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So uh, yeah, totally meant it when I said I would be back on here, but things happen.

Things have been a little better, though. I've managed to pull myself out of bed more, and Adam's been helping as much as he can, which usually means shitty movie dates with mediocre takeout, but having him here is more than enough to take the edge off everything.

The shaking in my hands has been getting to me, though I guess a couple dumb scars and tremors is better than getting literally torn apart.

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I know I haven't posted in a while, I'm sorry, things just haven't been going too well.

I was doing better, went out more often, even saw Scott's shitty band a couple times, but someone saw me once and knew who I was, or used to be, I guess.

And they got nervous about getting caught and made some horrible game to justify getting rid of them, and I just don't know what to believe anymore.

I don't have anywhere else to go, and I can't just leave him, I love him, but I can't be the reason more people die.

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I'm debating trying to leave the house more. It still feels risky, but I feel like I look different enough not to get recognized?

Adam mentioned something about a show next weekend, I think it's his friend's band? Not really sure, but it might be fun at least.

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Breakdown canceled, actually.

Remembered about shitty pop punk and that headphones exist, so my boyfriend can't bully me about it.

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Looking in the mirror is so strange now, it's like she died back there too.

I hate his shitty ideology, but maybe I really was reborn, I'm not really sure anymore.

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I feel like I'm losing it, what do you mean I'm sitting here on my blog trying to talk to anyone else while they're planning how to "not kill" someone on the other side of the wall?

Life sure is something, I guess.

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oh im so glad to hear that youve acquired the cat!! what does she look like? its a bit basic, but naming pets after their coats is always a fun idea if youve got nothing else :]

Me too, it's nice having someone there all the time. She likes perching up on my shelf and watching when I'm on my computer, so I think she's starting to warm up a little.

And she's sorta like a tabby and calico mixed together, if that makes sense? She's got the black and orange patches, but they've got stripes mixed in and stuff.

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Is it kind of sad that my best friend is a cat without a name who won't let me pet her?

I think she just needs to warm up to the whole "being in a new place" thing, but I get it.

Anyways, name ideas would be appreciated, I've got nothing so far.

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Somehow, Jigsaw Thanksgiving is still better than with my family, even if it's just eating takeout and trying not to make eye contact with John the entire time.

The whole "What are you grateful for" thing sure was something, though.

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So, I may or may not have snuck a "friend" into the house-

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hiii franz !! i just wanted to see how you are all doing :] good i hope :]

( also you should totally get the cat methinks. im definitely not acting as the devil on your shoulder !)

I'm doing alright. It's been pretty quiet, but that's better than the alternative at least

And maybe it'd be fine. I mean, I'm the only one who lives here full time, so it shouldn't really bother anyone, I don't think.

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Thinking about talking John into letting me have a cat

I could just sneak one in, but that's probably not the best idea, I think

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Went ahead and updated my info/lore part of my intro post cause it was kind of nothing before, just wanted to let yall know :]

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Dude movies made stockholm syndrome seem so much more interesting than it is-

That's like, half a joke, but seriously, it's insane. Anyone got any suggestions to block out Amanda and Mark's bitching all day?

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Franz! Questions for you, about your romantic life:

4. does your muse find any specific features particularly attractive?

5. what is your muse's ideal first date?

6. would your muse kiss on the first date?

Forward much?

Kidding, but I guess the main thing I look for in guys is just being interesting. Not usually "trapped in a torture bathroom and made to work for my now evil murder landlord" interesting, but like, anything is better than nothing.

As for dates, I usually like simpler ones where you can actually get to know them outside of annoying small talk. Like when me and Adam went on our first date, we just went to a record store, which was really nice besides him making fun of most of my music taste-

And absolutely not, especially if it's not someone I already know.

[Link to original game]

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So.... turns out I was not home alone and Mark does not enjoy being woken up to Kraftwerk at max volume.

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I got some questions for you Mr. Miller!

🎈 - what is something you've created and/or accomplished recently that you're proud of?

🩵 - what do you fantasize about the most often (generally/sexually/etc)? are there any people that are significant to or that you can see in this fantasy and why?

Oh fun, love questions-

It's not like, a huge acomplishment, but I finally got around to decorating a little the other day. Nothing too fancy or anything, just put up some of my old posters, but it's something. Turns out living in an ikea showroom gets really fucking boring after a bit, who could've guessed? I get that he's dying and stuff, but John has no interior design skills at all.

And I mean, it's probably not surprising, I just wish life could be normal, y’know? Get away from all of this, move in with Adam, adopt a cat, shit like that.

It's not all bad, I guess. I don't think I would've met Adam otherwise, no rent is nice seeing as work is out of the picture now, plus everyone is weirdly cool about the whole trans thing.

Still, it would be nice to know my only friends (?) aren't killing people to "help" them.

[Link to original game]