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anyone else dye their hair pink last fall because of @taylorswift ? just me? okay. ♥️

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GUYS. ITS HERE AND IN MY LIFE. I am so proud of Taylor for thus album. This is her most emotional and honest one yet and I’m also the most emotional I’ve ever been during an album release. So many of these songs mean so much to my life right now and are helping me through some difficult times. I love you forever @taylorswift thank you for Lover. 💘

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GUYS. ITS HERE AND IN MY LIFE. I am so proud of Taylor for thus album. This is her most emotional and honest one yet and I’m also the most emotional I’ve ever been during an album release. So many of these songs mean so much to my life right now and are helping me through some difficult times. I love you forever @taylorswift thank you for Lover. 💘

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Because if I was a man, I’d be THE MAN.

Brb just doing a dorm dance for @taylorswift celebrating the fact that LOVER IS OUT. (Fully equipped with a color appropriate atmosphere). So proud of this one T. Love you forever. ♥️

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Hey @taylorswift here’s me dancing to YNTCD at our pride parade!! 🌈🏳️‍🌈

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💗💙

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i never miss a beat, i’m lightning on my feet, and that’s what they don’t see

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PLEASE STEP ON MY FACE

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You seem like the right person to ask but what the fuck is going on in the Taylor Swift fandom? Are they OK?

Okay friend, I’m going to give you the run down. Are you sitting comfortably? 

2PM GMT - SOME TAYLOR SWIFT FANS DECIDE - FOR SEEMING ABSOLUTELY NO INTELLIGIBLE REASON - THAT THERE IS A MURAL IN NASHVILLE THAT RELATES TO TAYLOR’S NEW ALBUM

THERE ARE NO FACTS TO BACK THIS UP

TAYLOR HAS NOT SPOKEN OF THIS MURAL

HER TEAM HAVE NOT SPOKEN OF THIS MURAL

THE ONLY VAGUE LINK IS THAT IT RELATES TO HER INSTAGRAM AESTHETIC

THEY’RE GATHERING IN THEIR HUNDREDS BY THIS MURAL CONVINCED THAT SHE’S GOING TO SHOW UP

WHY?

ABSOLUTELY NO FUCKING REASON

FLASH FORWARD (and we’re taking on the world together, and there’s a drawer of my things at your place) TO 5PM GMT 

AND THE ENTIRE TAYLOR SWIFT FANDOM ON TUMBLR IS BRACING FOR THEIR MOM TO CALL THEM BOO BOO THE FOOL LIKE SHE DID WHEN THEY ASSERTED CONFIDENTLY THAT BECAUSE THERE WERE FIVE HOLES IN A FENCE ON ONE OF HER INSTAGRAM PICTURES THAT A COUNTDOWN WAS HAPPENING

THEY’RE ASSUMING CRASH POSITIONS

THIS IS GOING TO BE AN OUTING OF STUPIDITY TO THE ENTIRE WORLD

NEWS CREWS ARE GATHERING —- AGAIN FOR NO OTHER REASON THAN THE FANS THINK SOMETHING IS GOING TO HAPPEN WITH ABSOLUTELY NO EVIDENCE TO SUPPORT THIS THESIS

EVERYONE ON TUMBLR IS DISTRESSED

DISMAYED

“THE WORLD WILL KNOW THAT WE’RE INSANE!!” THEY CRY, THEIR SELF-AWARENESS THEIR LAST REDEEMING FEATURE

AND THEN

WHEN ALL HOPE IS LOST

TAYLOR ‘I’M POTENTIALLY THE ONLY PERSON MORE BATSHIT CRAZY THAN MY FANS’ SWIFT GETS HER CLOWN ASS ON INSTAGRAM

AND CONFIRMS THAT IT IS HER FUCKING MURAL AND THAT SHE IS ON THE WAY THERE

“YOU FIGURED OUT (my secrets and I figure out why you’re guarded, you say we’ll never make my parents’ mistakes) THE CLUE!” SHE SHRIEKS

THERE WERE NO CLUES

NOT ONE

THEY TURNED UP IN DROVES BECAUSE THEY ALL DESPERATELY NEED TO GET A JOB

AND THEN - 6PM GMT - THIS ANGEL/DEVIL WOMAN TURNS UP AT THE MURAL AND TAKES WHAT SEEMS LIKE A SELFIE WITH LITERALLY ABSOLUTELY EVERYONE WHO’S THERE - WHICH BY THE WAY, IS ABOUT 500 PEOPLE AT THIS POINT

AND SAYS! NOTHING ABOUT THE ALBUM! NOTHING ABOUT THE SINGLE! NOTHING ABOUT ANYTHING!

SHE JUST SHOWS UP AND SAYS HEY (it was enchanting to meet you) 

OUTSTANDING

LITERALLY OUTSTANDING 

WHO KNEW SUCH CLOWNERY AND TOMFOOLERY WAS POSSIBLE?

NOT I, GENTLE READER! NOT THE FUCK I!

I’m literally in love with Taylor Swift, I have never wanted to be a celebrity’s friend more than in this moment. She’s so messy and I live for literally every second of it, we are SOUL MATES. 

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hi Taylor. My name is Shanna and I have been listening to you for 14 years. I remember being five years old and sitting in the backseat absolutely screaming Our Song. Flash forward to me getting my first car and screaming Getaway Car lol. Bottom line is you’ve been here for me when no one has. From my first middle school breakup to my more recent heartache. You music has stood by my side when no one else has. I’m eternally grateful to have you as a role model and best friend. 🦋🖤🦋🖤 @taylorswift

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Lifelong dream: go to an award show and dance with @taylorswift

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Only @taylorswift would make me prance around my house lip syncing and being dramatic. 🦋

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8:30?!? PM??? AUGUST 30th!?!?! TAYLOR????? BRENDON?? GOD?! OPRAH?! ANSWERS?!?

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I see what your doing here miss swift...

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4.26

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WHAT DOES IT MEAN

4.26

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*zooms in on every detail to see if theres a hidden message*

@taylorswift @taylornation