stefnw-blog

[stefnw-blog]

Tell me the last time you danced, and I’ll tell you the last time you were happy.

This research question is one I asked my body to answer through research. This qualitative research was conducted as an arts-based inquiry. I ‘did’ the darta in the form of both choreographed and improvised movement sequences. I danced, moved, felt and expressed using performance ethnography, and journalled my feelings through memory work (Leavy, 2008). Throughout this research, I was also inspired to write poetry, another way I often express my emotions, which I post regularly on a public Instagram page. I have linked new poems I wrote during research and older ones that illustrate depth of my emotions where relevant. I chose to conduct this arts-based research because I want other people to know what I already do: Dance is therapeutic. Dance is freedom. Dance is happiness.

Growing up, dance was my entire life. It was a personal history passed down from my mother, and hers too. The glittering universe of sequins, lycra, gold eyeshadow and red lipstick was my favourite part of reality. Every Saturday morning I would wake in the early hours of the morning, and my mum would slick my hair into the kind of bun that gives you a headache for 3 days after, but makes your cheekbones look great. We would pack the car full of costumes, hair pieces, make up and snacks and drive all around Victoria for competitions. A day at comps was non stop: hair, makeup, rehearsals, costume changes, dressing room gossip and the cherry on top: performing.

I started performing when I was 3 years old and I’ve never stopped. The rush of pure joy and adrenaline that takes over my body when I’m on stage is a feeling yet to be granted by anything else. It is exhilarating. Electric. It is when I am the most me.

I know that for me, dance is a safe haven, a happy place, a paradise. I am also acutely aware that for others, it is terrifying. For me, dance was always associated with my unbreakable bond with my single mother, with my friends, with my teammates. But for many whose life has taken them down a path not paved with diamontes, there is a daunting otherness to the world of performing arts. This research seeks to prove the overwhelmingly beneficial effects that moving your body can have on your mind and your heart.

Currently, there is a shortage of research related to dance education and its effect on social and emotional wellbeing. A thorough review of the educational discourse (White, 2018a) exposes a dearth in knowledge relating specifically to dance in the Australian primary school setting, suggesting a need for more targeted research on this topic. Dance education can be defined as the symbolic and movement expressions of a student’s ideas and emotions through unique uses of the body, celebrating spontaneity, originality and individuality (Dimondstein, 1971, as cited in Lobo & Winsler, 2006, p.501). Buck (2003) contends that the best way to teach dance is to start doing it, which is exactly what I did throughout this research project.

Arts is an often-overlooked arena of learning in Australian primary schools. The ambivalence that currently exists in education towards arts learning suggests a “privilege of place” is given to more traditional subjects such as mathematics and literacy (Eisner, 2002, as cited in Deans, 2016, p.2). Deans (2016) acknowledges that in Australia, the United States and the United Kingdom, dance education is a marginalised art form that is struggling to maintain its position as a rigorous study that challenges children’s thinking (p.52). Torzillo (2016) agrees, highlighting that “in Australia, dance education in primary schools has been long relegated to the edges of schooling, outside the recognised remit of education...considered marginal to formal schooling and not worthy of assessment; its products mainly useful for entertainment” (p.vi). I believe that arts learning is incredibly valuable in schools, as it provides students with rich opportunities for expressing their ideas and emotions and developing socially. Graham (2003) contends that arts education research is unique as it focuses primarily on the development of the emotional dimension of learning. Exploring this multi-layered, living, breathing, emotional universe, therefore, is my focus and priority whilst conducting this study.

Through dancing, I wish to uncover its effect on emotional literacy and anxiety. The rationale for this research is underpinned by a strong belief in the validity of arts-based learning, despite its undervalued standing in schools. As a dancer and anxiety warrior, I am deeply invested in the hope that maybe movement can help ease our sweaty palms, racing heart or quickening breath, or at the very least, allow us to forget about it for a moment and just dance.

Dance Darta:

I played the song Breathin’ by Ariana Grande to dance to merely because I've been really feeling her new album and playing it non stop, and went I first heard this song I immediately thought about anxiety and reminding myself to breathe when I am feeling anxious or edging towards an anxiety attack (turns out I was right: 00:53-2:43).

Something I found was that almost immediately I began to perform gestures that I associate with anxiety: suffocating, hands around neck, heart beating, franticness. I almost immediately started to choreograph movements rather than improvise. I think this was the dancer in me wanting to set things in stone. I began to embody all the anxious feelings into movements that mirror the physical effects of anxiety.

However, when the chorus hits and Ariana sings ‘just keep breathin, and breathin’ and breathin’ and breathin’ i wanted to keep that part as improvised movement. This meant it was different every single time I performed the dance. I think this happened because I was associating the word breathe with the movements I was dancing: they were free, flowy, loose, calm, and had a sunny energy to them. I think even in just 45 seconds of choreography/improv I represented two completely different vibes I experience often: anxiousness and freedom.

When I let go of the constricting movements of the anxiety mood, the free flowing improvisation that happened in the chorus parts were very smooth and expressive and full of emotion and joy. I felt I used the space a lot more during this time and a smile naturally formed on my lips. I threw my arms around a lot and even threw in some elevation and turns rather than flat stagnant movements. Next time I want to spend more time exploring this anxious-free zone of movement and see if dancing like that the entire time affects my real life mood and disposition.

This is an embodiment of anxiety. You’re not good enough. Shut your mouth. Stop speaking. No one is listening. Everything is going wrong. You’re going to stuff it up. Stop trying. Shut up. This, in a movement sequence, is how I feel when I am wracked with anxiety. This is the stuff I’m trying to prevent when I dance. This is a way to show you how I’m feeling without having to put it into words. This is anxiety.

[stefnw-blog]

I booked the studio with Kate a couple days ago and I woke up today so happy that I did so. A few things have happened this week in my personal life involving my dad and my parents separation that have left me rattled and anxious. I drove my brother to the airport this morning and he shared my feelings, so talking about it out loud really brought all past trauma with my dad to the surface. I felt upset and protective of my mum who he was trying to throw under a bus with childish comments and immature attacks. On the train into the studio my mind was swirling with thoughts of anger and anxiety and my fractured relationship with my father.

I think that really shaped my dancing choices today. All I wanted to do was put on music that made me happy and dance to it. No choreography, no planning, no perfection. Just improvise and leave it all on the floor. It felt really good and as I’m writing this, after dancing for about an hour and a half, I feel much happier and lighter than I did before. I’m starting to realise that the best way to cope with my anxiety through dance is just by moving freely. There is a place in my heart for choreography and nothing feels better than executing a sequence masterfully, but during this research I have found that I feel the best after improvisations. They are messy, and choppy, and sometimes hard to watch back, but they are also so much fun. I definitely rely on the same movement style every time and my favourite moves are repeated over and over again.  

When I put on the song ‘Nervous’ by Shawn Mendes, with its short, sharp melody, I started to play with a different, isolated, jazzy style that was really fun. It makes me think how in a classroom, I could allow students to improvise but give them a style of music that encourages a distinct style to play with. It provides direction without constricting their creativity. I really enjoyed dancing to this song and was surprised by the movements I produced, in contrast to my usual flowwy contemporary style that the slow, female voiced songs I gravitate towards inspire. Next session I’m going to thoughtfully select songs that evoke a certain characterised style and see what my improv looks like. It felt very creative and empowering so I wish to tap into it further.

[stefnw-blog]

After my findings last week, I purposely pre-selected songs for today’s dancing that had a jazzy feel to them. I wanted the music to determine my moments, I wanted the style to take over my body, And it did. As you can see in the following clips, my dancing took on a real stylised Fosse-esque energy which was really fun to do. It felt kind of like playing a character, and took me out of my head whilst I was dancing. When I woke up this morning I felt extremely tired and run down, like I couldn’t be bothered dancing and I wanted to stay in bed all day. I was feeling overwhelmed with all the uni work I have to do and the group assignment I’m about to go work on with some friends. The weather was really muggy which puts me in a terrible mood because my hair goes mad frizzy and I just feel a mess. I was already sweaty before I started dancing. I found that today my movements weren’t flowing as easily as they normally do. I was a bit restricted. So to combat this I put on the song ‘The Schuyler Sisters’ from the musical Hamilton, which always makes me feel amazing. The song explores themes of female empowerment and sisterhood, and its sassiness and upbeat energy seems to always uplift me, It also reminds me of my best friend Ashley, whom I saw the musical with on Broadway, and us driving around the streets where we live blasting this song and singing our lungs out. She has moved to LA to chase her dream of being a screenwriter, and I miss her terribly, but listening to Hamilton makes her feel closer. During this song, you can see me let go of technicalities entirely and just lose myself in the music. I started lip syncing the music (couldn’t help it) and just spin around freely. You can see near the end of the video, I wave to my friend Aaron through the window (he has arrived to do this damn group assignment). After this movement sequence I felt I was ready to join Aaron and stop dancing. My brain felt less foggy, my mood had lifted, and I was ready to take on the more mundane responsibilities of the day.

I love the Cup Song (watch the original here). I played this song after planning an activity for Arts Day for my Arts and Artistry elective. I am going to teach the children to sing this song, and we will do a simplified movement sequence with plastic cups. I love this song as it has a sunny chirpy melody, and the cup element is challenging and fun. It requires students to use their voices and their fine motor skills whilst being creative. I think it’s a great activity that could be used in the classroom to lift the mood of the students or as an end of day reward to celebrate their successes. It’s just so much fun. You can watch my spoken word poem (incorporating movement) about my belief in arts integration here.

Dance as Research:

This choreographed movement sequence explores the roller coaster of emotions I experience in my everyday life. I dance to the song ‘Folding Chair’ by Regina Spektor, a favourite artist of mine for her distinctive vocals and folky melodies. I also enjoy dancing to her work due to ever-changing time signatures and unique lyrics, adding character to the choreography. The emotions I convey in the dance piece are sadness/anger, joy, anxiety/self doubt and self love.  I choreographed this piece for Arts and Artistry but purposefully chose this focus so I could use it as a form of darta for this research project. The choice to integrate my exploration of dance in both of these subjects provided me with rich darta that in turn became my research.

The following analysis of the choreography breaks down each emotion I convey (emotional literacy) and provides a rationale for my artistic choices.

“Sadness/Anger:

(00:00-00:25 seconds)

In the first section of the piece, I am expressing the emotions of sadness  and anger. I am communicating these feelings through my choice of movements, which include short, sharp, stark, arm gestures, as well as low drooping levels. I am also using expression (a transferable drama skill) by wearing a tense, upset look on my face.

Joy

(00:25-00:56 seconds)

At 25 seconds, you can see a shift in my emotions. I throw down my hands and roll my neck backwards in a movement expressing release and relief. The following movement of rolling my ankles in the ‘sand,’ suggests a carefree and joyful disposition. This playfulness continues at 37 seconds when I play a game of peek-a-boo with myself, adopting a sense of childlike wonder. From 47 seconds, my movements including elevation of the leg as well as a series of jumps and high levels expressing lightheartedness and joy. I choose to smile broadly during this section so that my facial expression matches the sunny energy of my movements.

Anxiety/Self doubt

(00:56-1:09)

This short sequence expresses the emotions of anxiety and self doubt. My movements in this section are small and restrained, and my body language suggests discomfort and body consciousness. The smile falls from my face and a look of insecurity replaces it. I consciously decided to make this emotion the shortest of them all. I made this choice as I consider it extremely important to recognise the validity of mental health and erase the stigma therein, but also highlight the belief that anxiety should not control, overwhelm or overcome us. There is a always a light, or a smile, at the end of the tunnel.

Self love

(1:09-1:33)

The last section happened organically following the anxiety movements. Regina Spektor sings “I’ve got a perfect body, cause my eyelashes catch my sweat,” which is a fun and playful line which challenges societal norms of self love and body positivity. The choreography in this section portrays an aura of self love and confidence, demonstrated through the jazzy ‘shimmy’ movement and the free loving cartwheel” (White, 2018b).

Through this art-making, I was constantly self reflecting and developing my emotional literacy. I entered the dance studio feeling joyful and open-hearted: it was a sunny spring Tuesday and the thermostat hit above 20 degrees Celsius for the first time in months. I think my preexisting state of mind had a strong influence on my choreography and artistic choices, as a larger percentage of my piece evoked positive emotions than negative ones. Thinking about teaching in and through the arts, I will endeavour to use my own dance skills and background to develop the emotional dimension of learning for my students. I could ask students to create freeze-frames/tableaus of how they’re feeling today, to role play opposing emotions with a friend, or to choreograph a quick 8 count sequence which expresses a chosen emotion. I could also develop their emotional literacy by playing this video (or a similar one) to my students and asking them to identify the emotions the dancer is expressing through their faces and bodies. This could lead to discussions about wellbeing and empathy, and change the uncomfortable narrative surrounding discussions of mental health by approaching it with openness and honesty.” (White, 2018b)

The diverse range of darta presented above, I believe, proves my assumptions correct: dance helps. Every time I danced, I left the studio feeling happier than I was before I came in. Future educational research is required to study the direct impact of dance on emotional literacy and mental health of primary students, which should be carried out in a school setting. Interestingly, going against my technical training and perfectionism, I felt happiest whilst improvising. I think this distinction is important when considering my role as an educator. It is reasonable to assume that many students in my future classroom will not feel as comfortable dancing as I do. My personal epistemology as a competitive dancer and lover of the performing arts gives me a privilege not afforded to all.Therefore, when I am teaching through dance, I will remember this. I will focus on the act of moving our bodies, in messy, disjointed ways, over prioritising choreography and perfection. I will build scaffolds for students by choosing music carefully and giving them accessible prompts as entry points. I will, if necessary, make a beautiful fool of myself first so they can follow suit. I will teach them how to exert anxious energy into movements, and how to talk about their emotions freely. I will celebrate their openness and encourage their vulnerability. And above all, I will try my hardest to make dance for them was it has once again proven to be for me: an emotional sanctuary.

Reference List:

Buck, R. (2003). Teachers and dance in the classroom: So, do I need my tutu? (PhD Thesis). University of Otago. Retrieved from http://hdl.handle.net/10523/3556.

Deans, J. (2016). Thinking, Feeling and Relating: Young Children Learning Through Dance. Australasian Journal of Early Childhood 41(3), 46-57.

Graham, S.F. (2003). Developing Intellectual, Social and Emotional Literacy Through Dance Education. In P.Jeffrey, Australian Association for Research in Australia. Paper presented at the Joint AARE/NZARE Conference 2003, Auckland (1-11). Auckland, NZ: Australian Association for Research in Australia.

Instagram: S.N.White. (2018, October). Retrieved from https://www.instagram.com/s.n.white/.

Leavy, P. (2008). Method Meets Art: Arts Based Research Practice. New York: Guilford Press.

Lobo, Y.B. & Winsler. (2006). The Effects of a Creative Dance and Movement Program on the Social Competence of Head Start Preschoolers. Social Development 15(3), 501-519.

[Ricky Fung]. (2013, March 9). Pitch Perfect - Beca's Audition [Video File]. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=weqDCGg0GYs.

[Stefanie White]. (2018, September 19). Spoken word poem. Retrieved from https://vimeo.com/289268937.

[The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon]. (2018, August 16). Ariana Grande Predicted She Would Marry Pete Davidson Three Years Ago [Video File]. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Wu-UMKSATc&t=184s.

Torzillo, M. (2016). Dancing around the edges: dance in the primary school classroom (EdD Thesis). James Cook University, Douglas, Australia.

White, S. (2018a). How does dance and drama education affect the social and emotional capabilities of Australian primary students? Unpublished literature review, The University of Melbourne, Melbourne, Australia.

White, S. (2018b). Artefact Exegesis: Emotional literacy through choreographed movement. Unpublished paper, The University of Melbourne, Melbourne, Australia.

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