snickersnek

[snickersnek]

Power armoured deep space bounty hunter type character with an oddly shaped helmet you're like 90% sure means they're some kind of alien, but then they take it off and it turns out they're 100% human and their helmet is shaped like that to avoid disturbing their very elaborate hairstyle.

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Sneet.

desperately writing on a giant chalkboard, erasing, writing again, pinning photos to the chalkboard, giant interconnected mess of yarn, building Hello Zepp type strings, I shove all my research off my table in a fit of rage and look up despairing, the camera pulls back to reveal the top of the chalkboard says SNAKE FEET?

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Will you be going more than 6,560 ft (2,000 m) deep into the ocean?

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tbh kwet probably tolerates spice more than me

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Waking up from your decade long enchanted sleep to learn that, not only is sharing your True Name with the fae okay now, but there's actually a rule against using a false name when entering the faerie market.

Your friends admit that this causes some problems— it's way easier to fall victim to a false deal, or get stolen away now— but everyone goes to the fae market to buy their goods so what are you gonna do? Not see your friends? Go out of your way to buy more expensive stuff from the human market? Yeah right.

Also yes they still perform their light-footed fluttering dances under the silvery light of the full moon, but in order to get in you have to first watch the dancers perform two short plays about why you should shop at certain local businesses. Also if you want to talk about the performance afterwards then you need to trade them your True Name, your home address, your date of birth and your personal interests.

You do this so that the fae can this information on a scroll and give it to local business owners.

Another part of the deal they broke is that nobody may talk negatively about those businesses within the market walls. In fact, your friends say, the enchantment is so effective that it's very difficult to talk negatively about anything at all.

“I know it sounds un-good,” your friend admits. “But there are loopholes.”

“In retrospect,” another friend says, “I wish the town had voted un-yes to teaching the fae about money.”

“On the plus side,” the first friend says, “I hear the market is investing in one of those enchanted statues that responds to questions with deliberately ambiguous riddles, so long as you trade it your memories of secondary school.”

“Oh, cool. Is that why they're burning down the library?”

You wonder if it's too late to go back to sleep.

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i hate it when i cant even write a poem about something because its too obvious. like in the airbnb i was at i guess it used to be a kids room cause you could see the imprint of one little glow in the dark star that had been missed and painted over in landlord white. like that's a poem already what's the point

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dragon who is PROUD and GRACEFUL and ELEGANT and REGAL and is not a companion animal and is frankly offended that you would even suggest-

yes please pet her snout please she wants it so much actually

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she/on them/esis he/vangelion

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FUCK THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA

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PENITENT: Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. It has been one week since my last confession. These are my sins.

PRIEST: Proceed.

PENITENT: I... (voice trembling)... I failed to signal a lane change on the I-5 express ramp.

PRIEST: I see.

PENITENT: There was a Subaru in my blind spot, and when he honked, I flinched and... and I muttered. I muttered "Come ON, man," but my heart was not charitable. My heart was full of rage. I coveted my neighbor's clear lane.

PRIEST: And did you merge?

PENITENT: (chastened) Yes, Father. But it was a hesitant merge. A cowardly merge. It lacked the conviction of a righteous lane change. I have dishonored the flow of traffic.

PRIEST: The Lord is merciful. Continue.

PENITENT: Yesterday, I was approaching a stale yellow light. I could have stopped. I should have stopped. But I thought of the car behind me, Father! I worried he would be annoyed! So I pressed on... I ran the red. Only for a second. The cross-traffic hadn't even started. But I saw it, Father. I saw the red light camera flash, and I knew I had been seen, not just by the Department of Transportation, but by God.

PRIEST: My child, this is a grave matter.

PENITENT: There is more. I have... I have occupied the passing lane for longer than was strictly necessary for the act of passing. Perhaps a full mile. It was... a power trip, Father. A sin of pride.

PRIEST: For your penance, I want you to say three Hail Marys and, for the next two days, you must let one person merge in front of you during rush hour, even if they're being incredibly cheeky about it.

PENITENT: Thank you, Father.

PRIEST: Go in peace, and yield to those on the right.

(20 minutes pass)

ME: I haven't got much time, Holy Father; the wretch constable is at my heels. How many Hail Marys is road head

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adding this to my "How it feels to pilot a Swallowtail" now that I finally picked up that third liscence level.

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I read the title first and scrolled down expecting a new monster.

Like, I genuinely tried looking behind the girl to see where the monster was before remembering that most people would be more interested in the human characters. She's cute i guess.

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Really like how your pfp snake head lines up with the banner image snake's head on mobile. Dunno if that was intentional or not but it's neat!

Honestly? Complete accident. They were both just placeholders until I noticed that they lined up and since then I've never wanted to change it up

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i cant believe this shit the HECU assholes got to my kitchen. i just wanna make a sandwich how am i supposed to deal with this

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i will start sitting in a clearing holding a small stone and rubbing it with my hand for 10000 years to learn how to empathize with the river bed

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...wait, what?

some 762 "Snickers" doodles