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you ever wonder how many people you’re in the “we’re friends but i would kiss you if you asked” club with

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british summer is here.

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when an animal doesn’t like me it really impacts my self esteem 

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people talking about their sexual experiences and u r in the corner like

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thank you mr. President 

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@ihatejonarbuckle Jon has a vibrator in him

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funny story

at the beginning of my freshman year of high school, I heard about how much money the drug dealers at my school were making so I decided to get in on that. I didn’t have any weed to sell so I put some oregano into bags and sold it to kids saying to was weed. by the end of the semester I made like $500 and to this day no one from my school has caught on to the fact that I’ve been selling them spices from my mom’s cupboard

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my kink is a happy n fulfilling relationship