skyhon

[skyhon]

Hello?

[skyhon]

[skyhon]

british ppl are so funny man

[skyhon]

why are dudes in fanfic always getting hit with freight train orgasms. why not an orient express orgasm, classy and romantic. where are the shinkansen train orgasms? his orgasm hit him like the TGV atlantique breaking the passenger rail speed record. like the shanghai maglev, his orgasm was a feat of engineering but something of a commercial disappointment.

[skyhon]

before you beat yourself up for not cleaning, ask yourself:

is there a proper place to put the things you're tidying up?

[skyhon]

The spirit of Diogenes is alive and well

[skyhon]

As he unleashes troops to combat "crime" in D.C., Trump is simultaneously gutting the cops on the beat that stop corporations from harming us — the EPA, IRS, SEC, Labor Department, FTC, CFPB, Consumer Product Safety Commission, FDA, and Equal Employment Opportunity Commission. Some of these federal regulators being gutted are the same ones that oversee industries that Trump's family businesses are currently profiting from — like crypto. Trump never actually cared about crime. It's all a pretext for him to usurp more power and continue to profit off the presidency. And I didn't even mention his "free" jumbo jet. [Cartoon by Peter Kuper]

[skyhon]

me: uh oh! if i fail to block any more of these spells, the evil wizard will take over my mind and make me suck him off!!! i need to be careful, i can feel it working already...

the evil wizard trying to blow my head off with lightning bolts: that's not what I'm trying to do

[skyhon]

lol i went to delete a twitter account for reasons (i ran a satire account of my university’s president) and it wouldn’t let me.

[skyhon]

felt a mighty need to animate, Susie be upon Ye

[skyhon]

[skyhon]

hi, a lot of you need a perspective reset

the average human lifespan globally is 70+ years

taking the threshold of adulthood as 18, you are likely to spend at least 52 years as a fully grown adult

at the age of 30 you have lived less than one quarter of your adult life (12/52 years)

'middle age' is typically considered to be between 45-65

it is extremely common to switch careers, start new relationships, emigrate, go to college for the first or second time, or make other life-changing decisions in middle age

it's wild that I even have to spell it out, but older adults (60+) still have social lives and hobbies and interests.

you can still date when you get old. you can still fuck. you can still learn new skills, be fashionable, be competitive. you can still gossip, you can still travel, you can still read. you can still transition. you can still come out.

young doesn't mean peaked. you're inexperienced in your 20s! you're still learning and practicing! you're developing social skills and muscle memory that will last decades!

there are a million things to do in the world, and they don't vanish overnight because an imaginary number gets too big

[skyhon]

Samalamadingdong

[skyhon]

anxious to even be making this post but i am just so scared and upset. a lot of people think this is just a "trend" going around on tumblr, reddit, or even tiktok but its genuinely not. the friends in my trans social circles are apparently saying disgusting things about trans men now too. please stop telling people that this is just an online situation because it's most certainly not. ive had disgusting things said about me to my face simply for being trans from other trans people. im tired of being labeled in derogatory ways simply for setting boundaries or for not feeling safe around those who hate trans men like myself. i genuinely feel uncomfortable in almost all trans spaces not just because of the name calling but because i know with absolute certainty that this community wouldn't be there for me or my trans brothers if we needed help. it seems like a lot of people would rather watch us drown while calling us "whining little theyfab bitches" instead of throwing us a float. i am tired.

[skyhon]

why couldn't nepotism have chosen me, I would've spent all that money so wisely