presidentogekiss

[presidentogekiss]

"Have you seen my man? Tall, blonde and handsome with abs as hard as steel?"

[presidentogekiss]

I do think it´s interesting that when he is looking for Hans, the way he chooses to describe him to strangers is by noting how big he is.

Which did sound strange to me somewhat when I saw it, but if you think about it kind of makes sense: despite how much of a babygirl we like to play him as, compared to the average half-starved peasents of the period, he would be way taller, larger and more muscular than most.

So big is fair, he is the medieval version of a trained soldier, even if he doesn´t always act the part.

[presidentogekiss]

more kcd2 modern au doodles! Hans is a tennis pro and the devils pack show up to all his matches very supportive (and drunk) :)

(henry is playing geometry dash)

[presidentogekiss]

Discreet Service

I wrote this little smut thing a few weeks ago, but I finnaly had time to learn how to use AO3 lol. Let´s hope my first real old man fanfiction isn´t to bad!

[presidentogekiss]

I don't understand the fanfics and fanart that portray Hans as being embarrased by sex or by Henry acting sexual.

Not only would that be very out of character for him, it was him who made the first move on Henry

The only thing that seems to explain it is that ukes in yaoi do it...

[presidentogekiss]

So, did he? Flip that Flop?

I don’t know, man

[presidentogekiss]

bored lord

[presidentogekiss]

"C'mere, Blacksmith's Boy!" 🫳

Finished Version + Details under the cut ⚔️

Sometimes I have a fully fleshed out picture or composition in mind, sometimes I just want to catch a certain nuance or vibe of something.

A part which really charms me about Hansry is their banter and easy-going chemistry, which transcends both their friendship and romance. While Henry can be just as unhinged and bold occasionally, he tends (!) to be more composed and reluctant than Hans, yet visibly thrives in his Lord's zesty, fun and live-loving temper - with which he can brighten every situation. I wanted to catch just that. So here's them, with silly little smiles and impromptu touches of affection 🫶

[presidentogekiss]

You guys wanna help me decide on a light source/setting for this piece? First two are the options, the third is just the base for investigative purposes if you need it. I’m only leaving the poll up for a day so Godspeed!

[presidentogekiss]

Wake the fuck up, Henry. We've got a pizzle to yank.

[presidentogekiss]

Just realized there is a female NPC that offers to have a threesome with both Henry and Hans during the wedding if you did the miller quest.

Hans of course refuses, because he was still pissed with Henry at that point and wasnt ready for it, but its funny it happens. Someone should write a fanfic about it.

[presidentogekiss]

Kiss his scar tenderly 🥹

[presidentogekiss]

All this talk about the "Eiffel Tower Position" made me realize it would be the perfect position for our beautiful bisexual boys. Picture this: Henry and Hans, each on one side spitroasting a beautiful maiden, while holding hands and looking lovingly into the each others eyes, struck by how beautiful the other looks while in action.

We need more good MMF content. I should write something like this maybe...

[presidentogekiss]

[presidentogekiss]

A Mess

This is my first attempt at writing some fanfiction (at 26 years old no less!). I honestly never thought I would, so much so I don´t even have an Ao3 account. But this game really inspired me to write, so I wanted to give it a shot. I´m sorry for any gramatical and spelling mistakes (english spelling will always be one of the greatest enemies of anyone learning english as a second language lol). I hope it´s not too bad, and I accept any feedback! If this becomes a habit I´ll figure out a more pleasent format hehe.

____________________________________________________________

Henry groaned a little, something between a growling badger and a baby deer. He was experiencing a very strange sensation at this very moment.

"You know, I was a little worried this wasn´t going to work, you know? I did this plenty of times on wenches, but I never tried this before in a man. I´m glad to know it works! - Hans said, in his usual cheery tone, as he went back to suckle Henry´s nipple.

It was clear he was being honest in his experience in the matter, because the movements his tongue made on Henry´s poor pap were full of intent and technique. Henry´s body felt it could melt as Hans slowly sucked on his chest, all the while slowly stroking his member under the heavy furs they were both in.

Of course, Henry wasn´t completely unexperienced in the activity. He had suckled on many a maiden´s tit. But he always thought that they allowed it mostly to indulge him, not because it felt particularly good.

But apparently, his body was way more sensitive than he had expected. He bit his lip and growled slowly with pleasure, and it seemed like Hans enjoyed hearing that, as he held Henry´s body even more tightly beneath the heavy furs that covered them, and he felt Hans´ own hard member pressing against his leg.

"Was this the objective of this 'hunting trip' all along, my lord?" - he said sarcastically - "So you could use me as a bed warmer? We barely caught more than a few hares today." - He was quite enjoying what Hans was currently doing with his mouth, but he couldn´t resist the urge to provoke him.

Hans took his mouth out of Henry´s poor sensitive nipple and looked up at him with his characteristic mischevious smile: "Of course not. We came here to take down a few stags. We´re not going home without at least a few trophies, I assure you! But it´s also very nice to be able to enjoy your company without any prying eyes nearby. A win-win!"

"Aye. And also because you enjoy fucking in the woods!" Henry provoked. "After all, isn´t this the same place you bought that girl Karolina? I sense a pattern."

"I do not! Well, maybe a little, heh" - he conceded with a softer smile. "It´s just so nice to feel the fresh air, isn´t it? No walls, no expectations for me to remember, just me and my very favorite peasent in all the lands" - he said as he laid his head on Henry´s chest.

It still felt a bit odd, he had to admit. Him and Capon. Not bad, but odd. He didn´t know the correct way to act around Hans sometimes. How does one treat a male lover, anyway? Like a typical courtship with a fair lady? No, that didn´t feel right. But it also felt strange to behave like two regular mates. Still, Capon wasn´t wrong. The furs were very soft, the candlelight was pleasent, the weather was calm and Hans´ body warmth was quite pleasent. He hugged the taller man tighter around his chest.

"So that time that we ran into those soldiers, the ones from Sigsmund´s army. Before Suchdol. Was THIS a part of the plan back then too? To seduce me like you did Karolina?" - he again provoked with cheeky smile.

Hans looked at his face and answered in a somewhat embarased tone: "I mean, not REALLY. At least not counciously. I really just wanted to spend time with you. I just thought, way in the back of my head, that maybe, after we got properly wasted, maybe, just maybe, SOMETHING could have happen. Some happy acident you know, that we could choose to forget the next day if needed. So as you can imagine, I was properly miffed when those fuckers showed up"

For some reason, when he said those words, Henry´s heart sank a little. The... thing that happened to them at Suchdol was very unexpected. He was caught quite off-guard for a second in fact. But hearing what the other man was saying made him realize how unlikely it was to happen at all. It could have simply puffed out of existence, like gunpowder without a flame.

And while he knew it would have made the current moment a lot less complicated, he felt sad at that idea. The idea of not having what they have now, even though Henry didn´t even properly know how to classify it, made him really sad.

"Well, no need to waste the opportunity a second time" - he said looking at the blond man´s face. He turned so his body and Hans could face each other directly, and kissed him softly, which Hans greedily accepted.

"Dully noted, my friend. I shan´t contain myself any longer" - he answered in between kisses, and gripped Henry´s body tighter. And it was a tight grip. Hans was a very fit man, the purest example of a warrior, and he could sense all of his muscles under his hands as he gripped him back.

Their bodies were now tight around each other like a knot, and their members were rubbing against one another and leaking, creating rather slippery and pleasent sensation, as they begun moving faster and faster.

"H-Henry, Fuck, I´m, I´m gonna..." his voice begin stuttering, as he struggled to form sentences.

"A-Already? T-That was quick" - he was also very close, but he couldn´t help but get one last barb in - "I hope Sir Hans isn´t so quick with the wenches in Kuttenburg. They´ll talk!"

"F-Fuck you, cunt" - he smiled from ear to ear and put his hand behind Henry´s neck, and pulled him for a kiss.

As they were kissing, Henry could feel his member throb harder and harder. And then suddently, he felt the orgasm come strong and hard like a punch, and he covered both of their chests with his cum, followed soon after by Hans.

"S-See? I won, hehe" - he said in a breathless voice, their bodies covered with fluid that belong to both of them, with no way to separate one from the other. A veritable mess!

"I guess you did, hehe" - and he kissed the other man. It was a confusing mess, ALL of it. But it wasn´t an altogether unpleasent mess, and Henry of Skalitz was happy to have made it.

[presidentogekiss]

"Anything for you, My Lord."

[presidentogekiss]

people who draw hans at least as tall as henry MWAH MWAH MWAH MWAH MWAH MWAH