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guest etiquette

don’t ask “can i bring anything?” say, “i’ll bring a side or something sweet, any preferences?”

never show up empty-handed. some ideas: flowers, wine, a jar of local honey, chocolate, homemade jam. literally anything, doesn’t have to be expensive.

if you bring flowers, make sure they’re already in a vase.

if you bring wine, it stays, opened or not.

hosts are usually underfed. bring a little something just for her. a croissant, a coffee, anything.

don’t show up early unless you’re being useful. lighting candles = useful. waiting around the house = not

stay off your phone entirely. if you must check it, excuse yourself quietly.

shoes off.

tend to the room energetically. if someone’s being left out, invite them in. make outsiders feel welcome.

compliment the invisible effort. the way the napkins were folded, the playlist, the glassware.

if you loved one of the host’s dishes, ask for the recipe. highest form of flattery.

always make conversation with the children. “how old are you?” is boring. ask their favorite dinosaur or snack combo.

don’t be the one to gossip. bring good energy.

say a proper goodbye to everyone in the room.

text a thank-you the next morning.

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“Out of your yearning the silence shapes a name.”

— David Bottoms, from “Slow Nights in the Bass Boat,” Otherworld, Underworld, Prayer Porch (Copper Canyon Press, 2018)

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Natalie Díaz, from “Isn't the Air Also a Body, Moving?”, Postcolonial Love Poem

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Missionary because I want to make out with you, look in to your eyes, cover your face in kisses and watch your tits jiggle each time I thrust in you.

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You, me and that breeding kink of yours.

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November 15th, 2023.

Queuing this for next year (2024). I wanna see how much I’ve grown and moved on. One thing about me, once I’m over you, I’m FOREVER done with you.

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If you like my name why don't you moan it?

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sometimes i fuck you in my head

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— November 10, 1917 / The Blue Octavo Notebooks

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Bedroom, Living room