sconeboi

[sconeboi]

Day 19!

[sconeboi]

fkcujucking perfection.

they’ll fall in love and here’s the bottom line– our trio’s down to two!

…I like to think that this was canon 

[sconeboi]

hey dudes i’m bACK because tHIS FUCKING THING HAPPENED

[sconeboi]

in a heartbeat

length: 1.8k

type: flufff

warnings: none!

Carry On / In A Heartbeat crossover!

If you have not seen the short film In A Heartbeat I definitely recommend checking it out, link here

thank you to @alwaysfangirly for being an amazing beta (yet again!)

SIMON

I practically sprint through the halls of the school. I have to find Ebb. I’ve seen her clean up massive amounts of rubble with Nonsense. I know she’ll know what to do.

Agatha’s choked-up voice keeps ringing in my ears. Goodbye, Simon. Goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye.

It was the most powerful I’ve ever seen her. She seemed to just appear in front of me, her wand already whipped out and ready to go. She must have been practicing for a week. What to say. What to do.

“In a heartbeat!” she had cast, pointing her wand at my heart. We’ve learned about this spell. Rarely used, because it can destroy relationships. Makes your heart beat out of your chest if you’re truly in love. Or, I should say, a cartoon-like outline of it (an actual heart shape would be terrifying). You can see the shape of it pump through your skin. Trixie used it on Keris that day. A little heart literally burst out of her’s chest and wouldn’t let go of Trixie.

When Agatha used it, nothing happened. My chest had stayed still. Agatha’s brow furrowed. “Goodbye, Simon,” she said. And repeated it sternly when I called after her.

But her milky, water-like magic is still swimming around in my chest. And it’s starting to get hot. Fast. Boiling, even. I jump over a small shrub and sail through air, as if my magic had momentarily boosted me up.

“Nonsense!” I say, just for kicks. The grass around me suddenly grows a foot taller. It must have been trimmed with magic.

Another shooting pain of heat rolls over my ribs. And all at once, everything goes cold.

Baz walks across the courtyard, on the path that leads to the classrooms. He’s reading some textbook with one hand and fiddling with his wand in the other. His hair is slicked back, but a small, jet-black piece falls right out in front of his face.

And that’s when my heart starts thumping.

What the fuck. What the actual fuck? I can see the outline perfectly through my Watford jumper. I try to press it back in, but the fake little spelled heart refuses to quiet down.

Baz is headed by way, so I leap into a nearby bush and listen as his footsteps make his way past me. I roll out and leap into the nearest tree to see if I can get a better look at him.

Why is the sight of him making this thing go completely mad? I study his hair, his skin, his eyes. It’s a nice feeling; staring at Baz without contemplating the different ways he might kill me someday. I push up on the tree branch and crane my neck to see him better, but I hit my head on the branch above me. Baz looks up, noticing the loud noise,and I dart behind the trunk. My heart’s going wild, beating so quickly and so loudly that I know Baz can hear it. I pray, I beg, I use all of my magic to hush it up. It works slightly, and finally I hear his footsteps continue on.

As soon as I relax, the skin on my chest seems to magically rip open, and something warm and soft falls into my hand. It’s a little heart in a cartoon shape, complete with a face, stick-like arms, and beady, blinking eyes.

Without warning, it darts out of my hands and points toward Baz eagerly, right out in the open. It darts back to me and grips my hand, nearly pulling me out of the tree. I pull back. It pulls harder. Eventually it lets me go and goes flying, right into Baz’s hand, knocking his wand to the floor.

I practically screech as I run, until I’m inches behind Baz. He hasn’t even noticed the switch yet; he’s too engaged in his book. I’m not sure what to do, so I make a grab for the heart, and in a split second it zooms off.

I’m holding Baz’s hand. My real heart flutters. He looks up at me, bewildered, and we both pull back immediately.

“What the fuck, Snow?” he says, snapping his book shut. As soon as he does so, I see the little heart dancing on top of it.

“I’m sorry!” I say as I jump up and grab blindly around Baz, following the blur of pink. My leg wraps around his, my hand jolts past his head. And somehow I land with my arms around his neck, my chest against his, so close that I could practically kiss him.

I feel the heart wriggle around in my hands, so I push away quickly and run.

“What the fuck was that?” I hear Dev call as he strolls past. Baz responds something inaudible. I'm too far away to hear, but I doubt I even want to.

BAZ

“No clue,” I tell Dev. “Thinks I’m trying to end him again, probably.”

“So he goes for the lips instead of the throat?” he replies, smirking.

“Apparently so.” I pick my wand up from off the ground. “Who knows, he might be gay.”

“Ha! The Chosen One, queer? Hilarious.”

“See you inside, Dev.”

“Merlin, Baz, lighten up a little.”

I look over my shoulder to see that Snow is out of sight. Simon Snow just held my hand and almost kissed me. It was as if he wasn’t in control, like a spell was forcing him to reach all around me, just to make my knees weak.

As I walk into the classroom, I feel something graze the top of my head, but I don’t think much of it. I dust off my hair for bugs and find nothing. But as soon as I step in, something wacks the back of my head and pushes me to the floor. I look up to see a little heart-shaped creature, and I immediately understand the situation

But there’s...there’s absolutely no possible way...

The heart swoops right up to me, cooing like a dove and nuzzling my face. Snow bursts in looking panicked, leaves in his hair and mud smeared on his trousers. His face is frantic, searching for his little love personification. He spots it and nearly jumps on top of me, grabs the heart’s tiny stubby arms, and tugs. But it won’t leave my side. Before I know it, the heart grabs onto my finger and pulls. Hard. I can already tell that it’s not letting go.

People are starting to whisper around us. Dev’s stifling a laugh; Niall’s in the corner, glaring. They all recognize that cartoony heart figure. They all know exactly what this is.

“Snow...is this...is this the Heartbeat spell?” I ask him, stuttering.

“N–no!” he says. “No, it-its not!” His face has turned completely beet-red out of embarrassment. Blood is rushing to my own cheeks.

“Simon...” I start.

“Shut up,” he whispers, looking panicked. He turns his face away and tugs as hard as he can on the little heart.

We both flinch at the same time as a loud crack rings out. It shoots down the middle of the heart and splits it in two. One half falls in my hand, the other Snow takes with him.

“Snow!” I call. “Wait!” But he’s already out the door.

SIMON

The sun is just beginning to set as I sit under the damned tree I fell from earlier today. The broken half of the little heart rests in my hands, heavy as a rock. I’ve sorted out a couple of things since I’ve been here, watching the grass grow.

First of all, I’m in love with Baz. Which I didn't realize until now, but that must be why I spent all those years obsessing over him.. Only it wasn't because I thought he was plotting, it was because I… liked him.  I couldn’t accept it until I met his eyes when we were both holding onto my heart. But I'm not gay. Nothing's making sense anymore.

When I met his eyes...they were so cold. Angry. I had made a fool of him in front of his friends. He wanted nothing to do with me. So he broke my heart.

Tears start to form in my eyes, so I try to blink them away. Then suddenly I hear a rustle of leaves.

When I turn around, I see Baz standing behind the bushes, staring right at me.

“Did you come over just to mock me?” I say, trying to make it sound as if I wasn’t just crying.

“Snow...” He makes his way over and kneels down in front of me. “Let me fix this.”

“W-what?” I stutter.

Baz reaches for my hands but I pull away hesitantly. I look at him, tears beginning to flow again. He gives me a reassuring half-smile, and my stomach does a flip.

He takes my hand holding the piece of the split heart, then holds out the half he kept. “All you need is love!” he casts, swaying his wand around. I recognize the spell; it’s usually used for cheering someone up after a loss or...a heartbreak. Immediately the broken pieces weld together, and the little heart flies back into my chest. All feeling of Agatha’s watery magic ceases.

“Today’s been eventful,” Baz says with a smirk. He collapses down next to me, leaning against the tree trunk.

“Yeah it has.” I still can’t believe after all those years of hating me, he just mended my broken heart, as if it was an everyday chore.

“By the way, I’m not an idiot. I know what the In a Heartbeat spell does.”

Heat rises to my cheeks.

“I...I’ve liked you, for forever, Snow,” he says, looking away. “Almost since we met.”

My eyes go wide. “Really?”

“Really. And if you like me back, I mean...”

Without waiting another second, I shut my eyes, lean in, and press my lips to his. It lasts just a few seconds as I pull away to gauge his reaction.

Baz grins from ear to ear. He still has his eyes closed. Slowly he opens them to study my worried face.

“Okay...” he says through his smile. “That was...great.”

“Yeah. Not bad.” I run a hand through my hair awkwardly.

We’re so close that our chests are nearly touching, and I can feel Baz’s heart thumping against mine. Our heartbeats are nearly two hearts beating as one.

[sconeboi]

✧World of Mages Spellbook✧

A little bird told me: a spell to make birds deliver messages

A place for everything, and everything in its place: teleports target to its rightful place

An Englishman’s word is his bond: binds an oath with magic, breaking the bond makes your hand cramp up and you would loose your voice for a few weeks

And we all fall down: makes the target fall to the ground

April Showers: re-blooms flowers

As you were: returns a broken/misplaced object to its original state

Back off: pushes someone away from you

Back to start: resets something to its original state

Be our guest: the guest of a home will become immune to all dangers created inside the house

Bend over backwards: makes the target bend over backwards uncontrollably

Candle in the wind: Increases stamina, but can backfire by creating a fire you can’t put out

Cat got your tongue: effects unknown, a “wicked spell,” most likely vanishes one’s tongue temporarily

Clean as a whistle: cleans off the dirt you can see from the target

Come out, come out, wherever you are: makes something hidden appear

Dead in the air: kills everything flying in the air within a certain radius

Don’t worry, be happy: calms the target down

Early to bed and early to rise: a healing spell

Fine tooth comb - _____! : finds a particular phrase/name from a book

Float like a butterfly: allows the caster to float to the ground effortlessly

Get well soon: a healing spell

Hair of the dog: to cure a hangover

Have a break, have a Kit-Kat: crumbles rocks

Hell hath no fury: conjures large amounts of controllable fire

Helter skelter: A children’s spell to make things go flying when throwing a tantrum

Here ye, here ye: to make one’s voice carry 

Hurry up:  makes vehicles move faster

Hush little baby: calms the target down 

Into thin air: to vanish a mess

It’s show time: reveals something hidden

Ix-nay on the atford-Way: the victim will be unable to talk about magic to any Normal

Ladybird, ladybird, fly away home: for casting out pests and mice

Let there be light: conjures light around the area

Make a wish: extinguishes a flame

Make way for the king: clears traffic from a road while driving

Nonsense: a spell for scared children, for sweeping away practical jokes and flights of fancy

Olly ollly oxen free: makes something hidden appear

On love’s light wings: to make a person float, only works if you understand the Great Vowel Shift of the Sixteenth Century and if you’re stupidly in love

Open Sesame: opens doors dramatically

Out, out, damned spot: removes stains, especially blood and “unspeakable things”

Paper beats rock: When the spelled paper hits the target, they become unconscious (not sure about this one?)

Resistance is futile: makes the target stop resisting

Run for your life: gives the target stamina to run quickly away from danger

Scooby-Dooby-Doo, where are you: reveals something hidden

See what I mean: enables the caster to write in the air with their finger

Simon says: feeds magic into the target to give them the ability to cast a spell

Some like It hot: warms food and beverages

Stand your ground: spells one’s feet into the dirt

Stay put: to keep your hat in place on your head

Stay the course: puts a car in “auto-pilot” while driving

Take it away: to vanish a mess

The lady’s not for turning: a spell to be used in combat, especially for women, effects unknown

The truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth: forces out honesty

There’s nothing to see here: to refocus attention

These aren’t the droids you’re looking for: hides something out of view

Twinkle, twinkle little star: teleports the caster to a space-like world? 

Tyger, tyger, burning bright: immolates the caster in a burst of flames

U can’t touch this: barrier spell, only works if the threat knows the song

Up, up and away: teleports/levitates an object to a desired location, should not be used on humans, because you can accidentally pull out their lungs through their shoulders

You’re getting warmer: warms the target

Your attention please: to attract attention

this is every spell from Carry On by @rainbowrowell ! this took so long but it was worth it!

[sconeboi]

are you thinking what i'm thinking

me flirting: hey wanna go be gay in the woods

[sconeboi]

return the favor

length: 0.8k

type: the fluffiest fluff

warnings: none!

Alternate ending of chapter 39, where Simon does just what Baz’s mother asked him to do

thank you @alwaysfangirly for being an incredible beta!

“What? he asks. “Was there anything else?”

“Well...she kissed me.” My hand jerks up, and I brush my fingertips over my forehead. “She told me it was for you, to give to you.”

He clenches his fists at his sides. “Then what?”

“Then she left...”

SIMON

“Oh...” Baz sighs. “I thought there would be more clues.” He shifts the notebook around in his lap.

We’re silent for a solid minute. Baz scans my notes from the night of the Visiting over and over again. His fingers stroke over the place where I wrote “Kissed my forehead, told me to give it to him.”

“You...you don’t actually have to…’return the favor,’ you know.” he stutters.

“What do you mean?”

“You just said my mother asked you to give me a kiss from her.”

“Right...” I say. “But, uh, why not?”

“What?”

I sigh. “If a vengeful ghost asked you to do something for them, you would do it, wouldn’t you?”

“I guess?” He raises an eyebrow at me. “What exactly are you proposing to do, actually kiss me?”

“Can’t I just do it?” I ask. “To take the weight off my chest?”

“No, I think I’ll deprive you of the pleasure.”

“Baz.”

“Alright, alright, just do it.” He brushes the hair from his face and tucks it behind one ear. “But only if you help me.”

“Help...help you?”

“Yeah, help me find out who killed her. My mother.”

I pause for a moment. “Alright. Sure. I’ll help you.”

For a second I think Baz actually almost smiled, but the corners of his mouth drop just as quickly as they flew up.

Before he pushes me away, I sit up a little so that I’m level with his face. (Baz has always stood a few inches taller than me, the giant bloke.) I stretch upwards more and press my lips onto the center of his forehead. It’s so awkward. I pull back immediately and study his face to gage his reaction.

But instead of throwing out some sassy remark, Baz grabs my chin and kisses me again, right on the mouth.

BAZ

I can’t take it anymore.

As soon as I saw the mention of my mother kissing Snow and asking him to pass it along, I felt my heart light up and flutter around in my chest. I assumed he wouldn’t go for it. Aleister Crowley, when he kissed my forehead, it was so, so soft. I never wanted it to end. But he was there for a second or less. It wasn’t enough.

And hell, if my life (or the little life I have left) is going to end, it might as well be right here, right now.

I try to pull off the smooth thumb-to-chin thing you always see in movies, but I sort of end up grabbing Snow’s face and pulling it into mine. But I executed the mistake well.

He’s not pulling back. He’s not pulling back. I think my heart is about to explode right out of me. The bliss in my head is enough to make me lightheaded. I’ve been dreaming of this moment since about 4th year, and it’s surpassing every expectation I’ve ever had.

SIMON

Baz drops his hand from my chin and cups both hands around my face. It’s so wonderful – just the feeling, let alone the snogging. And I don’t know why.

He’s literally my enemy. My enemy that I just made a truce with, mind you. But I still want this.

I run a hand through Baz’s hair and slick it back. A piece falls out from behind his ear and lands right between our lips, interrupting the kiss. We both laugh, as if we’ve been happy boyfriends for years. I take the lock of hair and run my hand through the whole of it again.

But we both don’t lean back in. I stare into Baz’s eyes. Today they glisten like silver stars.

“Well...” he mumbles. “That was...”

“Interesting,” I finish. “Very interesting.”

Now he smiles. For real. It’s a nice change from his normal brooding gaze.

“Yeah.”

“It was good,” I say awkwardly, stretching my arm over my shoulder. “Different than what your mum did, though.”

“Oh, sod off, Snow,” Baz scoffs, rolling his eyes.

“So...”

“So?”

“I guess I still have to help you?”

“I should hope so,” Baz huffs. “I’m kind of hoping that snogging for a good 5 minutes eliminated the thought of you punching me in the jaw ever again.”

I narrow my eyes at him.

“Just a suggestion.” He picks up my hand and laces his fingers through mine. “I’ve wanted to do this for a long time.”

“Me too. I think.” I pause. “Why the fuck were we ever enemies?”

“Snow, you’re the Mage’s Heir. The Chosen One. I’m the Pitch’s family heir. We were born enemies.”

“Are we still enemies?”

He laughs. “I guess that’s up to you.”

“Then no. Absolutely not.”

And I plant another kiss on his forehead.

[sconeboi]

@carryonbydefault i have no idea

Me patiently waiting for a snowbaz in a heartbeat au

[sconeboi]

stop professionally analyzing this cursed ask

"GET OUT OF MY SWAMP" screams baz at the (handsome) insolent donkey on his property. The donkey blinks back with large blue eyes. "Get out of my thoughts, then." Baz doesn't know what to say. "O - onions..." he stammers. "Yes, Basilton. Onions." They share a passionate kiss as the sun sets.

this is the worst/greatest thing i have ever read

[sconeboi]

Baz & Simon: *holding hands together in the street*

Homophobic asshole: You're going to hell!

Baz: *conjures a flame into his hand*

Baz: Oh darling, I've already been there.

Asshole: *faints*

Simon: *can't stop grinning at his beautiful boyfriend*

[sconeboi]

"GET OUT OF MY SWAMP" screams baz at the (handsome) insolent donkey on his property. The donkey blinks back with large blue eyes. "Get out of my thoughts, then." Baz doesn't know what to say. "O - onions..." he stammers. "Yes, Basilton. Onions." They share a passionate kiss as the sun sets.

this is the worst/greatest thing i have ever read

[sconeboi]

i'm gonna do it

Me patiently waiting for a snowbaz in a heartbeat au

[sconeboi]

[sconeboi]

i was not mentally prepared for this today @rainbowrowell

link to rainbow rowell’s spotify here

link to her playlist “CARRY ON: Simon” here

link to her playlist “CARRY ON: Baz” here 

[sconeboi]

✨tonight we feast like mages✨

[sconeboi]

this is what you want

length: 1.9k

type: angst and lovely fluff

warnings: blood, killing a monster

Based on this quote:

“Sharing a room you hate most is like sharing a room with a siren. (The kind on police cars, not the kind who try to entrap you when you cross the English Channel.)” -Simon Snow, pg. 166

AU where Simon and Baz cross the English channel on a quest, but Baz gets seduced by a siren on their way

thank you to @acraycratfangirl and @the-jeans for being my amazing betas!

BAZ

“Are we theeeerrrrrrreeee yet?” Snow asks, his head dangling off of the tiny rowboat we’re traveling in.

“Two hours, I’d say,” I reply. “Enjoying yourself much?”

He groans loudly and sits up. “We’re slowing down…”

I raise my wand and feel the snap inside of me that lights my magic’s match. “Up shit’s creek!” I say, pushing the flame out through my voice. The paddles on the side of the boat; rowing on their own, begin to move faster.

“You promised to help me find out who my mother’s killer was,” I tell him sternly. “You were sooo eager to come along…”

“You know what? Fuck you,” Snow says suddenly, rolling his eyes. “I’ve got nothing to do but bicker with you.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, Princess Snow, would you like me to spell you a fucking football pitch out here in the middle of the Channel?”

“I’d actually enjoy that very much, thank you,” he replies sarcastically.

We’re seated on opposite ends, as far away from each other as we can get. I would give anything to change that – Snow and I, squished together and snogging on a little rowboat in the middle of the sea. The very thought of it makes my stomach do a dance, but I keep the stern expression glued to my face.

“Let’s get down to business,” I say. “Once we reach the vampire hangout–”

“Don’t say hangout,” Snow interrupts.

“Wha…why?”

“Say lair. You’re making the ‘giant dark bat underground hideaway of death’ sound like a couple guys having a good time.”

I roll my eyes. “Once we reach the vampire lair…”

Snow smiles slightly and I go a little lightheaded.

“We need to find Nicodemus and if he isn’t there, I believe I know of another place my aunt sometimes speaks of.”

“Wait, you’re telling me there are two bat caves?”

“Bat caves…what the fuck?” I want to slap that smug grin right off his face.

“You know, the Bat Cave? From Batma–”

“Snow, I’ve seen a hundred Batman movies in my lifetime. Besides, you said it yourself, don’t joke about the vampire lair of death.”

His face droops, and I smirk just to tug on his heartstrings.

All of a sudden I notice that a thick fog is forming around us. Snow sits up and summons his sword by his hip.

“What’s wrong?” I whisper.

“I..feel him…” he says. “The Humdrum. He’s here. He’s causing the fog.”

He’s right. As I reach out of the boat and touch a puff of mist that’s swirling in the air, an empty, hollow feeling shoots through my arm. The fog encases the entire rowboat, and the flame of magic flickering in my gut fizzles out forcefully. Simultaneously, the oars stop paddling. The warm buzz of Snow’s usual aura goes out like a light.

Something starts writhing through the water and I don’t even try for my wand; I know it won’t have any effect in this dry patch. Snow leans over the boat, knuckles white from holding his sword so tightly, nearly rocking it over. I’m flung from my current position and crash right into Snow. We stare at each other, stunned for a moment, until a splash makes us both turn around so that we’re back-to-back, searching for the sound.

My head throbs as I watch Simon Snow majestically emerge from the water.

SIMON

I turn to face Baz again to see a figure splash up from the water. At first I think it’s the Humdrum, but somehow I know it’s not him – there’s not that intense throbbing feeling that made my pores bleed. I know that feeling all too well.

The figure resembles myself, maybe in my 5th or 6th year at Watford. But it’s so flawless it might as well be a mannequin. Its curls fall in perfect little bounces, its moles are lighter and smaller, almost like freckles, and its eyes are a brilliant blue instead of my ordinary grey.

“Simon?” Baz asks the figure, his face in shock.

“No Baz, I’m behind you,” I tell him. He doesn’t budge. “Baz. Baz!” I grab his shoulder but he shoves me off. “It’s not me!”

The figure hisses like a snake, and Baz stares at it like he’s taking in every word. His lips are moving, but barely a sound escapes.

BAZ

“Snow…” I gasp at him, taking in his beauty.

“Hey, Baz.” He smirks like the handsome devil he is. “You’re looking nice.”

“R-Really?” I stutter, rubbing my arm awkwardly. “Y-your’re looking n-nice, too.” He looks too good to be true.

He laughs. “No need to be nervous. We’re just talking.”

“I know, you’re just…”

“Baz, I know how you feel about me.”

I think my stomach just flipped over completely. “What?”

“I feel the same way. I want you, Baz. You’re the most amazing guy I’ve ever met, that’s a fact.”

“Same! Same! Same!” I’m practically yelling at him. “I love you, Simon! I love you!”

“Hush,” he says. I do. “Do you want to kiss me, Baz?”

I nod up and down stupidly.

“Close your eyes, Baz. Walk forward towards the edge of the boat. I’ll catch you.”

I shut my eyes tight and start walking. “Will you scoop me up into your arms and carry me away into the sunset?” It’s like I’m acting out my 5th year fantasies.

“Absolutely. You have to trust me.”

I stop pacing. A force is grabbing me, pulling me back. It’s got me around the waist, nearly lifting me off the ground. I throw an elbow back to hit it away, and immediately it ceases.

And with the diversion, I suddenly start to question myself. I don’t trust Simon Snow. I always knew that we would kill each other some day. This could be a plan of his to snap my neck; to lure me in and then murder me while I’m loopy in love.

“You have doubts,” he says. “But this is what you want, Baz. This is what you want. You want to trust me. You want to kiss me. You want to touch me everywhere and more. You want me, Baz.”

He’s right. He’s too right. I keep walking with my eyes closed, under a trance that I never want to break from.

SIMON

Just as I have my arms locked around Baz’s waist, he throws his arm back and elbows me right in the gut. I’m thrown back helplessly, clutching my stomach and stifling a scream.

I can’t understand the monster, but Baz remains speaking plain English. After whispering under his breath he suddenly shouted out things I didn’t understand. Things like “I love you” and gibberish I couldn’t grasp. But pretty soon, the monster began unhinging its jaw like an anaconda until its mouth was practically perfectly Baz-shaped. It’s the most hideous thing I’ve ever seen. And since Baz closed his eyes a long time ago, he can’t sense anything that’s going on.

The monster keeps hissing and screeching, and Baz smiles bigger and bigger as the noises get louder.

“BAZ!” I scream at the top of my lungs. “STOP!”

“I want to kiss you…” he murmurs, reaching out his arms. He’s on the ledge of the boat, a foot away from the monster’s mouth.

“WILL YOU STOP, THEN?” I shout over the insane screeching. “IF YOU GET WHAT YOU WANT?”

“Sure…” I can’t tell if he’s replying to me or the monster. He’s inches away from falling right down its throat.

I sprint up to the ledge and turn Baz’s body my direction. In one giant movement, I smash my face into his. After a few seconds he looks up at me, entirely bewildered. Without wasting another moment, I slice the monster completely in half with my sword. It shrieks as the two halves shrivel up into dust and sink into the water.

My entire body quakes uncontrollably. I collapse down onto the seat just as my sword disappears. Small droplets of warm blood drips down my cheek and shoulder.  The image of slicing myself still resonates in my mind. Well, myself with my jaw unhinged like something from my nightmares.

Baz still stands there, blinking like an idiot. Eventually he falls onto the boat’s seat right next to me, our thighs touching.

“What the fuck just happened?” he asks me, running a hand through his hair.

“It was a siren,” I conclude, panting. I remember from one of the days I actually payed attention in class while Baz was gone – sirens swim in the English Channel. “A siren tried to eat you. It put you in a trance. You hit me when I tried to stop you.” I pause. “Really hard, actually.” I rub the area lightly.

Baz winces and a little bit of pink fills his cheeks. “I’m sorry,” he says. “I didn’t know what I was thinking.”

“Obviously,” I laugh. “The siren actually looked like…me.”

The pink in his cheeks deepens. “That’s…weird.” He pauses. “So did I kiss you or the siren?”

I bite my lip. “Listen, it was the only way to get you to stop walking towards your death…”

“Wow, how embarrassing, Snow,” he taunts. “Kissed Basilton Pitch, what a tosser, guess you’re gay now…”

“Stop it, Baz.”

“Well, if it was the other way around, you would’ve never let me live it down.”

“If I’m the one who’s suddenly gay,” I start to say, the gears turning in my head. “Then why did the siren take my form?”

“Maybe it was a mistake,” he suggests immediately. “I could have been pondering the different ways to kill you when it attacked us. Such a passionate emotion, could have been like love–”

“Why were you saying ‘I love you’ over and over?” I continue, ignoring him. “Why were you under its trance? Why did you want to kiss me?”

“I don’t know, I don’t know…” Baz stutters. Then, sternly, “Maybe I love you, Snow.” 

We’re both silent, staring at each other in disbelief at what the other has said.

“Maybe I love you,” he repeats, softer. “Maybe I’ve loved you since fifth year, maybe even before. And maybe it hurts so badly whenever you say you hate me, nearly every…single…day.”

His saltwater-colored eyes start to fill with tears. “Just forget it.” He starts to stand up.

“No, B–Baz, wait, I…”

“Shut up, Simon.”

Simon. “Fine!” I shout. I grab Baz’s arm, pull him back down, and press my lips onto his. It’s a softer kiss this time, and of course, neither of us back away. I reach up and grasp the collar of his shirt to pull him closer. His hands go up to my cheeks, which are blushing profusely. But this is what I want. I think it’s what I’ve wanted for a long time.

Suddenly Baz gazes away and pulls back.

“Alright…” he sighs. “I can see land. I’ll spell the oars again. Get the map from my pack.”

“Wait, what?” I say. “That’s it?”

“That’s it.”

“But–”

“Snow, we’ve got work to do.”

“Then after work can we…you know…”

“Snog again?” Baz says, smirking. “Possibly. I mean, absolutely.”

I smile at him.

Everything is starting to seem right.

[sconeboi]

my friend just sent me this i’m cRYING inspired by @satanicslushie 's "baz in jondoms" post