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Honestly, because of the fandom I'm starting to like Ford less. I mean, I still like him and find him interesting, but I want to know more about Stan. How he was treated growing up (since Ford was the obvious favorite to their father), his homeless years, how hard it was for him after Ford went into the portal (because hell, the guy probably thought on more than one occasion that his brother was dead), how he taught himself things he never even began to learn in high school, and more.

There's so much more to learn about him in canon but. Nope :) Ford first!

So Ford/uary is going to be a thing, ugh. It’s like Ford didn’t get a month and a week last year whilst Stan got none? Oh wait he did. It’s so great to see Ford fans still acting like Ford isn’t the obvious favourite, like seriously the only reason I’ve seen any Stan on my dash is because of Stanuary. Without it? It’s just Ford everywhere.

And like I love Ford but he’s just everywhere all the damn time, I mean heck he’s got a book explaining at least some of his portal years and there’s a blacklight version of it coming out in June. He’s already getting a fair amount of things in canon, when compared to Stan, let alone the way the fandom treats him.

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Ford studies Stanley from across the table, dazedly content expression on his face. His brother was oblivious to the stare, focus entirely on the needle and thread he was poking and pulling through the torn jacket on the table. He’s not sure how long he was staring, mind pleasantly fuzzy and relaxed, a state only Stanley seemed capable of causing. Quietly, Ford set down the pen he was loosely holding, and scooted himself around the edge of the curved booth, situating himself next to his twin. The only acknowledgment of the change he got was a minuscule turn of Stan’s head before it turned right back to the task at hand. Ford only gazed at him for a moment longer before a smile works onto his face.

“Can I kiss you?” Stanford asks casually.

Stan’s brows rise at the out-of-nowhere question, giving Ford a side eye glance before looking back down, a light dust to his cheeks. “You don’t need to ask, you know.” He grumbles, fidgeting with the fabric in his hands.

“Yes, I do.” Ford’s smile widens “Because it makes you blush like that.”

Stanley huffs, setting the sewing supplies on the table and frowning, face becoming even more flush after the comment “I’m not blushing.”

“You just got redder.” Stanford teases, leaning closer with a fond, toothy smile.

“No I didn’t.” Stan says too quickly, crossing his arms and raising his head defiantly, eyes closed and frown still cemented onto his face.

“For someone who’s supposed to be a con-man, you sure are a terrible liar.” Ford prods again, not even trying to hide the smugness in his voice. He leans even closer to Stan, pressing their shoulders together, reveling in the way Stan poutily leans away.

“Look, are you gonna kiss me or what?!” Stan finally snaps, tapping his fingers impatiently.

Stanford chuckles, then nudges Stan’s shoulder with his own. Stan turns to him, Ford takes his face into his hands and pulls him into a kiss. It lasts a few moments before their lips smack apart, and Ford leans back away with a satisfied smile.

“Thank you.”

“Yeah yeah, whatever, nerd.”

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This family is stupid attractive If you’ve surveyed the way we’ve acted

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LOOK WHAT CAME IN THE MAIL MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ME

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a secret santa gift to @bratnsfw!!! happy holidays, darlin!!

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porn dump of some art requests <3

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What time is it??

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Stancest, NC-17. 1000 words.

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“Wanna…fuck!”

“That’s the idea,” Ford said, before bending down and sucking the crook of Stan’s shoulder again. 

“Smartass,” Stan said. Ford kept kissing him, leaving wet trails up and down his throat, the exposed lines of his clavicles, his shoulders. It was hard to think with Ford on top of him, Ford’s hips slowly, steadily rolling against his, Ford’s clever hands setting sparks off all along Stan’s body. God, it was great when Ford was desperate like this, all of his pent-up energy after an excursion bursting out of him. Stan often had bruises afterwards, which he liked to prod and touch until they’d faded. He liked having the physical proof of Ford everywhere he went, so that it didn’t matter if Ford was in the room – he was there, the truth of him at Stan’s wrists, his thighs, his hips. 

Keep reading

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merry christmas

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All I want for christmas is youuuuuuuuu

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I have this headcannon thing that since Ford is such a big dork, he probably like bubble baths than regular baths. So, he and the reader would enjoy some sexy bubble baths.

(I’m going to have far too much fun with this one!! Major NSFW warning!!)

You find your book plucked from your hands midsentence and let out a squeal of protest. “Ford! I was reading that!” You twist your body in the tub to look at him pleadingly.

He is calmly bookmarking your spot, shutting the book and placing it on the counter near the bathroom sink. “You can read it whenever you like,” he says, undoing his belt and sliding it off. “But we’re on vacation, and this is my time, so you’re going to pay attention to me.”

He continues to undress as you protest, insisting your book was only just now getting good, and it was such a long day and you just want to relax, but you;re cut off when, as soon as he finishes undressing, he leans down to claim your mouth with his. “None of that,” he scolds gently as he pulls away. “No protests, no pouty faces. Scoot forward.”

He’s interrupted you before during bubble baths and he’s never failed to make it worth your while. You let out an obedient sigh and do as you’re told. Ford smirks. “Good girl,” he mutters, climbing into the tub and lowering himself into the water. Your back presses against his chest as he pulls you into him, settling you between his legs. You sigh and sink further back. “I see you’ve been utilizing the jacuzzi function of this tub,” Ford comments, snaking his arms around your middle and hugging you.

You nod, losing yourself in the moment. Your book is long forgotten. “It’s nice. We don’t have this at home, so I wanted to get the most out of it.”

“No, we certainly don’t have this at home,” Ford agrees, chuckling softly. “You want to know something I really love about these tubs?”

“They’re big enough for two?” you guess, grinning and twisting your neck to lean up and look into his eyes, and he smiles and kisses your cheek.

“Well, yes, but that’s not quite the answer I had in mind,” he grins. “Here. Let me show you.” He shifts to one side quite suddenly, his hands sliding down your sides and your outer thighs to your knees, gripping the soft flesh just beneath them and bending your legs.

You moan, caught completely by surprise at his sudden control, as the jetstream stimulates the sweet spot between your legs. Below you, you can feel Ford’s hard-on throbbing.

“That’s right,” Ford purrs, kissing your neck. “Isn’t that nice? Doesn’t that feel good?”

You whimper, squirming your hips to try to move out of the pulsating stream, but Ford has a tight hold on your hips. “No, no, you’re not going anywhere,” he scolds, his fingers digging into your skin. Your back arches, but his grip doesn’t falter.

“Are you close, dear?” he breathes into your ear. Your eyes are squeezed shut, your breaths are short and ragged. The water is pulsing onto your clit, teasing your entrance. You’d thought maybe about doing this as you sat in the tub, but the reality is far more intense than you could have imagined.

“Brace your leg on the side of the tub,” Ford commands, and you obey. His hand abandons your knee and creeps upward, between your legs, and with little warning he slips a finger deep inside you. “Cum for me, sweetheart.”

That does it.

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cheeziswin replied to your post “guys….beards are my weakness…….. you have no idea”

stan kissing fords neck and his beard tickling and scratching it. or kissing his tummy or his thighs or anything really ;))))

cheezi PLEASE. 

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Tell me stancest

(Teen!Stans alert.)

The rain poured so hard outside that all other sounds were muffled; when Stan shut his eyes, he didn’t even have to try to imagine the two of them somewhere far, far away, with the thin roof of the sailboat over their heads, the sea sloshing over the deck in lazy waves. He was pressed flush against Ford’s back, his hand on Ford’s chest. Thunder cracked overhead, rattling the window. Ford gave a little shiver, and just like that, something flipped in Stan’s mind, something that hadn’t ever quite left him since last week.

Ford was warm, against him. His hair was still damp from his shower, and he smelled of aftershave, and soap. The curve of his ass wasn’t pressed against Stan’s hips, but close enough that his pajamas brushed against Stan whenever he shifted. His foot was trapped between Stan’s calves, and tapped lightly, probably to the rhythm of the song they’d listened to as they got ready for bed. 

“You still awake?” Stan whispered against Ford’s neck. Ford’s foot went still. “Sixer?” Ford made a soft noise, affirmative. Stan gave his chest a little squeeze; he wanted to scoot closer, to close the gap between them, to press his growing erection against Ford. But he still didn’t know what to make of the incident that had changed things in him – still didn’t know if Ford even knew that it was an incident, because Stan had stayed very, very still throughout it. He’d listened, closely, as Ford jerked himself off, his back flush with Stan’s, only using short twists of his wrist. Stan hadn’t moved until after Ford had finished, and then it was just to turn toward him and wrap an arm over him and breathe in the sharp sweaty smell of him. 

Stan swallowed. He knew Ford could wait all night to hear what else Stan had to say, but suddenly, he didn’t know what it was, what words to use. Did you know? he wanted to ask. Did you want me to touch you? Were you thinking about me? “Some storm,” he whispered, finally. Ford nodded. Lightning flashed, a crackle filling the room; the boom of thunder followed. Can I touch you? Then, as if Stan’s voice had a mind of its own: “I liked it, y’know.” 

Ford tensed. “The thunder?”

Stan swallowed. “Listening,” he said. He dragged his hand down Ford’s chest, slowly – just like that, Ford was ramrod-tense, his foot jerking between Stan’s legs. Stan stopped just at the cusp of Ford’s stomach; half of his hand, and his thumb, still pressed the bones of Ford’s ribs. Half of it sunk into the soft give of Ford’s belly. 

“Oh,” Ford said. Stan heard him swallow, felt it against his chest. Stan’s heart was beating so hard he knew Ford must feel it against his back, and wondered if Ford’s own heartbeat matched it. 

Then, Ford’s hand lifted, and gently covered Stan’s. His sixth finger brushed the side of Stan’s hand. He pulled their hands down his stomach, down, down, to the heat between his legs, to his cock, fully erect and straining. Aching, Stan knew, now, for him. 

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Commission for @observationcollector! This was my first time drawing choking and Im pretty proud of this! Thank you for commissioning me!!

5-10$ Emergency Commission Orders Open Until Dec. 17

You can also check out My Patreon for more sin if you’d like ♥

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bro bros

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I’ve been waiting forever

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NSFW threesome (sorta), dicks ahoy

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Fanart inspired by Lem’s wonderful WPWT AU, wherein a Portal Ford finds a Teen Stan lost in an alternate dimension and they go on to have Rick&Morty-like adventures.