snail-email

[snail-email]

A whole wheelbarrow full!!

[snail-email]

And why do chickens have that red all over their faces?

[snail-email]

do you need some help there

[snail-email]

Ok then let me just see the other option and

Oh god dammit

[snail-email]

file -> phrases that are going to shift something in me forever

[snail-email]

clutching your head and screaming with blind rage

clutching your head and screaming with blind rage

clutching your head and screaming with blind rage

clutching your head and screaming with blind rage

clutching your head and screaming with blind rage

are you dizzy yet?

[snail-email]

u ever become friends with someone and you look back and think how the Hell did i pull them

[snail-email]

The Outbursts Of Everett True (June26th1919)

Art by AD Condo

[snail-email]

[snail-email]

children heed my warning. one day your body’s check engine light will come on and demand that you start eating so many vegetables and whole grains. do not ignore it.

[snail-email]

I don't understand why arachnophobia is so sacred compared to other small harmless animal phobias. They'll put arachnophobia-safe mode in a computer game before they put epilepsy-safe mode

[snail-email]

i do not "queue". i do not use "peak posting times". i do not "stagger" my art. i post it and then bury it myself. and if it doesnt get notes? i rb it again

[snail-email]

There was this guy in the 1800s - I can't remember his name, but his name is recorded somewhere - who honestly argued that if given the choice between a beautiful woman and a heron, deep down in their most earnest true heart, every man would rather fuck the heron. And he got mad when people denied this, continuing to deny this what he had decided must be an universal truth, instead of praising him for being the only one who was brave enough to finally say it out loud. Like he really thought that every single person telling him "Jesse what the hell are you talking about" was not only denying him, but denying themselves their true desires and perpetuating the apparently massive cultural lie that herons aren't fuckable.

Anyway what I'm saying here is that every once in a while whenever you find yourself in a situation where nobody else is willing to agree with something that you consider the most obvious truth, take a moment to meditate on the possibility that perhaps they do mean what they say, and perhaps they are right. Maybe nobody else but you wants to fuck the heron.

[snail-email]

[snail-email]

what they don’t tell you about online relationships is how easy it is to ruin them by simply having nothing to say. i like you so much but i don’t know how to hang out with you in silence. i don’t know how to text like a person so now you think i hate you. aaaaaaaaa

[snail-email]

why am i only just now learning about just how misconstrued the idea of "girl dinner" is from the original meaning

[snail-email]