wouldn't tell a soul. You would die if you told Chrollo.

"I can't tell you," Chrollo breathes out in disappointment and his hand lowers from your cheek to rest on your jaw, "I promise I would if I could."

"Your promises mean nothing to me now. You betrayed the Spider. You betrayed me." The words that came from his mouth scared you, but you knew this would happen to you sooner or later. Unless Kurapika's chains ended you or Chrollo, Chrollo's discovery of your betrayal would be inevitable. You accepted that.

"I'm sorry." Your voice comes out as barely a whisper. Chrollo's hand falls to your neck and he sets his other arm on the tree and rests his forehead on it. In the corner of your eye, you can barely see that his eyes have widened, and if you look at his chest, you can tell his breathing had sped up. The thumb of his hand on your neck slowly strokes your collarbone in a steady rhythm that didn't match his breathing. His eyes close for merely a second and then he returns to his position in front of you. Both of his hands move to cup your cheeks. He looks directly into your eyes.

"I loved you," he says. You could barely hear a hint of emotion behind his voice this time.

"I know you did."

"Did my love mean nothing to you?"

"It meant everything to me."

Chrollo's eyes well up in tears as his hands leave their place on your cheeks and move to your neck. His thumbs slowly pressed down on your throat and his fingers tightened around your neck. You try to take a few labored breaths, but barely anything comes in. His grip is too strong. The flower that had once sat behind your ear now fell to the ground unnoticed.

"I love you," you choke out, barely audible. Chrollo's fingers curl and press tighter around your neck as he hears you. Although your vision is becoming dark and blurry, you can clearly see tears trickle down his cheeks. You close your eyes, not wanting to see him cry anymore.

"I know you do." Chrollo's eyes burn with both anger and sadness. He knows he has to do this to protect the Spider, so he keeps his hands wrapped tight around your throat even though he doesn't want to. You don't try to fight Chrollo off either. You are fine with this ending. You knew the day you began dating Chrollo that you would never get your happy ending with him. You knew you would die before that ever happened. You also knew, deep down, that Chrollo accepted this twisted ending as well.

When consciousness finally slips from your limp body and the burning of your empty lungs fades away, Chrollo gently lowers your body to the ground and rests you against the tree. He picks up the flower that had fallen and holds it in his hand. He holds the petals in between his fingers as you did once before. It is soft and delicate, just like you were. He returns the flower behind your ear and slowly places his shaky hand against your cheek. The color from your once bright face is slowly draining away and your lips have taken on a shade of blue.

"I'll miss you."

No one knows he will.