#⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀♱ ᵖʳᵒˢᵉ ˒ ﹕ ic.

[be4tdown]

disinterest in whatever was flickering across the television was quick to take the form of nosiness [ ... ] it would inevitably result in carrying himself behind the other to peer over their shoulder. out of sheer curiosity to find out what exactly was soaking up their attention —— WHEN THEY SHOULD BE INSTEAD FEEDING HIS BOREDOM. ( of course he's familiar enough with the sims ) but he'll be the first to admit he never understood the hype. what's so fun about playing out every day scenarios when it still included paying rent ?

what started off as a playful smile pulling on the corners of lips ; would quickly turn to the furrowing brows once he got a better look at the screen. THE SMILE REMAINED NEVERTHELESS , only it instead was quickly contorted into one closer resembling surprise and confusion. ❛❛ wait— why are they actually naked ? i thought they pixelated that shit. ❜❜ and he'll lean down to see better with a squint. ( wasn't this supposed to be rated t ? ) ❛❛ oh , they're fuckin' fucking— ❜❜

open starter because vic didn't know that they make mods for the sims.

[be4tdown-a]

but his legs are growing restless , and she keeps starting over , and he's bored , and [ ... ] WHAT IS HE SUPPOSED TO WASTE THE TIME STARING AT ? —— the wall ? face twisted with discontent with each tug that inevitably yanked his neck with it ; with each time she was dissatisfied with her results and had the audacity to blame him for her own misdoing. after granting her the privilege of playing with it in the first place , nevertheless.

@r4chelamber: stop moving and let me braid your hair.

a groan scratches his throat in response as he straightens out of his slouched back position. BRAIDING IT HADN'T BEEN THE PLAN. but the simple act of brushing it fresh out of the shower just hadn't been enough for her. ❛❛ it's not even long enough to braid. ❜❜ he assumes that was the root of the problem [ ... ] THE REASON SHE WAS HAVING TROUBLE. if only she would revert back to the soothing act of raking fingers through the dark locks , offering a massage ( instead of the abuse on his scalp. ) ❛❛ you're makin' my neck hurt. ❜❜

[be4tdown]

it's funny how so few words could strike the fear of god into his heart [ ... ] so few words that any metalhead that poured their dedicated sweat and the blood from their fingertips into their vest dreaded hearing. A GOOD HEARTED DEED THAT WAS RECIEVED BY SOMEONE WHO ACTED LIKE IT WAS THE WORST POSSIBLE NEWS THAT COULD HAVE BEEN DELIVERED. washing machines were in league with satan himself and who knows which of the nine circles of hell his patches and pins were forced to witness if that was the cruel fate they were dealt. ( sewing was never his specialty ) and every drop of his blood that had soaked into fabric in the process would be proof of that ; his décor was already threatening to barely hold on as it was.

@zerorisk (karen): i washed your vest. it smelled like beer and sweat.

❛❛ you hand washed it , right ? ❜❜ taking the clothing in question between tattooed hands , his attention would immediately be honed in on the large back patch for examination. ( and upon realizing it was still very much intact , ) it would then be turned in all different directions in search for anything too loose or worst of all —— missing. HE'LL CATCH HINT OF A FLORAL SCENT WHILE DOING SO. something far better than the questionable memories caked into it. but good luck getting the stubborn vocalist to admit that. once satisfied with his findings and once his heart was no longer on the verge of jumping out from his ribcage , a dark gaze would finally find her beneath long lashes with a small but teasing smile. ❛❛ the beer and sweat is part of the charm. ❜❜

[be4tdown-a]

@sleepsuffer: you're just a softie.

faux punches fell flat [ ... ] playful jabs against his arms and stomach , but he's almost convinced that she isn't pretending —— THAT THIS IS HOW HARD SHE ACTUALLY HITS. it's a worrying thought. ❛❛ oh , i'm a softie for not wanting to actually hurt you ? ❜❜ but he's smiling despite the insult ; standing stagnant while she continues to circle around him as if she were in a ring [ ... ] antagonizing her opponent in order to ensure an interesting fight. a vulture circling its prey. SURE , he could halt her movements at any time , ( how easy it would be to wrap inked fingers around guilty wrists and hold them just out of reach ) but where was the fun in that ?

❛❛ you hit like a niña. ❜❜ oh , he could dish it out just as well as he could take it —— and a laugh followed , a sound low that rattled in his chest. ❛❛ if you wanna act tough , you gotta at least make a proper fist— ❜❜ SO HANDS FINALLY REACHED OUT TO CATCH HERS [ ... ] before first and most importantly adjusting her thumb placement. ( keep it on the outside , keep it between your first two knuckles ) ❛❛ —or else you're gonna break your fuckin' thumb. ❜❜

[be4tdown]

nights like this always ended the same [ ... ] the ones where a few drinks became a few more ; where the line of just a few all too quickly became blurred and a bed became their final resting place. BUT NOT BEFORE THE DESPERATE SHEDDING OF THEIR CLOTHES. ( clawing away with them and discarding the afterthoughts towards the floor ) where once in the presence of a mattress acting as a safety net , time would suddenly slow down —— as if when in reality the sun wasn't far behind and threatening them with a scolding tone the consequences of their actions. the lesson had yet to be learned and whatever force was allowing it to happen questioned if it ever will.

@icebrgvdka: sender makes receiver look them in the eyes.

it was easy to lose focus when the leverage was in her hands ; his back pressed into the headboard while lap was her throne and his fingers nothing but pretty decoration for her waist. allowing eyes to flutter shut where long eyelashes would gently kiss the tops of his cheeks , WHEN THEY COULD HAVE JUST AS EASILY ROLLED INTO THE BACK OF HIS HEAD. a moment to instead place all attention on the feeling her body offered him —— fully appreciating the warmth enveloping him that would send a wave of heat at the base of his spine and dance along each vertebra. the way walls would flutter around him each time he bottomed out [ ... ] as if welcoming him after being away for too long. it so easily elicited soft sighs from between parted lips. COULD SHE BLAME HIM FOR LOOKING AWAY ? for allowing forehead to find a temporary home between breasts as her hips rise and fall against his own.

but it wouldn't last long before she pulled back and a hand reached out to grasp beneath his chin —— digits holding cheeks forcing his gaze to find hers from above. AND HE ALMOST MOANED AT THE SIGHT ALONE. inked fingers slid down towards grinding hips to properly grip them [ ... ] digging into the soft flesh when he gives a quiet whine as his own hips rolled upward. ❛❛ te ves tan hermosa , cariño— ❜❜ he'll lift her off of him for a short but woeful moment , just to slam her back down. he couldn't possibly contain the moan rattling the chords of his throat at the sudden but welcomed depth. ❛❛ —an' you feel so fuckin' good. ❜❜

[be4tdown-a]

it was parties like this that he always felt so out of place in [ ... ] IT DIDN'T MATTER HOW MANY HE'S ATTENDED , or how many he somehow continued to be invited to ; his climb up the glitzy ladder of success had been a quick one , and yet he's still convinced he doesn't belong in places like this. the places that were more proper and expensive than he's used to —— the ones that left him with the taste of champagne on his tongue instead of cheap beer or liquor. BUT THEY WEREN'T AS INNOCENT AS THEY SEEMED. ( why the fuck was he here ? ) it was a question he asked himself several times during this night alone [ ... ] in each room he entered full of glamor and pretty faces coked out of their minds. AND HOURS HAD PASSED ; here he still was. with company he hadn't expected to keep him for as long as she had.

@starsdreamt (nikki): sender writes a note [ her phone number ] on receiver's skin.

his gaze had been fixated on her with a smile as pen running low on ink scribbled numbers over flesh ; FINDING AN EMPTY SPOT ON HIS INNER FOREARM FOR SAFEKEEPING. it was a parting gift , one that came into existence upon realizing the time [ ... ] early hours of the morning approaching to put an axe into their fun. but he wasn't tired , and he didn't want to depart just yet. his hand extended out towards her once she pulled away upon finishing —— finding a place on her elbow as he leaned in closer. ❛❛ i wouldn't need it if you just came back with me. ❜❜

[be4tdown]

the question itself was one that could tip the scales [ ... ] put him out of commission for the remainder of the day from just the reminder. HE'S HOLDING IT TOGETHER WELL —— an attempt to keep himself composed the same as he always does ; convincing himself to ignore the way his stomach churned and wishing so badly he could slap the last couple of drinks out of his former selves hand. ( the version of victor from last night laughed and knew this would be future victor's problem , ) and he unfortunately was correct.

@malumxsubest: on a scale from one , to can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging , how hungover are you ?

but he currently lacked a proper response and would lift his hand instead with his eyes momentarily fluttering closed. ❛❛ shh— cállate. . . ❜❜ it's a quiet and soft command —— nearly a whisper as a beat passed. AND THE THROBBING WAVE OF PAIN IN HIS FRONTAL LOBE SOON FOLLOWED. gaze begrudgingly opened to find her. ❛❛ what are you yellin' so loud for ? ❜❜

[be4tdown]

it didn't matter how much time in his career passed [ ... ] how many of these things he'd be invited to , or how many he would actually attend —— any event that served expensive champagne instead of cheap beer would never quite sit comfortably with him. THERE WOULD ALWAYS BE THAT LINGERING FEELING OF NOT BELONGING. don't let the rolex sitting on his wrist or the designer suit that was currently suffocating him fool you , ( the glitz and glamour was never his style ) and he could never completely relax or have fun in a room full of people that he felt so out of touch with.

@metalsiren: at a table during an event gala.

he knows it's much easier for sawyer —— it's a lifestyle that she is well acquainted with and has had coursing through her veins from birth ; AND THERE'S A SMALL SENSE OF ENVY WHEN HE REMEMBERS THAT. ( he'll wonder if he could ever thrive within it. ) but he'll take getting used to it at the very least as a possibility for his future. at least he cleans up well , and knows how to play the part [ ... ] even if it's only him following her lead.

but he'll always come to the realization early on just how boring events such as this are —— as if he had forgotten and only remembered once he began fidgeting. ( TAPPING HIS FINGERS AGAINST THE TABLE , ) mindlessly pulling at the gold chain around his neck , or chewing his gum with more aggression than would normally be deemed necessary to ignore the itch for a cigarette. the latter was his current tactic [ ... ] cooling peppermint coating his tongue as he bounced the candy around in his mouth while a dark gaze was busy watching others around them. he'll finally lean in closer towards his date until lips that began to curl into a smirk found her ear. ❛❛ we're definitely the coolest people here. ❜❜

[be4tdown]

'i'd totally fuck you . . . anywhere. anytime."

it could barely be considered a confession [ ... ] not with the things they did with one another on an almost daily or nightly basis while finding themselves alone. ( really , time didn't matter. ) not with the sights or the sounds their bandmates or any other unlucky soul in passing would occasionally be subjected to. NO , IT WASN'T MUCH OF A CONFESSION AT ALL —— but that didn't mean he wouldn't feel the affect of them almost immediately. ❛❛ yeah ? ❜❜ and hands were quick to reach for her ; to pull her frame closer as his less than virtuous smile grew and almost became challenging. ❛❛ think you're gonna have to prove it , princesa. ❜❜

[be4tdown]

the vibration of his phone tucked beside pillow could have easily been shrugged off as a dream [ ... ] ignored and it would have allowed him to continue resting before the hungover rude awakening he would be met with upon sun soaking in through the window. and oh , how he now wished he had. INSTEAD , TIRED EYES FLUTTERED OPEN TO FIND LIGHT ILLUMINATING CEILING. ( and with it , ) her name and contact photo on the screen resting next to him. if by chance he had forgotten their heated quarrel only hours before in a sleep filled haze ; he hadn't anymore at the blurred sight of her face. it would instead come flooding back in a vigorous wave that harshly washed over him. and he would suddenly be left angry all over again —— he almost wouldn't answer and had half a mind to swipe a finger towards decline. WHAT WAS THAT SAYING ? ignorance was bliss.

arguments between the two were certainly not out of the question when alcohol was involved in the equation —— both would be found guilty in the case of not knowing when enough was enough. AND IN TURN NOT BEING ABLE TO TAME THE BEAST THAT INEVITABLY CLAWED ITS WAY OUT. where words become more slurred and talking turns to yelling , and trust is twisted into ammunition. where i can't fucking stand you is boldly met with you're just like your dad. ( that was aimed right for his jugular ) and it hurt worse than any other generic insult she decided to carelessly sling in his direction.

and he would suddenly be left angry all over again.

@metalsiren: i fucked up.

it's her warm greeting upon him reluctantly accepting the call and for a moment he's left wondering if he's still drunk. IF HE HAD HEARD HER CORRECTLY. and he wanted to laugh in response , but he'll instead roll into his previous position on his back instead and knuckles rubbed at the corners of his eyes. ( it's an apology , ) and he should take that into consideration instead of instinctually retorting back with something harsh and nasty no matter how badly he wished to. SO HE'LL EXPELL A HEAVY SIGH INTO THE PHONE. ❛❛ do you know what fuckin' time it is ? ❜❜

[be4tdown]

he was guilty of many things [ ... ] not quite knowing when to put a halt on his playful banter would be one to add to the never ending list. NEVER KNOWING IF HE'S GONE TOO FAR UNTIL IT'S TOO LATE , and hurting feelings in the process. ( but she could take it like a champ ) and deliver her own blows with a daring silver tongue ; it became more harmless the further their back and forth went —— clever retorts beginning to run dry and being replaced with devilish smiles and gazes with an intense burn as though attempting to ignite a fire within the other. HE STOOD EXPECTING ANOTHER HIT , patiently waiting for the next lighthearted gunshot to his chest with corners of lips twitching into a grin. but the venom spat in his direction wasn't as poisonous as he anticipated. he swallowed it whole with ease.

@twcbelts: bite me.

❛❛ ooh— ❜❜ lips twisting and it's an exaggerated coo as if her words had burned him , as if they had struck him directly where it hurt most. tattooed hand would find his chest and the beating heart beneath it to temporarily sell his pain. AND A LAUGH COULDN'T BE CONTAINED MUCH LONGER , crawling out from the depths of his throat. ❛❛ damn , that one really hurt , becks— ❜❜ [ ... ] hand fell as his jesting demeanor hardened just enough before continuing. ❛❛ si asi lo quieres , we can play that game too. ❜❜

[be4tdown]

it wasn't fair for him to expect everyone to know the rules [ ... ] ones that typically went unspoken amongst those who wore his same uniform. A UNIFORM MADE OF DENIM WITH POORLY STITCHED LOGOS FOR COMMUNAL IDENTITY AND A PLEDGED ALLEGIANCE TO THE BANDS THAT SPOKE TO YOU MOST. maybe it was a little silly —— to put so much effort and worry into an article of clothing that could so easily be replaced. but with blood spilled came a heavy sense of possession ; it was in more ways than one a part of him. only once he placed his focus on her was he glad he hadn't overreacted. SHE WAS ONLY TRYING TO HELP. and to any other eye aside from his own —— his vest certainly had needed it.

and the last thing he wanted was to make her feel bad , ( or for himself to come off as a complete asshole over something so minuscule. ) THE REMINDER THAT THIS WASN'T EXACTLY HER SCENE WAS AT THE BACK OF HIS MIND ; a world so similar yet still so different from the one she had previously came from. an adjustment period was inevitable —— and he would be happy to accompany her through it. his smile began to grow at her statement and he'll shake his head once the question followed.

❛❛ no , no— ❜❜ it's a tone attempting to reassure while still remaining casual ; AND HE BEGAN TO PULL THE VEST ON OVER HIS BACK. ❛❛ you're just like. . . . not supposed t'wash these things , yknow ? it can fuck up the patches. ❜❜ digits dug and buried themselves beneath the collar to untuck his hair , ( letting it lay freely over his shoulders ) and he'll once again find her with the hopes that he'd eased her mind. ❛❛ maybe we can make you one —— how good are you at sewing ? ❜❜

karen had been preoccupying her time since the infamous separation of CHICAGO 1979 ( she wasn't done being a rock star ! ) but the music scene evolved, expanded, developed into something far more complex . . . an adjustment to the genres she was still growing familiar with, a combination of stanzas the keyboardist would not have dared attempt in 1977. she welcomes it.

of course i know now what that meant for vic ! big fucking no ⸻ when he first asked me to play the keys for him, you have to remember that i had only ever known rock and roll. i wanted to make a good impression, help out . . . ( chuckles ) i learned my lesson. you let whatever has built up on those vests ferment. to say that i understand it fully now, well, i'd be lying. but if he was happy, so was i. i couldn't handle any other . . . well, turbulent creative spaces.

❛  of course i hand washed, wash machines are horrible for denim,  ❜ she shrugs as though it's obvious, crossing arms over her chest as some form of fortification, eyes following detailed inspection ⸻ ❛  did i do something wrong, victor?  ❜

[be4tdown]

how they have the bus to themselves, she'll never know. the sounds of chatter just outside barely registers to her as hazel hues drink in the peaceful face of the man she shares her bunk with. a moment thay causes time to slow, a sudden overwhelming need taking over; impulsiveness wins, pressing soft kisses to vic's neck and jawline in an attempt to gently wake him.

once she knows he's coherent enough, she adjusts herself onto an elbow, propped up and peering over him. long, brunette tresses fall over her shoulders, in their natural state of soft waves as she manages to catch his gaze, a bright, cheeky grin pulling at her lips, " so, what if i asked you out on a date ... like, a real date? "

the first miracle is being gifted a tranquil morning [ ... ] A MOMENT SO RARE IT MUST HAVE BEEN PASSED DOWN DIRECTLY FROM THE HANDS OF GOD HIMSELF. the bastard must have finally decided to give the pair a break —— or maybe those that occupy her bus are simply more considerate of their fellow bandmates. ( the same couldn't be said for his own. ) he was the least morning friendly of the group and often suffered the dire consequences of it in the form of rude awakenings. the second miracle is being able to sleep as well as one possibly could in a small bunk certainly not built for more than one person at a time [ ... ] but they somehow managed to make it work. AND HE WOULD SWEAR UP AND DOWN THAT HERS WAS MUCH MORE ROOMIER. that his long limbs didn't need to bend as much , that he could stretch out just a little bit more.

any dream that he was in the middle of would suddenly be tugged away and he would have complained if it weren't for the feeling of lips against his neck ; haphazardly placed and traveling along the slope of his jaw —— A QUIET AND RASPY GROAN VIBRATED HIS THROAT INSTEAD ONCE SHE STOPPED. didn't she know that she can't just kiss him like that if she didn't have other ideas ? the first thing his gaze catches upon begrudgingly opening is her watching him from above , bright eyed and wide smile and all. even if it was still a bit blurred [ ... ] it isn't the worst sight to wake up to. he'll slowly blink a few times ( once. twice. third times the charm. ) and his own smile begins to grow. ❛❛ that's what you're wakin' me up to ask ? ❜❜

a soft laugh manages to escape him and an inked hand would raise to rub at his eyes still tinged with sleep —— before turning to better face her. ❛❛ what's a real date ? ❜❜

[be4tdown]

it wasn't his first location of choice to spend their time together [ ... ] in fact , it was incredibly far down on his list of preferences. but who was he to deny a pretty girl who desired his company —— EVEN IF IT MEANT FOLLOWING HER AROUND LIKE A LOST PUPPY DOG. inked digits running lazily over the spines of books in the midst of doing so , a dark gaze not even bothering to read the titles as he passed ; continuing his path behind her , the letters blurred together even if he wanted to acknowledge them. he was clearly bored [ ... ] uninterested and growing more and more tired of being here while she continued her search for something specific. ( she'd told him what it was ; but it currently escaped him. ) a part of him suspected she had forgotten as well considering their preoccupied state.

@starsdreamt (christine): our muses have sex in a library and one is doing everything they can to make the other make noise.

perhaps it should be more surprising that she hadn't swatted away his very clear intentions ; TAKING HER HAND INTO HIS AND LEADING HER AWAY TO AN UNOCCUPIED SECTION. though they had several to choose from [ ... ] apparently it wasn't the most popular place to spend a weekend afternoon. what had started as him leaning her against a shelf while his hands explored beneath a sundress and lips gifted open mouthed kisses against her neck —— she still hadn't denied him and he wondered if she would. NOT EVEN WHEN DIGITS WRAPPED THEMSELVES AROUND LACY UNDERWEAR , nor when he tugged on them enough to allow them to fall towards ankles. a swift bend from him and a quick popping of her foot from her ; into his pocket they went for safekeeping.

time seemed to move at a much different pace after that [ ... ] when he moved her towards the much more steady placement of the wall that was behind them ; when he removed his hands from her body for only a moment to undo the button of his jeans , and when he lifted her beneath thighs in order to press her back into the wall they found sanctuary at. WITH LEGS WRAPPED AROUND HIS CENTER , the angle at which he finally pushes himself into her has him stifling his own groan with teeth catching his bottom lip instead. ( time was of the essence whether he liked it or not ) and there isn't much of it to allow too much adjustment , before he's pulling out and snapping his hips back into her —— HE LEANS IN TO PLACE A KISS OVER HER CHEEK.

❛❛ you're so quiet , mi amor— ❜❜ it's teased into her ear with a whisper ; a smile growing across features as another harsh thrust was offered. ( it's mean ) AND HE KNOWS IT , to attempt to coax those sweet cries from between her lips in the worst possible place he could. and if they get caught ? well , there's other libraries in town. his tempo begins to pick up and he snuffs out his breathy whimpers ; conveying his affection by keeping his gaze on her with still a devilish grin. ❛❛ doesn't it feel good ? ❜❜

[be4tdown]

oh , he missed the comfort of his own home. THE COMFORT OF HIS OWN BED. it's the smaller things you take for granted while you're on the road [ ... ] ( yeah , yeah sure ) missing your family and friends for months on end and having to resort to phone conversations or video calls obviously sucked. but having a consistent sleeping situation was currently at the top of his list. SOME NIGHTS WERE COZY HOTEL MATTRESSES ; while most others were tucked away in his bunk on a bus that was shared with a group of dudes. the shit was not glamorous , and he'll laugh at any liar that says life on tour was one of comfort.

@bnchee: i left my bra and sneakers in your bunk.

❛❛ trust when i say i know you did. ❜❜ it's replied as if having to relive the war flashbacks from the night before —— TRYING TO SLEEP WHILE THE BUS TOOK SHARP TURNS AND SHOOK ITS POOR PASSENGERS INSIDE. all the while tossing and turning and feeling as though there was something beneath him [ ... ] and ultimately peeling a more than familiar undergarment out from under his pillow. ❛❛ i literally slept on your bra , chiquita. ❜❜ any notion that he was annoyed at the memory would quickly dissipate , however , suddenly melting away and making enough room for a mostly crooked smile. ❛❛ didn't see your shoes though. ❜❜

[be4tdown]

maybe he would even be so bold as to consider it a bonding experience —— as fucked and twisted as most would find that idea to be ; it could be comparable to coming out of battle hand in hand with your partner. BLOOD AND BRUISES AND ALL. how terribly rare was it to find many willing to brace the depths of hellfire with him [ ... ] let alone kiss him afterwards. and even better: kiss him with the grime still fresh. ( that's the most beautiful thing of it all , he thinks. ) there's no hesitation in her actions to still hold him skin to skin without recoiling in disgust from the sweat giving him his current shine.

( OF COURSE , ) lulu wasn't spared from the filth the pit had graciously gifted them. but how was it that she came out of it almost hotter than when she went in ? ( he'll owe it to good genes , ) AND THE GLOW OF FEELING LIFE REFRESHED.

her lighthearted complaint temporarily brought his attention towards her ass and he'll laugh as she gave it a tap. ❛❛ mi pobre bebé— i'll make it feel better later. ❜❜ another laugh , and the kiss is returned before her hand wrapped around his own is brought towards his lips. PLACING SEVERAL AFFECTIONATE KISSES OVER HER KNUCKLES. it'll only take a moment of faux contemplation , but his mouth was practically watering at the thought alone of a drink [ ... ] and he was quick to agree. ❛❛ —make it a white claw and you've got a deal. ❜❜

        There was a certain bond that could only be found in the depths of a mosh pit to thumping music. You were just as likely to be knocked over as you were to be picked up. There was camaraderie – among the participants. To Lulu, it was beautiful even magical. She loved the scene almost as much as she loved Victor.

        Even covered in sweat and mire, Lulu seemed radiant. The smile on her face was as bright as ever as she took Victor's hand within hers. It was glorious to have a partner with whom she could share this. He looked so handsome post-mosh pit. It filled her stomach with butterflies, just like the first time they met. She concurred with him – these were the moments when one truly felt alive.

         "I'm like so totally gonna have the biggest bruise on my butt tomorrow!!" Playfully she smacked her ass with her free hand, "Wanna like – grab a beer? Take the sting off?" She leaned up on her tippy toes and to place a quick peck on his lips.