swervgottiswerv

[swervgottiswerv]

Movin, but it all feels very stagnant. Patience.

[swervgottiswerv]

I will sell my first $1000 artwork either in this January or this upcoming February.

[swervgottiswerv]

My body crashed on me today. It’s been overdue, but I’m good now. At least I think.

Hope this Peerspace idea I have works. Could end up putting a lot of people onto my art. Far fetched ideas are the best.

I’m starting to see more evident than before the sacrifices associated for my dream. You can’t have everything in life; this is supported by the fact you can’t be in 2 places at the same time.

It’s a vast world.

Of who I keep an eye on: One in particular is not reciprocated. One in particular is not the same preference. Actually maybe 2 in that situation. One in particular I think is currently taken. Some in particular I just don’t know; there seems to always be a nigga in the cut.

I want to take who I can with me on this journey.

[swervgottiswerv]

I can’t say certain things to people that I meet because of or thru my brand because es no bien mira. I’m not trying to be grimey, or sneaky, or make someone feel uncomfortable. I wouldn’t even know 99% of these people any way. A nigga just get curious. Then if I ask, it’s like, in my head I’m thinking their thinking “Oh, that must have been the intention from the jump.” It wasn’t, I was just curious.

That shit could hurt my art, the brand, my name. Then I don’t say shit, don’t act on it, but end up thinking about that shit all the time, and then that’s another burden.

Fuck.

If I ask, I fuck myself. If I don’t, I still fuck myself. Maybe I’m not supposed to because it would ultimately be a distraction? Am I not supposed to have any distractions right now.

Gonna be 30 next year.

[swervgottiswerv]

December 8th of 2021, please be a good day.

[swervgottiswerv]

1st show was a success. It was small, but everybody seemed legit happy. We can do better, but this for sure is a good foundation. No idea how much this shit means to me. I want everyone to get what they want out of life and to get better.

[swervgottiswerv]

Fortune Favors the Brave. Niggas.

Its funny, seeing people on the bird app say, “We still gon call it Staple Center.” That’s okay, but you can’t deny knowing of a Crypto.Com existence. And a whole lotta other people just got put on too. Maybe they’ll wander down that rabbit hole to see what it really is. Who knows. The name, in this case I’d say, is surface level shit. It’s what that name change signifies for the potential future.

[swervgottiswerv]

Going to ComplexCon this year. Don’t give a fuck about buying shit, I just hope I can see some cool shit and hopefully meet at least 1 cool person. Pass these stickers out. Hopefully shit ends up in the right hands. Hands of those that fuck with my art, shit I’m doing.

Let this crypto play come to fruition too. Gotta wait 2 days for cash to clear, I just hope I buy in time before this next run.

Kinda drained, but we gotta keep movin.

[swervgottiswerv]

If I make it to Bahia and São Paulo at the end of all this, like I plan to, It’ll be an achievement on levels, but apart of me is still taking an L. I’ll be happy, but that feeling will be spiked with a bit of spitefulness. I’m sorry God, my bad, but you already know how I feel about how this probably gonna play out.

11 months to go.

[swervgottiswerv]

Will I be planning a trip to Brazil around this time next year? With the way things have been going, the likelihood is high as shit. For art. For people. For food. If I make it there, I know when I come back I won’t be the same.

[swervgottiswerv]

Lease is signed. I got the key. We starting an art gallery. Here’s to potentially eating fried rice everyday for the next year. Shits worth it.

[swervgottiswerv]

Scheming on a decision that could potentially have me eating fried rice for 6-12 months. But the upside is whatever I can make out of it.

[swervgottiswerv]

I think I’m going to start a countdown. Since it’ll be 2 years, I can sell the house next year if I want next July/Aug, get another place, keep some cash build a cushion, and start the brick and mortar here. I need to figure out where legit home is at. Not gon lie, this a rough year, but I’m still moving forward. I’m gonna get every fuckin thing I want.

[swervgottiswerv]

I’m glad I went on that trip. I wouldn’t trade the time spent for nothing, but the feeling was – off. It wasn’t like that from the jump though, shit, I can’t even say I had any specific expectations from it, I just wanted to see her, but it was just something that was off. The end feeling I got was: empty. Very fuckin empty. Alcohol helped, but it didn’t really. By the end of the night when we got back, shortly after I just had this feeling that I had to leave. Way earlier than I planned to. But I couldn’t stay in that house. It wasn’t like that when I was in that house earlier. When we got back, and I was still fucked it a bit, it was something in my mind that said real stern like, “you need to leave, you need to get the fuck out of here”. I’ve only felt like that 1 other time – when was in Singapore at The 4 Floors – and I was sober that day. Anyway, this shit don’t matter. It only really mattered to me, and I knew there was going to be a high chance of it only mattering to me anyway. So I can’t be mad at no one. But I had to see that shit through. Even if I sensed signals to not go in the first place, I said I was gon show up, so I did. No regrets.

[swervgottiswerv]

I lost 40g’s. The climb to 49, and the slow-walked death down to 9. I learned a lot from this. It only takes a few days to be up. I don’t think I was greedy, but maybe I was. I took a whole month for it to go down. I had plenty of opportunities to take profit. That was bill money. That was half the mortgage on the house money. Art money. Never seen that type of money before. I took me a day to mentally recover. I still won’t ever forget this shit happened.

I will make it all back.

Plus.

Trust.

[swervgottiswerv]

[swervgottiswerv]

I will have my own shit.