#[screeches motorcycle to a stop on the side of the highway to fully uproot a rare plant with brute strength before speeding off]

[cartoonscientist]

going to the succulent expo really cemented my AU headcanon that Orin would be a better florist and Seymour would be a better dentist because I got to watch the hobbyist botanists cringe while hardcore plant freaks performed surgery on expensive cacti

one guy was like “This is a five hundred dollar cactus. LET’S CHOP IT UP!” [assorted moans of agony and cheers of excitement from the audience]

also the fact that you really have to “be mean” to your plants in order for them to thrive (aggressive pinching, stressing, depriving succulents of water until they start to shrivel, etc), and how unethical breeding practices really don’t exist for plants unless poaching is involved because you can do things to plants that would be a fucking war crime against an animal, just look up bonsai or forced mutation techniques (putting seeds and baby succulents in the microwave! injecting stems with teratogenic chemicals!)