stupid-4-you

[stupid-4-you]

you are literally soooo good at writing angst!! can you do something with adrian where the team doesn’t know about the reader and adrian’s relationship but the reader gets injured and adrian freaks out so now everyone knows?

in this world full of people

pairing: adrian chase x reader (gn pronouns) rating: m+ word count: 2,054 combined with the anonymous request in my inbox: "Hi!! This is my first request ever, but my vigilante hyper fixation is going strong 😭 I’m a sucker for any hurt/comfort especially rescue fics! But really any will do, sorry for the lack of creativity lol" one-sentence synposis: the 11th street kids rescue you after you've been kidnapped and tortured by a cult— but the way adrian reacts in particular tells them exactly what the dynamic between the two of you has become.

read now on ao3!!

You’re getting kind of sick of cults.

It seems like every other case you’re all assigned to lately is some cult. A bunch of evil humans, a bunch of interdimensional aliens, a bunch of sadistic monsters— just endless groups that think they’re better than everyone else, suck up everything into it, and become hivemind monstrosities that can only end up imploding.

This case has been no different: a cult of superhumans living in the woods, which wouldn’t normally be an issue if they left other people alone. But these types love to involve others, and they’ve moved on from harassing locals as a recruitment tactic to creating superpowered weapons to threaten the locals into joining up and serving them.

From there, you were all able to determine, their plan is to move onto everyone in the state, then the country, then the world— as it so often goes with these things for you. Everything is taking over the world. Why isn’t anyone ever content with just hanging out?

That’s what you would be doing now, if you could. But, being the most recent addition to the team— and thus the least recognizable— you were selected to infiltrate the cult so you and the rest of the Kids could start taking it down before it becomes a tornado-of-supervillains situation.

You’d lasted two days before one of the new superhumans joining the team arrived and showcased their lie detector abilities.

And you’d been caught.

That was a week ago.

It’s been a long week since then.

It turns out that the superhumans value life enough to let you hang onto yours, but not so much that they’re not willing to play with it as a form of punishment for you. They have a variety of weapons— and a variety of powers— and you get to witness so many of them in action, in ways you wish you never had, in ways you wish you could forget, in ways that will scar you for the rest of your life— which might not be that long, depending.

You endure sonic shrieks that make your ears ring and your head throb and your nose bleed. You’re tied to a chair, and have been this entire time, unable to move; your body aches horribly, and you wonder if you’ll ever be able to get out of this position. You know both kneecaps are broken; one swing from a superhuman with super-strength had shattered them both. Even if you could break the silver, impenetrable ropes keeping you bound to the uncomfortable wooden chair, you wouldn’t be able to walk anywhere. You probably wouldn’t even be able to crawl by this point.

Burns from a super with pyrokinesis; lightning-bolt marks electrocuted through you by a super with electrokinesis; constantly soaked-through and shivering in this tiny shed they keep you in, because a weather-manipulating super has it storming constantly in here, no reprieve from the cold rain that pelts you at all times.

Occasionally, you manage to slip into sleep and get a break from it all— but it always comes roaring back when they wake you up again. They seem to enjoy having someone to test their superpowered weapons on; you don’t know how many knife blades they’ve brought to you by this point, testing on every inch of available skin. There’s a bullet festering in your shoulder made of alien material; that’s all you’d been able to find out before they’d experimented with it by firing it on you. You’d barely been able to feel the ball-ended whips they’d tested on you afterwards, you’d been so focused on not throwing up and passing out.

Now, after a week of this, you’d love nothing more than to just pass out and stay that way. You’re exhausted, you’re in so much pain you feel like you’ve moved onto another level of existence just to handle it, and you’re starting to wonder if the team’s coming for you— if they even can.

You feel a sense of panic at the thought of them being captured, too— of John, and Leota, and Emilia, and Chris, and— and Adrian—

You especially can’t think of Adrian in another tiny shed like this, being subjected to the same treatment you’ve been subjected to for the last seven days. At least, you think it’s been seven days; it’s getting harder and harder to keep track, and you think you’re losing time.

Blinking, you know you’ve just lost it again. It’s the strange feeling of slipping sideways, and you just know you’re coming in and out.

You just wish you could feel any relief in the moments you’re out. You barely remember them or notice them anymore.

In the distance— you don’t know when, or where, or why, but you feel a rumble.

Your brain foggily tries to tell you that this is something different, but your body is reacting instinctively. Every time there’s been a noise in the last week, the door has opened into your shed, and you’ve been hurt. Your body is still trying to protect itself, even after everything, and you cry out at the pain that jolts through you as a result.

Outside there’s the sound of gunfire, then shouting.

And you think you recognize a couple of the voices.

Not as belonging to people here, but as belonging to your people. You think you can hear the Kids— Emilia shouting instructions, Chris calling back to her— it’s them—

But—

This could be another trap. Another method of torture. You’d been wondering when they’d move on from physical torment to mental; it was only a matter of time before some superhuman with illusion magic, or manipulation abilities, or— or any number of horrors you could easily come up with, after the week you’ve had— before they decided to break your brain as well as your body.

Despite this fear, your heart still lurches into your throat when you hear Adrian in a shout of, “Not here!”

If he isn’t real, you’ve got nothing to lose. You’ll be hurt anyways; you’ll probably die here.

If he is real—

“Here,” you whisper, licking at your dry lips, cracked beneath your tongue. You can’t manage to get your voice very loud at first, your throat aching as you try again, “Here, I’m— I’m here—” You cough, then shout, crackling but louder, “I’m here!”

There’s more gunfire outside, then Leota shouting, “I hear something!”

Your eyes fill up with tears. You don’t stop, making yourself keep shouting, “Here, I’m here, please, I’m right here, please, I’m here,” on an endless, begging loop, louder and more frantic with each pass, until the door is crashing in. You flinch; every time that door has banged in, it’s been followed by pain.

This time, though, Leota and Chris are rushing through the doorway into the rain, and you sob with relief. In better circumstances, you might be embarrassed, but you have been hurt and drained and broken; you can’t hold back your relief at seeing them, hallucinations or not.

“You guys came,” you gasp out.

“Of course we did,” Leota says, coming to crouch beside you. She can’t stop looking you over with this horrified expression on her face; she looks back at Chris, asks, “What do we do?”

“Well, we can’t just— pick up the whole chair, we have to get (Y/N) out of it first,” Chris points out.

“But—” Leota starts, then stops. You can hear the unspoken words; you look like you’re about to fall apart, a beaten, wet mess held up by the ties keeping you attached to the chair.

Together, with knives Leota pulls from her belt, they work at sawing through the ropes binding you. You let your head drop; relief is flooding your system as you start to believe they’re real, their touch on you actually having weight and feeling, and exhaustion is seizing you.

“Hey, stay up,” Chris warns you. Into his communicator, he tells the rest of the time, “We’ve got (Y/N). Location is—”

“I’m on my way,” Adrian’s voice crackles through.

Your chest tightens hearing him. You’ve missed him so much; thoughts of him were one of the only things that got you through this. You’ve only officially been together exclusively for a couple of months, and you’ve still been keeping it a secret from the rest of the team.

You wonder how Adrian has been handling your absence. If the roles were reversed, you’re sure you’d be a wreck, determined to get him back, wouldn’t rest until you had.

When Adrian spills through the doorway, you know he’s felt the exact same as you would have.

Even with his entire body covered— face included, the prescription Vigilante visor shining red and getting speckled with rainwater— you can tell how destroyed he is about this from the tense lines of his body, the way he freezes when he first comes in, and then—

And then, him sprinting to you, sliding to his knees in front of you, grasping your face between his gloved hands. You flinch at the pain, and his hands leave; you beg him, “No, come back,” and he’s cradling you again, shifting upwards as the ropes are finally cut and you can sag into him.

“I’m so sorry,” Adrian babbles in your ear, desperate, words rushing together. He rips his helmet off in an uncharacteristic move, but it’s exactly what you need: to see his face, to meet his eyes, to see his red-flushed skin and his terror and him, to know he’s real. “Baby, I’m so sorry, I should’ve gotten here sooner, oh— Oh, shit, you look so bad, I’m so sorry, I’m— I’m gonna fix it, okay?”

You nod blearily against his shoulder. He lifts you up again, nudging you back so he can evaluate your face between his cupped hands again. The gloves are rough on your bruised skin, but you’re so happy he’s here, you just smile dazedly up at him.

“Thank you for coming,” you mumble upwards. “Love you.”

Adrian’s eyes widen, eyebrows lifting. “What? You— Wait— Sorry, wh—”

“I told myself I’d say it if I saw you again,” you tell him. Your blinks are getting longer, slower; you wish you weren’t in this rain anymore. “So, I am. I love you.”

It only takes a second for this to process through Adrian before he’s grinning. It’s a strange expression on his face, the simultaneous horror and elation, but you can see both there in spades.

“I love you, too,” he replies in a rush. “I love you so much, I’ve loved you since I met you, it’s been torture not telling you— Oh, shit, I shouldn’t be saying that, that’s insensitive as fuck—”

You huff a laugh that has him stopping, looking down to your mouth then back up to your eyes before he ducks in, pressing a gentle kiss there, careful with you.

It’s real. He’s real. This is real.

“What the fuck?” Chris demands from beside them.

“Is this really happening?” Leota asks. “Should I be stopping him? Is he taking advantage of—”

“I kinda think they’re into it,” Chris comments.

Your kiss breaks, and you loll against Adrian again, barely able to keep yourself upright. Everything is pain; you look up to Adrian, tell him, “Sorry.”

“Sorry?” he demands. “What sorry? What the fuck could you possibly be sorry for?”

“The secret,” you remind him. “Now they’ll know.”

His face is flushing from pink right into red when he tells  you, “I want them to know. Just— Not the bad guys.”

You smile, letting your head fall against his shoulder. “Love you.”

He kisses the top of your head, then moves to scoop you up. You hiss at the pain in your knees, your ribs, your head, your everything, and he kisses your cheek again, telling you, “I got you. I know it hurts, we’re gonna fix it all up, don’t you worry.”

“We are talking about this later,” Chris informs you and Adrian firmly. “Once you’re, you know— in one piece again.”

“Mmkay,” you agree, eyes closing. “Wake me up then.”

You let the pain throw your mind into fog, and you let your exhaustion finally take hold, and you sigh in relief as Adrian carries you out of the shed and into the warm sun.

[stupid-4-you]

OH MY GOD ADIRAN REQUESTS OPEN AGAINNNN I haven't watched any of the new season (idk how much is out yet lol) but I have. request for you.

I love all the angst and whump with Adrian so like what iffff Adrian and reader got in a car crash? neither of them are hurt EXTREMELY badly, but enough to land them both in the hospital and all. how would Adrian handle that situation? :0

wind is really blowing

pairing: adrian chase x reader (gn pronouns) rating: m+ word count: 2,532 one-sentence synopsis: you and adrian are in a car accident, and he does everything he can to save you— and everything he can to stay by your side as you both begin healing.

read now on ao3!!

It’s a normal day, for once.

Not a day where you’re protecting the city, or fighting aliens, or defending the world. Not a day where you deal with interdimensional beings, government officials, or heinous supervillains. You don’t even have a shift at work, or errands to run, or places you have to be.

It’s nice, for it to just be you, Adrian, and your journey out to the apple orchard.

And the radio, which Adrian has blasting top volume as he drives you both down the highway. You’re lucky that there’s hardly any traffic, and he steers easily, hands thumping out the music’s rhythms on the wheel. He’s singing along, loud as the music, encouraging you to do the same. With a laugh, you do, letting him reach over and tap out the rhythm on your thigh instead.

When you catch his hand, kissing the back, he glances towards you with a smile, glasses slipping a little. You reach up with your joined hands to nudge his glasses back up into place.

“Eyes on the road,” you remind him over the loud music.

He laughs, but does as you say, attention returning to the mostly-empty highway. In this rural area, it’s only your one lane heading north, and the other heading south, single lanes with no division between them except a solid yellow line painted on the road.

“I am going to eat so many apples, I might actually die,” Adrian informs you as the song comes to a fading close, starting to transition into the next one. When you laugh, he smiles, insisting, “No, seriously! Did you know that if you eat, like, hundreds of apple seeds, you can technically die of cyanide poisoning?”

“Then don’t eat hundreds of apple seeds?” you suggest. “Seems simple enough to avoid.”

“No, no, that’s my point,” Adrian tells you. “You won’t be able to stop me! I will eat hundreds of apples and hundreds of apple seeds and—”

“Adrian!” you shout, hand shooting out to grab onto his forearm on instinct, your other hand flying upwards in an aborted motion towards the windshield—

—And towards the massive tractor trailer truck that has come barreling out of the southbound lane, crossing the yellow line to head straight for Adrian’s little four-door replacement for the Vigilantemobile.

“Shit, shit, shit—” Adrian curses, cutting the wheel so hard to one side that the car spins to the side. “Hold on—”

You grip his arm tighter, bracing yourself in your seat as the world outside blurs and Adrian fights to avoid getting crushed by the truck and—

There’s an impact at the front of the car that jars you, and then suddenly you have the stomach-dropping sensation of weightlessness. You tighten your hold on Adrian’s forearm in the last moments you have, the world flipping end over end outside the windows, before everything goes dark.

— — — — —

Something keeps hitting you in the face.

You frown, scrunching your face up a little bit. When you try to lift your hand to swat whatever it is away, you realize you can’t manage to move your arm.

As you’re waking up, coherence slinks in a little bit at a time. The pain comes in in waves as your body starts recognizing it, processing that there is a throb in your skull, a burning in your back and legs, and a piercing, radiating agony high on your chest.

Whatever is hitting you in the face strikes a little harder this time, and you groan, forcing your eyes open.

The entire world is upside-down. Adrian’s face fills your vision, and you blink again, disoriented, as his hands grasp your face and his forehead comes to rest against yours, just— in reverse, because he’s upside-down—

Or you are, you realize, because you’re still buckled into your passenger seat in the turned-over car, flipped on its roof. You shift, and the pain in your chest and back explode.

“Hey, hey, don’t move, stop moving,” Adrian insists. “It’s fine, you’re fine, you just— You gotta stop moving, okay? Or it’s just gonna hurt worse, but— I am going to get you out of here, okay?”

Your head spins, thoughts coming through foggily. His words are difficult to process, but your body responds to his intensity, to the panic he’s just barely keeping a lid on, to the terror that’s clear across every line of his face despite his attempts to keep you calm.

Looking more closely at his face, you realize one of the lenses of his glasses is gone, shattered out of the frame, and there’s blood on his face, splattered across his cheek on the right and dripping from a cut on his temple on the left.

“You’re hurt,” you mumble, your throat feeling sore and rasping. Had you been screaming? You don’t even remember; the last thing you remember is the truck coming at you, Adrian trying to avoid it, and then, just— nothing. “Are you okay?”

Adrian huffs a half-hysterical breath of a laugh, though you can’t help but feel that he’s not finding this particularly funny. “Am I okay? Am—” He takes a steadying breath, holds your upside-down face between his palms again. You’re starting to get even dizzier, looking at everything from your wrong angle while your head hurts and your body throbs with pain. “Yeah, I’m okay. Nothing we can’t stitch up, right?”

You try to move your arm again, wanting to wipe the blood off of his face, but the pain in your chest doubles, triples, and you cry out in a whine you bite back, hating how it sounds ripping out of you.

“Stop— Stop moving,” he repeats, firm, looking you right in the eye. “I’m—” He looks around, as if he’ll miraculously find something that will help him, before he lands on his cellphone, dangling from its mount precariously, just as upside-down as you are. “Okay, I’m calling for help, we’ll get you out, okay?”

If Adrian’s calling for help, that means whatever it is that he’s panicking about isn’t something he can handle, isn’t a problem he can solve.

He’s fumbling with his phone, blood-slick fingers sliding on the screen as he taps into an emergency call, and he’s distracted enough to give you time to look down— or, rather, up at yourself.

You realize immediately why you can’t move, why the pain is there. A massive fragment of glass— maybe from your windshield, maybe from the truck, you can’t tell— has shattered off and broken its way into you, right through the space above your collarbone and through, pinning you to the seat. You twitch your fingers, and all the muscles burn; one arm is trapped by the glass, unable to move while it’s stuck in you, and the other is pinned by the twisted-up seatbelt, keeping it caught at a hard angle against your chest.

Your legs are caught above you, the blood flow coming down. You see more blood on yourself than you think you ever have before, and your spinning vision starts tunneling into blackness.

“Adrian,” you mumble, a wave of dizziness washing through your body. You can feel unconsciousness coming this time, and you see his wide, terrified eyes land on you just as you manage to tell him, “I don’t feel good.”

“Hey, you have to stay awake, though,” Adrian insists. “Gotta stay with me, can’t go anywhere else, right?”

“Mm,” you agree, letting your eyes drift closed. It’s easier than watching the world spin and tunnel and splotch out the way it is.

“Hey, hey, look at me— Look at me,” he begs you, but you can’t. It kills you that you can’t do what he wants, especially when he’s asking so desperately, and when you know it’s what you need to do, but you just can’t manage it. You’re not even sure where your eyes are anymore; everything becomes nothing again with a sigh.

— — — — —

This time, when you wake up, everything feels soft.

It’s like you’re inside of a cloud. You have a weightless feeling that’s much nicer than the one you’d felt in the car— and even thinking of the accident, horrifying and traumatic as it is— was?— doesn’t bring you any panic. You’re just floaty, foggy, all the pain and panic and fear held further than arm’s length away.

Shifting, you realize everything really is soft. You’re laying someplace soft; your head is on something soft; something soft has been placed over you.

The only thing that isn’t soft is whatever’s held tight in your hand.

You squeeze your fingers around the shape and feel it squeeze back. A smile comes onto your face automatically, and you hum, drifting off again.

— — — — —

This time, you’re a little more coherent as you start coming into consciousness.

You manage to open your eyes this time, blinking sleepily upwards towards a grey-and-green speckled ceiling. It reminds you of a cardinal’s egg. It’s also definitely unfamiliar, and you turn your head just enough to feel the crinkling of a pillowcase beneath your cheek.

The hand in yours tightens, and you blink down to find Adrian’s fingers woven into yours, sitting in a chair scooted up to your bedside, slumped over the edge of your mattress. His head is pillowed on your thigh as he sleeps bent over. The position looks incredibly uncomfortable.

You reach down, your fingertips just barely grazing a pad of gauze that’s been taped over his temple where you remember he’d been bleeding from. He’s wearing a hospital gown, and a thin white hospital robe thrown over it. A tan blanket is draped over his shoulders; you wonder who else has been here, how long it’s been.

Glancing down at yourself, you see that you’ve been positioned sitting halfway-up, and that your torso is heavily bandaged. One of your arms has been immobilized against your chest, but the other is free to move; reaching up, you find a bandage on your head, too— though probing around it makes your skull throb, so you stop searching out the wound after a second.

Instead, you reach down towards Adrian again. He’s got his backup glasses on, though they’re smushed at a sideways angle with how his face is pressed into your thigh over your blankets; when you let your hand rest on his head, lightly running through his dark curls, he stirs only a little bit, humming contentedly, a smile slipping onto his face even in sleep.

Soft, you whisper, “Adrian,” and he just shifts again, cracking a yawn against your thigh. “Adrian? You shouldn’t lay like that if you’re hurt.”

“Whuh?” he mumbles, confused, blinking his eyes open. He seems lost for a moment— and then you see the instant he remembers everything that happens.

Jolting upright, his hands are on you in an instant, slipping from your hold so he can frame your face between his palms, then skate down over your chest. You can only assume he’s already done this countless times, but you still allow him to do it again, to take inventory of you, just like you have with each other every time you’ve been hurt in a fight or an accident or just doing something goofy.

“I’m okay,” you tell him, when he’s straightening your blankets, fidgeting with them over your legs.

He scoffs, turning to look at you over the top edge of his glasses. “You are not okay, I— I will be the judge of when you are okay, and when you’re— you’re in the hospital after I saw— I watched them—” His words come to a stammering stop, and he frowns down at his hands before fiddling with the blankets again. “I’m just saying, you were not okay, you are not okay—”

“I will be okay?” you interrupt.

With how stressed and on-edge he clearly is, it’s a risky move, but you earn the small huff and the smile that you’re angling for.

“Yeah,” he tells you, the wind leaving his sails, sitting heavily on the edge of your bed. “They all kept saying you’ll be just fine. I just—” He waves one hand vaguely through the air. “Seeing that—” His voice breaks, and he curses, “Shit—”

“It’s okay,” you promise him. He shakes his head, so you reach out with your good hand, catching his in yours. “Hey, it is. I swear. We’re both here, aren’t we?”

His eyes are bloodshot, his face flushing. You can see the shine of tears welling up before he swallows thickly and looks down at your joined hands, taking a shaking breath, in and out in tremors.

“You nearly weren’t,” Adrian mumbles. “It should’ve been—”

“Stop,” you interrupt him. “Stop right there. It’s bad enough you’re hurt—”

“I’m not hurt—”

You used your joined hands to point right at his temple. “Then what’s this? And I’m sure that’s not everything, Adrian. You have to tell me when you’re hurt. That’s the deal, remember? We’re honest with each other.”

“This is different,” Adrian insists.

“How?”

“I don’t— I don’t know, it just is,” Adrian says. “I was the one driving—”

“It’s not your fault,” you tell him. He’s about to protest, but you cut him off with, “No, it’s not your fault. The truck came at us. You tried to get us out of the way— we’d probably be dead if you didn’t.”

It seems like he’s still going to argue, for a moment, but your last words draw him up short. Instead, he shivers a little, then tilts towards you.

“Come here,” you tell him, releasing his hand so you can wrap your arm around him instead. He’s ginger, gentle, trying not to hurt you as he curls up into your side. You rub his back, kissing the top of his head; he winds his arm around you, slow and easy, waiting for a wince from you that never comes.

“I should be comforting you,” he mumbles into your throat.

“You are comforting me.” You kiss the top of his head again, letting your lips linger there as you murmur, “Thanks for saving my life.”

He sniffles. You feel his chest hitch.

“Thanks for saving mine,” he says, muffled by your skin, growing humid and slick with his tears.

You press your cheek to the top of his head, just holding him for a while. When he’s able to calm down, he lifts his head a little, shuffles you around a bit, slow and steady with you as he guides you to rest against his chest instead. His fingertips trace nonsense patterns into your uninjured shoulder, and you yawn, letting yourself relax.

After a moment, you realize, “Wait— Where’s your bed?”

“Down the hall,” Adrian tells you in a sleepy murmur.

“Wh— Adrian.” You shift a little, but Adrian doesn’t let you sit up. “You should be in your own bed, you’re going to hurt yourself—”

His grip tightens on you. “Do you want me to leave?”

You think about it for a moment, and he did promise to be honest, and he doesn’t seem to be in pain, so—

“No,” you confess.

“Good.” He snuggles back in. “Just relax, okay? Everything’s going to be fine.”

“See?” you tell him. “You’re right. It will be.”

[stupid-4-you]

I could not fight the voices, they have won soooo—what about Medic, Spy (I hate him/j) and/or Engineer x secret higher-up male reader (only Scout gets the absolutely whipped reader™️ [deluxe edition])?

This time; they’re pretty good at keeping their work confidential and conducting themselves in a personable, yet efficient manner… though still secretly dating one of the mercenaries. Their lover gets to see a whole new side of reader (far less rigid, quiet and surprisingly doting) that nobody else gets to see, reader is very much smitten; though no-one is allowed to see that (they don’t talk about the ins and outs of their job, only would give slight info they deem relatively “unimportant” when they occasionally complain about work) and will only let down their guard when the coast is clear. Tired cuddles and conversation has changed my brain for the better :)

I know what you might be saying, isn’t this just like your last request? Um, no… (I’m sleep deprived)

- Lurker Anon

P.s. make sure to take care of yourself and pace out your workflow chef 🗣️

Being their superior

Here ya go, pookie. They're all a bit shorter than the Scout version, just due to the fact that there's not just one character. I also decided to focus more on the relationship aspect rather than the job aspect for these three.

Medic, Spy, and Engineer x male!reader (separate)

Fluff, a bit of spice in Engie's part (i couldn't help myself, he's my wife, okay?)

Medic:

“Give that back, Medic. It’s confidential.”

Medic grinned at you, holding the file above your head as if trying to get you to reach for it. You didn’t take the bait, as you were already keenly aware of the things he did to get reactions out of you. After a moment, he sighed, shrugging and placing the file down in your hands before going back to your medical examination. You’d been writing something down as he was looking you over, and he couldn’t help but want to tease you.

“You are no fun, mein Taube.” He said, letting out a soft laugh. “Alright, zhat concludes your examination. Vould you like anything extra done? I have quite a few altered organs just vaiting around for a new home, if you’d volunteer?” 

You sighed, closing the file in your hands after making sure nothing in it had gone missing. Shaking your head, you held a hand up in polite refusal. “Not this time, darling.”

Medic nodded, knowing you’d agree some other time, and were most likely just frustrated or flustered. “Fine, zhen. I do have one requvest, zhough.” He started, taking off his lab coat and sitting next to you. “I vould appreciate some payment for my services, is all.” He clasped his hands together, grinning at you and leaning a little closer. You knew exactly what he wanted, and it wasn’t out of the question per se, but you couldn’t help but look around for any security cameras. You’d never checked for them in Medic’s lab, surprisingly. He seemed to understand what your hesitance was about. “Ah, do not vorry, I’ve already disposed of surveillance in here. I also simply don’t enjoy zhe feeling of others watching me while I work, so zhe cameras have been gone for a vhile.”

You let out a sigh, rolling your eyes with a smile. He really wanted that kiss. “Oh, alright then.” 

“Perfect. Now zhen.” Medic adjusted his glasses, before leaning over and kissing your cheek. He tilted your head towards him, pecking your lips for a moment. “Zhank you for being such a good patient, Mein Taube.” He spoke, reaching for your hand with his and interlocking your fingers. It was sweet, how much he craved your affection. He’d been like that for a while, always so interested in what you were doing and striking up conversation. 

“Thank you for being such a good doctor, darling.” You responded, brushing your lips over his and closing your eyes. He pecked you again, before melting into you, letting out a low hum at the feeling of you against him. It was heavenly.

The two of you quickly separated though, hearing the doors to the lab be pushed open rather suddenly. 

“Ay, doc! Gettin’ impatient h- uh-” 

Scout looked at Medic, then at you, then back at the doors, then at the two of you again, before backing up slowly. “Oh. Uh.. That’s uh- I’m gonna..”

And just as quickly as he entered, Scout left, taking your dignity with him. After you processed what had just happened, you felt your face get hot, and your stomach start to feel sick.

“He’s gonna blab to the whole base, isn’t he?”

“Most certainly. I vill be right back, Leibling.”

Medic got up, grabbing his bone saw and rushing out of the lab. You decided to pretend to be blissfully ignorant to whatever Medic decided to do with Scout.

Spy:

Your shoulders relaxed the second the door was shut and locked, the familiar and comforting air of Spy’s smoking room filling your lungs as you breathed in deeply. Spy turned away from the door, facing you as he stepped forward and reached for your waist. “Ah, mon cheri, I have been waiting all day for you.” He pressed his face into your neck as he spoke, lips ghosting over your skin for a moment. “Let us get you relaxed.”

He stood up, leading you over to the nice chair. After a long day of work, he enjoyed having you on his lap, sharing a cigarette with you while you complained about your day. He simply enjoyed listening to you and having you close to him.

“Thank you, Spy.” You mumbled, letting out a deep breath as he sat down, pulling you into his lap with your back facing him, and pressing his lips to the back of your neck. You settled into his hold, feeling his hands rest on your shoulders, squeezing gently. You let out a soft sigh as he began to knead all the tension out of your shoulders. “That’s.. Oh, that’s perfect..”

You let out a soft groan, settling into Spy’s hold comfortably. 

“Now zhen, how would you like to tell me about your day, cheri?” He asked, tilting his head forward so he could see your face. His hands pulled away from your shoulders, settling for wrapping one around your waist and resting the other on the arm of the chair.

You leaned back into Spy’s chest, letting out a groan of mild frustration. Today hadn’t been that great work-wise.

“Well, to start, the report I’d submitted a few days ago had a few mistakes in it, and when I notified the Administrator of needing to correct it, she told me to rewrite it completely. I finally got around to finishing it and was about to ship it off, but as you probably know, Engineer completely blew the power earlier, and I volunteered to help Ms. Pauling fix it since Engie was in the medbay from apparently electrocuting himself. I swear, even the ones out of you that are supposed to be smart are dumb as rocks.” You took in a deep breath, before quickly adding to the end of your little rant and looking back at him. “Not you though. Obviously.”

Spy chuckled, kissing your cheek. “Yes, I assumed so.”

You then rattled on about the rest of your day, Spy listening attentively to what you were saying while occasionally commenting here or there. Halfway through you had readjusted yourself so your legs were going across Spy’s lap and dangling off the arm of the chair, your head nestled underneath his, and your hand resting on his chest. 

The two of you spent the rest of the evening in each other’s arms, talking about nothing in particular, and finding comfort within another.

You could stay like this forever.

Engineer:

Engineer looked at you with that sweet smile he always had. It was almost impossible to resist. Almost. But you were on the clock, and it was important that you kept it together. He gazed at you lovingly as he finished building a turret next to you. “Alright darlin’, that should keep you safe while you do what’cha do.” said Engie, placing his hands on his hips. He was vaguely aware of your job, with you observing everyone on the field and at the base, surveying them and writing down whatever you deemed important. But aside from that, he was pretty much clueless.

“Thank you. And don’t call me darling. Not here at least.” You replied flatly, taking in a deep breath. The area you were in was great. Honestly it’d be a good sniping spot, up high, being able to see everyone doing their own individual work while shielding yourself. You clicked your pen as Engie laughed, shaking his head.

“You n’that professionalism.. Nobody ain’t seein’ you up here, so why not let loose a little? S’not like it’ll be of too much consequence. C’mon, darlin’.” He reasoned with you, stepping closer and putting a hand on your waist. Most of the time you’d wait until you were behind closed doors to be affectionate in the slightest with Engie, but you had to admit, it was tempting. A little too tempting. You sighed, tucking your pen in your pocket and placing a hand on Engie's shoulder.

“I- I can’t. It could cost me my job, if anyone finds out about.. This.” You gestured between you and Engie, cheeks flushing. He reached up, holding the side of your face. You leaned into his hold despite yourself, eyes closing at his tender touch.

“Okay. I won’t force you t’do anythin’ at all, but I at least just want you t’know I love you, and I want you.” You had to stifle a small laugh, raising an eyebrow.

“You want me?” His own cheeks flushed, and he shook his head. “Not like that, well- yes like that, but that’s not the point I’m try’na make. The- the point is, I care about’cha, and I just wanna have you by my side.” His comforting grin melted into an expression of worry, tilting his head as he looked up at you. “And seein’ you uptight all the time, like you think somethin’s gonna appear outta nowhere and take you away.. It’s a little concernin’ sometimes. Just makes me wanna hold you and tell you it’ll be alright. Is’sat too much to ask?”

You sighed, feeling your usually so strong resolve slipping. Oh, who were you kidding? That ‘strong resolve’ evaporated the second Engie put his hand on your waist. You held his face, caressing his cheek for a moment before rolling your eyes, leaning down and pressing your lips to his. Fuck it, you’d deal with the consequences later if you were somehow being watched, but for now, you just wanted to kiss your darling southern gentleman right here. He leaned up into the kiss, hands gripping onto you a little tighter. He let out a wistful sigh as soon as you parted, a lazy smile creeping up his cheeks as you parted. “Good boy.”

One of Engie's hands gently grabbed the back of your head, bringing you back down to kiss him again. “There’s my good boy..” He mumbled softly against your lips, groaning as you grabbed onto him. "You were right though. I did want ya. Want'cha real bad.." He took in a shaky breath, that telltale sign of how needy he was for you. His hand on your waist traveled down to your ass, giving it a good squeeze. "But I'm willin' t'wait. I know ya don't like bein' out in the open, and who am I to disrespect that?" He let go, hand returning to your waist.

Just for a moment, your duties and stress were forgotten. But just as quickly as it went, it came back. You gently pushed him away, clearing your throat. 

“Alright, get back to work before I have to write you up for unprofessionalism.” You grumbled, knocking your fist against his hard hat. Engie chuckled softly in return, not bothering to do anything about it.

“M’kay, alright. Yes sir.”

[stupid-4-you]

hello is this mcdonalds?

great! can i order sick headcannons with the mercs (reader is the sick one. idk how else to clarify that)

okay coolio bye then

-apple anon ✌️

haha imagine being sick. enjoy covid, apple :)

(disclaimer, i'm not mean to anyone else. I just know apple IRL.)

When you're sick - headcanons

All the mercs (+ Ms. Pauling) x G/N reader

(I added Pilot because pretending my OC is a canon character is fun.)

Fluff

Scout:

Ok, let's be honest, you aren't getting a lot in terms of anything genuinely helpful to your health.

He'll sit at the edge of your bed and keep you company, rattling off about his day or the current happening around the base.

He lived with seven older brothers, thus naturally developed a pretty good immune system. He'll snuggle with and kiss you all over. He'll get under the covers, too. He's taking a nap there. You don't get to kick him out. Here's there forever now.

Will get you a juice or something, but don't expect him to get you anything you'd need to cook.

Soldier:

Sick?? You shouldn't be sick!! It's those damn communists contaminating the water supply, he swears by it.

Nonetheless, he will be sure to stay by your side and give you an honorable burial if you were to perish. Not that you will! You're a strong american man (regardless of your nationality. or gender. just go with it, it'll make him happy.), and he knows you'll pull through.

Stands at the foot of your bed doing surveillance. You're at your most vulnerable, so he has to keep watch!!

He cannot cook. Good lord he cannot cook. He'll try though for you, but you better expect it to taste or look horrible.

Pyro:

Will prance to your room, move all of their stuff in there, and have sleepovers with you until you're better.

They'll color with you, bring you snacks and treats, and spend a lot of time with you in general.

They don't really get sick themself, partially due to wearing the mask all the time, so they don't know exactly how to take care of you on the practical side of things, but they'll grab you anything you want if you ask them!!

Demoman:

He knows a lot about being sick. Mainly due to hangovers, but he's pretty experienced in terms of getting sick, so he knows what to do in a lot of cases.

He's making you a hot toddy if your throat is sore. (He's making one for himself too.)

Will offer a bunch of weird remedies that he swears by, which only a handful usually work. His eagerness to help you out usually wins over you though, so you end up trying them.

Heavy:

I think he would be one of the best to care for you. He took care of his family when he lived with them (and still visits!), so he'd for sure know exactly what to do for you.

Makes a mean soup. It's his mother's recipe, so you better compliment it.

Can and will pick you up and carry you to other rooms if you want a change of scenery. He doesn't much care about getting sick himself, and he can usually power through it if it spreads to him, so don't worry about giving him your germs. Just don't kiss him or anything, he's not that interested in getting sick.

Will take you to Medic if he thinks it's getting bad.

Engineer:

Okay, this might be a controversial take, but I think he'd be absolute dogwater at taking care of you.

MAN CAN'T EVEN GET UP FOR A GLASS OF WATER FOR HIMSELF IF HE'S WORKING, AND YOU EXPECT HIM TO TAKE CARE OF A WHOLE 'NOTHER PERSON???

Okay, he'll try.

He'll talk to Medic to see what can be done for you, might move some of the stuff he's tinkering on so you can spend time with him if you want, He might make you a snack if he has the time, but probably not much more than that.

He genuinely cares about you, but he doesn't exactly have the resources or time to be with you the whole duration of your sickness.

Medic:

Sick? Under his watch? Impossible. The second you start showing symptoms of anything, no matter how small, he is testing you for everything under the sun.

Be prepared to spend ninety percent of your time in the medbay, because he's running tests on you like there's no tomorrow.

Will give you so many pills or random liquids to down, and not tell you what a single one does.

He's definitely giving you a remedy of his own invention that may or may not be banned in multiple US states.

Sniper:

Now this is a man who can take care of you when you're sick.

He has a lot of knowledge on how to help, because his mother would always talk about what she was doing or making to help him feel better whenever he was sick growing up.

He knows (and can probably cook) whatever meals will help get your energy back, he knows what medicine to get from Medic, and he'll do his best to make you all comfy cozy.

He'll probably call his parents if he doesn't know what to do in a specific case, as he doesn't really want you spending too much time in the medbay. It's just overly sterile and serious in there, and he knows that a comforting atmosphere can be better for trying to recover from being sick.

Spy:

He will reluctantly bring you a few things, but do not expect him to spend time with you.

He is wearing a facemask when entering your room, giving a brief greeting while bringing you food or something, and leaving. If you ask him to stay, he will not.

I feel like he would have mildly germaphobic tendencies, just based on how clean he tries to keep on a regular basis.

The only reason he even bothers to bring you anything is because he thinks you're the least annoying and wouldn't survive being around everyone else if you died.

A little melodramatic, but he's got the spirit.

Ms. Pauling:

Let's be honest, she wouldn't have the time to take care of you.

She'll make an effort to tell the others to make sure you're doing okay and are fed and given proper care, but she probably won't be able to do anything past that.

WE STILL LOVE HER THOUGH.

Pilot:

Pilot is a little bit of a mess, but will try his best.

He usually makes food for everyone when nobody wants prepackaged meals, so he's got quite a bit of soup-making experience.

Is the comforting king. Will let you lay your head in his lap and sleep while he reads or writes. Will gently play with your hair if you want him to.

He'll get you a ginger ale and swear that it helps. It tastes good, but it's unclear if it actually helps with nausea or a sore throat.

Let him kiss you. He will get so sick, but he wants to kiss you so bad. He doesn't care that he's getting your germs, he just wants to comfort you.

[stupid-4-you]

Nothing to be Embarrassed About - Engineer x Reader

pt 2 of a request! Reader has a collection of stuffed animals that they've put off showing anyone else, even their partner, Engie. :] The Sniper version is here!

Contains: 654 words, g/n reader, established relationship, too many nicknames from engie, fluff

    No one knew what the inside of your room was like. (If Spy did, he never mentioned it.) Engie had to admit he was curious, even before you two started dating. After you two became an item and were learning more about each other, he was surprised you still seemed touchy about your room. As curious as he was, he thought it might be rude to ask to go in if you never offered. He’s a gentleman.

He did drop a few hints here and there, usually in the form of gifting you decorations.

“Hey, sweet pea. I made a little somethin’ for ya,” he said with a smile. He held out his hand to you, showing off a metal flower, made of wire and nuts soldered together with care. “Thought it’d make a nice decoration in yer room.”

But, he still didn’t pry into your room, just waited until you approached him first, looking sheepish.

“Hey, hun. Uh… would you wanna hang out in my room for a bit? I, uh, got the chance to clean up in there,” you mumbled.

He doesn’t bother to hide the big smile on his face.

“Yeah! I been wonderin’ when you were gonna invite me around. It’s about time, ain’t it?” He said lightheartedly, patting your shoulder. “Lead the way, pardner.”

His smile was infectious to you, despite your nerves. You bit your lip as you walked ahead, telling yourself surely this would go over fine. You were making a big deal out of nothing… probably. (Even though keeping stuffed animals is childish and embarrassing.) Your thoughts oscillated between comforting and berating.

“…Ya alright, darlin’? Your actin’ like yer in touble or somethin’,” Engie pointed out, tilting his head at you.

You both came to a stop in front of your doorway, and you turned to him with a shrug and too-big smile.

“It’s nothing! It’s just different for me! But, uh, it’s no big deal, really, let’s just head in, right?” You replied.

You held open the door for him, avoiding eye contact as he stepped inside. You shut the door quietly behind him and waited for the inevitable comment about your stuffed animals. Your eyes flicked to him, but he wasn’t even looking at your bed first. He was looking at your dresser, the posters on your wall, and the desk still littered with papers and books.

“Well, you sure made yourself comfortable in here! Aw, it suits you,” he commented, eyes wandering. Then he noticed the mountain of plushies.

“Woah! I didn’t know you liked stuffed animals so much. Were you hidin’ ‘em from us?” He asked half-jokingly, turning to you. His expression fell a little upon seeing your own. You looked so timid.

“Oh. Y’were,” he realized softly. He stepped closer and held your hand in his.

“I’m sorry, darlin’. Is that why you don’t let anyone in yer room?”

You nodded, squeezing his hand and looking at him gratefully.

“Yeah. I mean, I’m a grown adult collecting kids toys because I think they’re cute… I doubt that would go over well. I didn’t want to hear their teasing about it.”

“Don’t be ridiculous, sweetheart! It’s nothin’ to be embarrassed about. Have ya seen Pyro’s room?”

“Well, yeah, but, Pyro is… Pyro. I don’t know, I didn’t want it to make you see me any differently,” you reasoned.

“Aww, you know I ain’t like that, sugar cube,” he said, “It don’t matter to me whatever ya like. I know what kinda person you are, and yer a good one. Besides, I think they’re cute anyhow.”

“You do?” you asked, perking up.

“Sure. And now I know another thing I can getcha for yer room,” He said with a smile.

You smiled, feeling warm from all his sweet words. You leaned in and kissed his cheek, and you might have seen his face turn a little pinker.

“Thanks, honey.”

“Don’t mention it, sweetheart.”

Extra HCs

He would be so honored, genuinely, if you gave him a stuffed animal. ESPECIALLY if its clearly thoughtful, like something you knew he would like. He will protect it for ever and ever

He does have to carve out a little space for himself on your bed when he sleeps over in your room. He doesn't wanna squish them :( (+ they aren't as comfortable for sleeping on...)

Has a habit of being polite to your stuffed animals. They're just little guys. Says "scuse me lil' buddy" when he sets one aside

[stupid-4-you]

EPIC SCOUT X A KIND! READER

Hello guys!! This one was requested by @thoughtfulcandydeer and it was too cute not to do!! Hope you enjoy!!

-Matthew is a very sharply edged person. I feel like he needs someone who is the opposite of him to mellow out his seriousness. At first, he didn’t want to like you. Dating him could put you at risk, what with all the fighting he does. Often ignoring your advances or kindness and pushing you aside. Whether you got the hint or not, you still keep talking to him. And at some point, he starts talking back. Chuckling at your comments or giving you a slight smile whenever you complimented him on his skills. You are one of the first people he isn’t angry or cold around. Being with you ends up as a breather from the seriousness of his job. Just coming back to the base and talking with you helps him relax. Even if you do most of the talking.

-He is pretty protective. Whether you work as a mercenary or not. As a mercenary, he knows you can take care of yourself, but he is not letting you fight with him when it comes to his much larger enemies. As a civilian, you do not know what his job is. Either way, he seems to keep some part of him closed off. But when you are in a deep sleep at night, he does give in to his urges and cuddles you. Just pulls your back against his chest and has his arms over your stomach. A vulnerable side to him that he can’t show you. That he is terrified to show you. He wants you in his life, sure, but you can also get really hurt. You are the perfect piece of leverage. By the morning, you didn’t even know he held you most of the night. He was good at hiding it.

-Now, if this was the opposite and you liked cuddling him? Oh man. Just wrapping around him or laying your head in his lap while you two decompress. He will comb through your hair if you ask and depending on how close you two are. I like to imagine that he smells clean, at least before a fight. Like laundry detergent or a men’s deodorant or cologne. I also think that you can spot the small brown moles that spread out along his neck and back while laying your head on his shoulder. Sometimes, you gotta watch for injuries. Massage his back, god only knows the amount of knots he has.

-You want to tell him about that thing you’ve been so into lately? You had a long day and you are happy to see him? Something good happened to you today? He will listen. Very subtle about showing how he finds it cute when you get excited over anything. Just nods and smiles at you as you go on. Lets you put a hand on his arm or shoulder as you speak, maybe he will put an arm around you.

-Some of his fights end with him either being at a tie or nearly losing, so he can come back looking pretty rough. The other members of the Blu team on Sawmill will watch him walk back to the safe room or their hideout and try to aide him. Usually, he ignores them. He can handle himself! But, when he comes back to you? And you fuss all over him? Oh yeah, he’s gonna let you take care of him. He doesn’t say anything as you take him to his bed and start cleaning the blood off him. He would never admit that he likes it, but sometimes you can catch a small smile from him while you patch him up. PLEASE GIVE HIM SOME KISSES AFTERWARDS, THAT FACADE WILL FADE REAL QUICK AND HE WILL GET FLUSTERED.

-He has never dated before. I have this headcanon that he has always had trouble dating anyone before defeated the Red team single-handedly because of one, he didn’t think of dating much and two, he would get nervous. His confidence went way up after he got his powers. So, you are mostly likely the first real relationship he has been in. He has a hard time doing normal relationship stuff due to his job. Dates get put off often and he is also bad when it comes to challenges or progressing in the relationship. He’s not the best communicator, like any other Scout.

-A huge sucker for compliments and will take them very much to heart. You gush about how awesome he was taking on multiple guys at once or how good he is at fighting. He gives a small smile and his chest kind of swells with pride. He knows he is good at what he does, but to have someone tell him or praise him like that? You just stroke his confidence. Though, save the words for after the battle. He is a totally different person during the mission. He doesn’t want the enemy to catch him off guard or run the risk of you getting hurt.

-Have you seen that Snapcube audio where the guy goes, “I’m going to kill the next person I see, I swear to God.” And then a female voice comes in and says, “Hey!! Hi!! I’m so happy to see you!!” And then he softens up and goes, “…hey! Oh my god.” That’s you two in a nutshell.

[stupid-4-you]

Not So Light Hearted Teasing

Words: 225

Request: Hello!! I am a HUGEEE fan of your works!! Could I have please request Scout with a reader who has been made fun of most of their life (by former classmates, family, etc.) and now they take any lighthearted teasing personal? It’s something I am trying to work on, but I still have my moments. Thank you!

Scout is… a lot. He’s loud, annoying to everyone and you’re not safe. You’re cautious, and it’s not long until he turns to you.

The joke falls flat when everyone notices how you freeze up or quietly withdraw, he definitely notices. He watches how you react.

The jokes start small, calling you a dork for how you do something, poking fun at how you walk etc.

They’re not cruel, not by any means, but they eventually hit a nerve causing your walls to slam up.

Whether you lash out at him or go quiet and distant, Scout becomes confused then concerned. “Whoa, hey— did I mess up? C’mon it wasn’t meant to be mean, I swear dude.”

But when he finally learns about your past—being mocked and not knowing when people were "just kidding." Scout became weirdly serious.

He actually understands, much more than you’d expect. Being the youngest, his brothers ragging on him endlessly, even after all those years those words still stung.

So after that he tries to be mindful, he still jokes and some might be too much, but he’s constantly checking for a reaction.

“Okay, real talk, if I say somethin’ dumb and it hurts, just say ‘hey, not funny’, alright? I’ll drop it.”

His given nicknames might come off as platonic to others but you two know, such as ‘champ.’

[stupid-4-you]

Tf2 x MALE READER? OF SCOUT?! Bro, where have you been? I’ve been starving over here (in all seriousness though—absolute peak).

How about this: Scout, Medic, and Engineer (separately though, if you only want to do one—Scout) x male reader that’s secretly one of the higher-ups, initially was sent to make sure the mercenaries were doing what they were supposed to on and off the battlefield; now they’re absolutely whipped for their mercenary of choice (I’m talking—first thing after giving a monthly report that totally is reliable and not overlooking nearly all infractions, reader’s heading back to base to spend time with his totally not boyfriend). Maybe throw some possible playful banter about fraternizing since they absolutely told the secret to their partner? Honestly, you’re the chef man so I’m not picky

If I can name myself, I’ll try lurker anon (I will be back 🤫)

well well well lurker anon, it's good to know I have an audience. coming right up!

Just Scout for now, as I don't wanna get too overwhelmed.

"Vital to the team."

Scout x Male!reader

Fluff

Scout is a bit of an asshole (affectionately)

Drabble

“So what’d that report say, anyhow?”

Scout asked, looking over your shoulder as you placed your own copy of the monthly merc report into a file and shoved it under your bed. You’d organize later.

“You know I can’t tell you that, Scout.” You replied, shooing Scout away from your bed as he not-so-sneakily tried to snoop around. He had a tendency to follow you around. At first it was just because you were new and interesting, but as the months went by, it was clear it was because he had a big fat crush on you. Good thing you reciprocated. The only thing was, it was mildly dangerous for you to be in a relationship with him. The Administrator had hired you to discreetly keep an eye on all the mercs in a more personal sense, just making sure they were following protocol and keeping it professional. There was just one problem.

“C’mon babe. Please? I’m askin’ super nicely here, you gotta tell! I’ll make it up to ya if you do?” Scout’s puppy eyes. His dumb stupid puppy eyes were your problem. He and his tendency to pry into everything, mixed with you having a horrible weakness for him, equaled bad news if this was ever found out. He knew practically everything about your job, aside from the specifics of your reports. And here was the last confidential thing you had, about to become very un-confidential. You couldn’t help but sigh, reaching back under your bed and grabbing the file, pulling out the paper and shoving it into Scout’s chest. “Alright! Thanks sweetheart. Let’s see here…”

Dumb stupid Scout and his dumb stupid petnames and his dumb stupid smile.

“I hope you realize I’ll have to kill you if you blab about this to anyone, right?” You said, crossing your arms. Scout handed the paper back to you after pretending to skim through it, obviously wanting you to read it aloud. Right. You forgot he could barely read. Yet somehow, that made him cuter to you. Your dignity would never survive this relationship.

“Eh, that’s what respawn machines are for. Anyway, what does it say about me?” Your face flushed and you looked down at the paper with a scowl. You really didn’t want to have to read that aloud. You were more or less truthful about every merc’s behaviors and whatnot, but there were a few… exceptions... That you made when talking about Scout. He poked your shoulder, grinning at you. “Look at them blushin’ cheeks! You really played it up for me, didn’t’cha? C’mon boy, I’m invested now. Get- get to readin’ already! Go on!”

You took in a deep breath, holding the report so tightly it crinkled the paper. Clearing your throat and ignoring the dog-like manner as to which Scout addressed you with, you read aloud. “And on the subject of Scout, he has been an exceptional part of the team, as always. He has done a lot for the team this month, both in personal and professional terms. He is one of the most important and useful parts of the team, being helpful, assertive, and in general boosts team morale. In my professional opinion, I would say he is vital to the team, and deserves recognition for it.”

You stopped there, not even bothering to look at your boyfriend in the face. You knew you’d already given him enough of an ego boost. He let out a soft chuckle. 

“Damn, babe. You’re- you’re really down bad, aren’t’cha? I’ll agree that I’m all of those things ya said, but uh.. You sure you ain’t breakin’ any rules, butterin’ me up like that? In that fancy way’uh speakin’ as well. Ha.” You set the report down on your bed, burying your face in your hands. Scout’s grip found your waist, pulling you close and looking at you with a sly smile. You wanted to punch his pretty face for getting all high and mighty, but you were the one that let this happen in the first place. Scout pried your hands away from clutching at your face, leaning in a little closer as he looked at you. “Though uh. Now that I know the kinda stuff you’re talkin’ about, it’s makin’ me feel like I’m doing somethin’ I’m not supposed to, gettin’ all close with you like this.” He pressed a kiss against your cheek, nuzzling his face against your neck and laughing again. “Really though, I should be reportin’ you for this behavior. Do we have an HR department? This uh- This power imbalance is a little unfair, don’t’cha think? With you bein' such a big n' important business man, givin’ messages straight to the top. And then there's me just being a little guy, y’know? It’s a little manipulative!” He teased, knowing just how to get under your skin. Like always. You knew he wasn’t being serious, but you couldn’t help but internally groan whenever he’d mention you being a higher-up. “Seriously, somethin’ oughtta be done about this! Would’ya write a letter to the top for me? They should probably hear about this.”

“I can and will get you fired, Scout.” You spoke flatly, nudging him away. He stepped back, walking around you and grabbing your waist from the other side.

“Yeah, like you’ll ever do that. I’m “vital to the team”, remember? Said it yourself.” 

“I hope you know I hate you.”

Scout smiled, wrapping his arm around your waist and kissing your shoulder. “Yeah yeah. Love you too.”

[stupid-4-you]

WAHHHH REQUESTS ARE OPEN!!!

May I pretty please request for an Frankenstein!gender neutral!reader x RED Scout? Like their some creation by medic to be an assistant but Scout constantly tries to hit on them or be their friend but they just… don’t get it. Preferably romantic please! <3

Heyyy, so this isn’t my best work. Sorry. But I tried! :p

This is based off of how the book and movie Frankenstein’s personality was. The reader adopts most of those traits. I rewatched Frankenstein for this.

Red!Scout x Frankenstein!Reader

“Now, now, it’s alright. You are perfectly fine.” He hushed you, patting your shoulder.

You whined like a kicked dog, holding your arms to your bare chest. He made a noise when he realized and went behind the curtain. Nice, clean white scrubs in his hands.

“Zis will be your temporary uniform. Not ze best, but it vil do!” He said as you tried to slip into the garments.

After some explanation as to how to put on the clothes, you were finally warm again. The soft fabric on your aching skin. Deep sores where your new elbows were sewn into your old shoulders. You looked around. You whimpered, unable to express disdain otherwise. Spots in your memory prevented you from remembering how to speak. You nodded your head repetitively at the room.

“Don’t vorry! You aren’t in any danger. You are in a laboratory. Do you know what that is?” His bloody hands held your cold ones.

Pulling you up to a stance. Toes only holding you up. Afraid to change your footing in case you fall. You only shook your head.

“Memory is still foggy. Hm. Fret not, mein kind, ve have plenty of time before you go off onto the field!”

You looked more puzzled than before.

“I brought you back to life for a special purpose. You get ze privilege to relive life once again! As my assistant.” The snap of his latex gloves was heard as he pulled them on.

“Zis will be your new home!”

-Scout didn’t know what it was. One day, you appeared in the kitchen when he was grabbing some Bonk! for the next fight. Towering high above his head. Your legs were pierced with thick black threading, holding together discolored flesh pieced into thighs, arms, calves, fingers and a face. Followed behind you was the eclectic doctor you called your father. Scout kept his distances with Medic, of course, but he would say that they were good acquaintances. So, he was one of the first to be introduced to you. Scout took a good, long look at you before fumbling over his words. Then, he moved his hand, pausing, before reaching out to shake yours. You recoiled your hands and whimpered. You leaned back into your “father” and looked at him, lips downturned.

Medic clicked his tongue. His cherry red gloves patted your gown covered back.

“It’s alright! Scout is ze least harmful person you vill meet here.”

“Hey!” His pale brown brows furrowed, “who, or what, the hell is this?”

“My newest experiment! I reanimated ze dead into life.” He raised a finger.

It wasn’t a surprise, Medic manages to pull off more horrifying things.

“But, why?” Scout asked, eyebrow raised

“Healing is a lot of vork to do alone, especially when you keep taking my own medkits avay from me, Scout!” Your father gritted his teeth.

While the scrawnier man glared at your father, he felt a sudden grab at his hand. Scout jumped. You shook his hand hard, flailing his arm.

“Nice to meet you, Scout.” Your words were slow as if you were piecing together what to appropriately say. You sounded hoarse too. You were still learning how to talk again.

You smiled briefly before quickly changing back to your more neutral face from earlier. You continued to stare into his eyes. Eye contact. Social cues are something you are also just now learning. Scout’s eyes widened, allowing you to see the soft blue color of his irises. Silence snuffed the air.

“Ve should be going! Goodbye, Scout!”

As you were ushered along to another part of the base, Scout paused himself for a second. Cold can of Bonk! still in his bandaged hand, held at his hip. He really didn’t know what to think, but what he did know was that you were really attractive.

-Despite relearning most of what you had forgotten, you still chose not to go around the others. You didn’t know what to talk with them about or know any starters or how conversations flowed. Though, that was ok with you. You served your father and that was all that you needed to do. However, that scruffy haired boy would start talking to you. And never stop. For example, the mission began in 30 seconds. While you looked ahead, not thinking of anything particular, he slid himself into a one sided conversation. You didn’t even see him due to your height.

“So, whaddya do after all this?” And you just turn to Medic and wait for him to answer for you.

-On the field, you became like a second Medic. All your training taught you how to use the Medigun, start an Ubercharge, how to defend yourself, etc. He even taught you cues that would indicate if the other mercenaries needed to be assisted. If they called for Medic, but he wasn’t around, you would take his place. So, you would often find yourself helping out the reckless batter. Sometimes he won, sometimes he didn’t. Pocketing him, much like how Medic follows Heavy. Not because you wanted to, but because you felt like you had to. Your job was to keep people safe and healed and that was something you were adamant about. You were very reserved, cooperate and followed the rules you were given. Scout was the opposite of you; loud, cocky, risky. Scout figured a few bruises was worth it if it means he could get to know the new healer on his team that he may or may not have a crush on. Though, you throwing him over your shoulder without a warning kinda hurt his back.

-Speaking of getting hurt, you were very afraid of fire. The Blu Pyro spitting flames from the nozzle of his thrower when they caught you in a vulnerable state. You screamed shrill at the pain. It was the one thing no one ever got used to, except for maybe Pyro. This phobia got so bad to the point you feared even the smallest flame. Hiding inside one of the smaller supply rooms to recover from the fact you just burned most of your skin. Outnin the halls, Sniper’s thick voice ordered Scout to “Get bloody going!”. Scout mumbled a “whatever” before running in. Looking around the crates for an ammo box to reload his Babyface. He didn’t even notice you hiding.

“Oh, hey! What are you doin’ in here?” He smiled.

You couldn’t stop the shakes. Not looking up at him.

“What‘s the matter?” He nodded at you, brows furrowed.

Violently, your head shook. If you still had tear ducts, you would be welling up. You were so frustrated and wanted the match to end. You wanted the crazy man in the mask to be gone. Dustbowl could last forever. The floor creaked beside you.

“Hey, you’re ok. What happened?” Scout was crouched down to your level.

“Hey.” You felt a hand on your shoulder.

You looked up at him. His eyebrows lifted. His hands rubbed your dry skin.

“Fire. The fire…” That was all you could say.

You had to tend to Scout’s 3rd degree burns by the end of that round. It was worth it though, at least the Pyro stayed away from you. Scout, on the other hand…

-Usually, you and the birds were given food to eat before Medic left the lab for the night. He still thought that you would be too nervous to be around everyone all at once, so he let you stay there. Though, tonight was different. Knocking sounded from the double doors. You set down your plate of a well balanced meal, courtesy of Heavy, and walked slowly. Arms at your sides, hands and fingers up and tense. You turned the knob so quickly, the door opened itself. The silhouette of the lanky boy deterred you from your hiding spot. You had nothing to worry about. Your arms limp, holding your hands together and keeping them tight against your stomach. Eyebrows upturned.

“Oh, hey! I figured you were in here.” He smiled, setting down a small black container onto the empty silver tray you had just cleared of tools an hour ago.

Frightened at the thought of him ruining or contaminating the area somehow, you shooed the container in his hands. Looking up at your eyes, his brow raised. Then you held the box to his chest, causing him to quickly grab it.

“You want me to hold it?” He guessed.

You nodded hard. Putting your hands back down at your stomach.

“Well, I mean, sure, but I brought this for you.” He held up the container again.

You could see him holding two utensils with his thumb over the white lid. You pointed at it.

“It’s good! It was Engie’s night to cook, so it’s chicken pot pie.” He held out the container for you.

Gingerly, you grabbed it from him and he let out a short yelp. You twisted it around, side to side, up and down.

“Hey, hey, hey, woah, don’t turn it upside down, you’ll spill it,” You quickly flipped it back up and looked at him. “Open it up.”

Savory seasoning and warmth wafted in the air. It smelled nice. His hand held out the fork. You only looked at him.

“You eat it.” He explained.

You took the fork from him and started to poke at the chicken.

-Habitually, Scout started to save some extra food for you after every meal. Telling you about what went on at the table and what everyone talked about. He could tell you were curious, despite the fact you were still too nervous to join them. You even started to smile in a more natural way. Your secret meetup was cut short when Medic forgot something and went to retrieve it before bed. Scout’s nervous laughter and on-the-spot excuses were carried out the door as Medic basically intimidated him out the doors. Rubbing his eyes, Medic asked you why Scout was in here. You quickly hid the container of food behind you. But your attempts made it obvious you were doing so. His cooing and reassurance that he was not angry at you was enough for you to show him.

It suddenly all came together. Scout had a crush on you. He should’ve seen that coming. You, on the other hand, still don’t understand.

[stupid-4-you]

kiss me until it's better

Scout x Male!Reader (one mention of being gay, but no pronoun/gender mention otherwise)

Pre-established relationship

Fluff (mildly suggestive here and there?)

Drabble

Summary: You find Scout in the locker room, roughed up from a day of fighting and grumpy about Medic not doing anything to help him. You offer to help relieve his pain in your own little way.

. . .

Scout groaned softly, stretching out his back and letting out a deep sigh. Man, he needed that shower. Medic was busy with something, apparently it being more important than taking care of a few bumps and bruises from the day. Scout had a few choice words he’d like to share with Medic, but it honestly wasn’t worth it. Leaning his head back against the locker he’d just got his clothes out of, he closed his eyes, so ready to go to his room and crash for the rest of the day.

“Hey Scout.” 

His eyes snapped open, gasping out of surprise and coughing violently, having inhaled his own saliva. After a moment, he cleared his throat, looking over and seeing you.

“Uh, hey. You uh.. Ya scared me there.” He said, grinning awkwardly. “Didn’t hear ya come in. So uh- y’know, I got a little..”

“Holy crap, are you okay?” You asked, seeing his torso covered in bruises and a few cuts here and there. He’d clearly just got out of the shower, with only half his clothes on and a towel around his neck, and you’d be a liar if you said it wasn’t a pretty sight. But the bigger concern right now was why the hell he was all busted up though.

“Oh, that. Fuckin’ Medic said there were more important things to do than fix up a couple’uh nicks n’ scratches here and there. But I tell ya, he just wanted to get back at me for stealin’ that medkit earlier today! I needed it, but he decided I was well enough that I didn’t. And now he’s decided I’m well enough t’walk all this off. Buh.” Scout scoffed, crossing his arms. 

It was a little cute, how annoyed he was. You wouldn’t tease him though, he’d already been bothered enough today. You took a step towards him, reaching up and mussing up his hair, resting your other hand on his bare chest. He scoffed again, smacking away your hands. “Wh- hey, hands off the merchandise! I’m an injured man, can’t’cha see? Try’na get me all- uh..”

Scout trailed off, quieting down for once, seeing just how much in his space you’d gotten. He grinned sheepishly, as your hands slowly returned to touching him, palms resting on his waist. “..Hey there…” He mumbled as you looked at all his bruises and bumps, eyebrows knitting together in slight pity. You leaned to the side, pressing your lips softly against a bruise on his shoulder. Scout visibly shivered, one hand going to hold onto your arm. 

“Sucks that Medic won’t help you,” You muttered, knowing how the doctor got sometimes. “But maybe I could kiss it all better?” You asked, looking at Scout with a sweet type of smile that always got his heart pounding. He glanced down at himself, seeing all the different spots that would need some love. He nodded in agreement to your words.

“Y'know what? Yeah. Might do me some good.”

That was all you needed to hear before planting your lips right back on him, just enjoying how his skin felt and how he reacted to everything. You only pulled back every once in a while to survey your area to work with, before going back to pressing light and loving kisses all over his torso and arms. You were careful, trying to make sure not to hurt him at all. Though judging by the occasional soft whimpers you pulled from him, you could stand to be a little gentler. But judging by where you were kissing whenever Scout would quietly whine, it was clear that those little noises weren’t from pain. He mumbled out quite a few words as you worked, though most of them inaudible. He wasn’t a shy guy in the slightest, but he tended to be just a little bashful whenever he was the one receiving all the affection. Thankfully he’d stopped calling you gay every time you’d kiss him, or else right now might be a little unbearable.

“Shit, sweetheart.. You know just how t- mmh.. to make a guy flustered. Seriously.. The way your lips feel.. Ugh. Heaven.” He chuckled softly, closing his eyes and resting his head back against the locker. He breathed in slowly, just enjoying the way you trailed kisses all over his body. After another minute or so, he cleared his throat, standing up straight and nudging you off of him. “Though uh- we might wanna go somewhere else. Don’t want anyone walkin’ in on us.”

You could only smile in response, nodding in agreement. You may or may not have gotten caught up in everything, and the last thing you want is the whole base to know about your little excursions with Scout. It would probably kill both of your dignities. You hummed softly, before speaking. “Yeah, probably should. How about we go to my-”

“Nuh uh.” Scout cut you off, shaking his head as he pulled his shirt on, rolling up the already short sleeves. Honestly you just needed to buy him a tank top or something. “My room. I don’t wanna get all cozy just t’have you kickin’ me out in an hour.”

You smiled, stepping forward and pecking his cheek.

“Your room then.”

[stupid-4-you]

hear me out hear me out Lil’ Pootis BLU Scout but with like a nice partner, someone who’s like really nice and sweet and it’s a personality difference for the two but they get along so well!!

WOOO YOUR GIRL IS BACK!!!!!!! I’ve been so busy, but now I’m slowly getting back to it. Don’t guarantee anything ;3 this was such a cute ask!!

LIL POOTIS!BLU!SCOUT X A KIND READER

-Ok, so, Spy is definitely going to say to his son how he can’t make fun of his marriage to Engineer because Scout just found someone who is the total opposite of him as well. You two are pretty much like Spy and Engineer, Scout just hates to admit it.

-You are a rock to Scout. Being on the Blu team is rough in the first place since they’re on the short end of the stick and they get roughed up more than they win. Even if you are apart of this mess as a fellow mercenary, it is a shock how you managed to find a balance with your emotions. None of them have had a good day since they got assigned to payloads for the week, so you’re a good presence to have around. Always helping out, making jokes, distracting the others. 

-Which is why they were shocked when you started dating the Scout. It wasn’t an issue, you were on the same team. It was just a surprise to everyone else. Sure, you stood out in the cold with him when he was told to quit smoking indoors (though, him and Sniper still did on occasion), he gave you pointers on that rifle of yours and he was always asking where you were. But it didn’t seem that serious. No one really cared, everyone does their own thing. It’s still a shock though. 

-It’s best when you two are on the field together. He runs through the line of sight so you can sneak your way to the control point without even a cut. He doesn’t ever want you to get needlessly hurt on the field, even though you are a trained killer. So, he just goes before you get the chance. He was always taught you look out for those you care about (Thanks Spy). If you’re quicker than him, he will just run past you. Either way, you’re not getting shot. You will respawn either way, but he does not care. 

-Spy and Engineer are happy about your relationship. More Engineer than Spy. Del wants Scout to be closer with him, so he comes extra supportive. Even before you and Scout dated, Engie was always kind back to you. He is always waving at you with a smile after his entry shot the enemy Demoman. Spy will always remind Scout to treat your kindness back and to not take advantage of it. To always take you out to a nice place or buy you that thing you have been talking about as your birthday gets closer. Scout is not a very selfish guy, he has proven that to you before, though Spy worries. 

-Speaking of, any time you two go out, Scout will assume you want to do something fancy. If there is anything his dad has taught him, it’s that you do overly romantic things. If you hate going out to eat or you don’t have anything nice to wear, just tell him. He’s fine with just going to the corner store and getting some snacks. At least, he cleans up well and owns at least 2 two-pieces. He hates slicking his hair back though because you can see how far back his hairline has become.

-If you tell him straightforwardly how handsome you think he is, he gets super cocky. Like the “I know, thank you.” kind of way. Especially if you compliment his form. He has been working out for a couple years since joining his dad, he knows the progress he has made and how in shape he is. You do not even have to tell him, he knows you do. But once in a while, he will do something stupid like do a pull up on a random, low hanging pipe in the hallway to   impress you. If you’re the type of person to go crazy with compliments, he looks like he does not care. That is until he can’t help but smirk and say, “You’re alright.” before laughing and giving you a kiss on your hand to apologize. 

-By the way, he loves hand kisses. Not even in the romantic way. He will shake your hand limply and then kiss you with a big “Mwah!” and start laughing at how cringe that was.

-Since the days rotate on who is going out on the missions, you two have days where you don’t see each other. He will get home with his nose red and his clothes damp from the blowing, snowy winds outside and he just lays next to you on your shared bed, reading until you hug him at his side and kiss his shoulder. PDA isn’t a big thing to him. I mean, you’re with him, aren’t you? Everyone knows you two are in a established relationship that does not violate the Administrator’s rules, so why not show off a little? An arm will be wrapped around your back and the magazine on his lap. 

-Sometimes, he likes the silence when he comes back into the base. Of course, you know this too. As previously mentioned in my other post with the Lil Pootis Scouts, Blu Scout likes to go to the boiler room where the heaters and generators lie to get some privacy and warm up. It’s sort of hard to hide that you two cuddle in there, not that anyone goes there anyways, so eventually everyone found out. Though, if you are a girl, I would say Miss Pauling would allow you your own private room as a courtesy, so the others would only notice Scout’s absence and assume he disappeared to have a smoke. 

-If you’re a persistent person who will do anything for someone, you have absolutely gone outside with Scout while he was smoking. Spy has scolded him more than once, so now he has to make a habit of it. He hates when you come with him as he does not want you to get cold, but he knows you are stubborn. It’s not the company he minds, rather that you are withstanding the cold and the smell of cigarettes to be with him. He thinks you are the most thoughtful person ever for even bringing his lighter that he forgot or brought him some hot chocolate. Often, the other mercenaries catch you two chatting by the water tunnel while you rambled on to Scout about your day. 

Wafting against the cold, the flame kissed the tip of the cigarette and burned bright. The silver box shut at the pressure of your thumb and you put away his lighter. Grey puffs floated across the frozen air and danced with the deep shades of a painted blue and speckles of white. Your head against his falling shoulder. His hand at your right side, rubbing along your coat. He dragged his cigarette and blew away from you. Then he smiled. A soft smile that few could see. Sure, he was always smiling, but not like this. You are the person he wants to smile this way to. Because you are the person that melts him down, that makes him warm to the touch and wear down the usual tense. Overwhelmed, he did not like you when you first met as trainees. You would not last, he thought. You were too much. You did not shut up, you were too nice, you would be knocked before you could speak another word in no time. Sometimes, he looks back at his young self and wants smack him silly. Someone compassionate, someone who balanced out his mellow wanted to be his friend. Before he was good at what he did, before he got stronger and better at everything, you liked him.

Now, you are out in the cold with your shivering spine and twitching head. Eyes rolled and he’s off the boulder. It was freezing for you, you should warm up. But you had his lighter. And you kept your hands in your pockets. Unamused eyes looked at you as he prodded you to hand it over. You only backed up and smiled. He only got more demanding and he moved closer. You shook your head and giggled. A sigh comes from him. Then he pulls off his scarf and moves up to wrap it around. 

Now you felt a little bad. Smoke blew again. He smirked. A hand on your chin and your lips on his. Something sweet, then bitter. Ash was not a pleasant taste. And he knew it. 

[stupid-4-you]

General headcanons for Blu!Scout x reader

Hello everyone!! I hope you had a happy new year!! I want to start a new series where I make headcanons for characters I haven’t written for yet to show you my interpretations of them. This is the first, please enjoy!

-I like to believe that unlike the Red Scout, he is much more experienced or gifted at killing. In the “Meet the Spy” video, which I know is Spy disguised as Scout, but Heavy bought it and he’s canonically a smart cookie, he says he has killed plenty of spies as if it was just like driving a car. And he is very cocky about it. When he has to clear a room, he doesn’t speak. His mind is focused for once; gauging the situation. You get whiplash from how quickly he can go from hyper focused to the annoying prick you know and love.

-He has saved your hide plenty of times. You’ve saved his too. Having had a couple of enemy knives to your throat only for their heads to get blown off by Scout with his Babyface. 

“You alright, gorgeous?”  He would ask.

“Yeah,” he extended his hand down to you, “Thanks.” 

“On your feet, babe! Let’s go!” 

-He looks physically different from Scout in subtle ways. Their uniform is the same and they both wear dog tags, but Blu Scout has dirty blonde hair and green eyes. Blu started the hand wraps thing, which the Red Scout would copy because he thought it looked cool, because he would get his knuckles scraped as he has a habit of breaking his fall with his fist when sped across the field. The same long face as the Red Scout, just with bushier eyebrows. He also has freckles (I totally stole that from Lil Pootis). He also has a resting passive aggressive face, he looks unamused.

-He is diagnosed with OCD and experiences intrusive thoughts. It’s funny because he is good at staying calm in situations, but will think about them later on. But he likes to keep his worries to himself. He worries that something really bad will happen to you or himself one day; such as the respawn machine stops working and he won’t see you or Ma ever again. You have had to help him through a panic attack a few times, but he hates when you find him like that. He tries to get you out the door and lock himself in. He smokes to help his anxiety, but obviously, it makes his heart beat faster, making him worse and only helping temporarily. He will try and hide it from you, but you can taste it on his breath when you kiss. 

-He does not leave you without a kiss on the cheek or the lips. He’s more than fine with PDA too and he always holds your hand or if someone else needs you to get out of the way and he notices, he gently moves you by the waist. He gets cocky about it to the other mercenaries. 

“Yeah, yeah, I know you guys are jealous. I got the finest thing I’ve ever laid my eyes on and they chose me! Suck it!” 

Literally no one is paying attention.

-He takes note of everyone he has to work with. Though he can read and spell better than Red, he’s not great at writing and can’t get all of his ideas organized, so he draws what he notices about the others. For example, Spy keeps a picture of a young boy in his disguise kit and so, Scout drew Spy looking at the picture in the open kit in his left hand while the right dragged a smoke. They are amazing sketches that he never finishes. He only colors in hair or darker materials. He has so many sketches of you that he keeps in his desk drawer. If you compiled the amount of drawings he had of you, it would qualify as an anatomical study. 

-Wakes up super early. Can never sleep either due to his anxiety or his add. He will wake you up early whenever he does. Not usually when he is having an anxiety spell, he doesn’t like dragging you into that despite accidentally waking you up multiple times. He has a smoke, then makes you coffee, however you like, he will remember, wakes you up and makes sure you don’t fall back asleep. He will just keep pestering you until you stubbornly stay awake. He’s annoying and he knows it. If you don’t feel like talking, which is understandable since you’re up at 3:30, he will chat about the team or his life back in Boston.

-He has a thing for sweet treats. He always likes to take you out to the bakery just outside of the base and get you two a milkshake and some cake slices. The first time you two went, it was about 2 months into your relationship. You have not gone out of the Builder’s League since you got there, so Scout took you! It was a small little dinner that was rimmed with cherry red and a neon blue “OPEN” sign. He held the door for you.

“M’baby.” 

You seated yourself and grabbed the menus from the end of the table. You looked at all of the options, mostly the pastries. 

“I’m gonna get a malt. Ya want one, dollface?” 

“Sure, thank you!” You smiled.

The counter was a light pink, lined with a checkered, black-and-white belt wrapped around it. When he came back, he had a slice of pie, your pastry and one milkshake.

“I thought you got me one too?” You asked, puzzled.

“Yeah,” he handed you a bendable straw, “here ya go!” 

He put his red striped straw in the whipped cream and took a sip. 

“We’re sharing?” You laughed, flabbergasted.

“Isn’t that what couples do?” 

You chuckled. “You dork.”

[stupid-4-you]

This request is completely platonic!!!!! But I love Engineer being a father figure. So can I fluff fic where reader is a younger merc. Let’s say around Scout’s age. And they get along well with Engineer to where one day they say “Thanks, dad!” to him and then immediately panic with embarrassment. Trying to cover up their mistake. But Engie thinks it’s the sweetest thing. Bonus points if other Mercs are around to make fun of the reader.

Mmmmmh dad Engie ❤️ my daddy issues melt away the second I see him.

It's quite alright, kiddo.

platonic!Engineer x reader

Fluff

Drabble

Engie being a good dad

"Wrench please."

You searched through Engineer's toolbox, grabbing the wrench and handing it to him. He nodded in appreciation, grabbing it from you and muttering out a small thanks. This was just kinda how you worked. You hung around in Engie's workshop enough to be an unofficial assistant, and he enjoyed your company. It was pretty peaceful, assisting him with everything while he worked, the two of you listening to the radio on a low volume. The atmosphere was peaceful and cozy, and the lighting was a little dimmer than would probably be considered safe for a working environment. He stood up, crossing his arms and nodding approvingly of the work done on his turret.

"That should do it. Thanks, kiddo." He grinned, reaching over and mussing up your hair good naturedly. You scoffed, smacking his hand away and grumbling about him getting grease in your hair.

"Engie! Seriously?" You couldn't help but smile despite yourself.

...

You sat at the table, drumming your fingers patiently. Heavy had made sandwiches for everyone, a much needed homemade dinner after nothing but the readily made rations you usually ate. It wasn't like there was nothing to cook with, more like nobody really wanted to cook. You and the rest of the mercs waited expectantly as Heavy brought you all your dinner with a big grin. Before you dug in, you looked over the table. A bag of community chips sat on the other side, just out of your reach. "Could you pass the chips?" You asked Engineer, him looking up from the toothpick and olive structure he was creating and nodded.

"Sure. Here y'go, kid." He spoke, grabbing the chip bag and handing it to you.

"Thanks Dad- DUDE."

The table went quiet. Your face flushed.

"I- I said dude."

The table erupted in laughter, save for Engineer and Pyro. You sunk into your seat, hearing everyone make comments on your little slip-up.

"Dad? What are ya, four?"

"Vell zhis is razher interesting!"

"I thought you were a red-blooded American! You're just a little pansy!"

"I did not think little assistant would want to be Engineer's child. Is a little funny, да?"

You sunk further in your seat, covering your face and wishing you were dead. Before any more merciless teasing could continue, you heard Engineer speak in that reassuring and calm voice of his.

"Now now, boys. That just ain't fair, all'a you makin' fun'uh them like that. Makes sense they'd call me like a father figure, with how I treat'm n' all, so y'all shouldn't say all that." He spoke firmly, looking at everyone with a small threat in his eyes. You breathed out a small sigh of relief, reassured by the fact that at least Engineer wasn't making fun of you. Honestly he was the one you cared the most about what he thought about you, so it was a little relieving to hear him defend you. The rest of them piped down.

Dinner went on a little awkwardly, but you finished your meal, thanking Heavy for the sandwiches and heading to your room. You collapsed into your bed, shoving your face into your pillows and letting out a muffled scream of frustration. You just wanted to melt into your blankets for eternity. You felt so dumb.

You looked up, hearing a knock on your doorframe. Eugh. You forgot to close your door. Engie greeted you with a gentle smile. "Am I interruptin' anything?" He asked, stepping into your room. You buried your face back into your bedding, mumbling out a muffled apology. Thankfully though, Engie seemed to get what you were saying. "Oh, don't apologize. Ya couldn't help it." He started, sitting on the edge of your bed and placing a hand on your back. "N'anyway, I don't mind in the slightest. You kin' go ahead n'keep callin' me that if you want."

That was a pretty reassuring. It felt nice to know he was okay with it. You didn't know exactly why you saw him as a father figure, but he was an absolute sweetheart about it. You'd probably get over the embarrassment. "Thanks, Engie. I think I'll hold off for now, just for the sake of my dignity."

He laughed loudly, running his hand down his face as he calmed down.

"That's quite alright, kiddo. That's quite alright."

[stupid-4-you]

hi! could you do either the red or blu lil' pootis scouts with a transmasc reader?

Hello!!! I am so sorry this request took a while! I had some personal things, then I wanted to look into what TransMasc really was and educate myself! I am a non-trans woman, so it was a little difficult, BUT! This is a safe space and all are welcome! I hope you like this!!!!!!

LIL POOTIS!SCOUTS X A TRANSMASCULINE READER

RED!

-I have the headcanon for certain Scouts that they are transgender FTM. In this case, Red Scout is, but Blu Scout isn’t (I don’t know, it just feels like that). However, Red Scout doesn’t tell many people since he knows he passes and doesn’t want to ruin that. 

-That being said, he will not care at all. Ok, you wanna start dressing less effeminate? Let’s go to the store! In fact, you can have some my old clothes! Not much would change. Unless you had to tell the other mercs, which would seem like a problem, but they could honestly care less. They all do their own things. He wants you to be apart of Pootis’s life, so he teaches Pootis your identity. Pootis just looks at Scout a little confused, then looks at you behind him on his bed and squeaks a smile. 

-Speaking of, if you feel like you don’t pass as a masculine person (Not specifically as a male), he would help with that. Hes been through all of it before; the bad days, the fear. He’s totally the type of guy who would do something stupidly cheesy like buy two binders, one for you and one for him, so you don’t get uncomfortable wearing them. Medic already gave him a double mastectomy, he doesn’t need one anymore. But he really does care about you :(

-By the way, if you wanna get the surgery, just ask Medic! 

-You’re just his partner, or his boyfriend if that’s what you wanna be called. He will, however, call you handsome and his guy (To Scout, guy or dude is gender neutral). Scout knows you might not be a guy, rather non binary with more masculine attributes. He would understand a lot more than Blu Scout would. 

-Your biggest fan! He loves complimenting you whenever you change your hair or put on your outfit (excluding your uniform). Then he’ll hold your chin and kiss your forehead. He loves you, and he does not care who you are. 

BLU!

-Ok, so, I want to be clear, he would not understand very well. But, he is not against it. He has two dads, why would he be? You will have to educate him. After that? It’s just fine! You’ll be the first non female person he has been with. It takes some getting used to. Blootis too, though, he likes having you around, he’s more independent than Pootis. But he knows what he likes, and that’s you. No matter how you are. 

-He is much less attentive than Red Scout, but that means you have to communicate more. If that’s not something you do, he will eventually catch on, however it would take a long time. He would see how you weren’t in a good mood whenever he spoke to you and then asks you what’s wrong.

-You are now Blootis’s second dad. That’s it, that’s the headcanon. 

-To get his mind off things, he likes to work out. Even though, he does it for an unhealthy amount of time. However, he will offer to take you whenever you feel icky about yourself some days. He is somewhat inclined to stereotypes hobbies as gendered. However, he really offers because he wants you to feel better about yourself. And he thinks maybe building your body would help. 

-He will unintentionally get really close to you when spotting you. Or he comes up behind you and hold up the weight you’re really struggling with and lift it without much effort to correct your form, then you get the gist of how you’re supposed to do it properly. 

-If you’re having a rough night around the other guys and feel like you can’t hang out with Soldier or Demoman without feeling like you aren’t “one of the guys”, go and find Scout outside smoking in the snow. He asks what’s wrong and you tell him. He takes you to the boiler room (Romantic, I know, but there is no where else that’s private) and lays you down near the heater. His way of comforting is very soothing. Running circles on your chest, whether you choose to get a double mastectomy or not and only if you’re comfortable with it; holding you to himself, pressing kisses to your temple.

[stupid-4-you]

VALENTINE’S DAY WITH THE SCOUTS

heyyy it’s been a while! Enjoy this little treat while I keep procrastinating on my real quests :3

Red!Scout:

Scout loves just about anything, however he loves when you let him pick the date (He likes to outdo himself). He chose to drive you down to the Teufort community fair and spend the afternoon there. Being a shortstop for his brothers had its perks because he was asked to stop playing after winning you 3 stuffed animals. Afterwards, he would order takeout and rent a movie for the night while cuddling you on the couch. 

Blu!Scout:

Scout’s mom would bake for him all the time before she passed away and now he wants to do the same for you. You wake up to a delicious breakfast, then he takes you out to the riverside within the town to have a picnic. An assortment of cheese, a small cake he made the day prior and drinks with spreaders and glasses. You gift him a little basket full of his favorite candies and that science fiction novel he wanted since it came out.

Lil Pootis!Scout:

Your whole day is planned. First, Scout peppers you in kisses to wake you up before giving you a big smooch on the lips.  Then Pootis is spoiled the moment he wakes up with juice and some candy. You two have breakfast with the team before taking Medimedes and Pootis to the park. While the two birds play, Scout has his head tucked underneath your arm. Then he playfully hits your stomach with a wrapped box. Remember that thing you wanted weeks ago? 

Lil Pootis!Blu!Scout:

He is not the best at gifting, but Spy told him he should stick to flowers. So, Scout got you an expensive bouquet. He’s a douche, but I do not see him being a cheapo. He’s down for whatever, but honestly, he would rather have a bonfire at the base and just talk with you. He can make a mean s’more. He likes collecting butterfly knives and custom engraved lighters, so if you got him a switch with the Scout’s emblem on the inner blade, he would squeeze you into a hug (which he never does).

Ass Pancakes:

He does not know what to do for this holiday, never really celebrated, so he unintentionally drags you around for the entire day. Messing with people is his favorite pastime and you are his favorite person, so what more could he ask for? Especially when his buddies come along with him, then he gets even more ecstatic. If you want something more relaxed, the most you get is him hugging you while sitting on the roof and taking pictures with him all day. Seriously, get him a Polaroid, he would always use it.

7th comic!Scout: 

Jeremy did not want to leave his kids alone on Valentine’s Day, it’s a special day to them. He always buys them chocolates or flowers and they do something fun for the night. This would be your second Valentine’s Day with them, so you decided to get them gifts as well! They played with their new toys while you and Jeremy made dinner together. He definitely owns a cute apron. After playing some games with the kids and putting them to bed, you two finally got some privacy.

New Again!Scout:

Honestly? He gets you some slushies and takes you to a basement show. Much like Lil Pootis!Blu!Scout, he regulars at this one venue by his apartment (his team does not have a base, it’s more of a meetup situation). Then afterwards, he goes to the after show at the 24-hour diner and gets you breakfast burritos. If you are not a fan of concerts, that’s cool! He would be down for some recreational fun if you were (he got some weed from his dealer earlier that week). 

Boston Boarder!Scout:

Despite how people look at him, he is an absolute sweetheart. BB!Scout is my version of Scout in his early 20s before he became a mercenary and lived his life in Boston as a skater. He meets you at the park and gives you a bag full of candy and some extra things you wanted for a while. Then you two spend the whole day and night walking around the city and talking and shopping around until you grab some drinks and head back to his mom’s house to watch TV. 

Magnificent Nine!Scout:

All he wants is a day where you two can relax together without worrying about the other teams. Unfortunately, you two do not get that. The fighting is constant and always will be. That does not stop him from getting you something small, like a drink at the bar or asking Engineer to make a custom add on for one of your weapons. When you two get even a second alone, he is holding you in his arms.

[stupid-4-you]

SUNFLOWER "ANON" HERE AGAIN RGHHAHHHHHHH (i prefer sending anon asks)

timeskip scout with a dilf hunter reader /j /sfw🙏

reader meets scout (and the rest of the team) again after 7 years and now he has kids and a shitty mullet, immediately goes *neuron activation* after seeing how great he is with his children

reader fr being not the step parent but the parent that stepped up 🙏

HEY ANON!!!!!!! (I totally get you) 

I am so happy to get this request, because I think about this SO often! I was already into Scout before, but him becoming a Dilf was NOT on my 2024 bingo card 🗣‼️‼️ I have made another fic about Dad!Scout before, so here’s the link if you wanna check it out!! https://www.tumblr.com/kingqueensoobscene/770802320729669632/you-got-it-boss-i-wrote-this-as-a-romantic-scout

COMIC!SCOUT X DILF LOVER!READER (SFW)

-In the beginning, you met Scout working as a mercenary and while you joined the last out of the 10, you quickly became good friends. Being the 2nd youngest out of the 10, you and Scout had more in common. Comic books, TV shows, action figures, collecting cards. As a skilled defense, you worked well with Scout. Scout created a distraction long enough for you to knock the enemy Soldier from behind. Or for him to grab the intelligence while watching his flank. Then there was always celebrating wins together with spiked Bonk! on a late afternoon.

-Over time, you wanted the one you could not have. The unrequited crush he had on Miss Pauling, who you felt would not like him back considering she devoted 10 years of her life to a woman, made you feel sad. And Spy noticed those nights you spent sitting alone in the common area, morphing into color to tell you that this was all pointless. You only shrugged. You couldn’t help who you were attracted to. The fabric of his gloves brushed along woven cloth as he moved from his hand from his head to his eyes and rubbed them. Reassuringly, Spy told you you were an open book and Jeremy can’t read. As stupid as it sounded, he was right.

-Most of the team, some uncaring for it, knew you liked Scout. And it wasn’t that you acted like an idiot in front of him or that you flirted or even act jealous when Miss Pauling was around, you did none of that. It was how you looked at him. You looked past all of his stupidity and his overconfidence and you saw how he actually was. A sore loser who wanted to be liked. He told you all of the things that bothered him; how he couldn’t kill that one dumb Blu Sniper that keeps getting a hit on him no matter what you two strategized and how he viewed the other mercenaries as the family he missed back in Boston. He was oddly sacred when it came to his family. He liked not being alone and being around the loud and despite being the least strong, being capable of helping out his team and getting the chance to prove himself. And how everyone knew that you saw him as something other than a Masshole. And they really, really doubted you.  

-Down the line, with the help of Soldier, Miss Pauling found the scarce Australium thought to be gone from the Earth. After getting out of Australia, you found yourself in the maw of the Administrator and the many other teams of mercenaries. After the purpose of the entire manhunt for this element was found to be futile, you moved on. That was it. Moving on in life after the administrator was dusted was difficult. A harsh reality that the 9 other guys you started to see as people other than your coworkers, you would most likely not see again. It’s wasn’t so bad though; you got a good job, still did the things you loved, had a good social life too. You just missed one thing very much, your friend. 

-It was a shock when you found Soldier in your apartment when you came home from work. He gave you a big ol hug that knocked the wind out of you while two weights held your legs down to Earth. Two kids? Zhanna and Doe had children?! Soldier quickly brushed you off, saying that Merasmus wanted to hurry and explained that you were the only one the rest of the team couldn’t find. You were the only smart one who threatened to sue unless you were given a compensation package and a new identity. You were taken, not by choice, though you didn’t complain, to the city of Boston.

-When you arrived with the entirety of Heavy and now Soldier’s family, it was on the steps of the house of a boy you used to know well. Honestly, you were nervous, but excited. You had already caught up with Heavy and Medic the whole car ride there. Drifting to the back of the line as Heavy entered with the turkey the unattended Miss Pauling bought the team and Soldier’s kids practically dashed under the legs of everyone. Then you saw him. His hair all shagged out and his face with no traces of his 20’s anywhere. His eyes widened and a smile grew. 

“You goober! I thought I wasn’t gonna see ya tonight!” He said as he pulled you into a squeezed hug. 

It lasted for a couple more seconds before Scout looked down. A little boy tugging at his legs. 

“Daddy, can me and Patton and Georgia go play outside?” A small boy with yellow goggles on his face asked.

“Hmm, I dunno. Dinners about to start. Why don’t you wait until after dinner, alright?” Jeremy ruffled the boy’s hair. 

“Alright dad!” He ran off back into the kitchen.

You were honestly kind of surprised. You knew he wanted a family, but you never expected how good of a father he would be. His kid didn’t seem to throw a fit about waiting, instead just listening to him. Your crush just got revamped entirely. Your mind became moments of the days you spent on the rooftop talking about his Ma and his family. It seemed weird to be passionate about, but the impression was given that he wanted to have kids of his own to take care of and be a better father than the man who was absent. Giggling was loud in the living room where you saw 5 more kids, two of which were Soldier’s. 

“You have 4 children?!” 

Jeremy only laughed. “You too, huh? Yeah, everyone’s so shocked.”

“I mean, it has been 7 years.” 

“Yeah, but that just means we got lots of catchin’ up, huh?” He punched your arm.

“For starters, where’s your lucky wife? You nudged his side, smirking.

“Got none. All deadbeats, the last three. Doesn’t matter, they’re my kids and I’m gonna raise ‘em right.” 

Despite the circumstances that you wish were much better for the children’s well-being, this just got so much better for you. 

“But I love my lil boogers.” 

He ran up behind the running girl who had a purple skirt and a grey sweater on. He picked her up under her arms and brought her to his face. 

“Isn’t that right, my lil booger?” He kissed the girl’s cheek and she giggled more.

He set her down gently and made an explosion noise. Another girl, a redhead, came up and asked if she could be exploded and you chuckled. But he did it, he lifted her up, gave her a peck on the forehead and set her down making a crashing noise. He was really good with kids. Maybe you would take him up on that offer to catch up.

-Eventually and habitually, you often visited his home on the weekends. He wasn’t really a fan of leaving the kids home alone, so he liked having you over for dinner. He has a recipe book his mom got him that he uses almost every time he makes dinner. She copied all of the recipes from their family, saving the originals and made them into a book for him when his family visited for Christmas (After the holiday party with the team). It is some of the most delicious food ever. 

-During the spring, he brought out the toy cars for his kids to run around with in the backyard. While he was inside making lemonade, the brown haired girl, Tanya, ran up to you. 

“(Name)! (Name)! We need someone to be the helpless victim to Tommy’s castle.” She shook your arm, her balaclava that was way too large for her face flopped around as she did so. 

“I guess I’ll have to be saved by the princess assassin once again.” You woed dramatically as she dragged you along to Tommy’s little sandbox. 

Tommy had a plastic knights mask on, one he got for Christmas as he has told you ecstatically many times. Jeremy was a good listener when it came to his kids, since he was the youngest of 8 and was mostly given hand-me-downs and mostly unintentionally ignored at times by his Ma. So, since he has half the kids and more free time due to being technically in early retirement, he makes sure all of his kids get what they want. They are a little spoiled.

You were behind the green closed sandbox, where Tommy has “captured” you. You pretended to be tied up, with the imaginary chains behind your back. Tanya, Andy, the curly haired boy and Sierra, the redheaded girl, were huddled up and talking in hushed voices. Andy had on a red cape and his yellow goggles. You could never get him to take those things off.

“So we’re gonna tackle him?” Sierra asked.

“Duh!” Tanya exclaimed.

“Ok!”

They took after their dad so much. Going into things with one thing in mind. Tanya and Andy ran after Tommy and grabbed his legs, tumbling to the ground. Sierra grabbed your arm and led you to the playground set Jeremy had installed over the summer. She urged you to hurry up, so you climbed up the slide while she went up the rocks. 

“We won!” She threw her hands to the sky. 

You, on the other hand, “Are you ok, Tommy?” 

Andy was looking down at his brother, biting his lip. Tommy lifted up the plastic top of the knights mask and you could a smile on his rosy face.

“I’m ok!” 

You took the slide down and went up to him. 

“You sure?” 

“Mhm!”

“Good,” you helped him to his feet, “because I need a knight to help me win against an assassin.”

Tanya whined and looked betrayed. 

“What? No fair!” 

“You were fooled, it was a trap!” You grabbed a foam sword. 

Tommy giggled manically as you both ran after them. You didn’t hit the 3, you couldn’t, but you pretended to slash them with a “shh!” noise. Then you heard a loud laugh to your left. 

“Heh, oh man! That’s something. C’mon kids, come get your drinks.” You saw Jeremy had come back. 

The kids dropped what they were doing and ran to the cookies and lemonade. You walked up to Jeremy a little rosy. 

“I hate to say it, but I betrayed your daughter.” You chuckled.

“Yeah, I saw that.” He smirked.

After putting the kids to bed, Jeremy walked you out the door.

“Hey, uh, thanks for taking care of my kids when I would step away.” He leaned his elbow against the doorframe. 

“That’s nothing! You’re great with your kids, I’ve never seen kids be such good listeners.” 

“Heh, well, their dad is an amazing guy.” He chuckled.

Then there was silence. You hesitated. Jeremy looked at you with a squint and a smile. 

“You okay?” 

“I have to tell you something to tell you. And it’s going to be hard because it might ruin things between us.”

“Oh yeah?” He smiled, unserious. 

“I- ok, so I have known you for a long time and you are one of the people I care about the most. I know it’s been a long time, but those feelings have come back again. I know you have your kids and I know that’s the life you want, which is totally fine! But now that we’re older, I wanted to tell you and get it off my chest.” 

He leaned closer, waiting with an eager smile. 

“I have always liked you.”

“That it?” 

“That’s all.” 

You could not look into his eyes. You did not want to see him angry or in disbelief if this would be the last time you ever talk to him again. You feel awful, but you need to tell him otherwise you would regret it again. 

“Is it because I’m a dad now? Because i always knew I was smokin’ hot, but I never knew that’s what it would take for you to tell me.”

Then you started to laugh. And he laughed. And you looked at him now. He was just looking at you. 

“Do you like me?” You asked.

“Well, no. But now I’m thinking why the hell I didn’t.” 

And there was another moment of silence again. For once in his life, he actually thought about his words. It would take some serious rekindling before he would consider dating you. His kids come first and that is something he makes clear from the beginning. To be honest, he has thought about you for some time. He’s trusted you for years, and now he knows he still can.

“I dunno, maybe this could work. But, hey, uh, just gimme some time. I’ll have to find a babysitter.”

[stupid-4-you]

Hello hello! I have a request for Red Scout, or any Scout you would prefer honestly. Romantic or platonic, GNC reader.

Reader is a tenth class who is very sweet, affectionate, quiet, incredibly patient, and friendly. They are good on the battlefield, of course, but their main contribution to the team (unintentionally) is their ability to brighten up any room they step in.

Over the last month or so, there has been some light changes in their behaviour. They eat a LOT more then they used to, they are getting just a bit more irritable and easily overstimulated, and they have been significantly more brutal on the battlefield.

Once day, after a long battle with many respawns, Reader has locked themself in their room before anyone could get a good look at them. By the time someone goes to check on them (likely Scout), Reader has tackled them to the ground with tears in their eyes, trying to fight every instinct in their body from tearing their teammate into tastey, tastey chunks of meat. They have claws, fangs, and a strange amount of strength now, it would be so easy.

Tldr: Reader is a victim of an ongoing Respawn error, which has made them into a bit of a super hungry creature. (or alternatively, Reader has been turned into a regretful Freak)

SCIENCE FICTION DOUBLE FEATURE BABY!!!! I thought about which Scout would be the best at comforting a mutant reader and thought Blu would be the best at handling the situation, so I hope that’s ok!!!

Gif By @strawberrysnipes

BLU!SCOUT X MONSTER!READER

-He noticed that you developed a bigger appetite and started to take more than you needed. Not like taking one or two servings of dinner, rather 5 or 6. He was worried that you were stress eating and started to urge you to seek help and offered to take you to a clinic. However, your sunken eyes and the veins becoming more prominent on your hands showed this was much more than that. 

-Scout had miscellaneous periods of panic attacks that would engorge his mind. He would lock his door and cry and cry and hyperventilate until he either fell asleep or calmed down enough to get some water. When you developed the same habit as he did, locking yourself away after missions, he would be more concerned than you could ever possibly be. He would knock and beg you to come out and talk to Medic about your health. The only response was a mumbled request for him to leave you be. So, Blu gave you a day, then two. 

-Muffled shrieks spewed from the private quarters of yours. Attention was gathered by your neighbors, Demoman and Spy. They ran out to the docks to get Heavy and whoever was with him to help. Ramming into your locked door, Soldier followed behind Heavy. Unwashed clothes and scraps of food scattered and lacerated. Creaking floorboards turned into thumping runs and Heavy fell. Skin  satiated. You could not help it. Chunks and thick red coated your teeth and caked your skin. Heavy let out a yell. Scout ran fast, almost skidding on his shoes when he reached the crowded doorway. Soldier’s grip around your wrists held you back from the others. The medigun rumbled and healed Heavy. 

“Sniper! Kill this maggot!” Soldier demanded.

Click went the rifle and it stared at your forehead.

And you cried. 

Scout rushed in and gripped the marksman’s shoulder and shouted in his ear,

“Quit it! Don’t just kill em yet!” 

You whined. Calloused hands planted your face to the floor.

“You cockamamie!” Soldier sneered

“Ya really wanna kill an asset?!” Scout’s eyebrows furrowed when he shouted.

“They tried to kill our own, boy! Besides, they’ll respawn,” Soldier looked down at your squished head and leaned closer, “maybe it’ll knock some sense back into you, deplorable!”

It hit him hard. Your last mission, you went in with Scout, then died while he snatched the intelligence. You did not come back right. 

“Engineer, who was the last outta the respawn before payloads?” Scout directed his body to the man in the door way.

And Del knew it too. 

He took his hard hat off. “I believe it was sunshine here.” 

Further inquiry with the courtesy of Medic, who Scout stayed with you over to make sure he did not do any inhumane experiments or add anything to worsen your condition. He found that your limbic and metabolic systems were similar to that of a carnivore’s. The enzymes in your body only broke down meat, which would be impossible for the human body as it requires other nutrients. However, your body expanded, your limbs grew and you gained some muscle. You were much bigger. Your body adapted to a carnivorous diet.

Medic’s theory was that a chunk of blown off flesh landed in the respawn machine the same time you were being genetically “sewn back together”. That chunk of meat was encoded when you were in the beginning stages where your stomach, as it was being rebuilt, processed the meat and took it in as the “model”, or the main principle of your diet. There on out, your diet is nearly unsatisfiable. To be entirely full, you would have to eat around 250 pounds of meat. Mind you, the average adult needs about a half a pound to 2 pounds of meat a day. Meat has become the primary nutrient provider. However, this only effected your appetite, not your personality.

As much as Medic wanted to see what you could do in this state, Scout argued with him to help find a solution to regulate your appetite.

-Eventually, there would be some normalcy. Diet pills and a small little attachment to your back, kind of like a diabetic or nicotine patch, delivered meal replacing supplements to your body. Though, the patch did not last for very long.  So the pack would wear off. The diet pills helped exponentially, however, when you are out on the field, meals were free reign. So, in Bane fashion, you could skimp a pill and let the pack run out, then shock to the Red team when you ripped off their Spy’s legs off with your teeth alone. Then when you are satiated, you smile at Engineer when reverted back to your usual self. He only laughs.

-Your relationship with Scout gets a little rocky. There is not a day he would dare think of leaving and taking all of what you have given him and devoted to him away to leave you with nothing. You are the only person who can go along with any of the dumb things he does and be just as stupid as he is and that is one of the reasons why he loves you. Even if Scout can’t look at you the same for a while. Your skin bony and your maw unhinged, holding a field of piranha-like teeth. As I have said before, he can be super focused on a situation and handle it well, but once the moment is over, he will have a shaky, teary eyed panic attack. Why did this have to happen to you? You did not deserve a life like this. Scout worried about these things all the time and now it came true. He would sleep in Heavy’s room at night out of fear that you would hurt him. It’s awful, but can you blame him? Criesthat would be kept safe within the walls of his room would lead to some convincing on big brother Misha’s end; telling Scout that Heavy has visited you on multiple occasions and you were harmless.   

-Scout started checking in on you all the time. Asking you how you were and telling you about how his missions went. And you would respond like your former self would. You acted like yourself, you were yourself. You just did not look like you anymore. Now that you were not as hungry due to having an oversupply of food and those diet pills, Scout felt more comfortable being around you. You saw his smile again, the same smile that you saw on cold nights where you held him for warmth and talked to each other about miscellany. He trusted you again. Once you were out of Medic’s operating room and had a proper treatment plan, Scout immediately wanted to have a date night.

Since you obviously couldn’t go, he took a ride down to that diner you two used to frequent and bring you back a milkshake and a treat. Your newly installed bed was larger than a queen so you could actually sleep on it (Thank you Engie). It was weird to explain to Miss Pauling that you were now an inhuman entity that needed a larger living space, but she gave you the larger storage room. It still felt weird to sit next to Scout after all this time, even if this isn’t the first time you’ve seen each other since the incident. No matter how tall you were before, Scout was now underminded next to you. You were at least 5 inches taller than him, around 6’5. He chewed on his pie slice that he ate barehanded, getting crumbs all over his mouth and lap. You chuckled at him, biting into your own pastry before your nerves turned sensitive against the non-meaty food and you gagged. He looked down at the milkshake with his eyebrows up in concern. He winced.

“I’m so sorry, hon! I didn’t even think ‘bout that.”

You looked at him. Your Heart pounded against your chest and you shuddered. Your fingers reached your lips, the dry dumps like that of popcorn ceiling, then your palm engulfed them. Eyes shut. You cannot look at your own hands anymore. 

“Oh, baby, don’t cry. Please.” Scout rubbed your arm.

“Why are you still with me?” You mumbled under hands that were not your own, from a mouth with teeth that were not your own while crying from eyes that witnessed your stolen body.

“Ay, don’t start talkin’ like that! You’re still my baby.”

“Jeremy, look at me. I’m half your size! I’m not pretty anymore,” You sniffed, swallowing the dryness from your throat, “I- we can’t even have an actual date anymore.”

Shriveled up and your legs weighed you down under your heart. Hands covering a face you regret. You shouldn’t have been so reckless, otherwise you wouldn’t have been killed and regenerated as a creature of unimaginable horrors. You didn’t want this. Why did this happen to you?

“Hey, hey, I’m not worried ‘bout any of that. First off, I only liked dates because you were hangin’ out with me. We coulda been watchin’ paint dry and it woulda been so fun cause you were there with me. Second, you are still the finest thing I ever seen in my life.” Scout held the hands that were against your face. 

Then you laughed. Your hands loosened and held his.

“You’re a dork. And a weirdo. What is so sexy about this?” You opened your mouth to bare your spiraling rings of pointed teeth.

“Uh, d- uh, well, we could talk ‘bout that later.”

“Gross.” You couldn’t hold back a stupid smile and laugh.

“Anyways, you’re still my baby. And I love you.”

“I love you too.”