seahorsemeow-blog

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Ash Ketchum witnesses an assault and wants to help until he sees a gun

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Fuck the idea that you can’t engage in sex acts with abstract concepts.

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Deadpool (2016)

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imagine ur watching sex and the city and they’re at the coffee shop and they pan to all the girls individually and this is what they pan to for Miranda would you even notice

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shapeshifting is the best super power because you can have any haircut any time you want, you can turn into a hotter version of yourself, you can turn into a dragon, you can turn into a robot, you can turn into a shambling mound of abstract shapes and sulk outside your estranged father’s house at night while chanting ominously about his sins,

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good: expecting “u cant touch this” and instead getting “super freak”

bad: expecting “sweet home alabama” and getting that kid rock song

ugly: expecting “under pressure” and getting “ice ice baby”

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When you’re on your way home from the club but one of you almost died

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Dead at the “lol you wild. Wyd though”

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sam “i’m tired of everyone’s bullshit and super-powers” wilson.

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The way we perceive time and history is so weird I get so tripped out when I think about how Cleopatra lived closer tot he iPhone being invented than she did to the Great Pyramids being built. Or how Stonehenge would have already been ruins when Jesus walked the earth or how Oxford University is older than the Aztec Empire or how Anne Frank and MLK were born in the same year like man this it’s all so crazy

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My best friend trusts me so much she gave me her phone and had me sext a guy on her behalf while she’s driving. This is the realest relationship I’ve ever had

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This is my fave video

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im amazing but im not for everybody