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Sighs...

OKAY SO LIKE, I may be getting a little Bro Strider pilled so hear me out right. I have first hand experience with shit parents, extremely shit parents even (thanks dad) so this isn't coming from a naive bitch who doesn't know what abuse is. It's dawned on me that this bastard man basically doesn't think for himself anymore and any thoughts he thinks are his just belong to this fuckass puppet monster man that lives in that apartment with them.

To be totally candid here I'm starting to see this as a pretty decent example of the cycle of abuse, of being so groomed and brainwashed into a certain way of life, a certain manner of thinking, that questioning it sounds fucking dumb to you and things are easier this way so why would you? Because deep down you KNOW facing the truth would suck ass and you were mentally never taught how to do that so it's scarier than going mano a mano with ten sharks.

Do I feel bad for the guy? Absolutely not, I don't feel bad for past me either with the shit I've done to drive people away, that was fucking deserved and if anything it's what brought me peace. HOWEVER, I am getting a little bit more fascinated with these concepts I've seen floating by my field of vision of some impossible alternate universe in which that man somehow made through all the bullshit that is the game and is now completely falling apart at the seams because he doesn't have some entity to tell him how to live anymore and he has no idea who he is, his identity is practically non-existent and his only family despises him and like, what the fuck would you even do in that scenario? How do you convince a broken man like that that the pettiest and yet healthiest thing you could still do is to just say 'fuck it we ball' and pick up the pieces. Because I do think that if that man were not mind controlled every day of his life and had y'know, his own space, his own interests, etc he could just be big chillin'. Fuck it, go full power of friendship disney movie schlock, force that man into social situations but he's cuffed to the radiator just in case, ya gotta earn the freedom to pick stuff from the charcuterie board first Brosef.

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I know I'm officially "old" because I was in a call with some friends we brought up dutch ovens and it became a convo about our favorite cooking pots...

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Ahem. Regarding the hypno Bro/Dave asks...

HypBROsis. That is all.

How fucking dare you come into my inbox and be funnier than me

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They deserve to be awful middle aged men together

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(resending bc I'm a fuckin dumbass) actually Dave accidentally hypnoing bro is hot too. Dave does it as a prank and it works. Is enjoying the control he has. (until maybe he says something stupid that makes bro fuck him and bro won't stop... But Dave this is your fault, you can't blame him...)

Waow! An anon!

Here's the fic that fits this exact scenario!

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been repeating this in my head all day

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Um… hi.. runs away and dies

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show me your motivation

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nothing will make you think "i have got to get weirder" more than finally feeling comfortable enough around other people to admit to interests of yours that you think make you a freak and a weirdo only to realize with a combination of embarrassment and relief that you're like a normie to them

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do you think that hurt

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Dave who loved Dirk so much. But slowly he starts to act weird. He starts to change. Sometimes he sees shades and reflections of Someone Else, someone he's terrified of even now

And then Dirk Ascends and he sees all the Splinters All At Once in his face, him included.

They'd had plans. They'd had hopes. And Dave throws up one morning and he panics because this New Dirk is Wrong and he doesn't know what would happen to a kid growing up tied to him.

So he runs away. Backwards, forwards, sideways. He has all the Time in the world. But Ult!Dirk is always nipping at his heels, wants to know why he left, doesn't Dave love him? Where's all the promises? Always clawing at Dave's Narrative and the little shimmer of something Else that seems to cling to Dave.

You know what I'd love to work at, at some point?

Pregnant!Dave running away from Ult!Dirk

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Ok. Ok. Since we're talking about Alpha Dave preg now. So he's drunk (Or high) one night, right. And Dirk (Or Bro, I'm a sucker for guardiancest) fucks him. ADave has zero memory of this, doesn't know that a condom was never used, and he also doesn't know why his chest is getting so sore or why his belly is swelling up. And he keeps going into work and everyone else there obviously notices, it's kind of hard not to when he's getting so big, but nobody ever mentions it and ADave takes a good while to realize what's going on

I'm also a sucker for the trope of "Why am I gaining so much weight? What is happening?"

But I'll do you one better:

He doesn't show. At all.

For the first five months, ADave doesn't show, doesn't have any symptoms. A little bit of swelling, he throws up every now and then, but considering how he drinks he's like eh, typical morning, whatever.

Meanwhile, Bro/Dirk who are acutely aware can just see it. They can feel it.

Suddenly they're at his side all the time. Stop smoking. Stop drinking. A "meeting with executives"? No, stop doing coke.

And it's making ADave super pissy because "What the hell man!? I have to practically beg you to pay attention to me before and now you won't leave me the fuck alone, get OFF my ass!"

It gets nasty and tense, especially since ADave is technically in withdrawal too.

And then one day he wakes up and BAM

Big tummy. Big, leaky tits. He's gasping and panting trying to get out of bed but he gives up and calls off.

He chews Bro/Dirk a new one because "Why the fuck didn't you say shit!?"

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You know what I'd love to work at, at some point?

Pregnant!Dave running away from Ult!Dirk

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stridercest preg prompt?? aroo??

alpha dave knocked up would be kinda banger.......their relationship having been a long kept secret, his brother seeming to act as his weird overprotective body guard. once dave starts showing enough they make plans to keep him inside, managing to keep the press off him for the time.

hes officially nested in, to bros relief, and towards the end of his pregnancy hes spending most days cooped up in bed, groaning about his pains and thickening body, complaining about his "ruined figure" that he "clearly hates" here and there. hard to keep that act up when hes already lactating some, having to pump his swelling tits near daily, which he fails at hiding for very long through stained shirts out if denial. his button ups and suits, socks and tight jeans have long been a thing of the past, opting for snug tshirts and loose pj pants. .. ...... twins maybe even ???

dirk is incredibly normal about it all and so am i

Alpha Dave would be the whiniest motherfuxker of them all.

Are u kidding? He can't fit in his designer suits anymore. He can't wear his Armanis. His Givenchi perfume makes him gag. His gold wrist watches and rings don't fit either because he's bloating.

He is miserable, he is snappy, he is irritable. But then Dirk looks at his growing belly, at his gross, leaky moobs, hugs him and cuddles him and has this look of love and adoration he swallows it all up.

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Re: Pregnant Dave

Imagine he's a few months in and he's starting to grow out of his clothes to a noticable degree but Bro tells him not to get any new shirts or anything because he thinks it's hot seeing him stretching out all his shirts. Alternatively, maternity dress shopping

He'd be so cute! Grumbling and complaining, trying to hide away the growing bump. He'd be so embarrassed at how bigger it's making him look.

But he also feels a weird inkling of pride when Bro/Dirk hug him from behind and rubs his stomach. Snug around his midsection.

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reading Hikaru ga Shinda Natsu (The summer Hikaru died) and like... What is (alpha) Dave strider doing here? Why does he have a hamster? I just met this guy and I don't know what he's called yet but he's gonna forever be dave for me <3

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