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I'm going to *remembers suicide jokes are detrimental to my mental health* quit my job and start making shoes for American Girl Dolls
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Emily Dickinson, "If I can stop one heart from breaking" // Disney, Lilo and Stitch // Becks_RyLynn on ao3, "How the Light Gets In" // Jessica Darrow—Surface Pressure // The Hunger Games (2012) // The Other Boleyn Girl (2008) // Lin Manuel-Miranda—The Reynold's Pamphlet // @throwitinthelake 's tags on this post // @lucidloving // see 2
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Who can convince their parents to let them go grimdark?
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today’s my birthday! 🍾 so with my birthday powers i am making it also kris deltarune’s birthday
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I absolutely love how weirdly specific the notes are about these random concept art characters, it’s pretty funny and kinda makes them feel more real. Like why do I actually care about some of these guys like they’re someone’s ocs or something (which they technically are ig)








Also that “wakes up at 6pm and goes to bed at 9am” inkling is literally me I’m ngl
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me when i see a cat: CAT! cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat
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working with little kids is so dangerous. you get one kid who has a unique way of speaking & then spend the rest of your life with an internal monologue like “me’s go bathroom?”
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I didn’t take many photos this weekend, but you can enjoy this one that made me laugh.
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baking vids like this make me die laughing every time like I know what will happen before the video finishes but it's just so funny to me
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"Hello, my name is-"
My piece for @spectrumobligatozine.
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So apparently Tumblr ate my original post about this but:
A couple weeks ago I’m going to get lunch and as I open the fridge, my mother attempts to communicate to me that any chicken currently in the fridge is ok for people to eat, because the chicken that was intended for the dog to eat has been used up.
What she actually says is, “That’s human chicken.”
After taking a minute to process all horrible implications of the phrase “human chicken”, I decide to go a different route and hold the tupperware of chicken out to my sister, saying, “Behold, a man!”
This was evidently the wrong choice, as it meant I had to explain to my parents who Diogenes was, thereby cementing the incident in their minds and leading to me, just now, opening the fridge to see the following incredibly cursed image:

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