#( why are you asking HIM john )

[nemesis-is-my-middle-name]

Arthur, what if...

"Yes?"

What if... I was a worm?

"A—a worm?"

...Yes.

"Well—wait. What sort of worm are you talking about here? Some sort of parasitic worm, or just a, an earthworm, or...?"

I—wh-what? Why would I not be an earthworm?

"I'm just—trying to think about it practically. I mean, I would have to... what, carry a jar of earth around everywhere? Tie it to, to my belt, like we did Yorick...?"

You would... carry me around in a jar of dirt everywhere?

"Well, not if I didn't have to, that's why I'm asking! I mean, if you're really that committed to having a body of your own, but if you ask me, being a worm doesn't sound much better than—"

A-are you—wait, are you arguing in favor of a fucking—tapeworm right now?

"I'm thinking about logistics! You're the one who posed the hypothetical!"

Jesus Christ, Arthur–

[starlightseraph]

brigadier alastair gordon lethbridge-stewart my beloved

[arthur-lesters-right-arm]

Here, i'll help out with the *starting shit*

Do you think if Arthur touches his eyes it gets John off?

Alright Starting Shit is cancelled everyone go home.

[storytellering]

Hope you're watching, boy.

[tsarjozinzbazin]

*SLAMS DEBIT CARD WITH A NEGATIVE BALANCE ON IT* 💥💳💥💳💥💳💥💳💥 MOR COLD LIEUTENANTS PEASE

OKOK SORRY 🙏🙏🙏

this is what they look like to me sorry (Ned is a porcupine)

[deadpoetsandlivinglegends]

Feel like Neil couldn’t have been any other kind of actor than one in theatre. If he was a movie actor or on social media or whatnot, it would not be the same. Theatre by nature is fleeting. Recorded mediums can be rewatched over and over, creating a time loop of sorts. We the audience can keep going back to a time when Neil is still alive. Theatre however is live and once the play is over, there is no going back except in our memories. It is much like life. We are forced to live in the moment in a theater lest we miss it altogether. It’s not that the poets choose to live in a world where Neil is dead, it’s that they must because the only other option is to die themselves. I feel like Keatings teachings could only be reflected in stage theatre because that’s the only way there can be no time loop of grief. I think dead poets society itself isn’t about overcoming the authority in your life to do what you want but rather about grief, about allowing oneself to feel grief and all one’s emotions without letting it consume you and to keep living after, to live every day in the moment lest you fall into grief and regret that will destroy you or force you into a miserable life

[vee-lociraptor]

rat john doe malevolent in the fourth dimension what will he do

inspiration is obvious but for the uninitiated. @james-spooky 's malevatouille which won't get out of my head. also this post by lotte that made me realize i needed to crochet him because i cant draw.

anyway. read malevatouille it's really good. james is plaguing us all with it /pos

[pilfappreciator]

Did another oopsie and accidentally deleted another ask (*bangs head on table*) BUT HOPEFULLY THE LOVELY ANON WHO SENT IT SEES THIS!!

DADZONE & Child! Reader: John Dory

Includes: GN! Reader, Child! Reader, Adopted! Reader, accidental DILF John Dory, slight angst

TW: mention of spiders and body horror near the end (nothing too graphic but just in case)

🥽 This man doesn't trust himself enough not to fuck up another meaningful relationship ://

🥽 Personally, how I see it, becoming a father is probably the last thing on JD's to-do list. I mean he's definitely got the skills (being the oldest of five and having to raise his brothers means he's picked up a few things), and I like to think that it's something he longs for deep down, but considering how BADLY he fumbled with his brothers the last time they were all in the same room...

🥽 So yeah. In theory would be SO down to start a family of his own, but in practice?? He is EXTREMELY hesitant

🥽 THAT BEING SAID!! Chances are he probably found you as an egg

🥽 He was out one day, hiking out in the forest or exploring coastal coves or rock climbing, when all of a sudden he just… stumbles across an egg. Just sitting there in a patch of moss or nestled into a log

🥽 Ends up taking the egg with him back to Ronda, but not before an actual HOUR of confused staring? Distressed pacing back and forth?? Panicked rambling all the while???

🥽 (the fact that Ronda tried to eat the egg upon his return doesn't help at all)

🥽 John Dory spends the next month or so visiting nearby troll villages and asking anyone who crosses his path "Hey man did you drop this? 😬"

🥽 In the end he decides to take you in himself. Partly because he's gotten tired of all the looks other trolls keep giving him for trying to force an egg into their hands, and also because he… may have grown attached to said egg in the past few weeks. I mean by the end of day 3 he'd already given you a name so you know he's screwed ahsjkakaa

🥽 He tells himself he's taking you in because it's what any good citizen would do (He is a lair. He is 100% doing it for himself)

🥽 The day you hatch is LITERALLY one of the best days of his life? Like he's just making himself some dinner and suddenly he hears crackling coming from his hair?? And then there's babbling???

🥽 This man is going about his day with you nestled in his hair (basically the troll equivalent to carrying a baby on your hip lol). He's choppin trees, foraging for food, and driving his armadillo van all while he's got an actual egg sitting on his head. Absolutely talks to you the whole time, too. He has no idea if you can actually hear him but like.. this man spent the last 20 years all alone in the woods, okay, his ass is lonely :((

🥽 Yknow that thing parents do where they hold up headphones to a woman's womb and play Mozart or whatever to make the baby "smarter" or some shit?? Yeah that's JD. He's doing the same thing to his egg

🥽 no Mozart tho ONLY BROZONE 😤😤 HIS BABY HAS GOTTA HAVE GOOD TASTE AND NOTHING LESS

🥽 If he's really feeling himself then he'll sing the songs himself. And then proceed to give unprompted lore behind the lyrics and the songs "true meaning" (songs include Brozone classics such as Baby Boy Got My Heart In A Headlock Boy and Baby Baby Love You Like A Pizza But Hate You Like There's Pineapple On It Babe)

🥽 "holy crap YOU'RE SO SMALL—"

🥽 UGLY CRYING HOLDING YOU IN THE CROOK OF HIS ARM CARESSING YOUR SOFT LITTLE FACE WITH HIS FINGER

🥽 Will die if you reach for him with your tiny baby hands or just smile up at him

🥽 He's still gonna carry you around in his hair while he goes about his day and stuff ngl. Like for him, it's a signature of your guys' bond and you bet your ass he's gonna be milking it for as long as he can (definitely dreads the day you become too big/old for it)

🥽 Most definitely tries to teach you survival skills as soon as possible. He's teaching you how to fish, he's demonstrating how to start a fire with the bare essentials, he's letting you DRIVE RONDA—

🥽 "It's an important skill to have, champ, trust me!"

"...but I'm only five."

"Never too early for a learner's permit!"

🥽 Defnitely tries to reel in that controlling/perfectionist mindset of his, at least for your sake. The last thing he wants is a repeat of what went down with his brothers. As a result he's probably more lenient when you get into trouble or do something wrong

🥽 Fr tho like... you'll accidentally(?) cause an explosion and his ass will be standing, hands on his hips like "I'm not mad, just disappointed 🤨"

🥽 You thought you were getting spoon fed Brozone content as an egg?? Well congrats on being born cuz now you're getting served Brozone content for BREAKFAST 👏 DINNER 👏 AND 👏 LUNCH

🥽 JDs most definitely the type of guy to break into song whenever he's doing the most mundane of tasks (laundry, cooking, cleaning, etc), and yes he fully expects you to join in and know all the lyrics helloooo?? You've basically been raised on Brozone songs at this point like cmon, don't leave him hanging!

🥽 FR THO!! If you grow up to be a Brozone stan, he's never gonna be more proud of himself <33

🥽 This man definitely has a physical collection of every song/album/cover his band has ever done (I'm mean this is the same guy who kept his brothers underwear in a frame for 20 years so ://). He treats every CD, record, cassette tape, etc. like the priceless artifacts they are and YES, HES GONNA PASS THEM ONTO YOU LIKE THEYR FAMILIY HEIRLOOMS DID YOU EXPECT ANY LESS

🥽 If you grow up to lean more towards a different genre of music or Brozone just doesn't end up being your cup of tea... JDs gonna be a lil devastating ngl

🥽 Pls assure him that he has not failed as a father

🥽 Jokes aside tho! I feel like despite his wounded ego, JD will at least TRY to see your point of view. I mean he's definitely gonna be a bit of a grandpa about it—

*while the two of you are listening to your favorite song*

"I mean, I GUESS it's okay... not nearly as lyrically genius as Brozone's hit single: Baby Girl Ur Sweet Like A Milkshake Girl But I'm Lactose Intolerant Baby 🙄"

"Dad. Please shut up."

—but rest assured that he WILL support you and your music taste <33

🥽 You want merch of your favorite band/artist? No worries he's (stealing it right off the shelf) got money to pay for it! Is there a new album about to drop? He's (breaking into a store in the middle of night like a rabid racoon) patiently waiting in line just to buy it for you! You wanna go to a concert? He's using Ronda to (break speed limits, run people over, disobey every known traffic rule) get good parking at the venue!!

🥽 SPEAKING OF CONCERTS!! I feel like he'd be able to offer solid advice on the do's and don'ts of attending a concert. Like... my guy was in a popular band back in the day and he knows first hand how outta hand concerts can get. He has SEEN some shit ajskskaka

🥽 JD definitely has a photo album full of pictures from back in the day. Some of them are snapshots of him and the rest of Brozone, but a majority of the pictures are just of him and his family— away from the stage and cameras. Just him and his brothers and grandma Rosiepuff too...

🥽 He remembers the exact moment every picture was taken, and he'll tell you every bit of context. Birthday, pranks gone wrong, holidays, first day of school— there's a snapshot for just about every milestone. All you have to do is ask and JD is more than happy to relay every childhood anecdote he can remember

🥽 It gets to the point where you eventually know just about everything about your uncles... WHO YOU HAVE NEVER EVEN MET YET AKSKSKAKAK

🥽 It's definitely something that freaks them out once you finally DO meet them

🥽 Like you'll have a conversation with Clay and they'll be like "yeah I'm not a big fan of spiders haha" and you just go "Oh that makes sense considering you used to have vivid nightmares about them crawling under your skin and tickling you to death" and Clay's just like "how the fuck did you know that????"

🥽 "Dude stop telling your kid everything about us"

"I haven't seen you guys in 20 years! I just wanted them to feel close to their uncles ;(("

"THEY DONT NEED TO KNOW ABOUT HOW I USED TO PICK MY NOSE WHEN I WAS SEVEN"

🥽 John Dory, Older Brother Who Overshares About His Younger Siblings my beloved <33

Ermmm yeahhhh this was originally gonna be one big post including ALL the brothers... but then I started writing for JD and got carries away... so yeah this ask is gonna have to be a multi-parter AJSJSJAKKA SORRY ANON I COULDN'T HELP MYSELF 🤥

NEXT PARTS ARE IN THE WORKS!!

Bruce | Clay | Floyd | Branch

[reinacandle8]

Listen, if Wilbur can travel safely through the Black and White without a suit than I choose to believe with Webby’s help, John can too.

[us-agent-atyourservice]

I could literally break him in two.

[ryssbelle]

Spiderman and Clay bffs for life

Based on the stickers I have on my wall, Clay is a new edition to my spiderman wall lmao

[soft-pine]

this is some really personal shit that has to do with how i analyze and interpret john.

when i was a child, my father dragged me around the country from motel to motel talking about how he lost my mother and his single-minded focus on getting her back. i was his best friend. i was his only confidant. i wanted him to be happy all the time. i felt responsible for when he was sad - both with whatever the current situation was and in all the sad moments of his long sad life. when i wasn't with him, sometimes he would go for weeks without calling and i would miss him and think i did something wrong and then sometimes he would tell me what that wrong thing was and i would try to do better. i sat patiently and quietly on the couch in his strange friend's dark house filled with fishing gear while they talked and talked and talked about the ways the world had screwed them over. i never knew where we were driving to. sometimes i would sleep in the car for hours and we still hadn't gotten there. he wanted me to show him a terrifying and confounding amount of respect. he would cry and i would kneel on the couch next to him and try to envelope his whole body into my arms in a hug. i loved him ferociously and protectively. he wanted my singular loyalty and got it. it's so hard to even summarize it all. each moment is just so full of ...

he hurt my feelings and i loved him. i got mad at him and i loved him. he got mad at me and i loved him. i felt deeply sorry for him and i loved him.

and when i watched supernatural oh boy let me tell you.....

and i know it's not chic or whatever to compare john to your dad. I KNOW THAT. but not to garishly bear my open bloody heart on the internet. it's just. i watched this fucking show and i was like... i know him. like. i know that man.

and i'm kinda screwed because we all are analyzing things from our own experiences so when i'm interpreting all the little clues left about john throughout the show, it all feels so familiar. and i don't actually have a way to separate my experience as a child with that kind of father from the way i'm analyzing and watching spn. and so i'm stuck saying, well john just is really similar to my dad. and, yeah, of course there are differences. but i guess all i can do is commit to bringing as much nuance and care to any and all creative endeavors or analysis as half a lifetime of therapy has taught me...

[chickadeethoughts]

look all im saying is i know my friend group of insane gay people and when someone starts making "omg everyone thinks we're dating it's crazyyyyy" jokes about someone 9 times out of 10 it's them soft launching the suggestion so anyway i've been rewatching get back

[liesmyth]

would you be able to give examples/explain more about how race only impacts gideon in the tlt-universe? not being facetious or condescending, genuinely asking. thank you!

Hi anon! If you mean my tags to this post, I wrote

#earth conception of race doesn't impact any character in the series except the canonically brown main antagonist

By which I mean my Worstie and main antagonist of the series, John Gaius (PhD).

I don’t think TLT as a series engages with race in any especially meaningful ways. It’s set in a post-Earth society with entirely different social norms, and there’s no concept of race and ethnicity within the population of the Nine Houses. Physical descriptions of the characters are scarce to say the least, and they rarely spell out the kind of features that suggest specific racial connotations, because the POV characters don’t seem to think it’s something worth remarking upon. iirc, it takes until halfway through HtN for the narrative to confirm that Harrow has brown skin.

[See also Tamsyn’s GtN characters description post. It quotes passages from the book, and you can see how minimal the descriptions are, and she repeats several times that her characters’ appearances are up to the readers’ interpretations. It just doesn’t seem to be a big concern of hers]

Then there’s John, who grew up in twenty-first-century New Zealand and IS explicitly Māori in a way that absolutely impacted his character arc. It's not A major theme of his Nona chapters, but it’s there if you read between the lines. The boarding school he went to, which IRL had a high percentage of low-income Māori students on scholarship. The depth of his climate anxiety, his uncompromising “Nobody left behind” stance before the cryo project was halted, and his fervent hatred of ‘the trillionaires’ afterwards... these are all informed to some extent by his background as an indigenous man imo, and so was the global reaction to his developing powers. The “We were going to put you fellas in jail, weren’t we?” the way his initial attempts at publications are all flat-out ignored by the scientific community and dismissed as culty gimmicky faith healing until he leans into it.

John being Māori is just one of the many pieces of his backstory, and far from the most impactful to what eventually went down, but my point remains that he is the ONLY character in TLT whose racial background 1) affects his story arc and 2) is relatable to the audience. Everyone else is ten thousand years removed from Earth, and I’m just not very interested in using racial identifiers when exploring these characters and their dynamics, because the characters themselves don’t care and neither does the narrative.

[caffeiiine]

haiii soda tell me bout those robloxes you've been into lately!!

HI BASIL!!!!!! okaaay firstly you can blame my friend for dragging me and my other friend into roblox Forsaken roughly 3 weeks ago. My brain has not been the same since. Super long post. I am very invested in this game and its lore.

OKAY!!! So basically the game itself: i dont know if youve ever played roblox, lucky ive been playing since 2017!!!!!! So pretty much its like a typical 'survive the killer' [where you run around one {usually poorly made} map until you get killed or bored. There's no official rounds in these games as they're minimally scripted.] but scripted a lot better, organized into 3-6 minute rounds, and have premade characters to play as–each with different skills and roles. Additionally, some rounds if you collect enough 'malice' you can be the killer and hunt down the rest of the players. Every round you'll either play as a character, or a killer.

The characters themselves are nearly all OCs, or real roblox accounts reimagined as OCs–like C00lkidd or 007n7 for example. Other characters pull from previously popular media or robloxian stereotypes for lack of a better word–like Noob [the little yellow, blue, and green guy usually used to depict the average player], Guest 1337 [via The Last Guest on youtube, a roblox animation movie made by ObliviousHD], and Jason Voorhees [via the Friday the 13th movies. Note: he's obviously not originally from roblox, but he does have a place as being a common killer in the poorly made 'survive the killer' games on the platform, hence his place in game as a playable killer].

Basic lore to the game is as follows: Forsaken is a sort of prison realm ran by the Spectre. They're a god of sorts–atleast I think. I don't think much canon has come out about them as a character, especially because they're unplayable, so I'm not sure about much of their lore stuff. Anyway! The Spectre brings down survivors and killers alike to play matches against each other for presumably their own amusement.

So from here on out I'll be differentiating between characters by referring to playable killers as killers, and playable characters as survivors.

So first off! Killers, admittedly with them is not really where the majority of my attention is focused so this section will be sparse. There are 4 right now, with a 5th about to come out.

Firstly Jason, as he's called in the game, basically is Jason Voorhees from the same movies. His inclusion comes from his place in the 'survive the killer ---' games as I've explained before. His playstyle is best suited for close quarters combat since he doesn't have any ranged attacks, which also makes him best suited for beginners. He's also one of my favorite killers as well as the one I usually play as. <3

Second, there's C00lKidd. He comes from an account of the same name which was just an alt of 007n7. Pretty much he'd go into games like Work at a Pizza Place [Dued1] and Natural Disaster Survival [Stickmasterluke] and exploit with his C00lGui, mess around, play music, etc. There was one time he–or maybe a copycat account now that I think about it–exploited in a game I was in and stuck the image of his avatar everywhere back in June 2018. He has ranged attacks as well as close quarters melee so hes pretty easy-ish to use, I think he has a 3 star difficulty rating? His lore goes like: he's the adopted child of 007n7, found on a doorstep, the usual. He and his father would usually go to places like Builder Brother's Pizza [the official name of the pizza place in Work at a Pizza Place], and mess around with the C00lGui that 007n7 built. They got banned from the place after awhile, and a little ways after that C00lKidd went missing. I think nows a good time to mention that he's canonically 9 or 10, even in the Forsaken realm. It's heavily implied that he died and then was brought down to Forsaken by the Spectre, but nothing is confirmed as far as I know. Usually if you search Forsaken, he or 007n7 will be the first ones you see. On that note, if 007n7 is the last survivor alive during a match, a custom Last Man Standing theme will play: "Plead".

Anyway, back to March 18th, 2017. It was rumored that the John Doe account–an old test account for roblox–would hack everyone and basically wreck the game. Of course, March 18th came to pass with no incident. He was a pretty old urban legend. His playstyle is largely trap based where he can bring up spikes to trap/damage players and set up spots that slow you down and deal damage if you step in them. Other than that, he's able to slash survivors, surprisingly not using his larger arm I just realized. His lore is from my understanding, he got corrupted by old dysfunctional code, forgot his wife, and started killing. I'm not too sure. His wife, Jane Doe is set to be added to the game as a survivor at some point, not much is known past that.

Next up, we have 1x1x1x1, or 1x4 for short. I'll just be calling them by 1x since I cannot be bothered to use all that. In short, they were manifested from Shedletsky's hatred, as in Forsaken lore, and are now devoted to killing him over and over and over again. It's unknown how they were Forsakened. Their origin comes from back when Shedletsky, as in one of the original Roblox admins, used to make backstories for Roblox. 1x's backstory was that he came from the fourth dimension and hated Roblox for being 3D then vowed to destroy it. The account was later taken over by hackers before being deactivated by Roblox. Their playstyle has a lot of faith in the player's ability to finish off kills, as they're very reliant on ranged stun attacks. They're also the slowest killer in the game. Also fun fact! If the last player alive in a match is Shedletsky, then a custom LMS theme will play, "Creation of Hatred".

Then, Noli. He's an upcoming killer whom everyone is very excited for, myself included. He is currently in testing stages!!!!! Not a ton is known about him, nor do I know much about his origin. I think it's an old myth from 2010 about a hacker by the name of Noli? The account has since been deactivated so, not much there. According to what's known, in Forsaken lore he was a previous friend of 007n7 prior to his adoption of C00lkidd. Apparently 007n7 pressured him into taking the Void Star, which is rumored to be what's controlling him in Forsaken alongside the Spectre. For some reason it's not on his model, so I'm not really sure what's going on with that. His playstyle looks like it'll be similar to John Doe?? Probably trap based, but I'm unsure. I really like his voice lines, they do something to my brain.

Finally!!! Azure. ohh Azure. Azure my beloved. OKAY!!! I'm sure you've seen me obsessively post about Azuretime, so this is Azure from Azuretime. Azure is not released right now, nor is he set to release any time soon. Either way I am insanely excited for whenever they release. They were the partner of Two Time within the Spawn cult, where they both resided prior to being Forsakened. Since there's so much stuff already, I'll keep this short as I can. Two Time is implied to be mentally ill as well as have religious delusions exacerbated by the cult they're in. This build up of circumstances led them to sacrifice Azure to the Spawn in order to attain their second life [something that the cult strived for]. We actually do have canon confirmation how Azure got Forsakened!!!! So after he was sacrificed, the Spectre appeared to him in death, taking the form of the Spawn and pretty much guiding them down to the realm of Forsaken. In Forsaken, his mouth is zipped and apparently his hat speaks for him [the hat is implied to be a subset of the Spectre, if i remember correctly, it also controls his thoughts]. Although the hat claims otherwise, Azure as a person without the influence wants Two Time back in their life. He does hold a bit of disdain and betrayal for the sacrifice, but the hat exacerbates that a lot.

[uwu-scraptrappy]

Furrys your saw because why the fuck not

A lot of these were suggestions on Reddit by people with much bigger brains than me that had the most correct takes on everything

Reasonings down below:

John: Cross orb weaver. Spiders are known for their beautiful webs used to trap their prey, which fit John because his whole deal is making elaborate traps. I chose a cross orb weaver specifically because orb weavers have some of the most beautiful webs I've ever seen and religious symbolism goes hard.

Diego: Pallid Bat. Okay I didn't really have a specific reason for him, a bat just fits him in a way I can't describe. It just goes hard tbh

Adam: Opossum. It just made sense, that guy is so possum. Also I may be leaning into the Adam is alive theory, but opossums are really good at playing dead.

Hoffman: Orca. Orcas are big, bulky pack animals, which not only fits him design wise, but plays into his fall from grace stemming from the death of his sister.

Billy: Piglet. Billy is, essentially, the mascot of the apprentices. He's like the VTuber model. And pigs are a whole thing in Saw lore, so why not merge the two?

Logan: Fox. I wanted to make both Logan and Lawrence canines, since I planned for Jill to be a canine and something something blond doctors. Anyways I chose a fox in particular since foxes are often depicted as tricksters and deceitful, and Jigsaw was, essentially, about deceiving the police and tricking them into believing it was Halloran that was Jigsaw.

Michael: English spot rabbit. Buny.

Zep: Hyena. Have you EVER seen a MF that looked more like a hyena? Yeah, didn't think so.

Amanda: Maine Coon. I feel like she's very feline coded in general, and Maine Coon cats are usually loners just as Amanda is. Cats are also stereotyped to be mean and feisty animals, and guess what Amanda is?

Lynn: Vampire deer. Wouldn't it be funny if all the Denlons were deer because their son got run over. Jokes aside this design unironically goes kinda hard and I like it.