recovery-saved-me

[recovery-saved-me]

I needed to see this :) time to spread it to others who may need it too!

[recovery-saved-me]

How to Tell Your Friend That You Need a Break From Supporting Them

When I worked at a mental health crisis centre, I couldn’t believe how many people came to us, not because of their own problems, but because they were so lost in a friend’s pain that they couldn’t take it anymore. I saw a lot of people who were so worn down from helping someone else that they couldn’t sleep, eat, socialize or focus at work or school. They were consumed with guilt every time they put down their phones, went to sleep, or dared to enjoy themselves and have a good time. All because they had no idea how to set boundaries.  Helping your friends through a tough situation is a wonderful and noble thing to do, but it only works if you’re mentally in a place to do so. If you’re dealing with issues or mental illness of your own, you’re not always capable of being someone else’s shoulder to cry on 24/7. And that’s okay. Sometimes, you have to put yourself first. You can’t help someone else if you’re a mess yourself. You can’t save a drowning person with a sinking ship.  Telling a friend that you’re overwhelmed and you need a break is one of the hardest things you’ll ever have to do. Honesty is the best policy - don’t go radio silent on them, or avoid answering their messages. Be honest about how you’re feeling, and what you need from them. If you’re stuck on what to say and how to start the conversation, here are a few suggestions. Feel free to copy them exactly: It’s really hard for me to admit this, but I’ve been feeling like I’m on the verge of a breakdown lately. I love you and I care about you, but I need to take some time to take care of myself for a while.  I’m really concerned about you, but I honestly don’t know how to deal with this and I’m worried I’ll say the wrong thing. I really think that you should talk to a professional about this.  This is hard for me to admit, but I have a lot going on in my life right now, and it’s getting to be too much for me. Would it be okay if we talked about lighter stuff for the next little while?

You deserve more support than I can give you. I think you need to tell a close family member or professional about what’s going on. 

It seems like every time we talk about this, things are worse for you. I’m worried that my advice isn’t helping you at all, and I think you should talk to someone more qualified than me. 

I’m really worried for your safety, and it breaks my heart, but I can’t keep you safe all by myself. Would it be okay if we told someone else what was going on? 

I’m sorry, but I can’t answer my text messages 24 hours per day. I really want to make sure that you always have someone to turn to if I’m not available. Are there some other people you would trust with this? I can help you tell them, if you’re not comfortable doing it by yourself.  I hope these suggestions are helpful - best of luck to all of you, and make sure to put your own mental health first when you have to. 

[recovery-saved-me]

You know what? It’s really like that sometimes.

[recovery-saved-me]

a comic about someone who gets a visit from the reaper a bit sooner than expected, but has someone whos been waiting for them 

Hey, do you like my art? Help support me and buy me a coffee! ko-fi.com/zipper ❤️

[recovery-saved-me]

[recovery-saved-me]

the secret here is that everyday is one a good day for a good day! 

[recovery-saved-me]

So I was taught a lesson in how to get rid of a migraine in 30 seconds and omfg listen my migraines don’t go away ever but I was shown what part of my body to touch and like???????????????

It’s witchcraft????????? Like I would be burned at the stake if I lived in ye olde days knowing that information?????

What the fuck??????

[recovery-saved-me]

I got 1 task done today. I emptied the big trash can in my bedroom. That's one less fork to deal with.

I have severe executive dysfunction. I've been dealing with it by having myself do one small task a day. So far it's helped a lot. By doing it this way my brain doesn't freak out trying to tackle everything at once.

I got my inspiration for it from this Donald Duck comic:

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whenever I’ve had a particularly bad day my friend will ask me what my favourite colour is because he knows that looking for the exact photo of the colour will distract me from whatever shitty thing happened that day

I hope you all have someone like this in your life

[recovery-saved-me]

Could you kindly reblog me? I'm trying to start a conversation RE women and absent mothers as I never see this being discussed, only absent fathers. I want to be able to start passing on some advice and tips to other women, to let them know they aren't alone in this. Hopefully younger women than myself will have some of their questions answered in a way I didn't. Regards - R2YM

This is actually something incredibly relevant to me, I’ll have to look through your blog. If anyone else is interested, here you are.-Mod Brooklyn. 

[recovery-saved-me]

I feel like i will never find anyone who loves me, i want a boyfriend but i know it will never happen. Especially now, and i also rly want a good group of friends but thats not gonna happen either :/

Hey, I just want you to know that life is constantly moving. You aren’t going to be in the same place you are now in a year, and thats totally ok. You might meet someone you click with like no one before in six months and won’t be able to imagine life without them, just like how you can’t imagine life with them now. You keep living life and things will fall into place eventually. I can’t give much advice on how to put yourself out there but get to know what you’re comfortable with, what works for you, and do what works for you. I hope everything goes the way you want them to.-Brooklyn

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I'm 29 yo female, dating a 32 yo guy. And All of it is so new to me..I never been with anyone. I kinda forced myself to deal with my extrem intimacy/anxiety issues with the help of my therapist. We went out 7 times, for about 2 months..he wants me to go to his place for a sleepover. He knows I need the pace to be slow (I didn't tell him i'm a virgin) but i'm still worried that I wouldn't be ready for anything sexual and he would get discouraged by me. I'm afraid ny pace will dissapoint him

HI! I just want you to know that you have your pace and your boundries for a reason. If he gets discouraged by the fact you aren’t ready, he should either talk to you about it like an adult or deal with it himself. You don’t owe anybody anything and no one should expect you to do something that could potentially harm you for their own comfort. You’re doing your best to take care of yourself and in the end, you know whats best. You know whats ok for you and if he cares about you he’ll understand. I hope this was reassuring, my main point is to take care of yourself before worrying about other peoples needs. I don’t know how long ago this was sent, but I hope everything turns out the way you want it too.

-Brooklyn

[recovery-saved-me]