#@simpzone

[seventhdiscipleworldwide]

Stop The Simpish Behavior.

[jev-urisk]

Val is so real for just trying to survive and Klaus is hot

Need more info on these two pretty please (especially fanart for Klaus if you have it 🤭)

You get it anon. I will absolutely hook you up.👍✨️

Valian info 🐁⛓️

Every world has it's criminals, and Valian knows a lot about what happens to the ones who get caught. Val has a collar around his neck and is at the beck and call of whatever demon is contracted to 'reform' him. It's exactly what society expects of a lowly ifrit like him.

Klaus info 🌻🥂

Klaus Calvaire is a man with a secret. Although he seems just as demonic as the other inhabitants of the capitol, he shares blood with their greatest enemy- The Fae. He will tear the demons' oppressive system down by infiltrating their glamorous society... if he can avoid getting caught.

Klaus Simpzone👅💦

Welcome to the Klaus simp club 🙏 please enjoy the following gifts.

He's pretty similar to Ben Barnes, who is the black-haired man in the pictures above.

Bonus thirst: he's well dressed and fastidious, is trained as a healer, muscles are built for climbing, 6'2", onyx eyes, loves gardening, and charming enough to fool a whole country.

Thanks for the ask! If you hunger for more you can search 7c_val or 7c_klaus on my profile✌️ also check out my 🌐7 Circles intro🌐!

[grey-marsh]

What other Rufus headcanons do you have, if you don't mind sharing?

Ah, this got real long so the head cannons are under the cut! I have so many thoughts about Rufus since he just shows up to be a dramatic bitch with no real explanation in the remake. I never actually played Before Crisis (just read the synopsis) so sorry if any of this is contradictory!

Rufus’s parents probably weren’t Great™ so I imagine he grew up with a lot of Turk bodyguards/babysitters.

This makes him the weirdest little kid

Like the type of kid who tries to keep the dead bird he finds

The Turks, looking at each other: These are things a normal healthy child does, right?

If he did have nannies none stuck around that long

He picked up too many habits and mannerisms from the Turks so they’re all just like “why is this child staring at me like that? am- am I in a horror movie? is this how I die?” then get out of there as fast as possible

It does not get better when he’s sent to school and finally has to interact with kids his own age

Turks: It’ll be fine- just be your self

Rufus: The human body can be drained of blood in 8.6 seconds given adequate vacuuming systems

Other children: *crying*

Turks: Okay. New plan!

The Turks try to teach him how to socialize with non-murders but mostly that just teaches him how to be incredibly manipulative and vaguely menacing

Rufus has no concept of money or how much things cost

“I mean it’s one banana, Rude. What could it cost? 100 gil?”

Rufus cannot drive and has zero desire to learn

I already made a post about his house arrest being like the safe house episode of Brooklynn Nine Nine but I also like the idea that one day Reno shows up for Rufus Watch and Rufus’ wrist is splinted and

Rufus: Do you want to know how I hurt my wrist? I was hula-hooping. Tseng and I tried it for fitness and fun

Reno: Oh my god

Rufus: We've mastered all the moves. The pizza toss, the tornado, the scorpion, the oopsie-doodle.

Reno: Why are you telling me this?

Rufus: Because no one will ever believe you

Rufus hacks into Shinra security during house arrest and spies on EVERYONE. He eventually starts asking the Turks to start dropping off random items and notes for him to stir up trouble. Not as part of a blackmail scheme but just for the drama of it all.

Back when Darkstar was Dark Nation I liked to think she was named after some piece of pretentious Gaian literature so Rufus could be smug whenever anyone asked about her name

I’m going to stop there for now, but I’m super excited to see what SE is going to do with Rufus since they cut his fascist villain speech and made him able to see the whispers!

[cratis]

If you also love any of these people

Mercymorn the First

the Saint of Joy

Cristabel's necromancer

The person who helped Harrow to avoid death by messing with her cortisol levels

The only person in the Mythreaum to actually save Harrow

The key piece to Dios Apate Major

The woman who tried to kill Jod

The strawberry blonde lyctor

The person with most knowledge of human anatomy in the universe

BoE's most tightly wounded member

please like this post and you'll get an instant follower

[generalthirstclub]

The voice actors for two of my , maybe not most bizarre but two definitely odd fictional crushes, interacted in a sitcom. Know that.

[sapphire-weapon]

What are your thoughts on Rufus and his half-brothers? Do you think he would have liked a relationship of any sort with them (like some attempt at a family, even) or to just know a bit more about them? Or maybe he doesn't regard them at all in that being blood-related doesn't mean jack? Idk if this is answered in the novellas, sorry if it's a repeat but love hearing your thoughts anyway.

crisis core goes into this a little bit and then the kids are alright really goes into the deep dive.

lazard hates rufus. he sees rufus as being complicit in all of president shinra’s atrocities. but there isn’t even one time that rufus is shown to even think about the man in return. he absolutely 100% knows that lazard exists, is his half brother, and has a high-ranking job in the company. and he doesn’t even care enough to try to think about him in any capacity, much less reach out to him (which basically means that rufus knew that lazard was worthless from the start and wouldn’t have even been helpful in a coup effort).

that’s in crisis core, just in a throwaway email that lazard sends out while he’s deteriorating and dying about how the president and the vice president are going to have to answer for their crimes or someshit. as far as we can tell, rufus looked at that email and went “lol get wrecked nerd.” he doesn’t send the turks out looking for him. he doesn’t address it. he doesn’t give a shit. couldn’t be paid to give a shit.

and then we get to the kids are alright.

i’ll just copypaste this from the book:

Rufus had a wry smile. It wasn’t his first time meeting a half-brother. There was no excitement, nor joy.

yeah, he doesn’t care.

the only real reaction that rufus has to evan is to make fun of him and start laughing hysterically at him multiple times because he knows how fucked this kid is just by virtue of the unfortunate reality of carrying their father’s genes. he puts evan to a test of sorts in order to see if he’s fully useless. evan pretty much fails because he sucks, and rufus turns to kyrie to smooth out a conflict instead.

also, rufus isn’t the one who seeks out evan. he doesn’t care if he meets him. reno sets up the whole thing, because reno feels some type of way about it and wants rufus to have a family. in fact, rufus only agrees to meet evan so that reno will get off his fucking back about it. 

“What happens after I meet them?”

“Well— Reno will be satisfied, at least.”

“…Then, let’s meet them, shall we?”

after that first meeting, the turks continue pursuing evan and keeping him safe, even though rufus never gives that order and still cannot be fucking fucked to care. he doesn’t stop them only because it gives them something to fucking do.

tseng is the only one who seems to understand this throughout the novel, and he’s willing to (and even attempts to) kill evan multiple times because he knows that rufus wouldn’t give a shit if he did and evan’s getting in the way of the pursuit of jenova and kadaj -- which is what rufus really cares about.

family means less than nothing to rufus. he’s interested in people who either genuinely care about him or who are useful to him (or both). he’s yet to meet anyone who falls under either of these criteria that is also blood related to him.

[bluescreening]

Playin TeeKO with the half life (vrai) simpzone gang. Here is the Sans Saga, courtesy of @drmememedic

[eggpea]

Currently waiting for someone to read fanfiction in the half-life(vrai) simpzone

Discord server with my shit internet, I'm excited :)

[buffywatching]

‘what else does buffy say about me 👉👈’ spike in simpzone part 7252683

[sonicfrontiers]

what’s up gamers and gays. are you a fan of the new hit stream team sweeping the nation, funny nut heroes will we are lentil soups and other soups radio tv solutions? do you want to meet and talk to other fans but are too intimidated by the official discord with over 7,000 members? well then you should check out this cool place called

WRTV for Cowards is a discord server for all fans of wrtv and friends who are too afraid to join the official server! we are completely fan-run, very small, and always open to new members!

some features include:

an optional channel you can opt-in to where a bot will announce every time a member of rtvs goes live so you’ll never miss a stream!

a friendly team of mods who are ready and able to help you however we can!

many channels to share your thoughts in, including video game chats, a channel to share your favorite music, the simpzone where we banish all simps, and a channel for sharing your dinner every night!

if you join the server please note you are required to share your dinner every day or there will be consequences

sometimes the dinners are bad. this is an unfortunate consequence of the dinner channel, but if we remove the dinner channel the entire server will collapse so we are required to keep it up and active

it is a load bearing channel

sahara wants me to tell you that they are cool and funny and definitely not seven dogs in a trenchcoat

also we have funny emotes :)

like funnybirds

so join us ok we have funnybirds :) and also a small group of people who all love the funny streamer man and his friends! 

join us with the link below!

https://discord.gg/2XpAnJU

[seventhdiscipleworldwide]

After The Friendzone Comes  The Basement...The Simpzone.

[herovid]

Apu c va de loz simpzon ;<; #memezad #oc

[arktoons]

I made it resolution this year that I will attempt to simpzonize everyone's waifus and husbandos. Before 2017 ends, a moment of silence for those who have fallen 3/3

[breezeinmonochromenight]

@simpzone dante worrying about putting too many holes in the wall for decorations and then quietly accepting that he wasn’t getting that deposit back, anyway:

dante signing a lease for an apartment every year wtf

I’ll take ‘sentences that make my mind completely white out for 30 minutes and soft reset’, Alex.

[freshthoughts2020]

[sapphire-weapon]

Idk what you consider nice balls but ya I can totally see Rude having the nicest ones.

nicely shaped, symmetrical, don’t hang down too low

rude got dem pornstar balls