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it was a one-eyed, one-horned, flyin' purple people eater

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tumblr users’ obsession with self-reporting (especially as a weird form of penance) needs to be studied

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Settles down on your dashboard gingerly and with a big heaving sigh

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oh actually it was me, i took sleeping pills last night

why i so tired who hit me with the Tired beam today

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why i so tired who hit me with the Tired beam today

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"WHY ARE YOU SHIPPING A VAMPIRE WITH THEIR VICTIM 🤮🤮" is. is that not the point of vampires.

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tomorrow……… is august„„„„,?????

its augu…….st?? tomorrW???????????

8th monTH???????? 4 ,more mont hs of 2013?????????????

what??????????????????????????????………………………..

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may be a hot take but i think the fact minors can access 18+ content by just clicking a button that says 'yes im totally over 18 trust me' is like. totally fine tbh. its a non-issue. i dont care if curious teenagers are looking at porn. they've been doing that for as long as porn has existed. id rather teens explore their sexuality through images on the internet than rush into real life experiences when they're not ready for it yknow. the UK is trying to put stricter age verification in place (which in turn is becoming an online privacy nightmare) and like. for what. who is it helping. why is this a problem.

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as humiliating as it is to repost myself from a light-mode-user's reddit screenshot, i cannot allow this year's zenquish to go uncelebrated.

celebrate my favorite holiday with me, my friends.

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A woman made a TikTok video after stepping into her boyfriend’s garage to get some air during a panic attack and finding all the doors were padlocked shut from the inside, barricaded with the windows blacked out with cardboard. She was like “Is this a red flag? Is this weird? I can’t trust my instincts because I have C-PTSD.” and all of the men in the comments were ripping her to shreds and saying she’s just insecure. Like, no girl. If I stepped into someone’s garage and they had it locked up like the Hope Diamond , I’d also start spiraling. I don’t care how valuable your motorcycle is or how bad the neighborhood is, the totally blocked off chained up no light room IS creepy.

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performative male starter pack: Striped rainbow ball he's bouncing on his nose, a set of horns in the scale of C, a fish he claps for

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PSYCHIC BLAST!!! LOVE YOURSELF MEOW!!!

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reminding myself how silly it is to constantly compare myself to others for Make A Terrible Comic Day

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there is only one worthwhile activity nowadays and its staring at people through a window at an elevated position and when they notice you you point at them

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It's really funny to take Spanish with people from different Spanish-speaking countries, because the ones from South American countries are like "Yeah no one uses vosotros, we don't know what it's doing here" and the ones from Europe are like "If you don't give our beloved second-person plural its due respect, the Hounds will find you"