#╰––– » 「 ⛦ 」 𝗱𝗮𝘀𝗵 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗺. ┊ bombastic side eye

[bleakfated]

"i do not look like a drowned rat and she has no room to talk about relationship anxiety."

[bleakfated]

sweats every time people remind him that dating azzie means literal god is his in law.

[bleakfated]

he doesn't want to get punched, but he will admit he is indeed a lucky bitch.

[bleakfated]

he would rather not dwell on how poorly he handled himself that night.

✞ ⸻ that whole conversation escalated so quick .

[bleakfated]

insert dirty dangle that was lucifer's nickname in high school joke here.

[bleakfated]

Nothing to say he's just beaming that he's the second favorite.

[bleakfated]

yeah, he's going to go ahead and die now. if teddy doesn't kill him first.

[bleakfated]

this can't possibly go worse than the first time, right? when she slept with the literal devil.

[bleakfated]

he would like everyone to know that he also enjoys ice cream.

[bleakfated]

wholly unimpressed by the fighting because of him. he appreciates ari's concern for him, but his heartbreak isn't only on jessica.

[bleakfated]

"You should just own it, Fergus."

“I do not have mommy issues.” 

[bleakfated]

he's already overheard jess offer him up as a dd to three other people, even though he's taking her and her friends back to his and teddy's place after shift. it's going to be a long night.

[bleakfated]

grumbling to himself as he orders a new bar rules sign for the crossroads with a new rule that says no fucking on the bar cameron.

[bleakfated]

❝ someone needs to tell the kid that a slim jim hardly counts as jerky. ❞

[bleakfated]

general tag drop

[bleakfated]

" it would imply that you're a monster, so no. absolutely not. "

" you know what? i wanna know too. . . . it's important. "