#하지만

[sonsband]

mutuals can we form a kpop group please

[snufkinsong]

together me and my 11 followers make 12..

[charles-j-h-oh]

Amelia Bedelia가 운전을 한다고?! 🚗 과연 무사할까? Good Driving, Amelia Bedelia #영어원서 ...

[selkieblood]

우리가 함께 보낼 수 있었던 모든 시간을 생각하면 너무 고통스러워요

[insight03-blog]

포토샵으로 물결 효과, 물 반사 효과 만들기 - photoshop

[sina-hellow]

칼라마르 헤드케논: 왜 웃고 있었을까? / Kallamar’s Headcanon: Why was he grinning?

ENG: Once we finish Demon Quest, we’re met with a this screen. Many people find it strange that Kallamar is grinning so brightly, like a child. I used to think the same. So this time, I’d like to share a headcanon analyzing Kallamar’s psychological state. Honestly, I don’t think Kallamar was ever truly happy—even back when he was a Bishop. Compared to his siblings, he was the most anxious and timid. That’s why he relied on Shamura, the eldest, and feared Narinder, the third-born and the overseer of death. And I believe this fear existed even before Narinder ever plotted his betrayal. The Kallamar that Narinder remembers was always the brother who looked at him with fear. Because of this, I believe Kallamar was the one least suited to wear the crown. Yet unlike Haro, he couldn’t let go of his divinity. Whether it was out of a desire to survive or a need for power… either way, these elements clashed with his true nature, leaving him to live a life gripped by fear, crushed under the weight of the crown.

But now? The Bishops and Narinder alike have been dethroned by the Lamb. They’ve lost their divinity and become followers. Ironically, it’s because Kallamar became a follower that he’s finally able to be his true self. He no longer needs to hold onto power, nor hide in Shamura’s shadow. For the first time, he’s free to live life on his own terms. And I don’t think Kallamar fears Narinder anymore. What he feared was the Red Crown(death)—not Narinder himself. It was only after becoming a follower that he was finally able to see Narinder not as the embodiment of the Red Crown, but simply as a cat.🐱 Now that he has nothing left to fear, maybe that’s why he can smile so brightly after the Demon Quest?😆

우리는 주교들의 유물 정화를 마치면 다음과 같은 화면을 보게 되죠. 그런데 여기서 칼라마르는 어린아이처럼 해맑게 웃고 있는데, 이를 이상하게 생각하는 사람들이 많더라고요. 저도 사실 그렇게 생각했고요. 그래서 이번에는 칼라마르의 심리 상태를 분석한 헤드캐논 글을 적어볼게요. 사실, 칼라마르는 과거 주교였을 때도 썩 행복한 녀석은 아니었을 거예요. 다른 형제자매들에 비해 가장 불안정하고 겁이 많았으니까요. 그렇기 때문에 첫째였던 샤무라에게 의지를 했으며, 셋째이자 죽음을 관장하는 나린더에겐 두려움을 느꼈죠. 그리고 이건 나린더가 사악한 음모를 꾸미기 전부터 그래왔을 거로 생각해요. 나린더가 기억하는 칼라마르는 항상 자신을 두려워했던 형이었으니까요. 이런 이유로 주교 중에서도 왕관과 가장 어울리지 않는 캐릭터라고 생각해요. 하지만 하로처럼 신격을 포기하지 못했어요. 그 이유가 살아남기 ���해서였든, 권력이 필요했든... 어찌됐든 간에 이 요소들은 칼라마르의 본성과 맞물려 왕관에 짓눌린 채 공포에 사로잡힌 삶을 살아왔죠. 하지만 지금은? 어린 양에 의해 주교들과 나린더 모두 찬탈당해 신격을 잃고 추종자가 되었어요. 아이러니하게도 추종자가 되었기 때문에 칼라마르는 이제서야 '진짜 자신'이 될 수 있었던 거죠. 더는 권력을 유지할 필요도 없고 샤무라의 그림자 속에 숨지 않아도 되었으며 처음으로 자기 인생을 선택할 수 있게 되었으니깐요. 그리고 지금의 칼라마르는 나린더를 두려워하지 않을 거로 생각해요. 칼라마르가 두려워했던 건 붉은 왕관(죽음)이지, 나린더 그 자체는 아니었으니까요. 추종자가 되고 나서야 비로소 나린더를 붉은 왕관이 아닌 단지 한 마리의 고양이로 인식하게 되었을 거예��.🐱

이제 더는 두려워질 게 없어졌기에 유물 정화 이후 싱글벙글한 표정을 지은 것 아닐까요?😆

[twst-blueoctopi]

로열 AU를 요청할 수 있나요? 제이드는 집사이고 리더는 그가 일하는 공주인가요?

글을 정말 좋아합니다. 하지만 번역하는 데 시간이 너무 오래 걸리네요...

🍄 익명

물론 기꺼이 도와드리겠습니다!

번역은 죄송합니다… 제가 너무 게을러서 직접 할 수가 없네요.

[Rough translation || 🍄: Can I request a Royal AU? Jade is the butler and the reader is the princess he works for? I really enjoy your writing. But it takes so long to translate… || Me: Of course, I'd be happy to! I'm sorry about the translation…I'm too lazy to do it myself.]

Silver Service

𝖆/𝖓: I think the cuts are a bit rushed but finals are coming up and I wanted to get stuff done :<

𝖙𝖜: Mild violence (assassination attempt), poisoning

𝖕𝖆𝖎𝖗𝖎𝖓𝖌: jade x royal au!reader

𝖜𝖔𝖗𝖉𝖘: 1208

𝖙𝖆𝖌𝖑𝖎𝖘𝖙: @luxaryllis @thegoldencontracts @waterthatsmoe @oya-oya-okay @writingattemptsxx

The royal palace was silent more often than it was loud. Even the servants walked as if on glass, voices hushed beneath vaulted ceilings and chandeliers. You had grown up in that silence. And Jade Leech fit into it like a puzzle piece made for shadows.

They called him a diplomatic gift—your own personal butler, handpicked by the Kingdom of Coraline. But nothing about Jade had ever felt like a gift. He was too elegant, too precise, too observant. He watched everything, said little, and moved with the slow, deliberate grace of a predator in a silk coat.

Every morning, he greeted you with a bow and a softly spoken, “Good morning, Your Highness,” before placing your tea just so on the table beside the balcony doors.

And every morning, you tried not to look too long into the eyes that gleamed mismatched—one gold, one blue.

You weren't supposed to feel this way about him.

But you did.

It started on a morning much like any other. You were walking in the eastern gardens, parasol in hand, with Jade trailing behind at a respectful distance.

"You walk too far behind me," you said without turning.

"Forgive me," came his smooth reply. "Protocol dictates—"

"I’m the Princess. Protocol bends if I say it does."

There was a pause. The crunch of gravel under his shoes grew nearer.

"You’re in a mood today," you added.

Jade only smiled. “You’re always in a mood, Your Highness. It’s what makes you interesting.”

You turned to face him. He had stopped at a proper distance again, but his smile lingered like the scent of roses in the breeze.

"You’re lucky I like you," you said.

His smile shifted—smaller, deeper. “Luck, or intention?”

You said nothing. But your heart fluttered in a way it shouldn't have.

Rain fell against the glass as you sat across from him in your private study, the two of you sharing an unusual moment of quiet over tea. Unusual, because he had chosen to sit across from you. At your request.

“It’s strange,” you said, “how someone can be by your side every day and still feel like a mystery.”

Jade tilted his head, amused. “Would you like to solve me, Your Highness?”

You took a sip of your tea. “Perhaps.”

There was something in the way he watched you now. Not just dutiful. Curious. Unafraid.

"You know everything about me," you murmured.

"I observe everything about you," he corrected. “Knowing… requires permission.”

The words hung in the air, trembling.

The attack came without warning.

It was a quiet brunch with foreign dignitaries. Jade, as always, was at your side, attentive and poised. He handed you your tea himself. He had prepared it. Tested it. Or so he thought.

You took one sip. Just one.

Then the world tilted.

The cup slipped from your fingers and shattered. You heard his voice first—panicked, breaking, not like Jade at all.

"Your Highness!"

He caught you before you hit the ground.

Servants screamed. Guards surged forward. The dignitaries recoiled. But Jade—Jade held you like he’d never let go.

"Poison," he said through gritted teeth. "Bring the physician. Now."

Your eyes fluttered closed. You felt cold.

And then, you felt nothing.

The royal physician worked through the night. The poison—exotic, rare, something from the sea—had ravaged your system. No one knew how it had passed through the usual security measures.

Jade hadn't left your side once.

He remained seated at your bedside, one hand in yours, his eyes hollow with fury and fear.

"She'll wake," the physician had said.

"But will she be the same?" Jade had asked, voice low and cold.

Now, in the silence of your bedchamber, he sat alone with you.

"I failed you," he whispered. "I was meant to protect you. And I—"

His voice caught. Jade Leech, the perfect butler, did not cry. But something in him cracked.

"I can’t lose you," he said softly. "Not when I’ve only just… realized."

He bowed his head and kissed your fingers.

You woke to his hand in yours.

He jolted upright at your weak breath. “Your Highness?”

Your throat was dry. Your body felt like it had drowned and come back. But the only thing you could focus on was the way he looked at you—relieved, exhausted, reverent.

"You’re still here," you croaked.

“Of course,” he said. "Where else would I be?"

Your voice trembled. “You didn’t sleep?”

His smile was thin. “I wouldn't have dared.”

You looked at him for a long time. And then—softly—"I missed you."

He inhaled like you'd wounded him.

“You should not say things like that,” he murmured.

“Why?” you whispered.

“Because I’ll believe them.”

When you could walk again, you summoned Jade to your chambers.

"You still haven't told me who did it," you said.

He stood by the window, pale and elegant, hands clasped behind his back. “We suspect one of the visiting dignitaries. Or… someone close.”

Your heart turned cold.

"Someone in the palace?"

He nodded.

"Then you need to protect yourself, too," you said. "I’m ordering you to."

Jade turned to you slowly, and for once, his calm slipped.

“No,” he said. “My life is yours.”

"Don’t say that," you snapped. "Don’t reduce yourself like that!"

"I am your butler."

"You are not just my butler!" you said, rising to your feet.

Jade’s expression broke. And then—finally—he stepped toward you.

"You’re right," he said quietly. “I am more.”

He stopped just in front of you.

“I am a man who has loved you from the moment you first asked me to walk beside you.”

Your confession came two days later.

"I love you," you said, under moonlight and behind closed doors.

Jade stood frozen for a moment. Then he smiled—a true smile, rare and warm.

"And I love you," he said, voice trembling. "But you are royalty. And I am—"

"You are mine," you said, stepping closer. “My choice. My heart.”

He cupped your cheek, eyes glinting with something more than devotion—hope.

"If we do this," he whispered, "there will be war. There will be scandal."

You nodded. “Then let there be both. But let there also be us.”

He kissed you.

And it was not soft. It was real. Years of restraint poured into a single moment.

The court did not take it well.

Rumors spiraled. Accusations flared. But you stood firm, and so did Jade.

When the investigation concluded, it was discovered that the attempt on your life had been orchestrated by a noble jealous of your favor toward Jade—afraid of what power he might gain at your side.

You had them exiled.

Jade never asked you to defend him. But you did.

And that, more than any vow, told him everything.

Years passed.

They still called him your butler, even after the engagement was announced. But you both knew the truth.

He wasn’t just your servant.

He was your partner. Your protector. Your confidant. Your first dance at every ball. The last person you saw before sleeping. The first you saw at sunrise.

The tea he made every morning now came with a kiss.

And every time he said, “Good morning, Your Highness,” you smiled and whispered,

“Good morning, my love.”

credit to @fae-and-wolf for divider

[crk-kr-to-en]

I saw somewhere that there’s a scene where PV is going down a hallway and there’s like pictures of SM (I think?) and he says “Poor thing, it no longer knows what it desires” and I’m wondering where it’s from and what the original KR version said, if you can find it （ーー；）

Pure Vanilla Cookie: Once the brilliant Fount of Knowledge, the source of all there is to know, now lay shattered...

퓨어바닐라 쿠키: 스스로의 모순을 견디지 못하고 산산조각나 버렸군요.

Pure Vanilla Cookie: You couldn't stand your own contradictions and broke them into pieces.

Pure Vanilla Cookie: Crushed by the weight of its own contradictions. 

퓨어바닐라 쿠키: 한 때는 태초부터 시작된 지식의 근원이었으며

Pure Vanilla Cookie: You were once the source of knowledge from the very beginning

(They switched the lines. This is actually happens a lot.)

Pure Vanilla Cookie: It's heart: divided by force. 

퓨어바닐라 쿠키: 결국에는 억지로 분리된 지식의 선구자로서의 신념이.

Pure Vanilla Cookie: In the end, the belief as a Pioneer of Knowledge that is forcibly separated.

Pure Vanilla Cookie: Poor, sorry thing. It no longer knows what it desires.

퓨어바닐라 쿠키: 가엾게도 더이상 스스로가 원하는 것이 무엇인지도 알지 못하게 된 채로...

Pure Vanilla Cookie: Poor thing didn't even know what it desired anymore...

Broken Belief: Poor? Sorry?

부서져버린 누군가의 신념: 가엾다구요?

Someone's Broken Belief: You feel sorry for me?

Pure Vanilla Cookie: …!

퓨어바닐라 쿠키: ...!

Pure Vanilla Cookie: …!

Broken Belief: And you...

부서져버린 누군가의 신념: 스스로가 원하는 것이 무엇인지 알지 못하게 된 건...

Someone's Broken Belief: I don't know what I desire...

Broken Belief: ...do you know what you desire?

부서져버린 누군가의 신념: 당신도 마찬가지일텐데요...?

Someone's Broken Belief: I'm sure it's the same for you...?

Pure Vanilla Cookie: …

퓨어바닐라 쿠키: ...

Pure Vanilla Cookie: …

Pure Vanilla Cookie: You're right.

퓨어바닐라 쿠키: 맞아요.

Pure Vanilla Cookie: That's right.

Pure Vanilla Cookie: I might have strayed... from my roots and principles...

퓨어바닐라 쿠키: 이미 전 근원과 신념을 잃었을지도 몰라요.

Pure Vanilla Cookie: I may have already lost my roots and beliefs.

Pure Vanilla Cookie: Just like the master of this tower.

퓨어바닐라 쿠키: 이 탑의 주인이 그러했듯이...

Pure Vanilla Cookie: Just like the master of this tower did...

Pure Vanilla Cookie: But I will never.

퓨어바닐라 쿠키: 하지만 절대로.

Pure Vanilla Cookie: But never.

Pure Vanilla Cookie: Never. Become like him.

퓨어바닐라 쿠키: 그와 같이 되지는 않을 거예요.

Pure Vanilla Cookie: It's not going to be like that.

☆

Screenshots below for convenience.

[bts-trans]

250129 Weverse Translation

Jimin's Post ❇️

아미여러분 지민입니다. 재작년 12월에 입대해 어느덧 해가 두번이나 바뀌었습니다. 1년 2개월정도 군생활을 하고 있는중인데 예.. 정말 이곳에서는 시간이 다르게 흘러가는 것 같습니다. 쉽지만은 않지만 그래도 느끼고 배워가는 것들이 있기에 그동아안 있었던 일들을 여러분들과 재밌게 대화할 날들이 얼른 오기를 기다리고 있습니다. 음 저의 일상은 크게 달라지지 않있어요. 아무래도 군대이다 보니 훈련받고 일과하고 운동하고오면 어느새 하루가 지나가고 또 잘시간이 찾아오는 그런 같은 일상에 살아가고 있어요. 다른게 있다면 해가 바뀌고나서 저와 정국이가 자기전에 나누는 대화들이 많이 바뀌었어요. 아미여러분들과 만날 날들이 점점 가까워져 가고 있기 때문에 우리가 다시마주하게 될 그 때를 생각하며 만나기전에 우리가 준비해야할 것들 혹은 앞으로 어떤 모습들을 보여줄지 앞으로 우리는 어떤 삶을 살아가게 될지 등 많은 대화를 이어 나가고 있어요. 사실 좀 무섭다의 감정도 있긴 합니다. 저희가 다같이 공연을 한지도 정말 적지않은 시간들이 지났고 무대와 음악을 위해 온전히 시간을 쏟은지도 조금 되었기에 조금 두렵기도 하지만 지금껏 기다려주신 여러분들을 위해 최고의 무대를 선사할 것이라는 마음은 변하지 않습니다. 열심히 준비할게요 정말.. 노력하겠습니다 정말 괜찮은 모습으로 복귀할게요. 그립고 또 마냥 감사하기만한 우리 아미여러분들 만나는 날까지 부디 몸건강하시고 언제나 행복한 마음이 드는 그런 하루를 보내시기루바라게요 새해복많이 받으세요 아미 사랑합니다 진짜로요 💜 아니 그니깐 진짜루요 ㅎ 💜 (https://weverse.io/bts/artist/2-155226765)

Hello ARMYs, this is Jimin. I enlisted in December the year before last, and at some point the years changed twice. I've been serving in the military for about a year and two months and yeah… I really feel like time flows differently here. It hasn't been easy per se but there are things that I'm learning and feeling along the way, and I'm just waiting for the day I can tell you all about it and we can have some fun conversations.

Well, my life hasn't really changed that much. This is the military after all, so I'm just living the same life - I do my training, daily tasks, work out and just like that, the entire day's gone by and it's time to sleep.

If I had to think of one thing that's changed, it would be the year, and with that, the conversations I have with Jungkookie before we go to bed. Those have changed a lot. The day we'll be able to meet all you ARMYs is getting closer, so we're thinking about seeing you again, and about all the things we'll have to get ready before that, or what kind of things to show you in the future and what kind of lives we'll be living, etc. We're talking about a lot of things.

To be honest, there's also this worry that it's going to be a little scary. It's been a really long time since we all performed together, and it's also been a while since we spent all our time working on music and performing. So I am a little scared, but my intention to present the best possible performance for you, ARMYs who have been waiting all this time, has not changed.

I'll put a lot of effort into getting it all ready, I really will.. I will work so hard, I will come back as someone with really quite good things to show you.

To our ARMYs, who I miss so much and who I am just eternally grateful for- Until the day we meet, please take care of your health, and I hope that you're always having days that make you happy.

Happy new year, ARMY. I love you

I really do💜

I mean, honestly,

I really do heh💜

Trans cr; Aditi @ bts-trans © TAKE OUT WITH FULL CREDITS

[pettyofficial]

2025.2.18.

오랜만에 글을 씁니다.

요즘은 부쩍 날이 추웠습니다. 낮에도 영하로 떨어지는 날이 자주 와서 꽁꽁 얼어붙은 한강위로 고양이가 걸어다닐만큼이요.

저는 매년 똑같은 루틴이 반복되다 보니까 예전만큼 열정이 덜 한 게 문제인 거 같습니다.

올해도 3월 말경까지 열심히 보고서를 써서 냅니다. 좋은 성과가 따라오면 좋겠습니다.

다들 건강관리 잘 하세요. 요즘은 몸이 예전같지 않다고 느끼고 있습니다. 다음날 숙취가 심하고 자주 체하고 자주 배탈이 나네요.

이렇게 나이를 이렇게 먹는데, 아직 자녀는 커녕 결혼도 못했다는 현실에 조금은 억울해지는 요즘입니다.

하지만 다정하게 마음을 담아 어여쁘게 잘 해내겠습니다. 늘 그래왔듯이요.

어서 봄날이 오면 좋겠습니다.

[nikifyme]

Live sessions

pairing: niki x reader

genre: idol!au, fluff, secret relationship.

warnings: none. Just too much fluff tbh

summary: you’re in NewJeans, dating Niki from Enhypen on the low. One night you go live and sing his song, “Fever,” catching Niki off guard .

word count: 1.4k

⸻

You never thought dating an idol in the same company would be lowkey complicated. Especially someone like Niki, whose every move gets dissected by fans worldwide, whose songs play in every corner of Seoul, and whose presence is as intense as the spotlight on stage.

But here you are. A year into your debut with NewJeans, juggling practice, interviews, and the unspoken rule: keep your relationship under wraps. Fans don’t know. The public doesn’t know. But the late-night texts and stolen hoodies? Yeah, those are real.

⸻

That night, you’re in your dorm, tired and wired, wrapped in Niki’s oversized hoodie. Your phone lights up with fans begging for a live.

“I’m tired but bored,” you say, “Let’s do something fun.”

Chat floods with:

“sing fever plz”

“I feel like she’d eat with enhypen style music”

“pls sing an enhypen song ”

You smirk. Why not? You pull up Fever by Enhypen and start singing. But this isn’t a cover—it’s your version, soft and slow, like a secret whispered.

⸻

You sing:

Ah-ah-ah-ah

Give me fever

얼음 같은 눈 (그 붉은 눈빛)

Breaking me in two (나를 흔들지)

왕좌에 앉은 네 앞에 설 때

내 안에 타는 불길 (타는 불길)

You pause, fingers tapping your phone screen, eyes gleaming with mischief.

What I gotta do? (뜨거운 손이)

너를 찾아도 (I cannot have it)

너에게 손대선 안 돼 절대

하지만 이끌리지, 난 아플수록 널 원해

The chat explodes: “OMG SHE KNOWS THE LYRICS” “I KNEW SHE WOULD COOK” “NIKI PLEASE WATCH.”

You smile wider, voice dipping lower, almost like you’re confessing a secret.

멈춰, 제발, 멈추지 마

멈춰, 제발, 멈추지 (ah)

너 때문에 온몸이 타올라

너 때문에 심장이 목말라

Halfway through, you add your own little twist — a falsetto that makes you giggle.

Like a fever, fever, fever, fever

널 안고 싶어, 널 안고 싶어

And just when you hit the chorus, your phone buzzes: a text from Niki.

My🤍:“You’re insane. Stop embarrassing me.”

You laugh out loud, hiding your face behind the phone.

밀어내도, 내 안에 타올라

재가 돼도, 불꽃이 피어나

Like a fever, fever, fever, oh

널 알고 싶어, 널 알고 싶어

⸻

Somewhere in a dimly lit practice room, Niki’s shoulders relax for the first time all day. He watches the live replay, smiling at how effortlessly you make his world yours.

And you? You end the live, shrugging.

“Don’t @ me if I messed up the Korean.”

The chat responds with endless tags of the enhypen page.

⸻

Later that night, you post a black-and-white IG story:

The lyrics softly typed across the screen, “널 알고 싶어~”

Just to show the world that your bond is strong and I would take so much to destroy…or would it?

AIGHT THIS IS SO TRASH PLEASE DONT I JUST LOVE FEVER ITS MY SOTY

[caseinnitrateeee]

토키가 많아요... 이이이잉🤏🏻🤏🏻 작은! 하지만 잔인하죠..

[a-sctir-a-day]

Q. Will Director Song take a summer vacation? If so, what will he spend his time doing? Will Sung Hyunje and Yoojin-ie barge in?

Song Taewon has never taken a proper vacation. Even in the story, he actually just pretended to be on leave, right?

If he really took a vacation, Han Yoojin and Sung Hyunje would just watch over him from afar so that he could rest properly and thoroughly. However, Song Taewon would be too anxious and probably prefer to keep them by his side.

Q. 송실장님 여름휴가 쓰시나요? 쓰신다면 뭘 하면서 보낼까요? 성현제랑 유진이가 난입하나요? └ 근서 22.06.24 20:22 | 송태원은 휴가를 ���대로 쓴 적이 없습니다. 작중에서도 사실상 휴가 낸 척만 했었죠. 정말로 휴가를 낸다면 한유진과 성현제는 푹 쉬도록 멀리서 지켜만 볼 겁니다. 하지만 송태원이 불안해서 차라리 곁에 두고 싶어 하겠지요.

[hjgiil]

균형있는삶 건강한몸을 가지고 싶다고 하지만 막상 그러기 위해 노력하는게 없단걸 안다 어디서 오는 불안일까 난 왜 이럴까

[sina-hellow]

나린더의 가족형성 / How Narinder’s family came to be

ENG: Narinder raising 3-day-old Aym and Baal in Purgatory for 50 years is incredible—what a shocker! But when the Lamb brings Aym and Baal back, Narinder says: 'Salvaged from the void, they are yours now. Do with them as you wish, scornful God. I care not for them.' At first, this may seem cold or irresponsible. However, according to JoJo, the story’s writer, it may have stemmed from a deep desire to set Aym and Baal free. These children had been bound to him since infancy—half a century spent in confinement—and perhaps he simply wanted them to experience the real world at last. Maybe that's why he chose to speak so bluntly, as if to push them forward without clinging. Of course, he had been forced to take them in by Shamura. Nevertheless, he came to see them as family and raised them with the heart of a father for 50 years. Although he may never have been honest about his feelings, deep down he was probably a surprisingly gentle and loving father.🥰 (Below is an enlarged image and the original Korean text)

나린더가 3일 된 애임과 바알을 50년 동안 연옥에서 육아한 게 공식 설정이라는 게 정말 좋은 느낌을 줘요. 하지만 어린 양이 연옥에서 애임과 바알을 데려왔을 때 나린더가 “네 마음대로 해라”고 말하는 부분은 얼핏 보면 무책임하게 느껴질 수도 있죠. 그런데 스토리 작가인 조조는 애임과 바알을 자유롭게 풀어주고 싶다는 나린더의 깊은 마음에서 비롯되었을 수도 있다고 했어요. 아이들이 어린 시절부터 무려 50년간 자신에게 묶여 있었기에 이제는 진정한 세상을 경험하길 바랐던 거겠죠. 그래서 일부러 냉정한 말투로 이별을 고한 게 아닐까 싶어요. 물론 샤무라의 의해 강제로 아이들을 받은셈이지만ㅋㅋㅋㅋ이들을 가족이라 여기며 아버지같은 마음으로 50년동안 길렀을거라 생각하니 큰 감동이 밀려와요. 겉으로는 솔직하지 못해도 의외로 자상한 아버지였을지도 몰라요.🥰

[koreanthroughfiction]

할아버지의 인터넷 정복기 - Grandfather's Internet Conquest Chronicles

"내 손녀가 '시대에 맞���가야 한다'고 했어. 3주가 지난 지금, 200만 명의 십대들이 나를 '홀섬 킹'이라고 부르는데, 둘 중 뭐가 더 모욕적인지 모르겠다."

[My granddaughter said I needed to 'get with the times.' Three weeks later, I'm being called a 'wholesome king' by two million teenagers, and I don't know which part insults me more.]

이 모든 난리는 에밀리가 내 폰에 그 빌어먹을 틱톡이란 걸 깔면서 시작됐다. 그게 "정신을 활발하게 해줄 거"라고 했다. 마치 40년 동안 폭탄 해체하는 일이 내 정신을 충분히 날카롭게 만들어주지 않은 것처럼 말이다. 하지만 그 애가 그런 표정을 지었다 - 할머니가 예전에 짓곤 했던 그 표정 - 그래서 난 고개를 끄덕이고 관심 있는 척했다.

[The whole mess started when Emily installed that damn TikTok thing on my phone. Said it would "keep my mind active." As if forty years of defusing bombs hadn't kept my mind sharp enough. But she had that look—the same one her grandmother used to give me—so I nodded and pretended to care.]

내가 올린 첫 영상은 열리지 않는 피클 병에 욕을 하는 거였다. 녹화되고 있다는 것도 몰랐다. 에밀리가 내가 그 병과 씨름하는 동안 폰을 세워뒀는데, 내 헝클어진 회색 머리는 여느 때처럼 아인슈타인처럼 보였다. "군대에서 30년을 있었는데," 난 그 병을 향해 으르렁거렸다. "네가 날 이길 수 있을 거라 생각해? 난 음식물 분쇄기도 겁먹을 만한 걸 먹어봤다고."

[First video I posted was me cursing at a jar of pickles that wouldn't open. Didn't even know I was being recorded. Emily had propped up my phone while I wrestled with the thing, my wild gray hair doing its usual Einstein impression. "Thirty years in the military," I growled at the jar, "and you think you can outlast me? I've eaten things that would make a garbage disposal nervous."]

결국 그 병이 이겼다. 고무 그립을 써야 했다.

[The jar won. I had to use the rubber grip thing.]

24시간이 지나고 에밀리가 전화해서 내가 바이럴이 됐다고 소리를 질렀다. 난 내가 코로나에 걸린 줄 알았다.

[Twenty-four hours later, Emily called, screaming something about me going viral. I thought I'd caught COVID.]

"아니야, 할아버지! 트렌딩이에요! 조회수가 50만이나 돼요!"

["No, Grandpa! You're trending! Half a million views!"]

알고 보니 사람들은 이 늙은이가 절인 오이와 싸워서 지는 걸 완전 재밌어했다. 댓글엔 "이분 꼭 지켜드려야 해" 랑 "할아버지 에너지 뿜뿜" 같은 말들이 가득했다. 도대체 그게 무슨 뜻인지 알 수가 있나.

[Turns out, people found it hilarious—this angry old coot losing a battle with preserved cucumbers. The comments were full of things like "protect him at all costs" and "grandfather energy intensifies." What in the sam hill does that even mean?]

정신을 차려보니 에밀리는 날 "리액션 비디오"라는 걸 찍게 만들었다. 내가 백플립하는 사람들을 보고 (멍청이들), 요즘 은어를 이해하려 하고 ("노캡"이 거짓말 안 한다는 뜻이라고? "솔직히"라고 하면 될 걸), 에너지 드링크를 리뷰하는 ("배터리를 설탕물에 녹인 맛이군") 영상들이었다.

[Before I knew it, Emily had me doing what she called "reaction videos." Me watching people doing backflips (idiots), trying to understand modern slang ("no cap" means they're not lying? What happened to just saying "honestly"?), and reviewing energy drinks ("Tastes like someone melted a battery in sugar water").]

내 가장 인기 있는 영상? 이 어린 녀석들한테 병원식 모서리로 침대를 제대로 정리하는 법을 가르쳐주는 거였다. "동전을 던졌을 때 튀어 오를 정도가 돼야 해. 그래도 아직 부족해!" 내가 카메라를 향해 고함을 쳤다. "그리고 네 목숨이 걸린 것처럼 그 모서리를 단단히 접어. 언젠가는 진짜 그럴 수도 있으니까!"

[My most popular video? Me teaching these young punks how to properly make a bed with hospital corners. "If you can bounce a quarter off it, it's still not tight enough," I barked at the camera. "And tuck in those corners like your life depends on it, because one day, it might!"]

댓글들이 미쳤다:

[The comments were wild:]

"화가 난 게 아니라 우리 침대 정리 실력이 실망스러우신 거야 😭"

["He's not mad, he's just disappointed in our bed-making skills 😭"]

"2025년에 우리에게 필요했던 에너지다"

["This is the energy we needed in 2025"]

"POV: 너의 할아버지가 몰래 주인공이었음"

["POV: Your grandpa is secretly the main character"]

에밀리가 POV가 무슨 뜻인지 설명하려고 했는데, 난 내 ��가 귀에서 새어나오기 전에 그만하라고 했다.

[Emily tried explaining what POV means, but I told her to stop before my brain started leaking out my ears.]

지난주엔 마트에서 어떤 애가 내 사인을 해달라고 했다. 난 그 애한테 침대를 제대로 정리하는 걸 보여주면 영수증에 사인해주겠다고 했다. 불쌍한 녀석, 마치 내가 다빈치 코드를 해독하라고 한 것처럼 보였다.

[Last week, some kid at the grocery store asked for my autograph. I told him I'd sign his receipt if he showed me he could make his bed properly. Poor kid looked like I'd asked him to decode the Da Vinci Code.]

이제 에밀리는 "수익 창출"이니 "브랜드 딜"이니 하는 얘기를 하고 있다. 어떤 매트리스 회사가 자기네 제품을 홍보해달라고 한다는군. 나한테 말이다! 평생 반은 돌덩이 위에서 자면서 그걸 호화로운 숙소라고 불렀던 바로 그 사람한테.

[Now Emily's talking about "monetization" and "brand deals." Apparently, some mattress company wants me to promote their products. Me! The same guy who spent half his career sleeping on rocks and calling it luxury accommodation.]

진짜 웃긴 건? 내 옛 부대에서 이 소식을 들었다는 거다. 존슨 상사한테 문자가 왔다: "상관님, 죄송하지만, 이제 틱톡 스타가 되셨다고요? 세상이 정말 미쳐가나 봅니다."

[The real kicker? My old unit caught wind of it. Got a text from Johnson, my former sergeant major: "Sir, with all due respect, you're a TikTok star now? The world really has gone to hell."]

난 에밀리가 가르쳐준 그 바보같은 춤을 추는 영상을 보내줬다, 그저 그를 고통스럽게 하려고.

[I sent back a video of me doing that stupid dance Emily taught me, just to watch him suffer.]

아마도 이 "시대에 맞춰가는" 것도 그렇게 나쁘진 않은 것 같다. 하지만 누군가 날 한 번만 더 "베스티"라고 부르면, 인터넷을 통째로 지워버릴 거다. 젠장맞을 인터넷 전체를. 방법은 찾아내겠지.

[Maybe this "getting with the times" thing isn't so bad after all. Though if one more person calls me "bestie," I'm deleting the internet. The whole damn thing. I'm sure I can figure out how.]

적어도 그 피클 병은 이제 유명해졌다. 아직도 안 열린 채로 내 선반에 트로피처럼 놓여있다. 어떤 싸움은 품위 있게 지는 거고, 어떤 싸움은 콘텐츠로 만드는 거다. 에밀리 말로는 그렇��나. 난 그냥 복수라고 부르지만.

[At least the pickle jar is now famous. It sits on my shelf like a trophy, still unopened. Some battles you lose with dignity, and some you turn into content. That's what Emily calls it anyway. I just call it revenge.]

요즘 애들이 뭔가를 알고 있는 것 같다, 비록 침대는 제대로 정리할 줄 모르지만. 하지만 에밀리한텐 내가 이런 말 했다고 하지 마라. 내 명성을 지켜야 하니까.

[The kids these days might be onto something, even if they can't make their beds worth a damn. But don't tell Emily I said that. I've got a reputation to maintain.]

이제 실례하지만, 난 "POV: 군대 할아버지가 너의 게이밍 셋업을 평가한다"라는 걸 찍어야 한다고 한다. 그게 뭔진 모르겠지만. 이 녀석들 케이블 정리가 제대로 안 돼있으면 혼쭐을 내줄 거다.

[Now, if you'll excuse me, apparently I need to film something called a "POV: Military grandpa rates your gaming setup." Whatever that means. These kids better have their cables properly managed, or they're in for an earful.]