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Her instagram is @katekusmina

Beauty. 🌸

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read if you are about to eat:

Just think about it for a second, do you honestly want to eat?

what will you feel like if you do?

youll feel guilty and sick and shitty and youll put yourself through more pain than if you just hold off

go distract yourself!

get out of the kitchen and far away from it

watch a movie, paint your nails, read a book 

maybe try on all your clothes, do you really your stomach do show through the fabric, do you really want your thighs to roll under the ends of your shorts?

think about how amazing you could look, all smooth skin and bones

think about the looks of jealousy and the looks of admiration youll get

think about how much you want thatput down the food. it doesnt really seem that appetizing now does it? that food will give you three seconds of pleasure, but being skinny will give you years

drink some water (:

stay safe

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was that ‘treat’ worth it?

was it worth waking up heavier?

was it worth hating yourself over?

was it more amazing than reaching your gw?

i doubt it.

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I eat because im sad and I’m sad because i eat

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(diminish)

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reblog if youre an idiot. reblog if youre just a fucking fool.

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found this

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Today I binged for the last time, for good. (No, really.)

For documentarial purposes, I shall list the session in consequitive visits to the kitchen.

3 sour cream & chive flavoured rice cakes

3 corn thins with salsa

12 ritz crackers

2 handfuls of salted, crinkle cut crisps

3 small slices of block cheese

Half a cup of yoghurt accompanied with some honey and weetbix

Almost 1 Litre of full fat dairy vanilla ice cream

6/7th block milk chocolate with almonds

6 melting moment shortbread cookies

What a binge to remember.

Aside from the binge, I fasted until 4pm and had :

1/2 cucumber with salsa

2 glasses of wine

1/2 tin size “one for all” Heinz spaghetti

2 slices of toast

1 egg

A caramel & cookie dough flavoured protein bar.

Easily exceeding a 3000 calorie total.

I started bingeing when I came back from treatment for ANR last year, and have stayed with my family ever since. My urge towards bingeing and purging large volumes of food since treatment has been thwarted by the worry and judgement of said family, who know what to look and listen for, after having caught me out countless times already. Feeling unable to “get away with it like I used to”, I was, at first at least, pleased with such a Hawkeye environment making sure I don’t bp. If I can’t purge, I couldn’t possibly allow myself to binge, right?

Wrong.

Oh boy, could I have not been more gravely wrong about something.

So it’s now 3am and I have a weightloss restoration plan resting at the food of my bed, ready to greet me when I wake, and tell me exactly how to be sure I don’t inhale a whiff of more than 500-800 calories here on out. I have even included an optional Cheat Day for the first time in history, because I’m wildly lenient with myself these days... but let’s be real, it’s mostly because I struggle to believe I can walk away completely from “the calorie hoards” at this stage. I know I Can, per say, but I don’t want to trust myself for a minute. If theres one thing I’ve learnt in this short life, it’s that trust breeds disappointment.

I may post said plan, I may not.

I may post pictures of my totally tumblr aesthetic lowcaloriesaladbowls, I also may not.

Hang tight.

The Bone Queen is about to regain her rightful throne.

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im about to say fuck it and leave this realm

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*not mine*

So my mom won’t be home until friday so i’ll be fasting today, tomorrow, and i’ll try friday too! If i’m lucky i can do Saturday too :)

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This sign is in my high school library and it hits me like a brick every time I see it lmao

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Don’t eat dear.

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Little Thinspo | DDLG

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You fucked up, again

And so, you ate. It started as always does: you fast so good, you are so proud of yourself, you’re about to hit a goal weight and then you just assume you deserve food. Just one bite, right? Just 100 calories, isn’t it? And then, AS ALWAYS, you have one more, and then the bites become three, four, five thousands. And now what? Now you just cry, poor thing. Pathetic, that’s what you are. You get that no one’s forcing you to eat? No one is shoving down your throat 3000 calories, are they?

Binging alone in your bedroom. On what, you don’t even care? Is it bad, is it good? Like you cared. Of course you don’t. You fill the void with food. Because you need two minutes of goodness to just regret it after two seconds.

Fill your void with control.

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