Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare.” -Audre Lorde
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Is Everyone Else?
Connecting easily
Finding time to spend with each other
Understanding each other’s jokes
Falling in love with themselves
Able to get up and go to work without fear
Connected to their breath
Alive and well
Being kind to themselves
Able to finish projects
Smiling everyday
Loving the world
Going out dancing
Not crippled with anxiety
Not riddled with irrational fear
Able to move without their legs shaking
Able to speak without feeling bile pile up in their throat
Not laying in bed and calling in sick because their legs feel like anchors in the ocean
Smelling flowers
Singing in the streets
Having a good time
Because from here
That’s what it looks like and it makes me feel so out of place.
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Danai Gurira | Be more human | Reebok
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Pros of today’s English class: This was shown.
Cons of today’s English class: That one idiot who won’t stop treating it like a joke.
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Note to self. 💜 http://bit.ly/2szfsYM
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Not perfect things, but honest things
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On Sharing Thoughts
I felt like my thoughts were disorganized and unreadable.
I wanted to hide away
Because my heart was beating so fast and my head was spinning on edge
I felt immature and inappropriate
Sharing too much with the world made me share for the sake of gaining their approval.
I shared and craved the heartbeat that appeared in every photograph
I was thanked by friends and loved by family but overall I felt judged.
I felt young. I felt like I just wanted to be seen.
Creation for the sake of being seen.
Felt wrong.
I want to see myself first so it doesn’t matter if you see me.I want to look in the mirror and see my own value so it doesn’t matter if you make heartbeats on my poetry or comment on my photos
I want to share to inspire, to heal, to speak life. I don’t want to continue to share from a broken place.
Sharing my thoughts from a place of “I didn’t get a lot of attention growing up and here is some trauma,” hasn’t been fun.
Sharing from a place of “She’s pretty why am I not pretty?” Hasn’t been fun.
I want to share from a place of “im not perfect but I love me, so I love you, and I want to share something with you that could brighten your day and mine and if you don’t see it that’s fine too.”
I stopped sharing everything. Now I just create in alleyways, in classrooms, in bedrooms, in voulenteer spaces.
Not on stage. Not on Instagram. Not on Facebook. Hidden from the world. Terrified of judgement.
I need to share again. I’m scared though.
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Nilah Magruder: The first asexual woman of color to write for Marvel comics.
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Just wanted to fix some things in this drawing of the last year bcs… I dunno new style??
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On Vulnerability
A fracture in time
A broken heart in high school
A script ripped up in my face
A windex bottle postured towards my mouth
The words kill yourself hurled at me
Words forgotten
Never to be seen again.
Out here
But in here
They fester
Every time I try to share myself
These are the things I hear
This is my vulnerability
I mentioned it
Why is it still here?
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