#(it's ignorance posing as a documentary yet again)

[ofstarsandvibranium]

A Day in the Life...

Fandom: Marvel (Actor AU)

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x GN!Reader

Summary: You're hired to be famous actor, Bucky Barnes' social media manager. This is probably the best and worst job you've ever gotten because Bucky gives you free reign of his social media but also...you may or may not be crushing on Bucky aka your boss. Based off my imagine here.

A/N: this is 3,180 words because i refused to break it up into parts. anyway, ENJOY!

You press record and begin to narrate, "A Day in the Life of a Social Media Manager for a Super Big and Popular Actor *Working Title*"

You face the camera to you and continue to speak, "Bucky had some morning meetings but I wasn't allowed to film. So now here he is doing his daily workout."

You pan the camera to him and he says, "Hi," with a shy smile.

You snort, stopping the recording, "What?"

"This is..." he gestures to you and your work phone, "awkward."

"Then don't make it awkward! And hey, you said I had free reign! I asked your followers what they'd like to see and they say they want a glimpse of your daily life."

His brows furrow, "Didn't you just say this is a day in the life of a social media manager?"

You shrug, "The poll was tied to seeing your daily life and my daily life working for you. So I just decided to put the two together. Anyway, the title is a work in progress. We'll see how this does and go from there. Anyway, just ignore me. I'm not even here."

Bucky gets back to his work out. He has an outdoor and indoor set up. Because the weather was nice, he decided to do his workout outside...shirtless.

He goes to the lifting station, picking up some weights. You begin to narrate again, but this time in a Steve Irwin impression, "Right. Now watch as the esteemed actor gets ready to work out his arms in preparation for an awesome movie that I'm not allowed to mention."

Bucky lets out a chuckle, dropping the weights and looking back at you, "You filming a nature documentary now?" he rests his hands on his hips and smirks at you in a way that makes you want to melt.

You give a playful yet dramatic sigh, dropping your filming arm down, "Are you this difficult with your directors, Barnes?"

He shakes his head, "Nah. None of my directors have been as dorky as you."

You stick your tongue out at him, "Fine. I'll leave you to your workout."

"No, hey, I was joking! Don't leave me!"

You shake your head, "It's fine, Bucky. I'll leave you to it. I'll chalk up some other videos we could do. Also, the getty images from last night's premiere are up. Did you want to look through them before I post?"

He shakes his head, "I trust your judgement." he turns around, his bare back facing you. You stay and watch as he do a few arm curls and immediately rush back into his home.

"Get it together, Y/N," you mumble to yourself, leaving your boss to his workout.

________________________

During Bucky's fitting for New York's Fashion Week, you were allowed to take some behind the scenes pictures. You have a few candid ones of Bucky standing in front of a mirror, his stylist fixing his collar, and him looking at the different shoe options.

Then you included some goofy ones where he copies a pose of a mannequin, a selfie of you two showing of your shoe choices (his being very fancy and yours being your regular sneakers), and then a selfie of him wearing a pair of sunglasses without a lens.

You posted all of them after fashion week was over and his Instagram followers were LOVING it.

bbarnesfan: STAHP. he's so adorable.

xbucky-muncher: he went from serious to dork. get you a man who can do both.

notyouraveragebuckyfan: ok but him and his social media manager are so cute together???

bbarnesfan replies: they're literally bucky's employee. don't be weird.

notyouraveragebuckyfan replies: i'm just saying! they seem like they have great chemistry! have you seen the tiktoks and reels of them together?

"How come you put the candids and the selfies all in one post?" Bucky asks as he looks through the latest post you made.

You're scrolling through the analytics of the last tiktok you two made, one where he guesses if one of his characters said a specific line or it's made up.

You take note of the demographics, the comments, etc. to be mindful of for the next posts you make.

Without looking up from your laptop, you answer, "It shows people the different sides of you. How you take things seriously but you can also have fun with it."

He hums, "Lots of people think we look cute together." He says this in hopes of getting some sort of reaction from you.

You continue to work, not looking back at them, "Don't pay attention to those comments. The internet will make up all kinds of stuff."

Bucky's shoulders sag a bit as he replies, "Yeah. You're right."

You'd been working for him for almost a year now. He doesn't see you every day like he did when you first were hired on. Now you only come over twice a week to go over analytics with his team and to shoot some content. Most of the time, you work from your place and Bucky's been feeling more lonely ever since.

Your presence brightened his day and you provided a breath of fresh air on his busier days. He genuinely enjoyed your company and liked making content with you. He liked learning more about you, having meals together, and just being with you. He thought that maybe there was something there between you, but then he'd be reminded that you're his employee and he's your boss. It can't work out.

But there were some glimpsed of hope. You'd look at Bucky a certain way or make a comment that seemed a little more flirty. It had to mean something, right? But whenever Bucky tried to push a little more, you'd pull away and he hated it. It was so complicated.

He wanted you as more than an employee but his team clocked him on his feelings and told him not to fuck it up because you've helped Bucky's image immensely.

He can't fuck this up, not matter how much his heart yearns for more.

___________________________

"Hello, hello!" you greet Bucky, handing him his coffee as he lets you into his home. You've been working for him for over a year. It's one out of the two days you come over to do work with him.

His stylist, Michael, was nice enough to bring some clothes over for a TikTok video that you had which was "My Social Media Manager Picks Out My Next Event Outfit".

The next event that Bucky needs to make an appearance in is his friend, Nat's, movie premiere. The dress code is very formal so it's no surprise to see various kinds of formal wear.

What does surprise you is that you see a rack of clothes that you know wouldn't be for Bucky.

"Um...what's this?"

He grins widely at you, "Clothes for you to choose from."

Your brows shoot up in surprise, "Excuse me?"

"You said you've always wanted to go to one right? You're coming with me."

"As your social media manager?"

"You're not working the event. You're going as my plus one."

"Uuuuhhh..."

"You don't have to, but I was hoping to bring you as, ya know, a thank you for all the amazing work you've done for me this past year."

You can't help but snort, "Bucky, c'mon, did all of your usuals reject you or something?"

"You're the only person I've asked right now. Come on, Y/N, please?"

You want to. You really, really want to. But these past few months, you and Bucky have been toeing the line between a work relationship and something more. You're not sure if going as his plus one to the premiere is a good idea, especially since even more people have been commenting on your chemistry.

But Bucky's looking at you with those gorgeous blue eyes and he's pouting and he looks so cute, so how could you say no?

"I'll think about it," you reply and it seems to appease Bucky because he smiles again and says, "Okay. But I really do hope you'll go. It'll be fun, plus you've met Nat. She thinks you're cool."

You scoff, "There's no way Natasha Romanoff, the hottest and most popular actress right now, thinks I'm cool."

He shrugs, "Everyone thinks you're cool. It's hard to not like you, Y/N, trust me," he gives you a wink and it makes your cheeks warm up, "Anyway, so let's see what we got."

You wordlessly nod, going over to set up your work phone to begin filming.

________________________

You think you did really well with picking out Bucky's outfit. It was a royal blue velvet jacket with a black bow tie, and black slacks. Even Michael was impressed with your choice.

Even though you weren't working tonight, you still took some pictures and clips just in case. You took a video of the reveal of your look tonight and can't help but feel bubbly inside when Bucky wouldn't stop looking at you.

To distract yourself, you decided to take candids of Bucky getting his hair done after you were finished getting ready. He kept making funny faces at you, making you laugh.

After you both were ready, you took some mirror selfies, obviously, and sent them to Bucky afterwards.

You're in the car on the way to the premiere when you get a bunch of texts and notifications from people:

Wanda: I KNOW YOU SAID YOU WERE GOING TO THE PREMIERE BUT YOU DIDN'T SAY AS BUCKY'S DATE!

Pietro: good luck tonight! use protection! ;D

Carol: since when are you dating bucky barnes???

You unlock your phone but see a notification that Bucky tagged you in a post you didn't know he was going to make.

It was the mirror selfies you two took, with the caption: got the most gorgeous date on my arm tonight.

You immediately turn to Bucky, eyes narrowing, "James Buchanan Barnes."

"...I don't like how you just used my government name like that."

"Why would you post those selfies of us?!"

He shrugs, "Because we look great."

"And the caption?"

"It's true. You're gorgeous."

You groan and pinch the bridge of your nose, "Your publicist and manager are gonna kill me."

"No, they won't."

"They hired me to make sure your online presence is good and won't jeopardize your career."

"Nothing's gonna happen, Y/N."

"People already assume we're together because of how well we work together. It was fine to let them speculate because but that post will make things even worse."

"How?"

"People will think I'm a gold digger? That I got this job because we're sleeping together? I don't know! The internet makes up all kinds of fucked up reasons and I won't be able to get work ever again!"

"But is it so bad that people think we're together?"

"For you, it won't be bad. For me, it could be. So, please, Bucky, delete those photos before even more people see it."

Bucky's jaw clenches and mumbles out, "Fine. I'm sorry," he takes out his phone and you watch as he deletes the photos off his instagram. Tonight was supposed to be fun, but you're sure you just ruined it.

____________________

The entire night was awkward. Bucky did his best to still include you in conversations he had with friends and colleagues, but you felt the tension between you two. You did your best to enjoy it as much as you can. You saw Nat for a brief moment where you hugged her and congratulate her. She said she wanted to chat later but you didn't really expect much. This is her premiere and she has other priorities.

She proved you wrong, however, during the after party where she pulled you to an area for more privacy.

"Hey, how are you?"

"Um, good. A little overwhelmed, but, uh, tonight's been...fun."

She tilts her head and narrows her eyes at you, just like her character did in the movie, and you can't help but let the truth spill, "I freaked out on Bucky on the way here. He posted pictures of us that insinuate we're together and I don't want it to result in me getting fired and potentially never getting a job like this ever again."

"Yeah, I saw that before he deleted it. You guys looked cute. Also, are you two not dating?"

"What? No! He's literally my boss!"

She shrugs, "Could've fooled me. Anyway, there's something clearly going on between you two, right?"

"I, uh, I don't know what to say. Do I have feelings for him? Yes. But will I act on them? No. Again, he's my boss, I'm his employee. I really like this job too, so I can't risk anything."

"I feel like there's a 'but' coming."

"...but he's so amazingly funny, smart, hot, understanding, compassionate, and I just love spending time with him. It's so fucked, Nat.

She nods in understanding, "I know, hon. I'm gonna say the most cliche thing ever, but listen to your heart. I'm sure you'll find another job just as fun as this one, but to be with someone you click so well with? That doesn't come often."

"Hey, you okay?" Bucky comes up from behind, placing a hand on your hip and looking at you with concern.

Nat flashes him a smile, "Just wanted to catch up with them, but I've hogged up your date long enough, Barnes." she turns back to you, "Think about what I said, okay? Enjoy the rest of your night and thanks for coming," she hugs you and heads back out to the party.

Bucky nods to her and stands in front of you, "Did you want to stay longer or are you ready to go?"

"I think I'm ready to go for the night."

"Alright." you follow him out to the front where you wait for the driver to pick you guys up. He stands beside you with his hands in his pockets, wearing that gorgeous outfit you chose.

"I'm sorry again about the pictures."

"Thank you, I'm sorry I attacked you like that."

He shakes his head, "Don't be. I get why you did. But, um, we're good?"

You nod, "Yeah, Bucky, we're good."

"Good," he gives you a shy smile and then points at the upcoming car, "Our ride's here." As soon as the SUV pulls up, he opens the door for you and lets you go in first. He follows and the drive home is in silence.

_________________________

You're working in your little alcove at Bucky's when he approaches you, "Hey, I need to talk to you about something."

You turn in your chair and look up at him, "This doesn't sound good."

"It's good and bad."

"Um, okay?" you clasp your hands together in your lap in anxiousness.

"So...I'm hiring a different social media manager."

Your heart drops, "Wh-What? But-But I thought I was doing well. Your team said I was doing a good job. What happened?"

"You are, but lemme also add that there's another job already waiting for you."

"Bucky, I'm so confused right now. Are you firing me? Or contracting me to someone else?"

"I'm firing you because I can't date an employee."

You straighten up at his statement, "Excuse me?"

Bucky steps closer to you, reaching out and grabbing your hand, "It's just...shit, Y/N, you gotta know how I feel about you right?"

You bite your lip in nervousness, "Maybe."

He lets out a long sigh and run a hand through his cropped hair, "Listen, I like you. A lot. That's the real reason I wanted you to come with me to the premiere. I love spending time with you and I've been so much happier since you've started working for me. To be honest, I didn't know how much longer I could keep myself from wanting to be with you. So to still make sure your professionalism was in tact, I reached out to Nat to see if she was in need of an amazing social media manager and, luckily, she was."

"I'm gonna work for Nat? Nat wants me to work for her?"

Bucky nods, "She does. So you'll be working for her which means I'm not longer your boss. Which means...will you go on a date with me?"

Fuck it. Fuck it all. You held in your feelings for Bucky for so long and now you've been given a loophole to be with him.

"I like you too, Bucky. So much, I didn't say anything, obviously, because I wanted to remain professional, but fuck did you make it hard to not fall for you."

Bucky snickers with a smirk, "I can say the same thing about you." His thumb caresses the back of your hand and it feels so right.

"Have you actually hired someone to take over for me?"

"Not officially, but I have some applicants already. Why? Do you know someone?"

You nod, "I do. She just graduated college with a degree in communications with a concentration in social media. I can have her send in an application, but I one hundred percent vouch for her. She's done great work."

"Alright. I trust you, but I don't think I can find anyone who works as well as you do."

"I fucking hope not. Or else you might leave me for them!"

"Never," Bucky replies confidently with a softness in his voice and adoration in his eyes.

"So...about that date..."

_______________________

"Come with me to work for a popular actor!" Kamala narrates her latest TikTok.

"So Bucky is working on a new movie with Natasha Romanoff so for promo we're filming a bunch of different content!" Nat and Bucky wave at the camera.

"After filming all of that, they're off to a photoshoot. Here are some of the potential outfits they can wear." the camera pans to several racks of clothing.

"There's a lunch break and here's my lunch versus Bucky's lunch," Kamala's plate is pasta while Bucky's roast chicken, "The boss needs to bulk up for another role so he needs a lot of protein."

"And that's all that I can show you for today. Until next time, bye!"

You scroll to the comments and they're immediately flooded with"

you're not y/n???

wait, did y/n quit?! did bucky fire them?! no!

what happened to y/n?!

and so on.

You snort and show Bucky, who was cuddling you from behind, "I told you people would notice."

He peers over your shoulder to look at your phone, "Kamala actually had an idea for that."

_________________

"A Day in the Life of an Actor's Social Media Manager. Part...whatever. So we're doing more promo stuff for Bucky and Nat's new movie. But this time I'm also working with Nat's social media manager, Y/N! We're doing a What's in the Box Challenge and here's a clip of Bucky freaking out."

"IT'S MOVING! WHY IS IT MOVING?!"

"Also look at Bucky and Y/N. They're so cute together. And yes, guys, they're totally dating now which is why Y/N no longer works for Bucky. ANYWAY..."

[tojisun]

https://www.tumblr.com/tojisun/738535284282638336/a-tentative-hc-of-bimboreaders-insta-acc bimboReader is a penguin lover?! I can picture her calling ‘Simmy’ in tears when she learns that penguins give pebbles as courting gifts 🥰

she is into penguins!! it’s her current fixation, on top of butterfly migration cycles (and selfcare routines – this one is sups important because it’s also meant to give simon a moment of reprieve; just the two of them enjoying a quiet relaxing skincare sesh <33)!! and ahshdhe this made me giggle sm oh this is so adorable and silly, i fear!!!

bimbo!reader mlist <3 // divider by @/plutism ^3^

simon’s focus is splintered at the first chimes of his phone, the sound ringing within the small war room and taking the attention of his squad. his captain trails off into silence, shooting a bewildered look towards simon – it’s not like simon can blame him, after all, this might be the first time he’s actually brought his phone with him during a briefing.

“what…” johnny murmurs but simon ignores him, still planting his focus to his CO as he tilts his head in silent question. john sighs before shooting simon a short nod, giving him his permission. simon turns to leave before john’s even done nodding, his quiet footsteps drowned out by the sound of john dismissing them for the day.

simon doesn’t even need to guess who’s calling him, after all, it’s only your number he’s saved in his work phone. it’s only you who can reach him when he’s out of the city. usually, though, you wouldn’t call him at this time, choosing, instead, to send series of texts about your day or sending over pictures of mittens or anything that could have caught your fancy. so receiving a call from you worries him, the ball of anxiety in his stomach ever-so expanding until he’s all choked up.

he’s barely made it to his room when simon accepts your call, your name falling from his lips with a breathless whisper.

the answering sniffle on your end does nothing to calm him down, the worry simmering underneath his veins spiking up higher. lashing out angrier.

“shh, sweetpea,” simon murmurs, hoping he could do more than just to comfort you over a call. “c’mon, lovie. talk to me, yeah? tell me how i can help.”

“oh, it’s just,” you mumble wetly. “pebbles.”

“…pebbles?”

“mhmm,” he hears you say. “simmy, penguins give out pebbles or rocks as courting gifts!” he hears you sniffle again. “history channel said so.”

“animal planet, sweets,” simon replies automatically before he pauses, blinking.

oh.

“oh, love,” simon wheezes out, the breath coming back to him, feeling his body finally uncoil from the tension that he was carrying. he sags down to his bed and presses the back of his palm on his temple as a chuckle rasps out from his lips. “but y’r doin’ alright?”

“hmm? oh, yes,” you say, sounding less heartbroken and simon wonders if it was because your attention’s been snagged, once again, by the animal planet channel – simon could hear the familiar british narrator droning on in the background.

simon lets out a fond chuckle. “‘lright then.” he licks the back of his teeth. “tell me more about their courting style?”

he hears you gasp before a rapid fire of information is chirped to his ears, the beautiful drawl of your voice chasing away the last remnants of the worry that had choked him up.

you tell him how the documentary was upfront in saying that scientific explanation for the phenomena has yet to be fully explored, so the documentary had honoured, instead, the longstanding theory of female penguins accepting rocks as courting gifts because it shows that the male penguin knows how he can take care of their eggs. “rocks keep the eggs and their nests afloat!”

simon hums and ohh’s and ahh’s at the appropriate times, posing questions that steered the conversation to the right track when you began to mumble distractedly. simon listens in earnest because he may not really care much about penguins but he cares a lot about you. he cares about learning your interests; cares about cultivating his own because whatever his girl wants, simon promises he will learn for her.

and with the way your voice lilts in joy, well, simon knows he’s done the right thing.

(simon returns from their mission with two rocks in his person – one is a polished pebble which he painstakingly looked for when he went down to the beach. the squad insisted on coming with him although the fuckers were not of any help – not like he would’ve accepted it anyway – as they chose to just sit by the local ice cream shop and watched as simon prowled towards the shore in the middle of winter; the one he found was a beautiful hazel colour, mixed greens and browns and even a touch of blues making up the surface of the rock.

the second one he brought with him was a diamond ring.)

this is so silly i love them bad :((

tagging: @honestlyhiswife @ghostsbimbo @kenz-ee @ivymarquis @yannauauau @yaebaal @liwooa @kariiiel @loonalockley @hawsx3 @durkakakayata @littlecellist

[thekingslover]

Jetski For Sale (Lokius fic)

He stops riding the jetski.

He keeps it on the small trailer at the end of his driveway beside his modest split-level home and covers it with a blue tarp.

Every morning, in his brown button-up pajamas and a bathrobe, he walks to the end of the driveway and collects the morning paper. He’s careful to hold his coffee mug steady as he leans down, but he always manages to spill a drop or two. His slippers are covered in tiny coffee spots.

He tucks the newspaper under his arm and turns back toward his house. He left the television on; through the window, the screen flashes with the bright white letters, Breaking News! Two houses down, his neighbor is already out mowing the lawn. Further away, a dog barks.

Though he lives alone, it’s a perfect life. Everything’s simple. His mortgage is affordable. His brown sedan is paid off. And the jetski...

He doesn’t remember buying it. He always wanted one, dreamed of it. He had a savings set aside for someday. Yet... his savings is still there, and he still has this jetski.

He looks at it now, at the way it bulges under the tarp. A shame to leave it like that. He should take it out again. But the last time he did that...

Shaking his head, he walks back to the house. He drinks his coffee and reads his newspaper. He goes to work, comes home, goes to sleep, and does it all again the next day.

“Something’s different about you,” his sister says on the phone, their weekly call. “You sound different.”

“Same old me.” He’s good at keeping back his feelings and pushing forward the cheer.

She knows, though. Older sisters always seem to. “Are you sure you haven’t been seeing anyone lately?”

This sends him laughing. “A secret boyfriend? Come on, you have quite an imagination on you.”

“Laugh all you want,” she says, stern. She’s not backing down, though her voice does soften as she adds, “It’s only that you... Well, you sound... heartbroken.”

“That’s...” He should deny it. He hasn’t dated anyone in a good long while, but, well, now that she mentions it... He’s had his heart broken before, long ago, and it felt a little something like this. Like something crucial is suddenly missing. Like you spent so much time learning someone and adapting to them, shaping whole parts of your life around them, and then they are just... gone.

There’s a person-sized hole in his life now, but he can’t quite remember their shape.

No, that can’t be.

“That’s crazy,” he says, thinking, maybe I’m crazy.

“Why don’t you come visit us for a while?” she says. “The kids would love to see you.”

“Yeah,” he says, shaky. “Yeah, maybe that’s a good idea. Tell them I love them. Love you too.” Then he hangs up.

*

That night, he lays on his back in bed and stares at the ceiling, afraid to look to his right. He used to sleep sprawled across the entire width of the bed, a true bachelor enjoying his bachelorhood. When did he start picking one side?

He turns over, facing away from the barren expanse of the rest of the mattress, but the bookshelf offers little comfort. Most of his books are about history, biographies on interesting characters from the past. There’s a couple of jetski magazines wedged in, too. But what catches his eye... He remembers buying it, knows he did, the morning after watching a documentary on the perception of time and space. The documentarian had written a book. The Mobius Strip.

Frowning, he doesn’t find any sleep that night, no matter how many long minutes he closes his eyes, or how many sheep he tries to count in his head.

Mobius.

It’s a mathematical theory. Not a name. But it wedges between his ribs and stays buried behind them.

He’s not even a maths guy! But he can’t shake it. It feels heavy, too important.

He tosses and turns. He reaches out to the other side of the bed, realizes its empty, and snaps upright, dread overtaking him for one sharp moment before he remembers that its supposed to be empty.

This is normal. This is his perfect little life.

He flops back into bed and runs a hand down his face. Maybe he should go visit his sister, before he fully loses his mind.

*

His hands shake the next morning when he walks out to get the newspaper at the end of the driveway. Half his coffee spills when he leans to pick it up, but its fine. Maybe he should give up coffee entirely. Maybe too much caffeine is his problem.

He doesn’t know what’s wrong with him.

Turning towards the house, he spots the jetski, there under the blue tarp. The mysterious jetski that he doesn’t remember buying. The one, when he’s out on it, he sits too far forward, like he’s making space for someone behind him. But there’s no one there. There’s never anyone there.

The jetski, he decides, was the start of his problems. Maybe if he... If he...

Storming back into the house, he leaves what’s left of his coffee in the sink and the newspaper forgotten on the counter, and hurries into the office. He rips off a long sheet of dot matrix printer paper. Biting off the cap of his pen, he scribbles on it in large block letters, all caps, FOR SALE.

Back in the driveway, he removes the chocks from behind the wheels of the trailer, and flips off the tarp. He wheels the trailer and the jetski to the end of the driveway, right up against the road.

He must look like a mad man, out there in his brown button-up pajamas and coffee-stained slippers. The neighbor’s mowing the lawn. The dog’s barking further away. Everything’s perfect in this perfect little neighborhood, this perfect little life. But he feels like he is going insane.

He slaps the for sale sign on the front of the jetski, and starts back for the house. The sooner that thing is out of his life... Maybe... Maybe things would go back to normal.

His heart pangs in a way he doesn’t understand. Heartache. So much heartache. Why?

Does he even want normal?

But if not that, then what? What is he missing?

He’s at his front door, hand on the doorknob, when someone politely coughs behind him. He pauses a moment, there’s no way someone is there... But when he glances over his shoulder - yeah. Someone’s behind him, only a few feet away.

Not just someone. The most gorgeous person he has ever seen, wearing a sleek black suit and a pair of sunglasses. Long dark hair is slicked back and pushed behind their ears.

He should probably feel self-conscious, standing there in his brown pajamas in front of this god of a person - probably a model - but he doesn’t. Strangely, he feels more at ease now than he has in weeks. His whole body relaxes like he finally exhaled a held breath.

But that doesn’t make sense. They’ve never met. He would remember.

He would never forget a face like that.

“Hello,” the person says, and the word tremors slightly.

“Hello.” It tremors when he says it too.

There’s no car on the road. No bicycle on the sidewalk. However this person got here, it’s like they dropped down from the sky.

The person clears their throat. “You’re selling the jetski?”

“You...” He blinks. He knew jetskis were popular - hell, they are the best - but he hadn’t expected an offer before he even got his pants on. “Yeah. You interested?”

“Yes, I...” They drop their head a moment, taking their time to think. When they lift their head again, their shoulders lift too, like they are preparing for a battle.

He supposes negotiations can be seen as a battle, but he can’t bring himself to match the person’s pose. He’s ready to give up the jetski for free at this point. Whatever gets it gone.

The person asks, “What’s wrong with it?”

“Nothing’s wrong with it. It runs like a dream.”

“Then why get rid of it?”

His heart hurts, so he laughs through the pain. It’s silly, but he can’t help feel his sister was right. This person wouldn’t know either way, so he finds himself telling them, “I’m heartbroken.”

The person goes very still. Their mouth opens and they take in a shaky, noisy breath. When they say, “What?” the word is bone dry and crumbling.

“It’s something we did together... I think.” He’s making it up, but it feels right. So he keeps talking. “And now. Well. It kinda reminds me of... I’m pretty sure I forgot a lot of things, but I can’t forget that. There’s supposed to be someone else. And I can’t... I can’t...”

He’s not making any sense, but the person is hanging on every single word.

“Anyway,” he says. “I’ll let it go cheap. Too many memories... or... I don’t know, feelings?” He sighs. “Just make me an offer, okay? I have to get ready for work.”

He wants nothing more than to keep this beautiful person on his doorstep, but... well, life isn’t always about getting what you want. This person wants a jetski, he has one. A transaction will occur, and this person will move forward like he never existed.

He’ll be left behind again.

Again?

Now, he’s the one to stand a little straighter. “Do you ever get deja vu?”

“Deja vu?”

“You know, where you feel like you’ve lived an exact moment already, once before. I’ve been reading this book about mobius strips and...” There’s that pang again, in his chest. A subtle ache that is swelling. He wants to ignore it, like he always has, but he’s finding he can’t really anymore. “Don’t you think that’d be a cool name? Mobius. Mobius M. Mobius.” He laughs, and it hurts. It hurts.

The person doesn’t laugh. Instead, they take a small step back. “I shouldn’t have come here.”

His laughter dies quickly. It wasn’t real anyway. “You don’t want the jetski?”

“I do,” the person says with naked longing. “More than anything.”

“Then its yours.” He shrugs. “You know, it kinda feels like it was already yours? Like, maybe its just been waiting around for you to show up and claim it.”

The person shakes their head. “It’s better off without me. It finally has a chance to... to... live the way you - it deserves...”

“I mean, that’s a nice thought. But in practice... wouldn’t it be better for jetskis to decide for themselves the kind of lives they want? Whose to say that their life before was all that great? Because let me tell you, this perfect little normal life I’m living? Kinda sucks.” He doesn’t really understand what he’s saying, but the words still fall out of him, like ripping a scab off an old wound and all the blood starts running again.

The person takes another step back, but this time, he follows, taking a step forward. Somehow, it feels crucial that he not let this person leave him behind again.

There, another again. What is he not remembering?

“There’s something terribly wrong with all this,” he says. “I’m forgetting something important, but whatever it is - whoever - I don’t think I can be happy without them. Not really. Not in any way that matters.”

“Mobius...” the person says, soft, under their breath. Stronger, “You don’t know what you’re saying.”

And the dam breaks.

“I know exactly what I’m saying, Loki.” The name, that name. How could he forget that name?

The person - Loki - exhales again, watery this time.

“Maybe if we never met, this would be enough. Maybe it was once. But not anymore. Never again. Not since you. And not even your little mind hocus pocus could change that.”

Mobius takes another step forward. This time, Loki does not move back. They stay just as they are and let Mobius close the distance. Mobius lifts his hands to Loki’s face and slowly removes those sunglasses. Loki’s eyes have always been the most expressive - the easiest to read. No wonder they would try to hide them. Because now they shine with sorrow and regret and... love. So much love.

And that, Mobius knows, is exactly what he’s been looking for when he reaches out to the empty space beside him on the bed. When he sits in his kitchen and stares at the pulled-out chair across the table. When he rides his jetski and turns, ready to laugh with the missing person behind him.

“I’m not angry,” Mobius says, tossing the sunglasses aside. He takes one of Loki’s hands in his. Loki grips hard onto his fingers. “I understand why you did it. It’s kind of flattering really, to know you’d give up your own happiness to try to give me mine. But there was a very big problem with this latest Loki scheme.”

“What’s that?” Loki asks in a whisper.

Mobius gives them a smile. The first real one since they parted. “You’re unforgettable.”

Loki laughs once, a burst, like they’ve been holding something in and now its escaping. The hard lines of their face smooth out. And they look less like a frightened, broken shadow and more like themselves, god of mischief, with a small but growing smirk. “Of course. I suppose I should have considered that.”

“Big flaw. Ruined the whole thing, to be honest.”

Loki leans closer. “I hate to admit to fault, but I fear there was a second issue that I had not considered.”

“Oh, yeah? What’s that?”

“Your absolute stubbornness.”

“Stubborn? Me? You should look in the mirror, pal.”

Loki closes their eyes a moment. Mobius studies the planes of their perfect face, and wonders how, in all the infinite timelines, he ever forgot it. 

“Loki,” Mobius says. “Do me a favor, though, huh? Don’t do this again. I... uh, well. It wasn’t the most fun for me.”

“Me, either.” Loki presses their forehead to Mobius’s. “I regretted every moment, but I... The TVA stole you from your life. I wanted to -”

“I know, I get it. I’m not mad. But communication is key to a relationship, yeah? So maybe next time you want to do a grand gesture of love for me, we should talk about it first?”

Loki leans back. They blink. But it’s not the love that trips them up, it’s, “Relationship?”

Mobius runs his hands along Loki’s arms, up to the shoulders and back down to the elbows. “Yeah. I mean, we’re partners, right?”

“Partners.” Loki doesn’t say the word with disgust, more... intrigue.

“Boyfriends?” Mobius tries.

“Boyfriends.” Loki frowns at that one.

“Lovers?”

Loki’s eyes are bright and full of wonder. How they could look at Mobius, someone so normal, like that... well. Loki makes Mobius feel like a god himself, no wonder he couldn’t go back to his old life.

“Lovers,” Loki says and kisses Mobius. Mobius smiles against their lips. Lovers, it is, then.

Kiss turns to kisses, and they linger. It’s right, so right that it further amplifies how wrong everything else was before. Mobius belongs here. Right here. With Loki. Forever, if possible.

When they break, they both laugh, and it’s light and true this time, for both of them.

“Hey, Loki,” Mobius says. “Want to buy a jetski?”

Loki pulls an annoyed face, but its all an act - Mobius sees right through it, and Loki’s not trying that hard to hide it. “I believe I’m the one who acquired that jetski for you. You have no right to sell it.”

“It was a gift,” Mobius says.

“It remains a gift. One I insist you keep.”

“Alright, alright,” Mobius laughs and Loki kisses him at the corner of his smile. “But only if you promise to keep me.”

“Oh, dear Mobius.” Loki brings their mouth to Mobius’s ear. “I hope you appreciated this display of selflessness, because I will not be repeating it.”

“Good.”

“I am a selfish god.”

“Uh, huh.”

Loki’s arms grip tightly around Mobius’s waist. “And from here to eternity, I will be keeping what’s mine.”

The last remaining knots in Mobius’s chest untangle. “And the jetski.”

“And the jetski,” Loki says and kisses him again.

[mack3030]

i feel like you're a c0mmie /lh

First of all, there is a reason that assume is spelled the way it is, but I'll answer this seriously because I'm in the mood to. First of all, hating how commercialism and monetization has taken over what should be an open-source community does not mean I am a communist. It means that I just think that there are some places and communities that don't need everything to be transactionary. I'm all for people making money with their own labor, talent and tools but the truth is, when you're making works for the Sims 4, the labor and talent is not all you. And I personally don't think it's fair for people to monetize what is essentially a derivitive work, especially when they use that as an excuse to act like asshats to the community on top of it. First of all, you are using EA's platform/game which they worked hard on as a display for your work. To get your CC, poses, or mods to work in the game, you have to use their tuning files, and/or clone their objects in Sims 4 Studio or another similar program. Which, ironically...let's think about it...oh wait...Sims 4 Studio is a FREE program that someone else made. And they FREELY update it and add important patch-fixes to the community for zero cost. Again. Not your work. In addition, there are a LARGE number of very WELL known sims 4 creators {especially in the alpha side of things} who are converting from 3D models they didn't make in the first place, and doing it unethically without talking to the original owners of the models. So that compounds the "not your work" argument further. If people want to sell 3D stuff they made on a 3D modeling site, or on a site that has terms that allow it like secondlife, they can go wild. But this community, when it originally started, hated and villified paywallers, because the community was open and focused on sharing and being creative. Sadly, we've strayed from how things used to be, and have slowly let in drips and drips of monetization until we basically expect that everything we try to download is going to lead to an ad or a patreon-locked page. And that f'ing sucks.

Also, let's turn to the dictionary and look up COMMUNISM, shall we? {Because I'm the daughter of a history teacher, and I like talking about history and stuff like this.}

If I were a communist, here are some statements I'd probably make: - We all own all CC that is made, and can freely share it regardless of who made it in the first place. [Oh wait, I've talked before about how you should talk to people who own rights to the original 3D models, and how we shouldn't share early access content. Darn.] - Each person who is the community must work for the betterment of the community. Nobody can freeload, or else they will not get any cc or spoils at all. [But wait, I've never said anything about how everyone has to work on something to receive CC. Because obviously I currently don't have the talent yet to make custom content by myself. Darn it again.]

- People should be paid based on their cc making abilities. So people who mesh their own stuff like Bill L and Syb should be paid more than people who convert! [Wait, I've not said that either. I have said that people need to be ethical and give credit when converting, but I haven't said that people who hand mesh deserve to be paid more...shucks.] Also, let me be real....communism is one of those things that is often FORCED upon people. The main people who choose to be communist, are usually people high up in the ponzi-scheme that is that political system, because they want to gain power, wealth, or other resources off the backs of their people. Many people who are in communist countries don't choose to be communist, they just...are...because the people in power are and make them be that way. It's a system that benefits few, and hurts many. And that's not what I'm about. The fact that you're so ignorant about how this system causes people to suffer while those in power grow rich and fat just shows your immaturity {and your lack of capitalization doesn't help either}. I'm an artist. I believe artistic spaces should be about sharing and creating, not profit. Especially when the PLATFORM and the TOOLS we are given to make that art are not our own. I feel making a profit off a community that already has been fleeced so much by EA is just ethically yucky. One last thing, here's a couple documentaries about Communism and Facism, should you decide you want to educate yourself on how those political systems actually work, and why they should be avoided: How to Become a Tyrant - Documentary Series, Netflix Evolution of Evil - Documentary Series, Amazon Prime Video I would highly recommend both as they dive very deeply into what makes someone a dictator, and you will find that communism/facism are both primary tools used by evil people suffering from delusions of grandeur to achieve such power over their people. I'd also recommend reading books on the subject, but you don't seem like the type who'd enjoy that. I hope you've learned a little something. If you don't like my answer, here's where you can go to solve that problem!

[seostudios]

GEEK CHARMING: MARK LEE

pairing: mark lee x fem!reader genre: rom-com, fluff, angst, comedy info: high school!au, film-club-kid!mark, diva!reader, non-idol!au, mentions of other members (principle!sicheng, car!jeno, student-body-president!doyoung,  film-club-kid!johnny, film-club-kid!jungwoo) synopsis: You are Yonsei Academy's peachy princess, having the best boyfriend, the most fashionable friends of mos, always updated with the latest trends in fashion. But you come face-to-face with your own personal creature-self-professed film nerd, Mark Lee, when you scratch your Holli crystal-embellished ROSANTICA purse. In exchange for her purse repair she let Mark film her for his high school popularity documentary. Reluctantly, you let low-class Mark into your A-list universe, and you are stunned to discover that nerds can be pretty awesome at times. However when your pro-claimed, boyfriend charming prince dumps you flat, your life and social status drops. Would you still win Spring Formal Queen at Yonsei Academy now? Will Mark win the Annual Film Festival?  Could even you put together the pieces to bring back your happy-ever-after, with Mark 's help? warnings: swearing, mention of alcohol word count: 7.5k tag-list: @count-your-shadows​ @jimjamjaemin @minaczennie @renjunvinates @pervieve @rjoonie @marksrainbow@commentgirl @rarestgrace @08skrr @bangtanismylifw @traashytae @superheros-and-others @johnnysnipple @00-baejin-05

a/n: this is the longest writing piece i’ve written yet on this blog and it’s inspired by a disney movie?! behold geek charming starring mark lee. your local film club nerd entering the school’s prissy princess’s life but did that make her finally turn back from her arogant ways or did it make her more of a bitch!! >_< i’m actually so happy

"I'm proud to announce this year's Annual Yonsei Spring Formal Queen Kang-" 

"Hello? Y/n? Snap out of it." Your train of thought quickly crashed as you direct your attention to the student body president, Kim Doyoung. "Y-Yes?" You ask, straightening your posture. "I asked if you are applying for Spring Formal Queen?" He put a question to, waiting for a response. Viewing as you turn to Sooyoung, who delivers you a pen, jerking it out her hand, you grab the clipboard from the plastic table in front of you, signing your signature on to the paper. Making sure your sign was large enough to cover most slots of the page. 

"Toodles," You sang to Doyoung before you and the girls walk away. “Next!”

The three of you strut down the narrow hallway, Sooyoung and Yuna trailing behind you, "This year is going to be our year ladies," you look over on both sides to see them smiling wide grins enveloping onto their lips, as they stopped to walk at your pace, "Once I'm crowned Queen of the Spring Formal, it's guaranteed I'm the well-liked, prettiest and just overall the best here at Yonsei," you finish halting your steps at the door frame of the cafeteria. Looking over your shoulder, you make a gagging motion with your finger to the pack of hungry students. In front of you three, you decide to walk through the tables showing the two lingering behind how you'd win the students' heart if you already haven't.

Walking by a table with miniature stage set-ups, you see three students huddled together revising a script "Drama kids," You start "They'll be an easy vote seeing how they just adore my dramatic gestures," Making your way down a couple more tables "Film club nerds..." You start to roll your eyes coming up with a reason why they would vote for you. "You're like a movie star to them," Sooyoung quickly interjected watching as your flip your head to pose.

You stride down some more, "I can't believe you used to be friends with Shin Ryunjin." Yuna throws in as you walk by the stage crew table. "I know right," Sooyoung agrees. "It's a burden I carry, but at least I traded up to you two." You say earning beaming smiles on both sides.

"Y/n!" Someone called, skipping happily towards you. It was Jisoo. "I got bangs since you said they would suit me! I couldn't agree more, thanks!" She beams, "Of course, just want the best for you!" You smile, reciprocating the energy she gave off until she walks off to her friends. "See? People know I care. This will be a piece of cake."  You said before stopping in your tracks to see, Jung Wonyoung; your biggest competition at Yonsei Academy. Yuna and Sooyoung see you as someone superior to them (right?). As a higher-ranked princess here at Yonsei you shouldn't let such a wretched thing like Jung Wonyoung get to you, especially with that tacky head-band she decided to pair with her uniform. But what good candidate for Spring Formal Queen would you be without a little competition, winning was a given but winning unopposed is an embarrassment. The girls notice your stink-eye towards the table and rather than letting yourself get angered in front of your girls, you oppose chatting in the most unaffected way you could muster up. "Whatever, we all understand who's gonna be crowned Queen, why let someone who pairs blue polka-dot headbands with navy plaid uniforms get in my way?" They hum in response as you two make your way to the popular table.

Yuna and Sooyoung took their seats in front of Jihoon, your lovely, amazing, perfect boyfriend, as you walked around to sit next to him. "Hi baby," He said, which sounded scripted but, you paid no attention to since he was your prince charming! His looks over-looking his flaws, you leave a small kiss on his cheek before digging into your meal.

You are finished your meal, getting up and walking to the bin to throw. On your way back you- BAM! Right on the chest, you are greeted with the expired milk the canteen provides having it spill all over your chest,  drenched. "Ugh!" You cry, a boy in front of you with his lunch tray now on the floor, his hair scruffed up with a school-provided bow-tie. "You- You geek!" You bark as he is taken aback with his words, but he isn't afraid. "You are so gro-oss!" You shout emphasizing the word gross he's already tired of your shit and it hasn't even been a minute since your first encounter. Without hesitating he relates "Actually gross is one syllable-", "I don't care just go- just go read a book or something, you nerd!" You argue not wanting to hear what he has to say before marching away out the cafeteria.

The boy watches as you make your way out the commissary. He kicks his tray to the side, walking back to his table with a glint of annoyance struck onto him.

"Dark Victory of course. It stars Bette Davis, George Brent and most importantly Humphrey Bogart from Casablanca." Jungwoo said swiftly to the two geeks in front of him. Johnny, the only one of the three who could properly score a date with the popular kids started a debate on which film from the late 1930s to the early '50s was le Meilleur which is French for  'the best'. "Did you forget The Great Lie? Probably one of Bette Davis's only good films since she has co-starred with the one and only Mary Astor" He argues speedily. "Hello??" Nayeon says budding in between, "A Stolen Life will remain the best film from the 40s, 50s, and possibly forever I will and could go on about-", "Looks like Film Club's assistant president finally showed up," Johnny says cutting off whatever nonsense Nayeon probably had to add to their already ridiculous conversation. "Sorry, I got stuck in traffic with Yonsei's little princess," Mark says with an obvious eye-roll.

"Watch your words Markie,"  Jungwoo quickly told him. "Her dad-"

"Who funds 75% of the school!" Johnny added, Jungwoo turned to his side giving an annoyed stare before looking back in front of him to Mark. "Her dad who funds 75% of the school. Will ruin you if he gets notice of his daughter's uniform being spoiled with the cafeteria's milk from a film geek." He finishes sipping on his water. Nayeon turned to him, "He can get our club shut down within minutes Mark, watch how you talk to her." 

"So what? Like they'll even come close to us." Mark scoffs, "They're like a whole new alien species." The two in front of them nod, but Nayeon is a little too distracted with the tuna sandwich her mom packed her. "You guys is it just me or is the tuna moving..." Nayeon says slapping Marks forearm softly to grab his, then everyone else's attention. Just before she did Mark's attention was already taken by something- or should I say someone else. "Hey Ryunjin," He quickly says waving towards the girl walking by towards the exit, she turns around to wave before heading out. That's where Johnny inquired, "Face it. You and Ryunjin" He brings his hands up and around to make an 'x' with it, "Never gonna happen." He says watching his shoulders sag slightly, "You've been crushing on her since what? 8th grade, and having numerous occasions to ask her out and not doing so. You missed your shot awhile back unless we had a time machine you and name are a no-go." He finished now invested in what Nayeon's sandwich was up to.

"I-I'd go out with you!" Nayeon says dropping the sandwich into Johnny's hands. "Look, I don't even have time for dating why would I even ask Ryunjin out? I'm cool with being known by her. Plus there's no way I'd do it now, the school board's Annual Film festival is only a little over a month away, I'm our school's candidate how do I mess up because I was distracted by some girl with purple highlights" He said flat-out ignoring Nayeon. "That's true," Johnny says leaning in, "And you are our school best shot at bringing home that huge ass trophy, what's the other prize again?" Jungwoo said agreeing before taking a bite of his pasta. "It's a summer getaway to a Hollywood film camp, I gotta win," Mark said signing the application forms he had in his pocket. "I'm supposed to be a cinematic genius, so what better to do than murder the competition and bring home a trophy after going on a getaway trip to Hollywood to better my knowledge I'm gonna be like the Frank Capra or Victor Fleming around here!"

Johnny grabs Marks's application form to read the requirements, "You have to document something and make it worthwhile..." He read aloud, "What's the documentary about?" Jungwoo asked, "I have no idea." Mark said before snatching the paper. "He has no idea...." Jungwoo whispered almost inaudible in disappointment. Mark writes down ideas on the back of the paper while discussing it with Jungwoo, "So," Johnny starts, "Wanna go out with me?" He said. "No." Nayeon answers strictly as if she was waiting to reject the boy who's attention was back onto her tuna sandwich.

"Anyway, I gotta go hand this into Principle Dong." Mark said witnessing the awkward interaction before getting up and leaving the vicinity

He was playing with the hourglass on his office desk when a knock on the door was heard. "Come in!" He chirped and in came a student. "Ah, Mark." He sang motioning the boy to sit down while he took his legs off the desk. "Came to finally hand me those application forms I've been begging your little club to hand over I see." He said noticing the paper in hand. "Haha, Yea," Mark said avoiding eye contact as he brought his hand up to hand the paper. "Can't wait to see what one of my star students has prepared for the Festival." He said opening the folded paper reading aloud, "A documentary about how lunch ladies keep old food fresh, and our bellies full," His voice started off strong going quieter word by word, looking up at him. "Yeah, you know how the lunch ladies always give us the same green looking sauce every day, or the same batch of oatmeal cookies from months back, every time we sink our teeth into it. It tastes fresh! I've always wanted to know and I think it'd be a cool thing to find out" Mark your blabbering, Is what Principle Dong wanted to tell him so he'd shut up. He didn't want a lame documentary about something to make his school look bad in to be put out in front of dozens of other schools. "Mark." He stops the boy, "Your artistic vision is lunch ladies?" He asked. "Yes, NO! But yes? I'm struggling I can't come up with a good topic that's not gonna bore students and teachers." Mark said. Mr.Dong could see how strongly Mark expressed his struggles with a mere school contest, he probably wants that prize more than anything. He knows he shouldn't help him, since it'd be unfair but he wasn't gonna let him put out something that can ruin his reputation. "Stop playing safe Mark. Challenge yourself by widening your perspective maybe instead of documenting lunch and stuff that you know will bore people and try going after something to catch their attention." Mark's eyes slowly open as he looks up to Principle Dong nodding understandingly "Alright I get it, I get it" He says before clasping his hands together. Mr.Dong sees his improvement and instead of picking another student to compete he can rely on Mark who's now being ushered out the room by him, "Now don't forget I need a new proposal by tomorrow." He said before shutting his door.

"Dude I know exactly what Mr.Dong was getting at,"  Jungwoo tells him. Their school day was over about two hours ago and now they were at their part-time job, at Yong's, a popular little cafe in the middle of a jam-packed shopping mall. "Something challenging...like I don't know maybe a certain diva you encountered during lunch?" His eyes lit up, looking over his shoulder to look at a grinning Jungwoo who flipped his non-existent long flocks of hair like he was the diva. "You're a genius!" Mark said now ecstatic, but quickly going back to his little stressed self, "No, but then how am I gonna convince her?" He said placing his hand up under his chin. 

The bell rings by the entrance, which meant there was a costumer quickly brushing off crumbs from a cupcake he snuck in he turns around to see his proposal for the Film Festival itself. You looked different, you were wearing a pair of plaid pants with a tightly fitted black turtleneck, accessorized by dangling earrings, a heart pendant necklace and a simple gold chain. Your face was quick to cringe after seeing who was about to take your order, "Ugh It's you." You spit looking him up and down, he doesn't look too bad out of school you thought before handing one of the many many bags of clothes to your father's butler. "Here Minho, get a seat for us, please," You tell him watching him rush to one of the many empty seats. "Hi, Welcome to Yong's what can I get for you today?" Mark asked, tone sounding uninterested. "Shouldn't you be happy to see me? I am a miraculous sight for sore eyes," You said getting a half-suppressed laugh from Mark. "Anyway, I would like a grande green tea latte. one pump classic, nonfat, 6 enormous scoops of matcha, 195 degrees, and ABSOLUTELY NO FOAM." You finish, right before starting back up again, "And,  I would like a venti caramel frappe with extra caramel drizzle." You finish finally reaching into your purse to pull out your (dad's) card. When you go to hand the card you see not only Mark but also Jungwoo looking at you, mouths open, jaws almost touching the floor. "Did you not get it? Do I have to repeat my order or something?" You say with a hint of irritation, "Ah- No. Sorry it'll  be 15.50" Mark said averting his gaze from you.

After paying you, tell Mark, "bring it to my table will you?" before walking off to Minho.

"Dude go," Now's Mark's time to actually shine. He makes sure the drinks are perfect knowing ruining them could ruin his entire attempt.  He strides along between the tables finally towards your booth handing you both your drinks. But Mark just stood there, you motioned with your hand as you would to stray animals. "Why are you just standing there, go do your job?" You said already bothered, "Nope, I have a proposal for you.", "Whatever it is, No." You said not even wanting to hear what he's got to say, "I'm gonna ask anyway." He said towering over you and you seated butler. "I want you to star in my movie for the Film Festival this year," You look up, surprised an obvious smile dancing over your lips. "What's it about?" You asked still not sure, "You! I'll have to document your lifestyle til the Spring Formal." Mark said. You bit your lip not knowing to go through or not, but it was a nice ego boost, having someone film your daily life, letting everyone know you got the best friends and most fashionable friends, a prince-charming and a purse worth more than your teacher's salary. Jung Wonyoung, who's also a runner up for Spring Formal Queen having the football team paint her posters and make pins but what's that compared to a freaking movie documenting your life...Winning this year is gonna be easier than expected. "Deal," You said, Mark, cheers a little too loud before bringing his hand out to shake, you reject kindly before letting him know "Don't look like a freaking weirdo at school though. We can start tomorrow at lunch," You finish before seeing him run off to Jungwoo.

Finally home being able to rest from begin outrageously gorgeous today you skip down to your bedroom, hoping into the shower then changing into a more comfortable attire. As of now you were in the middle of your bed doing some homework before the phone went off, it was a notification from Ryunjin, she tagged you in an Instagram post of you and her when you were younger. Your mom took that photo on the first day of grade school back when you and Ryunjin were inseparable. Mom died later that same year and it was heartbreaking but you were stronger than that you knew you shouldn't pity yourself, or have others pity you simply because she passed away, she wouldn't want you to be like that. 

It was a brand new day and Mark was in the principle's office, don't worry this star is nowhere near in trouble when Mark hands in his proposal. "This is marvellous, I can see the growth Mark. Please keep me updated,"  Mr.Dong said watching Mark skip away cheerfully to lunch, where he'd meet you. Fridays at Yonsei were known as the only days of the week students didn't have to wear uniforms to school which often made them pull together a swagger (Johnny's words not mine) outfit for the rest of the school to see. Mark wasn't one to dress up on these days so today he decided to wear his black and blue striped t-shirt paired with black denim jeans,  his black hair parted in the middle this time. He did not look like a film kid. He looked like he belonged to sit beside you, "Hey" you were busy opening up your lunch when he stood behind you with his camera. "Oh-" In all honesty, you thought he'd be wearing baggy trousers and a worn-out shirt but you were filled with joy to see him looking presentable to you. "Hey, sit." You said to him, "I'm gonna just cut to the chase and record..." He said fiddling with the camera for a minute too long, "A few rules before you point that thing in my face," you started as he lifted his face to see you, "Absolutely no filming my left side, no hanging a minute later after filming I need you out of my sight when I hear you say cut." You were strict but not so sure if you meant it. He gave you a thumbs up before clicking record.

"So, Y/n why are you so determined to be Queen at the annual Spring Formal" Mark asked zooming in and out for a few seconds finally focusing, "Because it ensures permanent popularity and I can't fall from my throne can I?" You ask, "Aren't you already popular?" He asked looking up from the camera confused, "Companies at the top of the list don't need to advertise but they do it because..?" , "They need to stay at the top of the list," Mark says understanding where you were getting at. "Exactly, it's not easy to be popular like me nowadays," You say placing your hair behind your ear, "So not easy being like Y/n" Yuna said, Sooyoung agreeing. "Girls not now, this is my time-" , "Actually if they wanna add something they-", "Being popular isn't something you can just fool around with, it's like royalty to us hormonal teens. It's not easy, I gotta live up to these beauty standards, and be on my A-Game whenever." You finish. Not knowing what to say next you smile at the camera hoping Mark would do something- anything but suddenly your knight in shining armor is here- Jihoon takes a seat next to you. "Oh Babe!" You say kissing his cheek; making sure it was on camera. "Only 10's can get date 10's like Jihoon, we're perfect for each other!" You express, but Mark snickers to the scene unfolding behind you watching Yuna and Sooyoung roll their eyes at that certain sentence. "Are you coming to my game today?" Jihoon asked, before noticing Mark. "Why is there a fucking geek near us," He barks but you quickly come to the save. "Ji, we went through this. Mark here is going to be making a movie on how I win Spring Formal Queen." You say, gripping his hand slightly so he could get the memo. "He better not show up to my games", "Never, just eat." You said as he glares at the boy. "Alright, and cut." Mark said before getting up, "Thank you." 

"So...you don't have a job?" Mark asked filming you going through a bunch of clothes, you shake your head no. "You just shop til' you drop huh?" He asked amused at your simple lifestyle, "Of course, now don't come in here this is a school film." You said going into the change room. "Here she comes," You cheered (for yourself) minutes after changing into a short black skirt which was most definitely breaking dress code and a tight white long sleeve which had a deep cut in the back. Mark's mouth is slightly agape seeing you, you were gorgeous indeed he thought. "So tell me what it's like to be...." He trails off trying to find a synonym for the popular " Amazing? Well, there are levels of popularity, at the top moi, and at the bottom..you." You said giving him a grisly glare."Ou! Love these!" You acclaim to a pair of black heels, "Hate these." You say to a set of hot pink ones beside them. "I have two of these!" You declare cheerfully at a pair of white heels which shimmered with sparkles; definitely your style. "How do people get popular?" Mark asked, ignoring your admiration over ridiculously cruel footwear. "Well some are just born with it," You say then go in closer, covering your mouth in a whisper action, "But some gotta follow the diva's around for it." You said, clearly talking about Sooyoung and Yuna.

"Gonna try these on, out Geek," you said to Mark who was almost walking in there with you. "Oh- right sorry!" He said now moving over to your two (deemed) friends. "So, since she's not here... " Mark started  getting the camera up to focus on the two, "Do you have anything about Y/n you can spill?" He asked, "Like, does your popularity only come from following her around," Yuna was quick to fire back, "We may not be as popular as Y/n, but we do know some secrets..." She trails off letting Sooyoung start. "Like when Y/n doesn't get her way, she has the biggest hissy fit,", "And Jihoon is only with her cause he likes the attention, you know to she makes him feel better about himself," Mark couldn't understand how your two announced friends were fundamentally spilling everything about you to an insignificant camera and film nerd. "Behold!" You squeal opening the curtains, to reveal your outfit (which admittedly, had Mark's jaw drop). You were some-what dress shopping for the Spring Formal and you saw this magnificent dress, a silk orchid dress which fell all the way down to your knees frilling at the bottom. The right amount of skin and the right about of puff! You thought; pairing it up with black heels, "God, I look fantastic. What do you think?" You ask the three in front of you, "You-I think you look great!" Mark said the camera to his side, "Film!" You shouted suddenly, as he ponderously brought the camera back up. "Ladies?" You ask the two behind Mark, "You look so good!", "Agreed." They say. The four of you voted to get smoothies before departing and you were ever so willing to pay for all four, "So popular people can't hang out with... nerds?"  He asked filming you sip on the mango smoothie, "Of course we don't," He moved on, placing the camera down to take a sip out of his smoothie thinking there wasn't too much to embellish on, although you continue. "It's better that way, no interference. Why would a dime like me hang out with a nickel?"  You asked oh so wisely which made Mark mumble a WTF. "See, if you two were to go out... The school would go mad as a hatter and it's not gonna end well on both ends." Yuna adds you look to her in the seat beside you, giving her a warning look to 'not talk this is my movie' as she sinks in her seat. Mark sees the silence as an opportunity to ask a question from his cue cards filled with questions that would have something engaging, after finding something to grab not only your attention but the audience about to watch this's attention, he springs the question on you. What if you don't win Spring Formal Queen? "What if I don't? That's not a question, of course, I will? If I don't my life will be over!" You said sliding your drink aside stressing the word over. 

It was in the late hours of the evening and Mark was confined inside his bedroom, editing and stressing. How was this a high school documentary? She only cares about herself, 'fashionable' friends, and prince charming, in which two out of the three didn't even care about her. Maybe she's like this because of what it's like at home? He thought questioning about your at-home life was. Does she have a deep heart-aching past which makes her act like such a nuisance? Nah who am I kidding this isn't some movie. His night was mostly spent, under his blanket with a laptop screen shining into his eyes (probably the reason why he has contacts). 

Saturdays were beach days. That's what Jihoon always said. You'd meet him at the beach where all the (popular) kids from school would go on Saturday mornings, not to sun-bathe but to attend the main volleyball matches would be held. The teams were unauthorized, but for the student's entertainment, our Yonsei's official volleyball team would pick Saturday mornings for a friendly event against Joongdong High. You texted Mark beforehand to meet you there which took him a minute to agree on, but only if he brought his friends, Johnny and Jungwoo. "Hey, you're late!" You tell the boy who's jogging towards you with his tiny camera, you look behind him to see a taller fellow, "And you brought  friends..." You said uninterested and rather irritated, "I'm gonna help Mark, so you look extra beautiful today Y/n!" He quickly said chiming in; his effort in pleasing you was extraordinary. You give him a small smile before nodding. You look beside Mark to see a familiar face, "Johnny!" You cheer before embracing the boy, "Hey Queen Bee" He joked, as you slap his arm jokingly. You and Johnny's dads are business partners, which often made you two spend time together growing up so, in your world, Johnny was your only nerd. Mark just awkwardly stands the before Johnny scatters away with Jungwoo for soda cans, but Mark follows you. Mark was busy filming your little interactions with Jihoon before catching a glimpse of his Ryunjin. He thinks to himself, I can put the camera down for a second, before jogging to Ryunjin, who was getting a soda from the vending machine. "Hey," He said awkwardly. "Hi Mark, didn't come across to you being a beach guy..." She responded laughing at his getup in the hot climate. "OH, I'm just filming for Y/n." He stated catching 'O' shape form on her lips before they start talking casually. You back away, momentarily from the crowd to give yourself a little break, being gorgeous is a workout, you thought, before snickering. You look to your right to see Mark in the distance talking to a brown-haired girl, noticing the purple highlights, hidden between her locks, you realize it's not some rando,  it's Ryunjin. I have to get him out of there. You don't really think before grabbing a spare volleyball to flinging it over the crowd to Mark's head. Running over you ignore the girl aiding Mark, "Are you okay? You look okay. We don't have time for breaks." You said sternly before grabbing his arm and sprinting as fast as you could in a pencil skirt and orange stilettos.

"God, your so lucky I was your knight in shining armour out there. Saved you from your utterly wretched flirting." You tell Mark posing for the camera he set. "Flirting? What, no. Why would I flirt with Ryunjin?" He demanded panicked that you might do something knowing you. "Oh please, your crush on Ryunjin is way more obvious than Wonyoung's fake gold." You said adjusting the skirt you had on. "Can't believe I used to be her friend," You mutter, which he caught onto quickly, "Wait, what?", "Yea, in elementary but look at us now, way out of her league, she's almost at the bottom of the list with her, 'I'm in a rock band' getup." You spit before posing dramatically. 

You sit at the bench in front of the now, empty parking lot. Jihoon ditched you for 'pizza with the boys' to celebrate their victory along with the two friends who just needed to tag along for the sole purpose to tell everyone they hang out with the volleyball team during their free time. "Hey," Mark said sitting down beside you, "They left me and took my car." You say recalling Jihoon asking for your keys to drive to the pizza place. "Now I'm stuck here, do you have a car Mark, let's go somewhere." You whined quietly watching as Mark put his camera away, grabbing your hand to bring you away. "This is Jeno." Mark says, pointing to his Silver 1965 Oldsmobile, "He's getting old but isn't vintage a style you princesses adore?" He asked, chuckling before telling you to get in. "Spot on Film Geek!" You praise, before hopping in. You notice from the corner of your eye a group of kids from Yonsei walking by, you duck down, hiding from them "What are you doing now?" Mark asked confused, before noticing the batch walking down and taking a turn. "Okay Miss Popular, they're gone." He said a little insecure this time giving you a dry laugh. You notice from the corner of your eye a group of kids from Yonsei walking by, you duck down, hiding from them "What are you doing now?" Mark asked confused, before noticing the batch walking down and taking a turn. "Okay Miss Popular, they're gone." He said a little insecure this time giving you a dry laugh. The car failed Mark this time, and not wanting to break the already broken car he tells you "Let's bus it, this car isn't going to start anytime soon,", "What? No way I'm going inside a jam-packed van just for it to stop a block away from my place!" You argue. "God why don't you quit this diva act and just face were gonna walk back which is probably a little over two hours I know you won't ever do or take a thirty-minute bus ride which you should consider knowing your so-called prince took.", "What did you just call me? A diva? Hello?? I'm a star in your film!" You bark, now furious at the boy, "No. You are a stuck-up, arrogant, annoying brat who's in my film." He fired-back. No remorse at all. "You're-You're fired!" You shout. "No, this is my film you don't do the firing!" He said back, "Don't care, I'm the star here and I say you're fired!" You finish before he grabs your wrist, "Oh please I'm the only one who demands are going to be valid and I say you're fired." Mark finished walking away from the bus-stop down the street, leaving you alone and forced to call a cab.

Mark thinks he hit jack-pot, finally getting rid of you. "It's not too late to change projects right?" He tells himself on that gloomy Monday morning, combing his hair with his fingers in the mirror before going downstairs to eat breakfast. Here he was, eating a bagel in Principle Dong's office. "I'm afraid you can't Mark," He said towards the boy. 

"Hello! Yonsei!! It's me your future Spring Queen! Y/n! You want to better the halls of Yonsei? Vote for me, I'm sweet just like candy!!" You shout, the crowd you have in front of you, this was your way of campaigning. "Out of my way," Wonyoung says, grabbing the mic, to advertise and get people to vote for her. As per usual, she one-ups her opponent; you. "Oh my god, Y/n thanks for the advice on flirting, I finally got Wooseok to go with me for Spring Formal," Jisoo said, from behind making you turn with a happy smile, "So I can count on your vote?" Her smile faded quick, she mumbles a little something, before stuffing her face with the homemade cookie's Wonyoung provided, quick to run away.

It was almost the end of the school day and you were stuck in literature recapping on how to write proper paragraphs before your end of the year essay. You notice a semi-familiar face, Nayeon. You know she and Johnny are friends, so she must be close to Mark, you thought. You were gonna ask her to ask Mark to meet you but you'd rather not bring more geeks into your already geek-filled life. You read her phone screen that illuminated brightly in the dim-lit classroom. 'The Fifth Element is having a showing tonight,' A group chat called 'Hollywood's Trash' sent in, Mark would definitely be there. Writing down on a sticky note the address provided thankfully you slip it into your binder focusing your attention back on the lesson, this time with a smile.

You and probably the only other person you'd allow in your bedroom with you is Minho. He's been your family's butler for a little over 25 years now and has been with since day 1. Aiding since you unintentionally fell and cut a mark after attempting to bike without training wheels to strengthening you with your mother's passing. Minho was with you when he dropped you off at the very, very empty cinema. "They're probably inside, just wait until it's over which is..." He looks at his wrist, to his watch. "Another 10 minutes," He gives you an assuring smile before reaching over to open the door. "Knock em' dead," He tells you, before driving off. You sit on the sidewalk ledge with a soda in hand, sipping on it here and there until you began to see people walk out. Standing up, you pat down your skirt and look for anyone that resembles Mark. You see a short boy, black-parted hair and a graphic t-shirt paired with baggy trousers. "Mark!" You shout, he looks behind him to see your petite figure run up to him, "Hey," He said confused. "What are you doing right now?" you asked him eagerly, seeing him turn to Nayeon, Johnny and Jungwoo. "Yong's, we are totally digging sugar cookies," Jungwoo said before Mark could open his mouth, you smile leaning in a little closer to the odd trio,  "Mind if I tag along?", "No! Feel free." Johnny said, grabbing your forearm to drag you along. 

"God how can you guys drink those dreadful things," Nayeon said watching Johnny and Jungwoo gulp down smoothies. You and Mark already finished your drinks a while back, "Nayeon you do know, smoothies have a health glow about them? They’re often a fundamental part of cleanses, and they’re ubiquitous at health food stores and health-centric restaurants. And the smoothie trend is still going strong. Workout studios serve them up post-class, dietitians preach their powers and fit celebrities tout their nutritional prowess. The fruits used at Yong's are fresh and have antioxidant and anti-inflammatory benefits with low-sugar, employee's here have also learnt to provide fibre, calcium and vitamins A, C and K they add dark leafy greens like spinach or kale. "Y/n what the fuck??" Nayeon said. You stare at her dumbfounded... Have you said the wrong thing? Were you wrong?

It's still the early hours of twilight, and you are still wandering with Mark and his friends, roaming around the lit-up town. "So, since when did you get so smart?" Mark asked. The two of you were walking delayed to get a chance to talk after your dispute. "What do you mean I've always been like this," You said, a little offended he thought that low of your academic abilities. He mutters a 'wow' before continuing "Well I thought pretty diva's like you only cared about popularity and crowns," He said poking fun at our egotistic side. You gasp before laughing, "So you think I'm pretty?" You sneakily stated which made the boy stutter like crazy, he couldn't answer back without the rosy tint on his cheek growing so you continued on with a little heartfelt apology in hopes he'd continue the documentary. "Look I was hoping you'd let me hire you back to finish this stupid film," You started smiling eye-to-eye hopefully, "You mean, I could hire you back?" He said. "Yes, whatever. Just continuing this- whatever" you pointed at him, then back at you repeating his vigorously "whatever this is.", "Only under one condition, you being a little bossy duchess is not gonna be happening, I like the cool nerdy Y/n I saw at Yong's," He said, which you quickly fired back with 'I'm not a nerd!' You accept your mini defeat against Film Club boy, letting him know you need a ride home before anything. "Alright, get in."

"Wha-What are you doing?!" Mark asked, laughing so much he almost dropped to the floor. You invited him inside after he agreed to drop you off at home. "Making cookies duh!!" You cheer, grabbing all the chocolatey goods from the cabinet. He's quick to pull out his camera and hit record, "Welcome to my Y/n's baking show!" You sang, adding a  trumpet noise (with your mouth). "So, what's the new with you and Ryu?" You ask, sitting beside Mark diving into a very, very unhealthy mess you call a cookie, with Mark. "Nothing really, how are you and Jihoon." You sigh to look over at the spacious living room, Mark understands your silence and understands your having trouble in paradise. "How about I ask some of her band mates- who worship me. If they can ask Ryu to go on a date with you" You suggest to Mark with a soft smile. He looks at you, thoughtfully, "I got someone else on my mind nowadays..." He tells you with a crimson red colour visible on his cheeks. "I-I should get going now it's nearly ten." He says going to grab his things, you nod and walk towards the front door. Maybe some nerds are cool, you thought, before Mark went out. 

3 weeks. You've spent the last three weeks with Mark Lee. Getting to know him, documenting your- I mean our movie. He's been warming up to you, and you've been less of what he liked to call you; diva. You've started flaking out on some dates with the girls, just to film with Mark, you two have learnt more about him through the movie nights you spent over at your place after filming. He's really cool and you're grateful you stopped clowning around to know him.  Today you went over to Mark's place extra early since you wanted to give him a makeover. His dorky striped tees were getting old and you'd like to see him rock the nice clothes in his closet you knew he had. "Wear this, this and OH! Make sure to put these to use." You say handing him a pair of khaki pants, a yellow shirt, patch denim jacket and a beanie to wear. It was beautiful to see him actually clean up for once, he almost made you fall for his looks. "If Ryunjin doesn't ask you out, don't mind if I do," You said laughing "Aren't you too busy with Jihoon to look after me?" He said bluntly laughing before stopping to look for a reaction which was nowhere to be found, "Jihoon broke up with me because apparently, I'm a part of the geek team now!" You said chuckling, a hidden sadness underneath. "Hey, don't worry I've been a member of the geek squad for about my whole life I think we roll far better than rich snobs-", "Hey! Take that back I was one of them" You said punching his arm. "Don't worry you're good," He said laughing it off. To be honest his feelings for Ryunjin over the past few weeks have now shifted into distant memories after getting to know the real you. I think Mark's really been feeling lucky he's got you and he knows you're aware who he's got his eyes on now. You're parting his hand, in between his legs as he sits on the stool, his hands were sneaky to make their way to rest on your hips; you hum unaffected, but proceed to part it nice and neatly before ripping his hands from somewhere it shouldn't be.

It was D-Day. Spring Formal was no longer weeks away, it's hours. You had just recently gotten news that Mark's little documentary he's been making about and with you has won first place in the Annual Film Festival, due to this he had won the summer getaway to Hollywood film camp, which by the way, was exclusive. He was lucky, and he aspired and reached his goal like no other, you on the other hand... Let's just say Spring Formal Queen wasn't something you were looking forward to nowadays. But it did feel nice to win something at a party you didn't even bother to attend, you were too busy telling mark farewell at the airport to be at a function that was still being supervised by faculty. "Don't forget to text me, Mark," You tell the boy in front of you. Today Mark is sporting a red and black striped tee with an In The Row Leather Jacket (gifted by who else other than you!) and some dark blue jeans. "Can't believe you missed the fricken' Spring Formal to hang out with the film geek! Ah You really have evolved," He said standing in front of your hands reaching to nothing when he stuffs them in his jean pockets. "You make me sound like those Digimon characters you collect," You say ultimately making him facepalm at your words Digimon? Really Y/n? he thought before going into a fit of giggles, oh why should he correct you anyways you seem so cute."But no, I won't forget." He assures hand reaching out to rub your side. This time spent with Mark is something the old you would've retched at, but the current you? The current you are thankful, Mark helped you go back to your regular self, showing you that you didn't have to be some type of Barbie doll for some; what Mark called rich slobs. You were better than that now, and you had Mark. You've come to realize that Mark Lee isn't just that geek from the film club. He's above that. His place in your hear is indescribable. Who knew he would be the one to make your heart run laps from simple gestures. It's hilarious in a way, you'd be aggravated if he even came into your vicinity but now you'd be anticipating his visit.

"Mark," You start, watching his eyes light up at you call him. Your eyes meet, looking into one another's dark coffee bean orbs. Your gaze was sharp as if lined with shards of glass around the edges, his eyes. God, when your eyes met, you could see the glow in them, it was irresistible. That is when you finally realize, this newly discovered desire you found in yourself, is in Mark. He foresees your next moves bringing a hand up to your cheek, caressing it. "God, you're so beautiful," He whispers watching both of your arms trail up his torso to rest firmly on his shoulder. Leaning in, you finally taste his peach lips. His heart was racing, once he dipped his face down to you. He knew that once he places his soft pink lips on you, he wouldn't want to stop.  Breaking the kiss, you whisper, "Goodbye, Mark." Hand raising to ruffle his hair, "Make me proud out there," You tell him, leaving a less-heated peck on his lips. "Thank you, goodbye Y/n" He wanders off into his designated area before taking off almost immediately pulling his phone out. Is he really that addicted to elec- Oh, your phone rings. He's calling you, "I miss you already," he tells you the moment you answer. "I miss you too." You tell him. "I have to go, my Uber is here." you bit your lip, the words tangling up in the pit of your stomach, should you tell him the eight letters you've been longing to? "I love you, be safe." You look over the crowd to the seat to see him, looking for you. He brings the phone up back to his ear, "I love you too- Fuck so much," It looks like he's been waiting just as long.

Let's just say your happy ending took couple wrong turns but it looks like you finally reached your destination, in Mark's heart.

[oneweekoneband]

I’m slightly nauseous already with knowing I’m going to say this, but what does “self-awareness”  even mean? In modern parlance, as a descriptive phrase, as a comment on art? I’m asking in earnest, like, I’ve been Googling lately, which for me is basically on par with doctoral study in terms of academic rigor. The self is king, anyway, tyrant, so where is the line of distinction between material that intentionally is nodding at some truth about the artist’s life and what’s just, like, all the rest of the regular navel-gazing bullshit. I mean, I’m all self, I am guilty here. I can’t get it out of my poems or even make it more quiet. This is the tenth time I’ve invoked “I” in the space of six sentences. Processing art has always necessitated a certain amount of grappling with the creator, but the busywork of it lately grows more and more tedious. Joy drains out of my body parsing marks left behind not just in stylistic tendencies and themes, but in literal, intentional tags like graffiti on a water tower. This feels an age old and moth-holed complaint, dull, and I am no historian, or really a serious thinker of any kind. I’ve now complained at some length about self-referential art, but didn’t I love how Martin Scorsese nodded to the famous Goodfellas Copacabana tracking shot with the opening frames of last year’s The Irishman? Didn’t I find that terribly fun and sort of sweet? So there’s distinctions. I’m only saying I don’t know with certainty what they even are. I’m unreliable, and someone smarter than me has likely already solved my quandary about why self-knowledge often transforms into overly precious self-reflexivity in such a way that the knowledge is diminished and obscured, leaving only cutesy Easter eggs behind. Postmodernism has birthed a moralizing culture where art exists to be termed either “self-aware Good” or “self-aware Bad”.  Self-referentiality in media is so commonplace, so much the standard, that what was once credited as metatextual inventiveness often feels lazy now. In 1996, Scream was revitalizing a genre. Today, two thirds of all horror movies spend half their running time making sure that you know that they know they’re a horror movie, which is fine, I guess, except sometimes you just wanna watch someone get butchered with an axe in peace. 

This is all to say that in 2020 Taylor Swift looked long and hard upon her image in the reflecting pool of her heart and has written yet another song about Gone Girl.

“mirrorball” is a very good piece of Gone Girl —feels insane to tell anyone reading a post on a blog what Gone Girl is but, you know, the extremely popular 2012 novel about a woman who pretends to have been murdered and frames her husband for it, and subsequently the 2014 film adaption where you kinda see Ben Affleck’s dick for a second—fanfiction. It would be a fine song, a good song, really, even if it weren’t that, if it were just something normal and not unhinged written by a chill person who behaves in a regular way, but we need to acknowledge the facts for what they are. When Taylor Swift watched Rosamund Pike toss her freshly self-bobbed hair out of her face and hiss, “You think you’d be happy with some nice Midwestern girl? No way, baby. I’m it!” her brain lit up like a Christmas tree, and she’s never been the same. If you Google “taylor swift gone girl” there waiting for you will be a medium sized lake’s worth of articles speculating about how Gone Girl influenced and is referenced in past Swift singles “Blank Space” and “Look What You Made Me Do”. This is not new behavior, and if anything it’s getting a bit troubling to think that it’s been this long since Taylor’s read another book. Still, while the prior offerings were a fair attempt at this particular feat of depravity, “mirrorball” has brought Taylor’s Amy Elliott Dunne deification to stunning new heights. And most importantly, Taylor has done a service to every person alive with more than six brain cells and a Internet connection by putting an end to the “Cool Girl” discourse once and for all. By the power invested in “mirrorball”, it is hereby decreed that the Cool Girl speech from Gone Girl is neither feminist or antifeminist, not ironic nor aspirational. No. It’s something much better than all that. It’s a threat. I ! Can ! Change ! Everything ! About ! Me ! To ! Fit ! In !

Gone Girl (2012) by Gillian Flynn

“mirrorball” (2020) by Taylor Swift

When the twinkly musical stylings of Jack Antonoff, a man I distinctly distrust, but for no one specific reason, whirl to life at the beginning of this song I feel instantly entranced, blurry-brained and pleasure-pickled like an infant beneath a light-up crib mobile or, I guess, myself in the old times, the outside times, three tequila sodas deep under the disco lights at The Short Stop. Under a mirrorball in my head. I know very little about music, as a craft, and I really don’t care to know more. I’m happy in a world of pure, dumb sensation. I’m not even sure what kind of instruments are making these jangly little sounds. I just like it. I am vibing. We may not ever be able to behave badly in a club again, but I can sway to my stupid Taylor Swift-and-the-brother-of-the-lady-who-makes-like-those-sweatshirts-with-little-sayings-or-like-vulvas-which-famous-white-women-wear-on-instagram-you-know-what-I-mean song, pressing up onto my tiptoes on the linoleum tile of our kitchen floor and can feel for a second or two something approaching bliss. “mirrorball” is a lush sound bath that I like a lot and then also it’s about being all things to all people, chameleoning at a second’s notice, doing Oscar worthy work on every Zoom call, performing the you who is good, performing the you who is funny, performing the you who draws a liter of your own blood and throws it around the kitchen then cleans it up badly all to get your husband sent to jail for sleeping with a college student... Too much talk about making and unmaking of the self is way too, like, 2012 Tumblr for me now, and I start hearing the word “praxis” ring threateningly in my head, but I’m not yet so evolved that I don’t feel a pull. Musings on the disorganized self—on how we are new all the time, and not just because of all the fresh skin coming up under the dead, personhood in the end so frighteningly flexible—are always going to compel me, I’m afraid, but that goes double for musings on the disorganized self which posit that Taylor Swift still thinks Amy Dunne made some points.

Because on “mirrorball” Taylor is for once not hamfistedly addressing some “hater”, in the quiet and the lack of embarrassing martyrdom it actually offers an interesting answer to the complaint that Taylor is insufficiently self-aware. This criticism emerges often in tandem with claiming to have discovered some crack in the chassis of Swift’s public self, revealing the sweetness to be insincere. My instinct is to dismiss this more or less out of hand as just a mutation of the school of thought that presumes all work by women must be autobiography. And, regardless, it is made altogether laughable by the fact that anyone actually paying attention has known since at least Speak Now, a delightful record populated by the most appalling, horrible characters imaginable, and all of them written by a twenty year old Taylor Swift, that this woman is a pure weirdo. To accuse Taylor Swift of lacking in self-awareness is a reductive misunderstanding, I think, of artifice. Being a fake bitch takes work. Which is to say, if we agree that her public self is a calculated performance—eliding the fact that all public selves are a performance to avoid getting too in the weeds yadda yadda— why, then, should it be presumed that performance is rooted in ignorance? Would it not make more sense that, in fact, someone able to contort themselves so ably into various shapes for public consumption would have a certain understanding of the basic materials they’re working with and concealing? Taylor Swift, in a decade and a half of fame, has presented herself from inside a number of distinct packages. The gangly teenager draped in long curls like climbing wisteria who wrote lyrics down her arms in glitter paint gave way to red lipstick, a Diet Coke campaign, and bad dancing at awards shows. There was the period where she was surrounded constantly by a gaggle of models, then suddenly wasn’t anymore, and that rough interlude with the bleached hair. The whole Polaroid thing. Last year she boldly revealed she’s a democrat. Now it’s the end of the world and she’s got frizzy bangs and flannels and muted little piano songs. Perhaps this endless shape-shifting contradicts or undermines, for some, the pose of tender authenticity which has remained static through each phase, but that doesn’t mean she hasn’t been doing it all on purpose the entire time. I’ve never been a natural, all I do is try, try, try...

In the Disney+ documentary—which, in order to watch, I had to grudgingly give the vile mouse seven dollars, because the login information that I’d begged off of my little sister didn’t work and I was too embarrassed to bring it up a second time—Taylor referred to “mirrorball” as the first time on the album where she explicitly addressed the pandemic, referring to the lyrics that start, “And they called off the circus, Burned the disco down,” and end with “I’m still on that tightrope, I’m still trying everything to get you laughing at me,” which actually did made me laugh, feeling sort of warmly foolish and a little fond, because it never would have occurred to me that she was trying to be literal there. I suppose we really do all contain multitudes. Hate that.

[aion-rsa]

Back to the Future: The Real Johnny B. Goode Rocked Long Before Marty McFly

https://ift.tt/2QFxici

Back to the Future is a classic comedy, one of the most popular films in motion picture history. Almost every laugh line lands with a perfectly executed punch. Every skateboard flip is a motion picture wonder. It’s one of those films which is broadly silly yet still has heart, and it’s a treasure of commercial cinema. But when Michael J. Fox’s Marty McFly straps on a cherry red Gibson ES-345 he plunders the golden oldies right out of the fingers of the true original. Ignore the bit where “Marvin Berry” calls his cousin on the phone. Chuck Berry didn’t just write “Johnny B. Goode,” he was Johnny B. Goode. 

The song about the country boy who could play guitar like ringing a bell could have referred to any number of musicians, from Buddy Holly to Bo Diddley or Ricky Nelson. But the singer-songwriting guitarist who penned the line was born at 2520 Goode Avenue, in St. Louis.

Berry had already made his concession to white commercialism by changing the line “that little colored boy could play” to “that little country boy.” Oh my. But then for years, the Father of Rock and Roll watched the self-styled King of Rock and Roll, Elvis Presley, put his stamp on Berry’s signature. The royalties were sweet though for Berry, and the respect was mutual.

But the backhanded homage in the time-traveling 1985 comedy is really a cheap gag, and the joke is at the expense of Berry’s legacy.

“Long Distance information? Get Me Memphis, Tennesse”

“Chuck! Chuck, it’s Marvin, your cousin, Marvin Berry. You know that new sound you’re looking for?” the fictional bandleader yells into a pay phone at the 1955 Enchantment Under the Sea dance in Hill Valley, California. “Listen to this!”

We then hear the subtle sound of casual racial invalidation. Not only does the line denigrate Berry’s contribution to the architecture of rock and roll; it completely sidelines guitarist Carl Hogan who initiated the opening guitar phrasing on Louis Jordan’s 1946 pre-rock and roll song “Ain’t That Just Like a Woman.” Think, McFly. Think!

Michael J. Fox already has a perfectly winning comic ending to the now-iconic scene: when his fingers stretch back to the future, and he channels Eddie Van Halen on the guitar, even the kids at the 1950s dance think he should act his age. So why does director and co-screenwriter Robert Zemeckis feel the need to shit on Chuck Berry with such a disposable throw-away gag? It is even more insulting when you take into consideration who Berry had to sue over the course of his career for stealing his riffs.

Indicative of a long-standing music industry tradition, the two biggest names in white rock and roll, the Beatles and the Beach Boys, had to cough up to the pioneering artist after infringing on his copyrights. Berry sued to get his name on the Beach Boys’ hit “Surfin’ USA” while John Lennon agreed to cover two songs owned by Berry’s publisher in exchange for copping lines from “You Can’t Catch Me” for the song “Come Together.”

But Lennon still declared “If you tried to give rock and roll another name, you might call it ‘Chuck Berry,’” when he introduced him on The Mike Douglas Show in 1972. “In the 1950s, a whole generation worshipped his music, and when you see him today, past and present all come together, and the message is Hail, Hail Rock and Roll.’”

He Could Play a Guitar Just Like a-Ringin’ a Bell

Berry was the first-ever Rock & Roll Hall of Fame inductee, and in the same class as James Brown, Ray Charles, Fats Domino, the Everly Brothers, Buddy Holly, Jerry Lee Lewis, and Presley. With songs like “Maybellene,” “Roll Over Beethoven,” “Little Queenie,” “Havana Moon,” “Wee Wee Hours,” “Rock and Roll Music,” and “Sweet Little 16,” Berry scored the soundtrack to the 1950s.

Berry didn’t invent rock and roll. Ike Turner is credited with that for his 1951 song, “Rocket 88.”  Berry recorded his first hit “Maybellene” in 1955 at Chicago’s Chess Studios, the home of the blues. Berry sped up the blues to a country thump and let his fingers do to guitar strings what lips did to horns.

Berry made rock and roll fun, funny, and subtly rebellious. The teenager in “You Can’t Catch Me” is motorvating away from the cops. His “Brown Eyed Handsome Man” hit a home run with color coded racial pride. The artist who was glad, so glad, he was “living in the U.S.A.” (in the song “Back in the U.S.A.”) was barred from many of the things he found so wondrous in this country to sing about.

Almost Grown

Charles Edward Anderson Berry was born on Oct. 18, 1926. His St. Louis neighborhood, “The Ville,” was segregated. His great-grandparents were slaves. In 1944, Berry was arrested for driving along in an automobile he carjacked at gunpoint after robbing three stores in Kansas City. He did a three-year stint in reform school.

Berry began playing music professionally when he was in his mid-20s, sitting in with local bands like piano player Johnnie Johnson’s group, Sir John’s Trio. Blues icon Muddy Waters suggested Berry bring his songs to Chess Records where Howlin’ Wolf, the Moonglows, and Big Bill Broonzy were recording sides. Label owner Leonard Chess had a good feeling about the song “Ida Red.” 

Read more

Movies

The History of Back to the Future Began With a High School Yearbook

By Chris Cummins

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The United States vs. Billie Holiday: The Federal Bureau of Narcotics Was Formed to Kill Jazz

By Tony Sokol

Berry renamed the song “Maybellene” when he recorded it on May 21, 1955. It was Berry’s first nationwide hit. He was 28. Willie Dixon was on bass, Johnnie Johnson played piano, Jerome Green shook maracas, and Ebby Hardy beat the drums. Alan Freed and Russ Fratto didn’t do anything for the song, but their names are on the credits as co-songwriters. They effectively collected royalties for teaching Berry a valuable lesson.

Chuck Berry wrote all the songs on his first album, After School Session, which was released in May 1957. It was the same for his next two albums. Berry didn’t include any covers on his albums at all until his fourth album, Rockin’ at the Hops, released in July 1960. Berry starred in some of Alan Freed’s jukebox movies like Rock Rock Rock!, Mister Rock and Roll, and Go, Johnny, Go! He also appeared in Jazz on a Summer’s Day, a 1959 documentary about the Newport Jazz Festival.

“No Need to Be Complainin’, My Objections Overruled”

Berry was arrested in St. Louis, Missouri, in December 1959 for transporting Janice Norine Escalan, a 14-year-old hatcheck girl at Club Bandstand in Juarez, Mexico, across state lines for “immoral purposes.”  He was charged under the Mann Act. Berry argued he was offering legitimate employment. An all-male, all-white jury found him guilty on March 11, 1960. Berry appealed, but the conviction was upheld at a 1961 trial. Berry was sentenced to three years. He served 18 months and was released from prison in 1964.

Berry’s career never quite took off again. He had some hits in 1964 and 1965, “Nadine,” “No Particular Place to Go,” “You Never Can Tell,” and “Promised Land.” He was one of the artists in the 1964 concert film The TAMI Show. Berry’s last number 1 hit, “My Ding-a-Ling,” was recorded live in London in 1972 for The London Chuck Berry Sessions album.

Berry never stopped playing live. He traveled with only his guitar and a briefcase for his money, and would grab local bar bands to back him when he hit town. Everyone knew Chuck Berry songs. Simple, three-chord pangs to teenage love, cars and safety belts. Bandleaders like Bruce Springsteen and Steve Miller eagerly lent their fingers and bands to the light traveling guitar player. Most groups were thrilled to get the chance to play for a legend when they weren’t harangued for bending a string too far on an intro. Not even Keith Richards got away with that, just watch the rehearsal portion of the 1987 documentary Hail! Rock ‘n’ Roll.

The Rolling Stones’ guitarist had already been brought in as a surprise backing player for a 1972 Los Angeles show where he was kicked off the stage for setting his amp too loud. Berry would also give Richards a black eye for touching his guitar after a New York City show a decade later. Richards’ early guitar work is modeled on Berry’s style. The Stones covered “Carol,” “Around and Around” and “You Can’t Catch Me.” Richards inducted Berry into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 1986.

Back to the Future is really just a light, inoffensive, time-bending screwball comedy, and Berry has been the butt of far worse jokes. Spy magazine alleged Berry secretly filmed women in bathrooms. In January 1990, High Society claimed to be “the only magazine with the balls to show Chuck’s berries,” when it published photos of him posing nude with different women.

So when you read an article about Berry recalling the incident where the white kid played “Johnny B. Goode,” remember: it ran in The Onion. Chuck Berry could be accused of a lot of things, but he was an original.

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[sapphiccritique]

Character study plus observations of lesbophobic and misogynistic online discourse on LIHKG with regards to a queer JAV porn-star

SapphicCritique here again. Today, I would like to introduce an awesome queer celebrity to you and be a killjoy and rant about what I find to be troubling lesbophobic and misogynistic online discourse on LIHKG in a discussion thread of running commentary on Shiina Sora’s performance in her newest films. I am not going to expose the usernames of these forum participants, but I am going to quote some of them in this blog.

Shiina Sora is this hot JAV porn-star who came out as a lesbian ciswoman in the year 2013. She is open about her sexual orientation and her personal love life and even produced a series of real-life sex documentary called ‘Bibians’ with her ex-girlfriend (then girlfriend) in the years 2013-2015, making her a pioneer as the first gay woman to come out in the industry in Japan and the first star to produce a real-life sex documentary with her actual lover. Her godly status in the industry is seen in her title, the female version of Taka Kato the Adult Films King (unrelated: why is the male version unmarked and the female marked?) Her performance in adult films is subversive due to her queer identity and high acceptance of different forms of sex. She is supportive of queer rights and sex-positivity, and she is also an active fighter on the front of dispersing AIDS-related attacks on the gay community. She is also known for her genderfucking performance as an occasional casual drag king and a woman penetrating man in some of her films.

(Shiina Sora with her signature pose, with the same name as her self-dubbed title, the god of Teman [fingering in Japanese])

The discussion thread I meant to discuss here shows the construction of gender ideals on digital media through a homosocial, misogynistic and heteronormative discourse. Namely, it is an online co-construction and re-articulation of the tough masculinity ideal which involves homophobic slurs and sexual objectification of women as vile bodies. It is needless to say I was very mad and dumbfounded to see some forum participants of LIHKG take this female subject who is queer and assumed agency through her openness about sex out of context and objectify her as merely “the sex” and the queer other, and proceed to talk about conquering this “unattainable prize” in the language of rape culture. I believe that online discourse and social reality are co-dependent and what we talk or hear about online affects how we think and act in real life. Therefore, it is highly meaningful for us to always question how online discourse is shaped in such a way that it both informs and re-articulates gender ideals both online and in real life.

Some of what these forum participants said brought my attention to their alarming lesbophobia and how it is vastly different from homophobia charged towards gay men. Some of the forum participants said and I quote, “Fucking a pretty tomboy is THE dream. Fuck her so hard until she turns fucking straight.” “Since she admitted to the public what her sexual orientation is, it makes it that much more exciting to jerk off to her films.” “Cunt’s fucking unwilling face when she’s getting fucked… like it is I who is fucking her out of her mind and reverting her into a damn normal woman.” It seems significant that this kind of “conversion by sex” criticism is phallocentric, and I seldom hear of criticism of male-identified homosexual people in the same manner. I wonder if it has to do with the notions of the penis as powerful and the man as the conqueror. In this discussion thread, I also catch some hints of gay-suspecting in the forum participants. Some are dissatisfied that one of them found Shiina’s gender performance of ‘female masculinity’ hot and subjugated him to gay-shaming, insinuating that maybe he “wanted to be fucked by her wearing a strap-on dildo” and was latently gay, thereby not belonging there with them. I wonder if these two ideas are conflicting, or if they are two facets of one tough masculinity ideal. Why in the homosocial interaction, the majority of the participants policed dealignment from heterosexual masculinity through a homophobic discourse? Why did one person’s dealignment harm the group’s heterosexual masculinity?

The group-dynamics in this online locker-room talk is so strange when I notice that both online and in real life, some men tend to boast of their sexual conquests (or made-up sexual conquests) and that it is strictly homosocial yet universal, almost as if they either want or need to massage their and each other’s egos by upholding this façade under some kind of peer pressure. It is deeply troubling that they do not see (or they knowingly ignore) the misogyny in this behaviour. I seldom find women doing this. I think I first became aware of this kind of behaviour when reading Deborah Cameron’s blog, language: a feminist guide, where she noted that nearly all men partake in misogynistic conversation to uphold a kind of strictly heterosexual masculinity and foster heterosexual homosociality, to distance themselves from any doubt that they could be homosexual and thereby not masculine. This leads me to ponder the heterosexual matrix proposed by Judith Butler in Gender Trouble, where sex shapes gender and then shapes desire, and all of them work in tandem with each other such that each one affirms or negates the other. If you are born with a penis, you are a guy and you love women. Contradicting one of these three notions will disqualify the other two. As such, a man who loves another man is not ‘masculine’, and thus is ‘less than’ a man. (huge urgh) In this thread, it seems that it is imperative for these ‘straight cismen’ to appreciate and police Shiina’s body in a misogynist conquering manner while putting down any dissenting gender performance (such as appreciating Shiina’s manliness) lest it harms the masculinity of the whole.

Another thing that I deem worth looking into is the conflicting desire that the forum participants voice out in the thread. On one hand, they seemed to enjoy criticizing the Shiina’s body and her performance, comparing her to the mainstream porn-star persona. On the other hand, they value her uniqueness and unattainable status, claiming it makes her hotter. This is shown when they argued that as a “tomboy”, she is very hot because “tomboys” are “unattainable” (by men) in real life. At the same time, some of them argued that she can’t be a real lesbian and must instead be a bisexual woman (and must be by deduction “attainable”) (as if women are objects to be acquired) (huger ugh). Why is an ‘unattainable’ female person both more appealing and less appealing to them?

Yet another mystery bigger than the discussion thread itself is the thread’s oddity in the forum. Although LIHKG users often joke that there are no “sisters” (female users) in the forum and all those whose user name is red (it can be either red or blue) are gay male users, not female users, they also good-naturedly joke that it is the largest local gay forum. They say so because there are often posts advocating for queer rights or promoting equality movements in Hong Kong, and when it is discussed as a big topic, it is more well-received than hated. But in this discussion thread, I see homophobia dominating and underlining a misogynistic discussion over a female body. I can’t help but wonder, where do participants draw the line? What makes the political queer matters serious and deserving support, but Shiina and her fans laughing stocks?

(meme with the caption: LIHKG The largest local gay forum)

I am probably reading too much out of what these men called ‘having a bit of fun’. But it is definitely not okay when it is at the expense of women or queer people. In fact, it is not okay on any person, and I am not merely being a killjoy when I problematize online discourse oozing in misogyny and lesbophobia. Online discourse and social reality are co-dependent and what we talk or hear about online always affects how we think and act in real life. Normalizing sexual objectification by letting it pass us by without comment is dangerous. We can never be too careful what we take in unconsciously and when we inadvertently help re-articulate ‘toxic’ gender ideals.

[presidentrhodes]

Spider-Man Far From Home spoilers

I just finished watching it and, honestly, I’d say it was a pretty good way to bid farewell to the first three phases of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. 

Spoilers under the cut. This is pretty long and rambly. 

1. Midtown high is supposed to be a school for geniuses but these little shits use comic sans in tribute videos and steal watermarked Getty Images pictures to put in them. I loved it, particularly with the song choice and the fact that Vision’s picture was from the Civil War airport standoff in Leipzig — that means only Peter could’ve provided it and no one bothered to ask how he got it. 

2. Tom Holland really wasn’t kidding when he said the film was a love letter to RDJ/Tony Stark. He was everywhere, his sacrifice was being recognised around the world: they even had a documentary on him, which was available in the in-flight entertainment, plus, there were murals and photographs in Venice and Prague. He was very much present throughout the film. 

3. EDITH. In a nutshell, it’s an augmented reality-enabled AI that controls a tactical and defensive system Tony built to protect Earth in the aftermath of his demise. Think Ultron’s perfect self minus the winning personality — EDITH controls a bunch of massive Stark Industries satellites in orbit that are equipped with thousands of weaponised drones. It can remotely target individual threats and take them out with simple voice commands. It also is able to connect to any network in the vicinity, so, Peter was able to see what his classmates were doing on their devices. 

I’ve already seen so many angry posts comparing EDITH to Project Insight without taking into account a) intent; and b) the reality of the MCU. Tony didn’t build EDITH for the same reason Zola built Project Insight. The former was meant to be a last or first line of defence, controlled by an Avenger Tony personally trusted. The latter was a means to subjugate the world population to Hydra’s will. 

All tech in the MCU is dangerous when it falls into the wrong hands — that’s why they’re called the wrong hands and why Steve once said the safest hands are their own. The supersoldier serum gave us Steve Rogers; it also gave us the Winter Soldiers, a bunch of dangerous, invincible highly-trained assassins. Pym particles gave us Ant-Man and the Wasp as well as time travel; it also gave us Yellowjacket, who immediately wanted to weaponise the tech. The Iron Man suit gave us Iron Man; but also gave us Iron Monger, who wanted to build an army of metal soldiers. Wakanda’s highly-advanced weapon systems were able to withstand a full-scale invasion from the Outriders, but those same weapons almost started a global war in Killmonger’s hands. Project Insight and Ultron showed us the bad side of AI; JARVIS, Vision, FRIDAY, Karen and EDITH, to an extent, showed us the good side of AI.

The point is, technology in the wrong hands will always be a bad thing yet people only seem to gripe about Stark tech while ignoring every other piece of advanced technology we’ve seen weaponized or misused. I wonder why. Since the MCU canonically isn’t made up of one big Luddite colony, there’ll always be new technology being developed and bad guys finding ways to abuse them. 

Just look at the holographic tech Mysterio designed while at Stark Industries. Even before he was fired, his ambitions were grander and afterwards, he weaponized it and willingly sent people to their dooms so that he could play a hero. When 16-year-old Peter Parker, MJ and Ned — literal children — found out the truth and Mysterio risked being exposed as a fraud, he actively tried to kill them. Mysterio beat the shit out of Peter and threw him in front of an incoming high-speed train, so, no, I don’t care if Tony Stark was mean to him by firing him, he was a piece of shit who tried repeatedly to kill a kid. 

Tony, meanwhile, spent $600+ million on the holographic tech to design B.A.R.F — a technology with some really promising applications in the MedTech sector to help people overcome their PTSD and trauma. That’s the fucking difference between a superhero and a supervillain.

Sure, EDITH also has massive privacy concerns. That’s on Tony, but after the Decimation, I think people have bigger problems to worry about than whether Peter Parker is snooping on their text messages. Ultimately, EDITH offers Peter, and whoever else is going to fill up the Avengers roster in the future, a plan B to strike the bad guys from a safe distance. I

4. Tony left Peter in charge of EDITH. Not the Avengers, not SHIELD, and definitely not the US Department of Defense — a fact that actually pissed off Mysterio. Tony left it in Peter’s hands because he knew Spider-Man took the meaning of responsibility far more seriously than he ever did. All those years ago, Peter told him if one could do the things he could, and they didn’t, and then the bad things happened, they happened because of them. And, honestly, if anyone deserves to have control over such a potentially dangerous piece of tech that can help in future battles, then it’s Peter — even more so than Tony. 

5. Again, Peter is 16 in this film and still coping with loss and trauma. He willingly gave controls of EDITH to Quentin because Mysterio had everyone fooled, including Nick Fury/Talos — they’re both highly experienced soldiers. Fooling them wouldn’t have been easy and Mysterio’s plan was extremely well thought-out and perfectly executed. Peter redeem himself in the end and takes back control of EDITH. 

6. Peter and MJ were super adorable. Spider-Man is the only franchise apart from Iron Man, where the secondary lead characters are allowed to grow without it all being about the main hero. MJ is allowed to explore her feelings for Peter and measure them against Brad’s affection. Ned is allowed to also grow in his character and be more than Spider-Man’s best friend/guy in a chair. 

7. Happy and May were also adorable.

8. Happy ruined a perfectly good bed of tulips just to rescue May’s nephew and give him the TLC/pep talk he needed after, again, Beck pushed Peter in front of a high-speed train that would’ve killed an ordinary person. 

9. Peter confusing ACDC with Led Zeppelin is the most Gen Z thing ever. Happy watched Peter design his own suit and it reminded him of the times he spent watching Tony tinker in his lab. You could feel Tony’s absence pretty viscerally in that scene on the jet. 

10. Peter tingle. Lol. 

11. Happy’s words about Tony were beautiful. He said something along the lines of, “Tony was my best friend. He second-guessed everything he did. He was a mess. But the one thing he didn’t second-guess was picking you.” That really furthered the Iron Dad Spider Son narrative.

12. Iron Zombie was the w o r s t thing ever. Again, Beck emotionally manipulated 16-year-old Peter Parker and said if Peter was any good, his mentor would still be alive just as he projected an illusion of a decaying Iron Man corpse attacking him. To give you a sense of how manipulative he really is, he told his guy in the chair that Peter’s blood will be on his hands because he had failed to report a missing drone part that MJ had discovered in Prague. 

13. Peter finally understanding that he doesn’t have to be the next Tony Stark or Iron Man. He just needs to be the next Spider-Man and Peter Parker. 

14. Peter choosing to safeguard EDITH. 

15. J. Jonah Jameson and J.K. Simmons. That is all. He’s the MCU equivalent of Alex Jones and I love him so much. I wonder if this means we’ll see Doctor Strange offer Peter his help to erase everyone’s memories about the reveal of his secret identity. 

16. Every Nick Fury scene automatically becomes 2000x funnier when you realize it’s Talos posing as Fury and 90% of the time, he has no idea what the fuck is going on and he’s just winging it as he goes along. Also, he was furious that he and his wife, as members of a shapeshifting species, were unable to detect Mysterio’s ruse. 

17. Mysterio was a douchebag. Apart from trying to kill actual kids because he feared they might expose him, he did nothing worthy of a hero. He was jealous and angry about Tony, and he wanted to usurp Iron Man without doing any of the hard work. He willingly put people in danger, was prepared to sacrifice people to make his actions seem more realistic and wanted to take credit for saving the day and preventing an Avengers-level catastrophe. I’ve already seen reviewers trying to sympathise with Mysterio, and his persistent attempts to kill a 16-year-old kid because Tony was apparently mean to him. 

18. And, no, Tony did not steal B.A.R.F tech from Mysterio as some review sites are claiming. The narrative is unreliable at best because we hear only Quentin’s point of view — the same Quentin who had been using his holographic tech to deceive people and put them in harm’s way because he wanted to shake the Queen’s hands or some misguided bullshit. He deserved to fired. Plus, he was a Stark Industries employee. Tech companies almost always own the patent to whatever tech you design or invent for them when you’re on their payroll. It’s how corporations work.

19. Tony quoted Henry IV to Fury when he told him to give EDITH to Peter and said Spidey wouldn’t get the reference (Heavy is the head that wears the crown) because it’s not Star Wars. It was a nice, poignant moment — made funnier when you realize that’s Talos in disguise, which means at some point, Fury had to have a conversation with him about Shakespeare and Star Wars. Someone pls write the fic. 

20. The most important thing is that this film actually tried to address the Decimation. Endgame pretended to gloss over it to give Gay Joe Russo his 15 minutes of fame. But this film actually started with May and Peter organizing an event to help the displaced. Pepper sent a huge check and apologized for not being able to make it in person. :( 

20a. I love Jake Gyllenhaal. I had expected Quentin to be a dramatic thot but he really brought a lot of depth to the character. 

Overall, I liked the film a lot more than I had anticipated. Some people are going to scrutinize this film to death to prove Tony was the ultimate MCU villain and, hey, if that’s the hill they choose to die on, I don’t really care. After 11 years and 23 films later, if they still think that Tony was the real villain all along, then nothing we say or Marvel does, will change their mind. 

Personally, I thought this film was a good send off to Tony, now that they’ve firmly established that Peter Parker/Spider-Man is going to be the new face of the MCU and will carry with him the Iron Man legacy. He wasn’t always right and a lot of his choices tended to backfire but, in the end, his motivations were good and he still went out as the man who saved the world. He, unlike Beck, or Vulture before him, never tried to kill a child, not even when he brought him to a parking lot brawl among friends. 

Now, if only Marvel can just leave Tony’s legacy alone and let Peter, and the rest of the MCU, thrive on its own instead of retconning established Iron Man lore to fit new narratives. 

[theparanormalperiodical]

The Conjuring (2013) True Story, And The 13 American Haunted Houses You Need To Know About

It’s been a busy week for haunted houses. And no, I’m not just talking about the popular Halloween activity.

Our favourite festivities often occur in mocked up haunted houses filled with sheets draped in a ghostly shape, ‘actors’ making their afterlife debut as various frightful creatures, and a fistful of sweets at the end of the night.

But it seems America’s obsession with the haunted house is about to take a much more cinematic - and realistic - turn.

Only recently did Ghost Hunting pro, Zak Bagans, continue his documented foray into the paranormal by filming a Halloween special in possibly one of the most haunted houses in the world:

The Perron Family Farmhouse in Rhode Island.

But it wasn’t necessarily the paranormal activity he claimed to have captured that intrigues me - it is what happened after filming ceased.

Following the visit, he claimed he faced 3 weeks of physical illness:

“It took everything out of me. My body isn't functioning right...haunted by something I believe is very ancient.”

The activity he captured features as the first time cameras have been permitted access to the 300 year old property in 15 years - but the haunting of the Perron family has by no means been ignored by popular culture.

One of the most striking horror films in recent years - The Conjuring - is based on the real life investigation conducted by paranormal dream-team Ed and Lorraine Warren.

So, when Zak Bagans followed in their footsteps, it catapulted the haunting back to our TV screens and presented more recent insight into this ever-still-haunted-house.

The activity captured by Bagans included a black mass blocking a window of the house, among other events that will be included in the documentary, of course.

The haunted house obsession don’t stop here, I’m afraid. 

The creative minds behind the original film have only in recent days laid claim to a similarly infamous haunted house - the Lalaurie Mansion. They seek to create a similar cinematic feature to that presented in  The Conjuring.

But it got me thinking: what was the true story behind The Conjuring?

And are there any other haunted houses in America that feature such #iconic hauntings? 

So, in today’s edition of The Paranormal Periodical, I’m going to recap The Conjuring, compare the film to the actual real-life investigation, and take a good ol’ American road trip to the other haunted houses on offer - including the Lalaurie Mansion.

Let’s get spooky!

Here’s A Recap Of The Conjuring

I’m not going to waste my time and recite the complete plot of The Conjuring universe. That will take two days, a bottle of gin, and a therapy session.

Regardless, the original film ties together many of the strands of the total universe, providing the cinematic circle that the horror genre is so famed for.

Basics, a famalam move into a farmhouse. And everything is hunky-dory - until the first morning. 

All the clocks have stopped at 3am, and the dog dies. 

No, it’s not a good start. 

Oh, and the dad finds a bordered up cellar which in all his wisdom he decides to open up again because it’s not like this is a horror film, right?

*Winks at camera*

And the creepy weird child finds an even creepier weird doll by the creepy weird tree which scars the cover photo used for the film!

Couple nights later, and supernatural shizz ensues, but this time spirits are telling the children that they want to kill their family, trapping the mother in the cellar, and physically attacking the living residents.

Following this they decide to be actual intelligent horror movie characters (OMG), and source help from renowned demonologists Ed and Lorraine Warren.

The demonologists investigate, and come to the simple conclusion that their house will need an exorcism.

But first, they need the Catholic Church to give them the thumbs up.

Having slipped into the Vatican’s DMs, they start reading up on the house, only to discover a twisted tale that torments the Perron family.

They trace the house to a woman named Bathsheba Sherman, a satanist/witch/general-demony-thing who is believed to be related to a witch in Salem. Having sacrificed her week old baby to the devil, she hung herself on the tree that figures so prominently in the film. 

Oh, and she died at 3am.

But briefly before hanging herself, she cursed all those who would take her land. That explains the high number of murders, suicides and drownings scattered across the land she once owned. 

To gather evidence prior to the exorcism, the Warrens and crew in tow (along with a sarky police officer) set up a variety of bells, cameras and other ways to capture evidence of the paranormal.

But when most of the famalam are out for ice cream, Carolyn ends up being fully possessed after Bathsheba vomits blood into her mouth.

I mean, I’d prefer the ice cream.

Paranormal things ensue featuring the past inhabitants who were possessed by Bathsheba.

Carolyn then takes two kids back to the house while in full-possessed-mode, and attempts to kill them in the cellar. She is stopped just in the nick of time (wow, how convenient) and the Warrens then decide that ‘yeah let’s not wait for a priest, let’s exorcise this biatch right meow’.

They then use a combination of sentimental reflection and the extremity of an exorcism to lift Bathsheba’s curse.

There we have it - the cinematic version of events!

Question is: how close is this to the actual events that took place?

The answer: uncomfortably close.

The Real Story Of The Perron Family Farmhouse

It was early January 1971 when the Perron family moved into their 14 room crib. And their new year was about to come in with a bang. 

Carolyn, the mother, and Roger, the father, noticed only small things at first. 

Maybe the broom would go missing when she wanted to sweep the kitchen floor, or maybe it would move from place to place? Or perhaps something would sound as if it was scraping against the kettle when nothing was there? And sometimes small piles of dirt would be found on the kitchen floor after it was clean...

Yet aside from the domestic-demonic issues, their five daughters witnessed activity that was a smidge more supernatural. 

Spirits would be seen around the house, and often were harmless. 

However, some were not so forgiving. 

Angry spirits were a feature of this farmhouse.

This activity mirrors the beginning of the film, perhaps on a more minimalist level - but a minor difference does strike with the following event:

It’s Carolyn that researches the history of the house, not the Warrens. 

But what she discovered sticks close to the basis of the film.

She discovered that the house had been in the same family for no less than 8 generations. Many of them has died in a frightful number of horrible circumstances, from drowning, to murders, to the occasional suicide. 

And a woman named Bathsheba features in the history of the actual house.

Bathsheba Sherman lived on the Perron’s property all the way back in the mid 19th century, and she was rumoured to be a satanist.

Among these rumours was one that claimed she was involved in the death of a neighbour’s child; there was even evidence of this!

From here the Perrons determined that the violent spirit was that of Bathsheba.

“Whoever the spirit was, she perceived herself to be mistress of the house and she resented the competition my mother posed for that position.” - Andrea Perron

It’s here that the close resemblance with the film intensifies.

Yay. 

The film makes out that Bathsheba is attacking/attempting to possess the mother, Carolyn, in order to kill her children as a sacrifice for the devil.

It is then revealed in the film that Bathsheba possessed all mothers that lived at the property to mirror these actions.

Could this have been the real Bathsheba’s aim?

Other reflections of the true story include the nature of the hauntings. 

Take the basement - the heating which was based in the basement would mysteriously fail, causing Roger to face the Perron’s fear of the basement, and venture down their to fix it.

And when Roger would come up from the basement, a rotting-smell would follow him up the stairs.

The same smells would move around the house. And their beds? They would rise up of the floor.

I mean, it’s just 0 to 100, isn’t it?

The final event that directly appears in the film is the possession of Carolyn Perron.

The Perrons stayed shacked up in this house for no less than 10 - yes, 10 - years, and the Warrens made many a visit. One of which involved a seance.

During the seance, Carolyn became possessed, speaking in tongues and rising up from the ground in her chair.

This features as a prominent scene in the film, but here ends the ‘based on a true story tagline’.

The Warrens did not perform an exorcism in the actual story, but claimed it must be performed by Catholic priests.

‘Based on a true story’ is a trope mocked by horror fans and horror haters alike, but this film clearly takes direct inspiration from the Warrens and their investigation.

And that is fucking terrifying. 

Are The Any Other Haunted Houses In America?

Yep. So many.

There’s no doubt that the haunted house is one of the most common tropes featured in horror films. And as The Conjuring is the ultimate flick for this topic, it’s likely that it took inspiration from the other landmarks pinned into the Land of The Free.

Let’s take a guided tour, then!

We start with a tale only too similar to the Perron family farmhouse.

No seriously, it’s terrible.

The Bell Witch Farm, nestled in humble Tennessee bears an uncomfortable resemblance to the story of Bathsheba: a woman named Kate Batts in the early 19th century believed that a neighbour had cheated her out of land. 

And so, lying on her deathbed, she swore she would haunt him forever!

She kept her promise. 

The Bell family often noted physical attacks from supernatural beings, heard chains being dragged across the floor and noises in their walls

They even saw strange looking animals on their farm, such as a dog with a rabbit’s head. This is a satanic image which is often played upon in horror films.

We continue our road trip with a haunted house that too has featured on the screen, but this time, it’s the TV - it’s the LaLaurie House in New Orleans. 

Sounds familiar? You’ve probably seen it on American Horror Story.

The story goes that this house belonged to Madame Delphine LaLaurie, a notorious serial killer who took pleasure in torturing and killing the slaves she kept from 1831 to 1834. 

It was only when a fire struck the house in 1834 that the torture chamber was revealed. 

When the authorities arrived, the slaves were found in all manner of ghastly positions:

One slave had her limbs broken in a manner that made her look like a crab.

Another had a hole drilled in their head and a wooden spoon sticking out of it (it is believed the brains were being stirred at the pleasure of the Madame of the house).

And another had their skin peeled off their back, revealing the bones and muscles underneath.

There are many more tales of the circumstances the slaves were found in, but I think we’ve heard enough...

When the reality behind the house was revealed, a mob of local citizens destroyed the residence, leaving only the walls intact.

The house has been closed off to the public since 1932, but in 2007 none other than the meme of Hollywood himself purchased it: Nicholas Cage. 

Yet the actor was not the only thing in residence at the LaLaurie mansion. Thanks to its past, shouts, moans, weeping and ghostly faces have been seen and heard coming from the house.

Even negative vibes is a common claim of visitors, as is hearing footsteps across the house.

A seance has been conducted at the house, and the medium immediately claimed that sadness and heavy emotion settled on her. She also claimed that the slaves who were tortured and murdered there had passed on, and no longer resided at the house.

Clearly, this house has a lot going on. And it’s this haunting that is next to be projected onto the silver screen.

That’s right: the creative minds behind The Conjuring have snapped up a new haunted house, and are developing a brand spanking new horror franchise based on the worst kept secret of Louisiana! 

In fact, they are hoping to reside in that mansion to write the screenplay and shoot the film.

Next up, we have the Sallie House.

It is claimed that a botched Appendectomy once occurred here, and the victim - a little girl - is what stirs the supernatural seen in this house.

The paranormal activity was reported by a small family that moved there back in the 1990s, and the intense attacks and torments were believed to come from this little girl named Sallie.

And the supernatural is off the charts.

I’m talking full bodied apparitions, EVPs echoing the voices of men, women and children, flying objects, items moving and turning up somewhere else...

And if that wasn’t enough, scratching at the walls, loud thumps of phantom furniture, and strong smells all feature within the haunting of this house.

Those that have gone onto investigate this has been touched by the paranormal themselves: burns, scratches, cuts - these physical attacks are common here. 

Many a medium have also attempted to understand the house, including Peter James who worked on the Queen Mary, one of the most famous haunted buildings in the world.

It has actually been deduced that the attacks centre on men; it is claimed that the surgery on Sallie was done by a male doctor in 1905, and she never forgave him, attacking all men who enter the house in vengeance. 

We now turn to the Villisca Axe Murder House.

No points for guessing what happened here...

Back in 1912, a family of six was bludgeoned to death with an axe. Each family member had severe wounds to the head, and one of the young daughters was found with a defensive injury on her arm and half-naked, suggesting attempted rape or assault.

The crime to this day has been left unsolved.

And the house? Empty.

No running water, and no electricity - apart from the odd paranormal fanatic who pays a hefty price to spend the night.

After the investigation, it was concluded that the killer waited in the attic with a cigarette until it was the time to strike.

And it was Josiah - the patriarch of the family - who met the worst fate. The attacker used the blade on him, leaving him with wounds in this face so severe that they couldn’t find his eyes!

The rest of the family were bludgeoned with the blunt end of the axe. 

The house was restored in 1994, but it was prior to this that the main paranormal activity has been cited. 

Former tenants have seen a man with an axe at the end of their bed who moves across the room in the dead of the night.

They have even been seen running out of the house screaming by the neighbours!

The tenants have also come back to their house to see their belongings strewn across the floor, and one has even felt a wrist on his hand which forced a knife into his hand.

And they wouldn’t be the first person to be attacked in the house; one paranormal investigator stayed overnight to investigate the goings on, and had stabbed himself by morning. 

EVPs have also been used to document the hauntings, often recording references to the murders themselves. Sounds of an axe swinging, references to the six that were found dead, and even the name ‘Andy’ in reference to the murderer cropped up, informing this as a key haunted house.

We now park up at the House of Death. 

And its name is deserved. 

Brimming with 22 ghosts, this is one of the most infamous buildings in New York. But it still serves a famous bunch of residents.

Mark Twain is one of the most ghosts that once lived here, and still haunts his former residency. Another ghost is confirmed to be that of a young girl who was beaten to death of her father,

Indeed, some ghosts aren’t even human! A grey cat is a regular roamer of the House of Death.

Okay real talk - how would you know if a ghost cat is a ghost cause like lets say its a victorian child this bitch be looking victorian but a cat that just wanders around looking sarky and fucking off for long periods of time just be a cat. 

Next up is the Lizzie Borden House.

The main ghost of this house - Lizzie Borden is still claimed to be laughing about murdering her stepmother and father via axe back in 1892.

Yet Borden is not the only entity still residing in this Massachusetts-based house; her victims still stalk the land, and a maid screaming for help is also often seen.

These sightings are mainly witnessed by the guests who visit the house hoping for a scare. 

We now turn to a house that has been at the centre of its own horror film, just like The Conjuring.

Unfortunately, this film was rather more disappointing. 

The Winchester House belonged to the wife of a man who developed one of the most popular guns of the era. Having lost her husband and young daughter, she consulted a spiritualist who told her the house was haunted by each and every victim of the guns.

Native Americans, Civil War soldiers and the other victims had haunted the house built on the empire of the weapon. 

The spiritualist then recommended Winchester move and use her hefty inheritance ($20 million!) to build a home and appease the spirits.

From 1884 to 1922, a labrinth totalling 160 rooms was built, with corridors often leading guests to nowhere. 

Next up is the Joshua Ward House. Built in historic Salem, this house was built for Sheriff George Corwin.

A major figure in the Salem witch trials, he lived, died and was buried here. So it’s no wonder that he still haunts the location!

But this haunting doesn’t just involve some bloke wandering the grounds and chatting shit about some witch-hunt (sound like American politics, if you’re asking me...).

This bloke is often rumoured to choke visitors to the house - this comes from Corwin being known as ‘the strangler’, a name descended from his favoured execution method for witches.

Even his victims have been spotted!

A dishevelled witch has been seen in a picture taken by a realtor wishing to sell the property on.

And I doubt that picture made a positive impression…

The final feature-film haunted house inspired the flick Haunting in Connecticut.

Great film; spooky house!

In the 1980s, the Snedeker family witnessed some serious haunting in their funeral-home turned family home. 

Across two short years, the parents claimed they were physically assaulted and raped by demonic spirits. And their son was too visited by a spirit - a creepy man with long black hair.

The most recent family claim that their house is spirit-free, but it’s the fame of this house that currently is haunting the residents:

Frequent visits by paranormal fanatics have even caused the police to set up routine patrols to protect the residents.

We continue our road-trip in the Los Feliz Murder Mansion in sunny LA.

In 1959, Dr Harold Perelson murdered his wife with a hammer, attacked his daughter with the same weapon, and then killed himself with a glass of acid. 

The rumours of haunting might be difficult to source, but this hasn’t stopped paranormal fanatics from trooping to the house and having a gander ‘round the grounds. 

Years later, it was purchased by a family for storage purposes, and finally in 2016 it was cleared of the junk dating back to 2016. And most of it hadn’t moved since the murder that still haunts this property!

We follow up this murder with a much more en masse set of deaths.

The Farnsworth House Inn in Gettysburg is a remnant of the history that the USA has been subject to. 

The inn is currently used as a restaurant to celebrate the history of the Civil War with waiters clad in civil war er-costume.

But what really accentuates the authenticity is the real confederate soldiers seen on the grounds! 

The inn was once used as a hospital for the South’s soldiers after the war, and the hundreds of bullet pocks concealed into the walls confirm that it’s not just the injured that will haunt the grounds of this historic site.

Our final haunted house contains a figure who featured prominently within cinematic history: the only and only Molly Brown.

If you’ve been asleep since 1997, then you’ll have missed the Unsinkable Molly Brown in Titanic as played by the one and only Kathy Bates!

And the Unsinkable Molly Brown has her very own haunted house!

She was one of the few survivors of the Titanic, and eventually died in New York in 1932.

Following her death, it is said that she haunted the Victorian home she shared with her husband and mother, and it has now become a museum brimming with the items she once owned throughout her life.

From apparitions in the dinings room, to rearranged furniture; from moving objects to apparitions in the room of her child (who just so happened to die at a young) - this haunted house stays firmly within the past.

We finish our road trip in Virginia, and thank god we do!

(We are running low on gas.)

(I am also terrified.)

 Welcome to the Ferry Plantation house! Fit to burst with 11 spirits, you can encounter the passengers of s ship-wrecked ferry, a former slave, and even a witch!

Grace Sherwood was accused of being a witch back in the 18th century, but her favoured haunting is less paranormal and more puppy-dog.

Yep, you can hear her call for her dog, Tobias!

So: do you fancy visiting any of these haunted houses?

And are you sure you want to rewatch The Conjuring?

Fact is, it’s the reality behind the monsters, demons, haunts, and horrors that makes those tales the films tell quite so terrifying...

[tokendisastergay]

Quarantine Diary, lovingly referred to as quarantime: (this is 100% for me to look back on and remember how i spend my time when left to my own devices, also hopefully so i am slightly productive in a day)

DAY ONE: I think I might lose my mind. This morning I got a new game for myself and spent a good portion of the day playing that. I also taught myself the beginning of Halloween from Rent on piano. At night I really started to lose it and watched a full lengtg documentary on foreign surrogacy. As of now I go back to school on the 31st

DAY TWO: I’m not sure I’ll survive for two weeks, but much less a whole month. School got pushed back to April 15th. Help me. I once again spelt an embarrassing amount of my day playing two separate games I’ve just started. I also taught myself most of Johnny Can’t Decide from Tick Tick Boom on piano, however since my wrist is broken and Jonathan Larson has abnormally long fingers some of the chords posed a minor challenge. It was also Saint Patrick’s day, so my dad put on Irish punk music for my baby brother (and us) and we made cabbage, fake corn beef because we’re vegetarian, and french fries because the store didn’t have potatoes in any other form.

DAY THREE: Having a sense of time is only a distant memory. I’m running low on lucky charms. My herbs did sprout this morning though so that was pretty thrilling. I taught the baby what noise the cow makes. Spoiler: it was moo. Me and my dad made veggie burgers, and then had our first tabletop game night in months. (We used to do it every thursday, but we’ve been way too busy for that recently).

DAY FOUR: I wasn’t sure if this belonged in yesterday’s or not but technically it was this morning because it was so late at night, but I officially got the first scene of the screenplay I’m currently writing done! I’m writing it specifically for a film festival for short films, and I only really have one *very long* scene left!! I woke up, and immediately took a nap because it was like 6. I cooked me and the baby breakfast and then composed a whole two measures for the score. Currently playing the “sit on the kitchen floor and fake sip unopened gatorade, and then say “ahhhh”” game. (after i wrote this I also went for a run, i ran a sub thirty minute three miles!)

DAY FIVE: animalcrossinganimalcrossinganimalcrossinganimalcrossing also I drew Cthulhu (I end every one of my sketchbooks with a Cthulhu, perhaps I will post my first Cthulhu vs most recent Cthulhu) I also ran way too aggressively yesterday because I am Sore.

DAY SIX:

very little change. Piano, animal crossing, etc. I did listen to A Chorus Line today; I got really into A Class Act, which is a show about Edward Kleban, the dude who wrote A Chous Line’s life. I remember listening to that in the car with my dad when I was really little, but then again I remember listening to Book of Mormon with him around then as well, so it probably wasn’t the best way to judge what the show was going to be like. (Fun fact my dad also took me to see Book of Mormon when I was 11!) But I also know my grandmother really likes it and so I just thought it’d be a little more Watch With Your Grandma Friendly. It was not. Not like,, super inappropriate just not what I was expecting

DAY SEVEN:

Again, I’ve learned I only have so many activities. I’m trying really hard to think of another idea for my screenplay, since there is absolutely no way for me to get enough middle aged people to film the one I was planning. I was also on call with my bf for four hours straight today so that was fun

DAY EIGHT:

Worst day by far. I didn’t do much of anything, and I feel really guilty about how little I got accomplished. That’s about it.

DAY NINE:

Got a lot accomplished!!! I organized my whole desk (which, for context towards the end I was getting to things from 2014, that’s how big of a job this was) I also started my vocab for one of my classes, and I set up my journal for next month! I thought I’d start using it a little more since I have nothing else to do, plus updating this every day has hopefully gotten me back into the habit of actually using something daily.

DAY TEN

Okay honestly it’s been a minute since I updated this so I don’t really remember what I did,, but I’ll use this day to define what I’ve been doing daily. I’m pretty sure I haven’t say yet, but I’ve been stretching every day. I used to be a very serious gymnast, but I got to the point where essentially I had to choose between attending public school, or continuing with gymnastics, and like the average parent of a twelve year old, my dad was not about to let me stop going to school for something I physically couldn’t keep doing past my mid twenties. But I really miss having any control over my body, so I’ve decided I’m commiting to trying to gain back a little flexibility. It drives me crazy, I do theater obviously and the fact I’m such a mediocre dancer now is not doing good things for my ego

DAY ELEVEN

DAY TWELVE

DAY THIRTEEN

DAY FOURTEEN

I ran pretty well today. Sub nine minute miles, not super speedy, but fast for me at least. I mean I ran two miles in close to 15 minutes, so if I can do that for another mile I’d PR my 5k time for sure. Other than that, I procrastinated my speech, but I did get a bit of it done tonight on call with my boyfriend

DAY FIFTEEN

The speech was really eating me up. In an effort to ignore it I blew through 200 pages worth of a book today. I had a call for my acting class from 5:30-8:30, and I’m kinda looking forward to some of the stuff we’re doing in there. I start school again tomorrow and I have never been so excited for school to start back up in my life (and I’m never particularly unhappy; I quite enjoy the first week of a new school year)

DAY SIXTEEN

So school was kinda a dud. The website couldn’t support every kid in the county trying to get on it at once so it just,,, didn’t work. I spent most of the day filming my speech and I’m superrrr proud of it (I love giving speeches with all my heart, I go so overboard when we get assigned them for school though, no one else put as much effort into theirs as I did)

DAY SEVENTEEN

I got all of my class work for the week done, except for one class that isn’t doing it the way the rest of mine are. Don’t really remember what else happened today

DAY ???: I got my last two lab reports done. Also it was easter, so we hid eggs for the baby and looked longingly at the Easter egg bread we made (half jewish half italian, an unfortunate combination during Passover) Got my three hour mandates boyfriend call in and we looked at early humans and what we evolved from. Turns out I hate looking at that shit and I think Lucy will never leave the realm of my mind

DAY ???: Not a super interesting one but a good one. I filmed a monologue for my long form improv class, and did it on my Fancy Filmmaking Camera, which was completely unnecessary but very fun. We did have to deal with some legal stuff that I both don’t feel comfortable sharing and don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable with. I had acting class, and that was absolutely it. Today my boyfriend and I talked about how shitty cops are, and his adventures in growing vegetables

[suckasstakenames]

Craig and Those Guys Week: Day 5 - Sleepover 💤 🎮

The third and final oneshot I wrote for @craigandthoseguys-week !! Craig POV this time!

Thank you for reading!!

----

Token’s residence has always been the favourite hangout, so it was expected that the votes were unanimous when our group decided where to have our highly anticipated boy’s night. My house usually had adult guests over during the evening, Tweek’s parents don’t leave us alone at his place, Clyde wasn’t a very good host, and Jimmy’s parents had completely banned any of his friends from going over because of the aftermath when they went out of town once. Playing fantasy in fourth grade had it’s consequences.

Mr and Mrs Black even decided to take a spa trip so that we’d purposely have the house to ourselves. Risky, but I guess Token is reliable enough to make sure the house is in pristine condition by the time they get back. Even if the rest of us aren’t.

After the four of us shared a car to get there, we were joyfully greeted by Token at his front door and led up to his room. Only it wasn’t Token at the front, it was Clyde, who excitedly (and pretty rudely) barged right in front of us all. We’re all equipped with sleeping bags and rucksacks, each carrying a different assortment of things. Well...besides the essentials.

We collectively decided that I would be in charge of bringing booze to the occasion. My parents were the only ones who didn’t give a shit if I hoarded a large amount of alcohol, so there was no debating it.

Clyde had brought a TON of junk food. He regularly had a pantry stocked with all kinds of goodies (when he wasn’t scoffing it himself) so he just grabbed whatever he could find and stuffed it in a bag.

Tweek was in charge of DVD’s. Being the anxious wreck that he is, we figured it would be best that he picked the film selection so that he didn’t get too disturbed by anything. I did help him out a little, though.

And lastly, Jimmy took it upon himself to come up with any backup plans, incase we got bored with anything. We had no doubts that he would think of some fun shit to do, or bring something that would entertain us. After all, we’d do anything to avoid going to sleep early.

Token had a good amount of food and entertainment himself, but we thought it was only fair to handle our own, since his parents were being so accommodating to us. Plus, he had every video game console thinkable, and a good game selection at that. We were more than prepared.

~

Walking into Token’s oversized bedroom, Clyde drops his backpack on the ground and launches himself onto the kingsized bed starfish style.

“You know you’re not sleeping there right...?” I remind him.

“Unless you’re s-s-spooning with T-Token.” Jimmy jokes from behind me.

Clyde just nuzzles into the bed even further. “I’m sure he’d be happy to have me.”

“Uhhh like fuck I would...” Token retorts, “Your ass is on the floor.”

Clyde turns onto his side and attempts his sexiest pose (which, believe it or not, wasn’t sexy at all). “Don’t be like that baby~”

“Just get over here and unroll your damn sleeping bag” Token says, throwing the sleeping bag directly at Clyde’s head with perfect aim. The impact sends him flying backwards. I thought Clyde was supposed to be the sporty one out of us? He can’t catch if his life depended on it.

Tweek stands next to me, shaking his head and smirking. It definitely isn’t a first for us to witness antics like this; we’re so used to it, it’s unbelievable. I take his rucksack off him and put in down next to mine.

“Here, I’ll take care of your bed.”

“Ngh! Craig, I’m fine doing it myself, really!”

I ignored him and started to set it up anyway. But the little shit went over and grabbed mine instead. Tweek can be a stubborn fuck sometimes, but it wasn’t all that much of a bad thing.

We’d all laid out our sleeping bags in a line (in front of the television, of course) as the sun was just about to set outside. Mine was on the far left, with Tweek next to me, Clyde next to him and Jimmy on the right. We changed into our pyjamas and nestled into our sleeping bags, Token sitting down right in the middle of us. Damn right were we gonna make this a proper conventional slumber party.

Token switched the TV on and some animal documentary was showing. There was a lioness with some lion cubs and it was telling the story of their survival.

“No way?! You’ve got the Nintendo Switcheroo!” Clyde exclaims out of nowhere, making us all jump out of our skin. He crawls over to the console to investigate. Token looks pissed off as Clyde’s big-ass head was blocking some of the screen, and he seems kind of invested in the lion story.

I sigh. “…you did NOT just call it a fucking Nintendo Switcheroo..."

“Of course he’s got one man! He owns everything!” Tweek jokes.

“Yeah, p-p-pauper.” Jimmy stutters. Token just blows a raspberry in response.

“We need to play Mario Kart. We’re playing Mario Kart. Right now.” Clyde dictates.

I groan and roll my eyes. I thought that game had died many years ago…however…when it WAS a thing, I did kick some serious ass.

Fortunately the game box was staring him right in the face, so he started trying to set it up, taking out the disc and trying to figure out how to switch the console on.

Meanwhile the documentary was getting pretty dramatic, as a group of hyenas were closing in on the mother lion and her kids. She was fighting them off, but then the narrator explains how she left behind one of her babies while doing so. It shows one of the hyenas circling the cub like a shark.

Tweek yells out, turning his head away. “Oh god hurry up Clyde!! It’s gonna eat the cub!!”

“I’m trying!!” Clyde whines, pressing any button BUT the correct one. It was clear he wasn’t a fan of the documentary either by how frantic he was being.

The hyena started closing in on the cub.

“CLYDE!! PLEASE!!” Tweek holds his hands over his ears, trying to completely shut it out. I try and comfort him while looking over at Token as if to say ‘don’t just sit there, help him’. He does exactly that and crawls over, pressing a button on the side with ease. Thankfully, the channel automatically switches over and the game console loads onto the screen. I feel a giant exhalation of relief coming from Tweek, who finally withdraws himself from burying his face in my chest.

~

Eventually the title screen appears with the familiar Mario Kart jingle playing. Jimmy starts to wiggle along to it, which, of course, persuades Clyde to dance too. Tweek and I decided we’d share the controller and take it in turns since there could only be four players at once.

When it came to selecting our characters; Token picked Mario, Jimmy went for Toad, and Clyde settled for the ‘Fly Guy’ (Shy Guy). I let Tweek pick our character and he went for Yoshi.

The first course was selected and it was one of the basic Mario stadium courses. Tweek passed the controller to me and the race began. Clyde and I zoomed off ahead, Token went at a normal start, and Jimmy pressed the button too early and caused his kart to blow up.

“Fuck…f-f-f…f-fuck a duck.” Jimmy curses.

I end up taking the lead by quite a bit, Clyde chasing me in second. He’s super competitive; the kinda guy who leans in the same direction as he steers. He was constantly targeting me; sending red and blue shells in my direction at any chance he could. Typical.

The race ends with me in 1st, Clyde in 2nd, Token in 5th and Jimmy in 8th.

“Loser chugs his beer!!” Clyde makes a terrible suggestion. Jimmy rolls with it anyway, grabbing a can of beer and impressively chugging while Clyde and Token count from 10 down to zero. Jimmy can be a real dark horse. Well…maybe not when it comes to Mario Kart though.

Race number 2 is some sort of jack-and-the-beanstalk type level. Tweek takes the wheel this time, and it proved to have been a bad idea. The road has a lot of holes and tight corners without barriers, and Tweek somehow managed to fall off every single one. It even got to the point where the CPU in first place was lapping him.

Of course, he was very vocal about this. “Jesus are you kidding me?! How are you supposed to make that turn?! HOW?!”

Token ended up in 2nd place, Clyde in 4th, Jimmy in 5th, and Tweek…in last place. Before the other guys could even suggest it, I grabbed my can of beer and chugged for ten seconds. They just looked at me dumbfounded, including Tweek. Like hell was I gonna let Tweek chug his beer; I don’t even think he’s opened his can up yet. We’re a team, and I’m the one who’ll be taking the consequences.

The next race came around and it was one of the Bowser castles. Clyde struggled in this level, while Token, Jimmy and I were in the top three. Clyde, after somehow blaming Token for his loss, ended up coming 9th and chugged his beer like there was no tomorrow.

The last stage loaded up…Rainbow Road. Of COURSE Tweek had to get the two difficult courses... I kept my beer in my hand ready to chug again.

The race starts; there goes Clyde. Plummeting into the void below.

Jimmy starts off pretty well but eventually starts to lose his skill when it comes to the tight corners.

Token is a little better than the other two, but he keeps getting hit with items from the CPUs and ends up being knocked back in the placing.

With Clyde in last, Jimmy in 11th and Token in 9th…where does that put Tweek, I hear you ask? Well... Tweek was driving so slowly and cautiously that he managed to dodge the majority of the corners. Then he got a bullet item on the last lap and soared his way right into 2nd place. He even gave an excited little fist pump when he crossed the finish line.

“…...I think that victory alone deserves a chug from all of you.” I insist, slinging my arm around Tweek. He chuckles in response.

After a few groans and eye rolls, the three of them reluctantly chug their beer while Tweek and I counted down from 10.

~

A couple hours later and Jimmy had decided that we were going to play drinking games. How old were we again?

Tweek even agreed to it, intrigued at what kind of secrets were going to be revealed during this.

“Never have I ever…gotten arrested!” Token starts.

Well…we’ve all been in trouble with the police at some point, but actually arrested? Hmm…I’m sure I got caught with something illegal once. I drink anyway.

Jimmy drinks due to causing grievous bodily harm to his ex girlfriend, Nancy.

Clyde drinks due his whole involvement with the Nazi zombies and stealing the green goo from the government.

Tweek doesn’t drink because he’s never actually been arrested. Of course, he’s still been in trouble with the police like the rest of us back in our ‘vigilante’ days.

Next it was Jimmy’s turn. “N-never have I ever been awake for more than t-t-twenty four hours.”

Clyde doesn’t drink. The dude can’t function without at least 8 hours of sleep.

Token takes a sip while telling us about how one time he’d spent all night studying for finals and then worked a 12 hour shift the next day. He makes way too much work for himself sometimes...

Tweek and I both drink. Do I even need to explain Tweek’s reasoning?

“Uhhh…never have I ever…broken somebody's heart.” Tweek takes his turn.

Fuck, another shot for me. I had no regrets when it came to making girls cry when I was younger. He manages to catch the other three out too; Clyde and Token even clink their cans together, sighing disappointedly. We’re a gang of heartbreakers.

Clyde is up next. “Never have I everrrr…..sent a text to the wrong person!”

Nobody else drinks but Jimmy; I figured he would be pretty flippant in that area.

But then I realised something.

“…wait…that is horse shit.”

Clyde looks at me bewildered. I whip out my phone and bring up Clyde’s texts. I can feel Tweek’s chin resting on my shoulder, taking a peek.

“3 weeks ago. Wednesday, July 10th. 9:24pm. ‘hey babe u looked gorgeous on ur recent instagram pic, u got nice legs’.” I look back up at him with a blank expression, Tweek chuckling next to me.

Clyde goes completely silent for a minute, his face flushing bright pink. Jimmy and Token laugh a little too, Jimmy putting his arm over Clyde in sympathy.

“Are you s-sure he doesn’t just think your legs are nice, C-C-Craig?” Jimmy winks at me.

“Jimmy…when have I ever showed my legs on Instagram.” I scoff.

“There’s a first for everything!” Token jests.

~

In the early hours of the morning we find ourselves sprawled across the floor in our sleeping bags, watching All Dogs Go To Heaven - a film that Tweek had chosen. He was resting his head on my lap, and when it neared the end of the movie, I noticed him sniffing. I reached down and wiped away the tiny bit of water that had appeared under his eye. Meanwhile, Clyde had used up an entire tissue box, Token wasn’t even watching the film because he was cleaning up after Clyde, and Jimmy was making fun of every little aspect of the film.

When the movie finished we moved right onto another one; some cheesy comedy that Token had suggested. Mainly because Tyler Perry was in it.

Clyde was asleep within minutes; mouth wide open and snoring like a pig.

It didn’t take long for Jimmy to doze off too, clearly not impressed with the humour.

Token was now in his bed, snickering to himself and eating potato chips. From the angle he was at, he probably didn’t realise that all four of us were completely disinterested in the movie.

Tweek was snuggled into the side of my neck, slowly drifting into dream world. I drew circles on his back with the tip of my fingers, using my other hand to play with a strand of his thin blonde hair. A few years ago this would have never been a thing; there’d only be the four of us, with Tweek hanging out with entirely different cliques. Luckily the guys were quick to accept him into our group once we started dating, and treated him like one of us immediately.

I guess that’s one of the many things I can thank them for.

----

[reidandwrite]

Rise ‘n Shine (Spencer Reid)

Overview - In which a beautiful morning is interrupted by Penelope and Derek.

A/N: Requested. Sorry it’s kind of short, but I hope you still like it! :-)

You flip over in your bed, now laying on top of a bare chest. You can hear your boyfriend’s heart beat and feel your head rise with his chest every time he takes a breath in. The room is dark and silent and at this very moment, you’re so content with the world. 

Until you hear a banging on your door followed by the voices of Penelope Garcia and Derek Morgan telling you to open up. You and Spencer both try to ignore it, hoping that if you ignored it long enough, it would go away. After what seems like 2 minutes straight of them knocking and yelling, you groan in annoyance. “Babe, it’s Penelope and Derek. Go open it for them,” you say as you roll off of him so he can get up.

“It woke you up first, you open it,” Spencer whines as he scoots a little bit closer to you.

“Babe, please?” You ask him. No answer. “Spencer, pleaaaaaaaase?” You whine out and shake him. He sighs before groaning yet again.

“Who is it,” he calls out.

“I could’ve done that,” you say to him with your face pressed into your pillow. You roll over once more so that your head is resting on his chest again and both of your legs are intertwined with his.

“Well then why didn’t you,” he chuckles with his eyes still closed. You lift your arm and playfully smack his chest.

“Pretty boy, open up! Come on!” Derek’s voice sneaks it’s way through the cracks of the doorframe.

“It’s open,” Spencer says in a deep, groggy voice as he’s half asleep.

“Oh, would you look at that, it is,” you hear Penelope say after she’s pushed the door all the way open.

“Wow, soooooooo glad we gave you both keys,” you call out with a small giggle. 

After joining the BAU 4 years ago, you never thought that this would be happening 4 years later: 1) You and Spencer dating after your first 6 months at the BAU. 2) You and him actually hitting the 2 year mark and ending up moving in together. 3) You giving Penelope and Derek each a copy of your guy’s house key. 4) Them both walking in on you laying on his chest underneath the covers of your king size bed.

“Hey, we only used them to get into your living room! Notice how we gave courtesy to knock on your bedroom door,” Penelope says joyfully, “speaking of: why are you both in bed? It’s the BAU’s day off, we’re doing something fun!”

“Fun for us too, man, not just following them around all day while they shop, like last time,” Derek jokes to Spencer, earning him a small laugh. “Emily decided to throw together a little brunch at her new place.”

“JJ and Will are coming with the boys, too! You know how much you both love your godsons,” Penelope tries to convince you.

“What time is the brunch?” You say softly as Spencer pulls you closer to his chest.

“10am on the dot!” Penelope answers back.

“And what time is it right now?” Spencer asks this time, his voice barely audible.

“8am,” Derek replies.

“Cool. Come back in 2 hours,” you murmur as Spencer and you share a giggle.

“What you don’t want to hang out with us til then?” Derek laughs. It’s not that you didn’t want to hang out with them; you loved them both. But the team got back from a 8 day long case last night and Hotch gave you all strict orders to relax. 

This was how you and Spencer relaxed. You sleep in until 11, you stay in bed another hour as you watch whatever new serial killer documentary Netflix just released, you order takeout, and you walk around the apartment without pants on. 

“I’ll have you know that Derek and I are two hip-happening young people and just because you two were the youngest agents in FBI history, that doesn’t mean you’re too cool to hang out with us,” Penelope says and you can just tell that she’s shaking her finger at you because you can hear all her bracelets jingling with one another. “In fact, I may just force you both to get up right now,” she smirks and walks over to the curtains that are keeping the room almost pitch black. After slowly grabbing them in her hands, she yanks them open, revealing the glaring sun throughout your bedroom. With the white walls and all the art hanging, the room turns as bright as ever. 

Before the sunlight can bother you, though, you and Spencer each pull up the covers over your eyes, protecting you both from the light you were dreading to see. “Go awaaaaaay,” you say to her through the covers.

“Ooh, you think the covers over you head is gonna protect you from the amazing Penelope Garcia? Think again,” she giggles and you can feel her take a grip on the covers that’s on top of you and Spence right now.

“Pen, I, uh, wouldn’t do that,” you warn her and try to stifle a soft laugh.

“And I would listen to her...” Spencer agrees and nods his head.

“Or what, you’ll profile me to death,” she laughs, “come on you, two! Wakey, wakey!” She yanks the blanket off of you and Spencer revealing him in boxers and you in one of his shirts- only it’s ridden up, now revealing that you’re not wearing any pants, only a thin, black thong.

“Ah!” “Oh my God!” You hear them both scream and jump to their feet and out the bedroom, shutting the door behind them. You and Spencer don’t open your eyes once, but laugh uncontrollably. You lift the blanket back up to cover you and Spencer’s bodies and snuggle in deeper to his chest. 

“I mean, I warned them,” you giggle and shake your head. A few seconds after, you hear another knock on the bedroom door.

“Yes?” Spencer asks with a small grin.

“Sorry,” Penelope and Derek say through the door.

“And what are those keys only used for from now on?” You ask in a simple tone.

“Emergencies,” they say together. You can tell they’re frowning from the dullness of their voices and you can’t help but snort out a bit in laughter.

“And what time are we meeting?” Spencer calls out.

“10,” they reply. 

“Alrighty then, remember to lock our front door on the way out! Thanks,” Spencer voices in a semi-mocking tone. You wait a few seconds and hear your front door shut and lock. You let out a sigh of relief that you finally have some peace and quiet. One problem: now you can’t go back to sleep.

“Spence... are you awake too,” you nudge him a bit and hope he’s awake too.

“Sadly, yes. Those two really know how to ruin a good dream,” he jokes and opens his eyes.

“I know! And now it’s too bright in here for me to fall back asleep,” you put your arm on his chest and rest your head on it as you lock eyes with him. His brown orbs are bright and wide and he finally looks well rested, something neither have you have been in a long time. 

You examine his face and smile at him. His chin and jaw have a little bit of stubble and his lips are a little swollen. His mahogany colored hair is unkept and long strands are pointed in every direction. He doesn’t even look like he’s just woke up. To be honest, he looked as if he was going to be posing for a photoshoot in bed.

“How do you look this good right when you wake up?” He smiles at you, reciprocating the thoughts you had about him moments ago.

“Shut up,” you laugh and roll your eyes at his cheesiness. 

“No, seriously. You look...,” he starts to say and clears his throat, “um, I mean, what do you want to do until Emily’s brunch?”

“I don’t know, it’s in two hours so we probably wouldn’t have time to leave the apartment and do anything else, if we want to be on time,” you shrug.

“So you’re telling me we should probably just stay in bed the next two hours? What ever shall we do?” He says in a seemingly sarcastic tone. You raise an eyebrow as you realize what he’s suggesting.

“Oh, I might be able to think of a few things,” you giggle as you lean up a little bit and kiss his stubbly jaw.

[masterlist]

[tabloidtoc]

Life & Style, March 1

You can buy a copy of this issue for your very own at my eBay store: https://www.ebay.com/str/bradentonbooks

Cover: How Justin Timberlake destroyed Britney Spears

Page 1: Photo Flash -- last March, plans were announced for a TV adaptation of American Gigolo which is the 1980 film that transformed Richard Gere into a star -- after some holdups, the series is finally in production with The Walking Dead's Jon Bernthal stepping into the role to play handsome but cold-hearted Julian 18 years later. In this pic, he's being filmed in the ocean

Page 2: Contents

Page 4: The Top 10 Bow Looks -- Caitriona Balfe, Yara Shahidi, Nicole Kidman, Sarah Levy, Jennifer Lopez

Page 5: Elle Fanning, Idina Menzel, Lana Condor, Zoe Kravitz, Sarah Hyland

Page 6: Aaron Rodgers and Shailene Woodley are engaged after just six months of dating -- the Green Bay Packers quarterback broke the news during the NFL Honors event, giving his fiancee a shout-out while accepting an award for Most Valuable Player and though the betrothal came as a shock to most people, family and friends weren't surprised -- Shailene doesn't fall in love easily but when she does, she's all in and having just broken up with Fijian rugby player Ben Volavola, Shailene wasn't expecting to fall for Aaron let alone marry him but she did and she's never been happier

Page 8: Hailey Baldwin got her mom Kennya a gig with Bare Minerals to help her folks stay afloat -- it's not secret that her dad Stephen Baldwin is terrible with money and he's defaulted on mortgages, had run-ins with the IRS and filed for bankruptcy -- Hailey's husband Justin Bieber who's worth $285 million has also opened up his wallet and Justin has so much money, he doesn't know what to do with it so he's happy to help out any way that he can

* Rebel Wilson and boyfriend Jacob Busch have called it quits after less than a year of dating and there were some red flags that she couldn't ignore as their relationship progressed such as Jacob being a little too enamored with fame and Rebel started to suspect that he was in it for the wrong reasons so she cut him loose

Page 10: The Week in Photos -- Jordin Sparks was unmasked as the Exotic Bird on The Masked Dancer

Page 12: Lucky Dogs -- Rebel Wilson made a four-legged friend on the set of her new dog grooming competition Pooch Perfect, Martha Stewart and Snoop Dogg cheered on teams of adorable and adoptable dogs at Puppy Bowl XVII

Page 13: Lucy Hale with her new rescue dog Ethel and her dog Elvis, Maria Menounos snuggled up to her dog Whinnie on a flight, Demi Moore and daughter Tallulah Willis and three of their dogs

Page 16: Daphne Oz prepared a massive helping of kale salad with apple and farro, Olivia Culpo got messy with confetti at Shaquille O'Neal's pre-Super Bowl party, John Legend playing the piano with son Miles

Page 18: Say What?! Venus Williams on her love of beauty treatments, Nina Dobrev on her rescue pup Maverick, Kaley Cuoco on husband Karl Cook's latest hairdo, Miley Cyrus who says she hasn't done drugs in years, Susan Sarandon on scrapped plans for a follow-up to 1991's Thelma & Louise

Page 22: Rather than let the loss of their unborn son Jack due to miscarriage tear them apart, Chrissy Teigen and John Legend found a way to cope with the pain together -- Chrissy sought counseling and in November, she celebrated one month of sobriety and the transformative experience brought Chrissy closer to John

Page 23: Sofia Richie was spotted packing on the PDA with shipping heir Gil Ofer in Miami Beach -- the son of an Israeli billionaire, Gil is a Harvard grad who's studying for his MBA at the London Business School -- while he's not throwing his billionaire status around Gil has made it pretty easy for Sofia to fall for him by lavishing her with gifts of jewelry, shopping sprees, travel and expensive dinners -- although her famous father Lionel Richie can be pretty protective Lionel likes that Gil is driven, comes from a good family and supports himself and he's not in showbiz and Lionel is happy as long as Sofia is happy

Page 24: Cover Story -- The Downfall of Britney Spears and Why Justin Timberlake Is to Blame -- a new Britney documentary takes a fresh look at what and who pushed the pop star over the edge -- after Justin publicly blamed Britney for their 2002 split, implying she'd cheated, she was more diplomatic despite being crushed and since the release of Framing Britney Spears fans have been calling for Justin to apologize to Britney

Page 28: Kelly Clarkson: Being a Single Mom Is Hard -- in the wake of her split Kelly is feeling exhausted raising two young children on her own -- even during her marriage to Brandon Blackstock, Kelly says that she took on a majority of the parenting duties but it's definitely more challenging for her raising the kids solo -- with so much time spent with her kids and on the job Kelly has put meeting Mr. Right on the backburner

Page 30: Princess Diana brings Meghan Markle and Duchess Kate Middleton back together -- on Princess Diana's would-be 60th birthday, Kate and Meghan will reunite to honor their husbands' late mom -- in the past Kate has been accused of being unwelcoming to her sister-in-law while Meghan's been labeled a diva and while neither is perfect, Diana wasn't either -- the statue of Diana will be unveiled at Kensington Palace's picturesque sunken garden with Prince Charles and their sons Prince William and Prince Harry and families in attendance

Page 32: Jennifer Lopez's new rules for Alex Rodriguez -- as cheating rumors swirl yet again, J.Lo lays down the law with A-Rod -- ever since the latest rumors surfaced Alex has upped his game with Jennifer, showering her with gifts, flowers and expensive jewelry but it's going to take more than that for her to trust him -- Madison LeCroy denies having a physical affair with Alex but does say that he slid into her DMs and that they've spoken over the phone and the communication between them was a year ago

Page 36: Who Lives Here? Halsey

Page 40: Diva or Down-to-Earth? Jax Taylor filled up his Jeep at an LA gas station -- down-to-earth, Naomi Campbell jetted out of Kenya on a charter plane -- diva, when you're worth $200 million your glam team comes to you and Salma Hayek was sitting pretty at home as she prepped for an interview -- diva, James Van Der Beek and daughter Olivia had fun playing Monopoly -- down-to-earth

Page 42: Social Stars Posts of the Week -- Elizabeth Banks transformed into Baby Yoda, naked Emily Ratajkowski shows off her baby bump, Queer Eye's Jonathan Van Ness and husband Mark Peacock, Cindy Crawford and daughter Kaia Gerber play chess

Page 44: Horoscope -- Pisces Drew Barrymore turned 46 on February 22

* They're Not Together, But They Should Be -- Sagittarius Paula Patton and Leo Ben Affleck

Page 46: Made Ya Look! Serena Williams strikes a pose for her latest collab with luggage brand Away

Page 48: What I'm Into -- Melissa Gorga of The Real Housewives of New Jersey

[skyfanatica]

FLASHBACK FRIDAY: SKY FERREIRA INTERVIEW, APRIL/MAY 2011

SOURCE

JUNE 29TH, 2011

Even amongst the glitterati of New York where the toast of the town changes from night-to-night if not hour-to-hour, the current buzz surrounding Sky Ferreira is incessant. The LA-born bombshell moved to the Big Apple last year and has been taking the city by storm with her flamboyant Latin-American looks, her never-ending energy and a burgeoning music career that is already receiving masses of attention even though her debut album is yet to be released.

She’s become a mainstay of CK One’s recent ad campaigns, appeared in Uffie’s video for ‘Pop The Glock’, played a cameo role in Matthew Porterfield’s drama Putty Hill singing (‘I Will Always Love You’) and somewhat less elegantly, starred in Justice’s tour documentary A Cross The World.

“Ugh, they made me look like their fucking groupie,” she snaps of that now-infamous scene where she’s filmed drunkenly belting out the French duo’s hit ‘We Are Your Friends’ a cappella on a dressing room floor. Aside from these on-film appearances, Ferreira also boasts a bulging portfolio of magazine articles, blog posts and Lolita-chic fashion shoots that would make professional models twice her age envious.

As she meets Wonderland in the lobby of the trendy Bowery Hotel in downtown Manhattan, it’s not hard to see Ferreira’s appeal. Even in a varsity t-shirt, spring jacket and boots, her striking looks stick out a mile even in the dimly lit bar area. Such effortless style and beauty has undoubtedly opened numerous doors for her, but Ferreira shows an open disdain for her reputation as an arch-scenester, a socialite with inflated film-star aspirations or worse still, a debauched band-aid. The reality is apparently far more mundane.

“The bizarre thing is that I really don’t go out all that often – I stick to the same five people most of the time,” she explains gesticulating wildly to underline her point. “It’s just when I do go out, there’s always someone there to take a picture and then it just looks like you’re partying when in reality, I was probably just stopping by to see a friend. I’m not a needy person. I like to spend a lot of time by myself.”

She wrote her first songs when she was just an infant (“at least, I thought they were songs” she laughs) but like most kids, the teenage years were when Ferreira’s real tastes began to blossom. Using Myspace as her platform, Ferriera then started to upload her own music and began an almost unnervingly persistent campaign of contacting producers and songwriters in the hope of pestering them until they would agree to work with her.

“I am the sort of person that will push and push until I get what I want,” she sniggers and to her credit, it’s an approach that paid off. Almost immediately, Swedish duo Bloodshy & Avant (who were responsible for Britney Spears’ career-defining ‘Toxic‘, and have also written and produced for Jennifer Lopez, Kelis, Kylie Minogue and Miike Snow) saw the potential that the 15-year-old Ferreira had and agreed to a collaboration that would eventually produce her debut single ‘One‘. Not satisfied with that score, she also enlisted the likes of Greg Kurstin, Colin Munroe, Nicole Morier and even Linda Perry to work on an album’s worth of songs before finally signing to EMI in 2009.

Another reason that Ferreira has felt the wrath of the blogosphere is her forthright approach to sexuality. Aside from being an obvious object of desire for the world’s seedier population, she’s spoken honestly about her attraction to older men – on As If! track ‘108’ she teases: “My secret lover is 108 / I know it sounds insane / it’s really OK”. She also caused an uproar when a picture of her posing with a bottle of vodka between her legs found its way on to Katy Perry’s Twitter feed. The lead track from As If! EP, ‘Sex Rules’ only furthers that overtly sexualized image that Ferreira has built up but again, it’s something that she regards with incredulousness rather than regret.

“I’m not a raging slut! I’ve actually only been with one person in my whole life who’s been my boyfriend for two years. But being sexually active at that age is more normal than a lot of people want to believe. To me, ‘Sex Rules’ is funny and playful. That was my intention at least, especially with those lines about using ‘your God given tools.’ I wrote it with Billy Steinberg who wrote ‘Like A Virgin’ and ‘I Touch Myself’, so he has this lineage of racy songs. I couldn’t ignore his history. It would be like getting the world’s best guitarist to guest on your album and asking him to play the trumpet!”

As the interview slowly winds down to a close, we can’t help but notice that Ferreira’s attention is already being drawn to another area of the Bowery’s plush bar area and that she’s keen to move on. The world, it would seem, waits for no woman, especially one with as much enterprise and determination as her.

But before disappearing, she makes it clear once and for all that for the most part, the tabloid version of Sky Ferreira is a myth that needs to be vanquished. And she has the tools to do it too. “The only way to really get past all the things people say about me or the ideas that they have is the music. If it’s good enough and it can’t be denied then things will change. There’s no other way to prove it. My music has always been my priority… and it always will be.”

[101tarnations-blog]

svadobný fotograf bratislava

kameraman na svadbu It's no secret that each young couples are continually searching for an experienced shooter, who can perform making the pinnacle in ideal wedding ceremony images, and the chances are, your own wedding photographer would like the opportunity in order to seize your personal time and provide you with those perfect wedding pictures way too. The key to incredible photographs is simply as a result of communication. And sad to say, since its not all expert wedding day photographers might not would like to tell you the things they truly feel (out of politeness), this information is on this page to make it happen to them. Your wedding professional photographer doesn't very own a crystal baseball. Although they want they have, the wedding photographer is unable to read through your thoughts and anticipate what exactly it is that you want. This means it's your accountability to generally be upfront and tell them just what you wish and the things which you don't want. It's suggested to provide your shooter by using a brief list of shots that you need from a wedding day. Photographers will not be magicians. Your wedding day professional photographer will do their best to find the photographs you want, yet are not going to produce your wedding resemble it's come out of an increased-conclusion dvd. Maybe you have also witnessed one thing on Pinterest which you like, despite the fact that it's wonderful to obtain creativity, your photographer is really an artisan and might be hesitant to replicate yet another photographer's job, so don't anticipate your wedding event photos to become identical to someone else's. You can just Photoshop that out, appropriate? All this will depend on what 'that' is. Your wedding day photographer would want to get almost everything as great as personally attainable on camera. Position scouting, posing, and video camera adjustments can 'fix' most things before the click on of the shutter. Nevertheless, if a family member chooses to inappropriately photography bomb you throughout your photograph, your professional photographer will want to retake the take pictures of all over again. It's far simpler to acquire your wedding day image correct the very first time rather than to get rid of it with Photoshop down the road. Several photography lovers will most likely charge for in depth degrees of Photoshop croping and editing, as the approach can be extremely time-having. Give your wedding day shooter plenty of time. Timeframes and lots of arranging will help make your professional photographer happy. Nevertheless, the need to be flexible is still there. To get that ideal shot might need some time, that will make be more difficult than you initially believed. For high quality photographs, don't speed your photographer! If you need your digital photographer to catch many of the protection in Documentary, Honest design and style then any timeframe is okay. Don't forget about to clean up! When your wedding photographer is due to get photographs in the happy couple getting ready for his or her special day, don't ignore to clean up up! Fifty percent enjoyed the morning meal serial, spilt clean orange and unfilled caffeine glasses aren't something you intend to place with your photos.

It's unlikely that you will observe every photo which was undertaken. The reality associated with this make a difference is you probably don't want to see every image. A marriage photographer's career would be to filter via your entire images and choose exactly the finest versions. These photographs will then glance at the painstaking task of finely editing and enhancing them. Editing more than a 1,000 (or else much more) images is not going to occur. The value of being versatile. Your wedding day photographer realizes that you in all probability don't prefer to shell out your entire morning having a multitude of unique photographs. But if there is an original instant that features themselves, it's very recommended that you opt for it. Be sure that you make me look nice in my wedding party pictures. The truth of the matter is, occasionally couples find that they definitely despise their wedding party pictures, often it's as a result of place they can be in, and the strange grimace look that they can presented. Nevertheless, your professional photographer would be wise to help you feel relaxed and comfortable and suggest positions and creates that appear and above all, truly feel all-natural to the two of you. Should you be in a very present that can feel unnatural, communicate with your professional photographer, (although you may have selected bad wedding photographer), everybody must feel comfortable different it is going to present by way of around the photographs. Remember to always unwind and just be sure you depart extra time between your picture capture as well as your next thing on your own record so you don't feel rushed. Each wedding event is unique. Some favor to achieve the capture of the day inside a Documentary honest way, some are Acceptable to obtain some kind of startup photographs, so how much time you require it's definitely your responsibility, but additionally request your shooter if their style of digital photography require much more time or significantly less. Make certain you get lots of sleep the evening before your special occasion, stay well hydrated and prevent the hangovers so that you appear brimming with strength, vibrant, and cheery on your pictures!