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duck duck goose!

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i have final destination premonitions all the time but instead of seeing death i see all the possible liquids i could knock onto my laptop

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engaging in a high risk behavior (lying back down after my alarm already went off)

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and there was no border between sky and sea | print

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real sadists understand that you can torture The Character simply by forcing them to live with themself

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hate when I'm trying to just take a normal drink but it turns out I'm thirstier than I thought so I end up gulping it down like a goddamn cartoon characer. the indignity of water lust.

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Yes your blorbo is tortured and pathetic and slutty and pretty and suffers more than jesus and all that but never forget that your blorbo is, first and foremost, a loser.

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before you stab someone: THINK!

how can you make it Tender?

how can you make it Homoerotic?

how can you make it Implicitly intimate?

how can you make it Noticeably a metaphor for sex?

how can you make it Kind of gay?

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Bringing back the pain machine. ❤️

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Wow i made this suchhh a long time ago and ive finally decided to finish it hahah

Have sum dragon krs 🥳

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you wake up one day and every single person in the world is in some frantic rush to end a time loop apparently, but you haven't been in a time loop and it's your first day so you don't know what to do you just go to work while wondering if you're gonna get stuck in the time loop with everyone else tomorrow. then the next day comes and everyone's celebrating cuz they finally fixed the time loop apparently. you always wanted to be in a time loop.

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many will tell you that the dog motif is passé and cliché and overdone . don't listen to them. keep chaining that fictional man to a fence

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White Star's ghost: my plan was supposed to be fool proof! I spent a thousand years building my forces and gathering strength! How did you manage to defeat me?!

Cale, throwing money at him like salt: with the power of friendship, justice, and cold hard cash.

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The last unicorn died in the Berlin Zoo in 1908

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my mom's in a pokemon go battle right now in the other room saying a whole shonen protagonist speech

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Accidentally wore matching outfits to The Horrors today