#7x05 Till Death

[bronx-bomber87]

Good Evening amazing fandom :) This was very light Chenford wise. And I'm ok with that when the main SL is really solid like last week was. Now Nyla's stuff was good. That new serial killer made my skin crawl. Could go without FBI guys being involved but get why they are. Mainly a Bailey/Balian heavy ep. Which I knew we'd have at some point given the finale.

I mean that with zero offense to anyone who loves her character or this ship. You should have eps around your favs. It's an ensemble cast after all. How it should be. They are just not my cup of tea is all. So this impressions will be shorter than usual due to that. Looks like next week will more than make up for that. Let us dive into what we did get shall we?

7x05 Till Death

This was a really smart move on Lucy's part. Going to his high school counselor. No better place to get the truth on this kid than her. She’ll have good insight. Like Tim said last week, Lucy isn't satisfied with the answer she got. This is proof of that heh I love her for it. We all know our girl isn't one to quit. Tim's answer last week did little to assuage her worry. So here we are at Ridley's H.S.

This scene explains that outfit now too. I remember people thought her being a detective was the reason. When her tik-tok came out with it the buzz about that was unreal haha But sadly tis not the case. Not disappointed with her being a T.O. at all though. Just remember the excited theorizing about it. We had nothing to go off of. So we dined on the crumbs we got for months LOL

Lucy making Seth cough up all his BS is fantastic. That’s my girl. I absolutely loved that she didn’t let him get away with it, not even for a second. She not only forced him to admit he lied, but also made him reveal the real truth behind it. I wanted to sucker punch him as he spoke. So many lies. Holy shit. They just compound when you do that my man. His reasoning is crap like I expected it to be.

That he uses half truths to get out of trouble. That's not great reasoning to explain what you've done.... It's pretty awful reasoning tbh. Also the thing is he’s lied so much now I can’t even trust that's even true. Idk how Lucy can. It's written all over her face how over his bullshit she is. Said this before she's a ten but real bad at hiding her feelings.

She is wearing them all over her sleeve this entire scene. No way he didn't sense her annoyance. Or how very done she is with him and his excuses. I mean I don't blame her. How can she train this kid without ever trusting what comes out of his mouth? Literally could lie at any given moment. Really dug himself a hole. Lucy looks so frustrated and upset. I hate this. Doesn’t even know what she wants to do with him....

Oh my Timothy, that’s quite the description of what a relationship is my love. It's almost like he has first hand experience what a healthy relationship looks like... We all know that's what he had with Lucy till he destroyed it. *sigh* He’s just a grumpasaurus cause he’s post-Lucy. He lost his constant sunshine person that made him softer.

It was self inflicted as we all know. That doesn't meant it isn't still having lasting ramifications for him due to it. Also he had a bad experience with that whole thing. So the rant makes sense and is warranted. Luna even explains why Tim is that way. I do adore her. Always sunshine and light with her kindness towards Miles. Twas nice to see.

Lucy coming to find her person always makes me happy. Suspicions confirmed. So naturally she must go find hubby. I love his ‘Uh oh.’ When she closes the door. Lucy spewing all she has on Seth to him. Expecting him to to be just as outraged as she is. Disappointed when he isn’t more upset along with her. His logic is sound though. Even if they wanted to boot him it wouldn't be a easy sell with Grey.

A man who is SO stressed about the budget and their perception to the public atm. So I get what Tim is aiming at. Doesn't make it less crappy to deal with though. I have been there in my last job. Where morally I didn’t want to keep someone. But we were so understaffed they let them stay for just that reason. Even when I objected. I hated it sfm. Every fiber of my being loathed mentoring someone who didn't deserve to be there. So I empathize with Lucy so very much with this.

Tim ‘I bounce boots for breakfast.’ Bradford Lmao I’m dying. I mean no one calls out Tim like our girl. Hot damn. I do love her for it. But of course he’s turning this into a learning moment for her. Because it's Tim. Saying it’s on her to correct it. I mean he’s not wrong… But it’s agitating nonetheless. Since he hasn't lied officially it's a moral issue and not a legal one since its not work related.

Which beyond sucks. No two ways about it. Especially since Lucy has been a good teacher to him. He's taking advantage of that wholeheartedly. He wouldn't have made it past day one with Tim. But he sees Lucy's empathy and is exploiting it. *grumble* Her smile at the end with Tim isn't without a little flirty energy I will say. I will take my crumbs in a lighter episode for them.

Then immediately after Tim leaves the problem walks himself right in. I said this last ep, every time he opens his mouth I dislike him just a little bit more. He opens his mouth and I lose patience for him. I can't imagine being in Lucy's position with Seth. If the writers intention was to have me dislike this kid they're doing a masterful job. All I see is a little weasel not worthy of Lucy's time now.

I’m 100% with Lucy not trusting him. He’s gonna have to earn back her trust ten fold. If that's even possible. I would say he gets ten percent of it back and he has to earn the other ninety. That he's lucky he even gets ten. She crushes him when he uses the excuse it's stressful. Straight up OWNS his ass. We can see him panicking to get her back on his side. But that ship has sailed good sir. Not only has it but he is very aware of it.

Man when you have Lucy Chen giving up on you. It's bad my friend. Really all Lucy can do at this point is be a good leader to him. Only way to save herself when he flames out. It’s on Seth to ‘fly right’ as he put. Been there it sucks. Nothing worse than having your trust broken by someone you’re training. Because now everything is colored by that distrust. That empathy you once had has wained quite a bit if you have any left at all. Lucy did not get an easy first rookie. phew lord.

We come to the end of the episode and it's clear Lucy has sat on this the entire day. It is our girl after all. I do love that she keeps gravitating back to Tim. Makes my heart happy. Even though she is one to make the call she still needs him by her side. Friggin adore he doesn’t hesitate to go with her to Grey. I love it sfm. Goes from grumpy to supportive in a second when he realizes she needs him.

That she has a plan in action. That really she's come to him for support not advice this time. He doesn't blink before he's at her side. Not only that but not taking any shots at her decision. Wanting to give her all the confidence by backing it. (How very far we've come with that) Lucy is looking elated he’s coming with and supporting her.

I was thinking time to boot that little schmuck. I said couple eps ago I was kind of hoping he'd wash out. Then this happened. His "cancer" is back……He literally tipped his hand twice with her in this episode. Saying when he thinks he is in trouble he does half truths. That when he is panicked and stressed that's his go to. Then all of a sudden his cancer is back that same day. How very convenient of those lab results to show up right now.

Tim's face is everything LOL He is now over this dude himself. The look they share is top notch though. Silent communication at it's finest. How can she say no when he says his “cancer “ is back? And in front of Grey who has zero idea about her suspicions. This feels like a ploy to keep himself safe. He could feel Lucy turning on him.

Could sense the tide was turning against him in the worst way so he did this. I could be wrong but this feels pretty right. Lucy holds his fate in her hand. So what better way to stay afloat than to use cancer. She can't possibly fire him now can she? Ugh. This little shit being far more of a problem than ever expected. Holy cow. I honestly expected Miles to be more of the problem but here we are....Shall be interesting to see how the pans out.

Now let's talk about the most exciting thing that happened which was the promo after this ep LOL Other than the little Chenford we got this ep didn't do much for me. Other than anger me against Seth lol This was a just a fillery place holder to get to this one IMO. The description alone has me amped. "The Gala" It’s Valentine’s Day, and Lieutenant Grey gives Tim and Lucy an unromantic assignment, while John and Celina track down a missing girl. Later, the team sharpens up for a charity gala where multiple relationships come to a head." Hard to believe been a year since she got her necklace. I'm not crying you are.....

Now this promo had me wishing it was next week. The promo had me all jazzed this morning. Oh my lord. Genny is back! Also Tim looks soft as butter for her in that promo. Man is transparent af. Saying how good she looks in front of people? I did say continue being this way and he is following those instructions ha To say I am excited for next week is an understatement.

Thank you to all you glorious readers. You make all the effort I put into these worth it on the days where I'm tired af and assembling these. The likes, lovely comments and reblogs make my heart happy. So never can thank you all enough for the love. Shall see you next week in 7x06 :)

~~~

Side notes-Non Chenford

Bailey sending notes to the hitman in secret. Yeah that’s not good for your marriage.....

Nice Texas has an a lovely lady at his side. Not so great she just showed up ha

PTSD for Nyla poor woman. Possible bad needle? Yikes…The stress that would give me my god.

Bailey got Jason killed holy hell....She pretty much just committed murder. She is an accessory to murder now. So that's fun for her. lol Also little anti climatic he just got offed after hunting her for months. I was more shocked he killed the girl than Jason tbh. But oh well. Least it's over early in the season.

[karihighman]

Okay, so:

Serial killer case and Nyla may get hurt(?)

Bailan angst I assume b/c Bailey’s back to face off against Jason

Lucy and Seth aren’t in a personal romantic relationship so it’s funny they phrased it that way… I’m assuming something happens on the job though that maybe makes things awk or tense??

YAY FOR ANOTHER VALENTINES DAY EPISODE ❤️ and ofc Grey is playing Cupid in his own way w/Chenford (IYKYK😅) aaaand so I’m crossing my fingers that Tim and Lucy are one of the relationships that changes during this ep!!

Also excited to see them at a gala, so hopefully that means more group scenes

John & Celina back at it on another case too!

©️DGE/ABC. SOOO EXCITED FOR THESE NEW EPISODES!! And new ep tonight!!

[4ever-chenford]

[televisionpromos]

The Rookie 7x05 "Till Death" Promo - The team searches for a serial killer as Nyla struggles with the aftermath following the attack. Lucy’s relationship with Seth takes a turn, while Bailey battles her fear of Jason Wyler.

[deadlydelicious]

Oh god wait, what if the reason we've not had a 7x05 episode description yet is because of spoilers

what if 7x04 is where they do something to James

we know from the season promo something bad happens to Nyla and James, and yes they've been building tension between the two, but the promo had Nyla weeping in a hospital bed while Westley had to comfort her. WHAT IF THAT KICKS OFF NEXT EPISODE?!

7X05 is even called Till Death, as in 'Till death do us part', what if episode 5 is them all in hospital as James dies? god even worse, Nyla was also cut up and hurt in that scene, so what if its because of something awful like they get in another fight while driving so she ends up blaming herself

fuck man, just let Nyla be happy please

[igaffuri]

Assistindo Fear the Walking Dead 7x05 "Till Death"

[taiturner]

Christine Evangelista as SHERRY Fear the Walking Dead | 7x05: “Till Death”

[verobatto]

Destiel Chronicles

(Vol. XXV)

It was a love story from the very beginning.

There was no time to say 'I'm sorry'

(7x01/7x02/7x03/7x05)

Hello my dears!! This is a new meta from my Destiel Chronicles. We will start with season 7, is gonna be a short road, I calculated a total number of six metas, so.

I want to say thank you to my friend @agusvedder , she made the gifs for this era and discussed some matters.

Okay! Let's start!

You're Not my Cas

After Cas became Godstiel, Dean noticed the big change. He wasn't Cas anymore, even his voice was different, and he'd said Dean wasn't his family.

In episode 7x01 Meet the New Boss (written by Sera Gamble) he have Dean trying to avoid Castiel's topic by trying to fix Baby (a symbolic representation of Dean's heart). Baby is broken, like Dean (bc of CAS) and he's trying to endure it. And he uses this as a distraction too. That's why when Bobby came to see him, he asked him...

BOBBY: So, you fixin' her or primal screamin'?

This is a great point of view here, if Baby is Dean's heart and he's trying to fix it. He's yelling at it. To get better quickly. To forget about Cas and his betrayal. To recognize Castiel isn't his Cas anymore. And now he's a monster and he has to stop him.

Then they start to talk about Cas, and this is the interesting part...

BOBBY: I don't even know what books to hit for this, Dean.

DEAN: Well, figure it out! I'm sorry. This ain't in no book. If you stick your neck out, Cas steps on it. So you know what I'm gonna do?

BOBBY: What?

DEAN: Imma fix this car. Because that's what I can do. I can work on her 'til she's mint. And when Sam wakes up, no matter what shape he's in, we'll glue him back together too. We owe him that.

Again, the car, his heart. He's gonna fix it, because he needs that fixed and patched, and renewed because he knows what he has to do about Cas. So he needs not to feel a thing about him.

He knows how to do that. How to fix things that hurts his heart... He pushed those things down, and deep... But he won't be able this time ( as he will say it in 7x17), because is Cas.

Then, Sam wakes up and...

Again to the car. Because Sammy put his finger in that wound... And Dean is still trying to fix it...

And Because you're not him, I'll try to kill you

Ok, now... The News...

And Dean shutting down the TV because, he knows Cas is young and sexy, he knows more than anyone, because he feels sexually attracted to him, but that, isn't Cas, so... Stop saying things I know about my Cas, I know he's hot, but this one, isn't my Cas.

He shuts the TV, angry and hurted, and he goes to fix his Baby/Heart again.

But while he's fixing Baby, he's hearing the new on the radio, to follow Castiel's steps... Godstiel is targeting motivational speakers.

SAM: Motivational speakers?

DEAN: Yeah, I'm not sure new Cas gets irony any better than old Cas. Of course, old Cas wouldn't smite Madison Square Garden just to prove a point. He is off the deep end of the deep end. And there's no slowing down.

Dean was able now to separate OLD CAS (his Cas) and NEW CAS (the monster they have to kill). His brain is doing this to help him to take the hard decision.

But Sam is the one here that can't lose his faith on Cas, he tries twice to convince his brother to speak again with Godstiel, and Dean explodes, because he was trying so hard to take this decision, and he doesn't need hopes or faith in Cas again.

SAM: Okay.

DEAN: Hand me that socket wrench.

The car again. His heart.

Dean is spilling the very hurtful thoughts he was ruminating the whole time while fixing his car/heart, yeah, that's the thing that huts him so much, Cas isn't coming back. This is not Cas. He betrayed us.

And then, when he vomited all that, he came back to fix his heart, trying hard to do it. The symbolism is exquisite and sad at the same time.

Then, Dean devised a plan to kill Godstiel by slaving Death. They asked Crowley's help, and they summoned Death.

And Godstiel enters in action again. And when se sees what Dean was doing... He said this...

CASTIEL: I didn't want to kill you, but now...

DEAN: You can't kill us.

CASTIEL: You've erased any nostalgia I had for you, Dean.

So... Godstiel had some nostalgia about Dean, because when he was CAS, they shared something profound. Is like someone remembering his ex.

But he gets more mad at Dean when the hunter orders Death to kill him, look at Godstiel's face. And look at Dean face. He's able to do that bc he had in his head a voice repeating him He's Not My Cas.

He can't believe Dean wants to kill him.

He vanished, and Dean's hopes to defeat him too. Even with Death giving them another plan... Dean is devastated.

Sam still believes in Cas

Then Dean is drinking, because he lost any hopes, but Sam, He's trying hard. He still believes in Cas, he has hopes, so he prays to him...

SAM: Hey, Castiel. Um... Maybe this is pointless. Look... I don't know if any part of you even cares, but, um, I still think you're one of us, deep down. I mean, way, way, way off the reservation, but... Look, we still have till dawn to stop this. Let us help. Please.

Sam believed Cas is still there, his part of the Team Free Will. And he had right there.

Castiel came back to his senses when he gets possesed by the Leviathans he carried inside of him. He lost control and kills innocent people. That's what makes Cas coming back. His vessel is very damaged, but he listened Sammy's prayers... And he went to him.

Dean is there too, look at his worried face, looking at Cas in that shape, and the camera focused on him immediately after showing us Cas. Is because his reaction is more important than Sammy's. But Cas was answering Sammy's prayers, so he named just Sam. Because Sam still believes in him. And Castiel asks for help.

There was not time

When they were about to re open the doorway to Purgatory, Castiel is ashamed and he wants to ask for forgiveness, but there's not time.

CASTIEL: If there was time, if I was strong enough, I'd -- I'd fix him now. I just wanted to make amends before I die.

DEAN: Okay.

CASTIEL: Is it working?

DEAN: Does it make you feel better?

CASTIEL: No. You?

DEAN: Not a bit.

A huge thing like this doesn't fix in seconds, or minutes. It requires time to talk. But they didn't have that. Cas was trying to use the few seconds he knew he had to give a good end to that. He knew he was about to die. So he tried hard, but human's feelings are not that easy to fix. Even Cas was experimenting those human's feelings too.

When they opened the gate, and Cas was about to expell the would into the Purgatory, he gave what they thought was one last look at Dean... And he said it...

With such sorrowful face, Dean echoing the sadness in his face too. A painful ending? Not... There will be more ...

Castiel's Death

Cas fell to the ground, and Dean is terrified.

DEAN: Cas?

BOBBY: He's cold.

DEAN: Is he breathing?

BOBBY: No.

Okay, this is Dean denying Castiel is dead. Bobby said HE'S COLD, and Dean was like is he breathing? And when Bobby said he didn't, Dean went with that excuse... And Bobby had to be more specific. Cas is gone.

And Dean breaks in anger again... But not for so long... Because CAS wakes up.

DEAN: Damn it. Cas, you child. Why didn't you listen to me? Cas?! Hey! Hey! Okay. All right.

The reproaches again

CASTIEL: That was unpleasant.

And again, for a few seconds before the Leviathans take control over Castiel's vessel, he tries to enmend things with Dean. Is the only thing he had in his head an heart.

CASTIEL: I'm ashamed. I really overreached.

DEAN: You think?

CASTIEL: I'm gonna find some way to redeem myself to you.

(And he will by the end of this season 😏)

DEAN: All right, well, one thing at a time. Come on. Let's get you out of here. Come on.

Dean is not saying he won't forgive him. He just need him to be safe. He died and now he's back. He knows they can fix things... But is sad... Because the Leviathans made his entrance right in that moment.

In episode 7x02 Hello Cruel world, Castiel dies.

We had Cas dying in that river... And the scene with Dean taking his trenchcoat. He lost Cas again. This time for real.

He breaks...

And Bobby tries to comfort him, as he will do through the whole season...

DEAN: Okay. So he’s gone.

The sadness in Dean's face is huge.

BOBBY: Well, he was friends with us, wasn’t he? Can’t get much dumber than that.

After this, Sam and Bobby are worried about Dean, and Bobby tries to talk with him, but Dean avoids the topic faking he's ok, as always.

DEAN: (...) I’m not Sam, okay? I keep my marbles in a lead friggin' box. I’m fine. Really.

BOBBY Of course. Yeah. You just lost one of the best friends you ever had, your brother’s in the bell jar, and Purgatory’s most wanted are surfing the sewer lines, but yeah, yeah, I get it. You’re – you're fine.

Then Sam and Bobby sent Dean to a hunt alone, because they knew he needed some distraction. They knew Dean was grieving, in his weird way to grieve.

We will see Dean drinking a lot of alcohol in the nexts episodes as a scape from his thoughts. This Will be very recurrent in this season.

Mirroring Destiel

I'm gonna talk in this last section about two Destiel mirrors in the following episodes to Castiel death.

One was settled in episode 7x03 The Girl Next Door.

If you recall this episode was Sammy's first love when he was a teenager and he was hunting.

But first of all I want to mention some interesting scene, Dean had a fracture after fighting with one of the strongest Leviathans (Edgard) in Bobby's place. His house was burnt and they thought Bobby was dead (foreshadow of it ofc), but when they were in Rufus's cabin, Dean was watching a Latin novel, and Bobby enters and this was the peculiar dialogue...

DEAN Dude... Ricardo.

BOBBY What happened?

DEAN Suicidio.

BOBBY Adiós, ese.

DEAN looks very moved at what has happened on the screen.

Ok, why would I put this here? There was a woman embracing his dead lover in her arms, crying bc he had committed suicide. And Dean was moved about that.

Lovers separation by death of one of them... Suicide specifically, like Leviathan!Cas killing himself in the river... Do you got the picture here?

And btw Sam goes to the groceries shop, Dean asked pie but. .

DEAN Where's the pie?

SAM I got cake. It's close enough, right?

Okay... Dean ate the cake... If we know the cake represents Dean's queerness and hanger for CAS... 😏

Okay, back to Sam again...

He was hunting a Kitsune, but he fell in love with the Kitsune's daughter.

When her mother discover that she tried to kill little Sammy, but the girl stabbed her in the heart. (Hello Destiel recalling).

She rebelled against her mother and her lore for Sam. (Sounds familiar?)

When Dean discovers Sam didn't finish his job again he decides to kill her.

Because he knows how hard is try to kill the person you're in love with, even when that person becomes a monster... He knows.

So he did it instead Sammy. And he lies to him. That will be one of the topics for the whole Wincest subtext (very blantant this season).

Ok... Jumping now to episode 7x05 Shut up Dr. Phil ...

Remember this one, two witches in love, they were a couple for centuries... They were fighting because Maggie Stark (the witch) thought Don Stark (his husband) was cheating on her (misscomunication) and Sam and Dean get in the middle and they decided to interview. And read what Dean said... People... He's talking about his experience with Castiel here...

DEAN:Look – obviously, you two are capable of wiping each other out, right? But you haven't, huh? Which means that you two – you still value whatever it is you got. A-and you want keep that dance going. Maybe it's – maybe it's punishment. Maybe it's – it's sick, messed-up, erotic, kinky, clamps and feathers kind of love.

What-the-hell!!???? I said to myself... Do I need to add something here? He said fighting is sick, messed up erotic/kinky/feathers and love in the same sentence!

Ok Dean... Tell us more... 🤣🤣🤣

This line was juicy...

To Conclude:

Castiel's death was a huge traumatic experience that leads him to depression and alcoholism, but he pushed that down and avoided it as always.

There was two Destiel mirrors in the two following episodes after Castiel's death reflecting their story and Dean's inner truly and repressed feelings for him.

I hope you enjoy this first meta from season 7! C-u in the next Chronicles!

Tagging @weirddorkylittlediana @whyjm @legendary-destiel @a-bit-of-influence @thatwitchydestielfan @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover @lykanyouko @evvvissticante @savannadarkbaby @angelneedshunter @trickster-archangel @dea-stiel @poorreputation @bre95611 @thewolfathedoor @charlottemanchmal @neii3n @deathswaywardson @followyourenergy @dean-is-bi-till-i-die @hekatelilith-blog @avidbkwrm @anarchiana @mishka-the-angel-of-saturday @dickpuncher365 @vampyrosa @foxyroxe-art @authorsararayne @anonymoustitans @mybonsai1976 @love-neve-dies @wildligia @dustythewind @wayward-winchester67 @angelwithashotgunandtrenchcoat @trashblackrainbow @deeutdutdutdoh @destiel-is--endgame @destiel-shipper-11 @larrem88 @charmedbycastiel @ran-savant @little-crazy-misha-minion @samoosetheshipper

@shadows-and-padlocked-hearts @mishtho @dancingtuesdaymorning @nerditoutwithbooks @mikennacac73

If you want to be tagged in this metas just let me know!

Buenos Aires August 21st 2019 8:48 PM

[buffysummers]

Which are your favourite episodes for Buffy and Angel as individuals? Like which one did you watch and say ‘Holy, I love Angel so much and stan till death’ or visa versa?

Oh wow I love this question!! I will do Angel first (and I’m only considering BtVS episodes and not Ats): 1x07 (learn more about him), 2x01, 2x05, 2x07, 3x10, 3x16, 3x18, 4x08, 4x20 (both episodes in season 4 he’s just… really funny lol) and 5x17 (because he’s very supportive of buffy and is there for her… king)

buffy: literally all of the episodes but to narrow down some- 1x12, 2x01 (I know she’s like.. going through some stuff but I love how they show her kind of struggling with this PTSD since it’s definitely understandable), 2x07, 2x10, 2x17, 2x22, 3x12, 3x15, 3x21, 3x22, 4x07, 4x21, 4x22, 5x12, 5x16, 5x17-5x22 (honestly…), 6x22, 7x05, 7x07, 7x10, 7x22. Buffy has so many badass moments too where I’m just like wow I STAN.. but that’s basically like every episode. Queen of the world (honestly)

[jvlewis77]

I'm watching Fear the Walking Dead 7x05 "Till Death"

[avilamarcus]

Acabei de assistir Fear the Walking Dead 7x05 "Till Death"

[karihighman]

The Rookie 7x05 promo photos ©️DGE/ABC.

Bailan angst, Wopez tension, a Chenford moment…. Oh boy! So much is happening next week!! Can’t wait!

[mklopez]

Fear the Walking Dead 7x05 "Till Death" ★★★★★★★★★☆

[pirathotten]

I'm watching Fear the Walking Dead 7x05 "Till Death"

[zelroy]

I'm watching Fear the Walking Dead 7x05 "Till Death"

[writingfireandblood-blog]

Home Part Two

Pairing: Theon Greyjoy x Reader

Request:  i beg you to do something about theon x reader, mb home part 2 or something. it was really great, but my heart still broken after readin so please pretty please do part 2. mb something like theon and reader discuss their feelings, and off course it's not perfect, but it's getting better. or mb like she think about what ramsay do to him "robb surely like to see theon dead, but what ramsay did to him is 100 times worse than death."

Wordcount: 2,105

A/N: Takes place between 7x05 and 7x06

Part One

You were lucky that the dragon mother chose not to press you with questions, though you supposed if she really wanted questions she could go to Jon or Tyrion. You couldn’t help but wonder just how much the Lannister could recall about the two of you from his visit to the north all those years before. A part of you was tempted to ask him, during one of the quieter moments in the castle, but there had been more pressing things on your mind.

Bran and Arya were alive. The two little siblings you had mourned for for so long were alive, safe and well behind winterfell’s walls. The thought made your head spin. After what happened to Rickon and Ramsey’s hands you had convinced yourself that the two of them must have joined the seven heavens, they would have been better for it rather than leaving them to suffer in this cruel realm alone. You had been wrong, if this letter handed to you was to believed, you couldn’t help but wonder what the two of them had been through, something within you knew that it could not have been easy, the fates had stopped being kind to your family long ago. 

You couldn’t help but envy Sansa, the fact that she was there with them, whilst you once more looked like a fool for leaving your family home. Still there was little you could do about it now Jon needed you here his advisor at his side, a true blooded Stark to ensure that the Targaryen queen took him seriously. 

You promised yourself that when this was all over and the night king was but a legend once more the five of you would be together once more. Still there was plenty strings that seemed to be pulling the lot of you apart.

“I’ll go with you,” you voiced. You were a strong fighter, not so good with a sword but quick on your feet and accurate when you tugged on a bow string.

“No,” Jon spoke silencing your idea. “We can not risk you, if I die then you are the rightful ruler of the north... Besides someone needs to keep eye on the dragon glass,” 

“Jon-” You began to complain but Daenerys beat you to it. 

“You can have full reign of the castle while your here my lady, You can hardly blame Lord Snow for not wanting to send his sister into danger,”

“Then let me at least go the wall, I can help Davos or return to our siblings,” You argued, hating the feeling you were simply being brushed aside once more.

“Forgive me my Lady,” Tyrion interrupted “I believe what your brother is trying to say is that he needs someone he can trust here and if you don’t mind me saying, you do have some unfinished business here,”

You were annoyed to say the least, but you bowed your head and said little else, knowing when to chose your battles.

The beach seemed less enchanting the next time you stood upon it, the routine of bidding brother’s goodbye all too fatiguing by now. He was not alone of course, he had Davos for now at least, and Tormund was not about to let your brother face such horrors alone, but your brother’s had almost all died once now, and you could not shake the feeling that this may well be the last time you laid your eyes on Jon once more. You dug your fingernails into the skin of your palm in an attempt to prevent yourself from crying as you watched the boats begin to be pushed out into the water. you had to keep up a calm exterior, you were still after all a wolf in the dragon’s den.

You took a step towards “Be safe Snow,” you told him as you released him from your embrace and pressed a kiss to his temple. “Get back safely, else Arya is going to kill you when we back home,” There was a slight smile that graced his lips at the comment.

“And you Stark,”

With that you nodded towards Ser Davos and Gendry and took a step back, letting Jon say goodbye to the ruler he seemed to like so much, ignore unsettled feeling within you. Jon was not Robb, he would return to your side. You had never had the chance to tell Robb you loved him, you were smuggled out as Roose Bolton plunged his blade into your brother's chest and your Mother's throat was slit. The sound of Greywind's howls filled your mind and you could not help but long for the feeling of your own wolf by your side, or better yet that Jon was taking the snow white ghost with him. You wanted to yell at him, not to leave you like Theon and Robb before him, and yet you said nothing.

You just prayed to the old gods that he got back safely.

It was poetic really, you should have known that the two of you would have found each other once more. The pull between the two of you was just as strong as it ever was, and without Yara there to guide him Theon was as lost as the sea foam that graced the waves he loved so much.

You were aware that you could have gone anywhere you wanted within Dragonstone’s walls, but after the farewell you were not feeling much like keeping company, so you took yourself to the library hoping you might find something useful within its shelves with the aim of then going back to the guest quarters where you had been sleeping. what you had not been anticipating was Theon travelling in the opposite direction.

The two of you collide ungracefully, your eyes too busy scanning over the books that were currently clutched to your chest, you mouth stumbles out an apology before you even moved to see the others face, though really you should have known it was him.

"I'm sorry-" you blurt out before catching sight of brown hair that was so much shorter than you remember. "Theon," you comment the name slipping off your tongue as easy as the oxygen you breath. Honestly you hadn't been able to give too much thought to the Greyjoy's presence in the castle. Once you knew that it would have been all you could think about, you wouldn't even try to count the number of time you had laid awake thinking solely of what your future might have held in store, the number of children you would have, the grin he would have held on his face at the thought of coming home to you. You had as much power to day dream as Sansa, everyone said, when it came to Theon at least. But now you had other things to take up your mind, even the Night's King seemed like a warmer concept than the kraken boy.

"It was my fault," He responded, swiftly as if you were about to reprimand him. Ramsay's work you presumed, shaping Theon till he was no better than a dog.

Gods there wasn't a day that went by that didn't wish that you had been the one to plunge an arrow into that bastard's heart, for Robb, for Sansa, for Rickon, even for Theon. In some ways you felt guilty for him. You had been there when Robb had received a raven about Theon's betrayal, but you had been too occupied by the tears on your face to intervene when Roose suggested his bastard from the dreadfort. You wondered sometimes if you had been the one to ride back north, how much things might have changed. You would have been able to make Theon listen you were sure of it, maybe you would have been able to save Ser Rodrick, Bran and Rickon would have been safe, and Robb wouldn't have been forced to make such stupid decisions. Still Robb's words ran through your mind, your king's anger scarring you. "They'll be no talk, he will die for this," he had vowed in front of you, your mother and everyone present. Still you couldn't help but wonder what Robb would make of all that Theon had been through, in many ways he wasn't even Theon anymore. Then Theon you and Robb had loved, had left after he kissed you goodbye and simply never came back.

You could curse yourself for simply standing there, so you gather what little strength you have and speak. "We both know that I've always been the clumsy one," There is almost sentiment in your voice it takes you by surprise, but then you supposed there was little else you could do.

"A lot of things have changed since then my Lady," he returns, not glancing up at you even then.

You can't take the awkwardness of the interaction for much longer, so you move around him and prepare to continue walking through the hallway.

"Yes I suppose they have,"

You sat in your quarters till the next day, rejecting even the thought of food due to the fear that had taken such a deep root within you. There had been word from Davos that they had reached Eastwatch, but nothing since. You supposed that was a good thing, after all there was no way to send a raven from beyond the wall, but you knew you were unlikely to settle until you were at Jon's side once more, your mind unable to wander any further now. You busied yourself brushing you red locks, organising what few clothes you had been able to bring with you, until your attention was caught by a sound.

"Y/n," You jumped at the sound of Theon's voice and the knock on the closed door that accompanied it.

"Come in,"

The door creeaked open, revealing the Greyjoy's face from behind it.

"What is it Theon?" You asked, trying not to snap as you knew it would make him uncomfortable and might have even scared him away, not that you cared for his presence very much.

"There's been word from Eastwatch, Jon's in trouble, Danyeris is taking the dragons in the hopes that she might be able to help him,"

The gasp that you let out was audible as you felt yourself fall back onto the bed behind you arms drawn protectively around yourself as your hand comes to cover your mouth. This wasn't part of the plan, Jon assured you that he would have been back safely, now it was down to a girl the pair of you barely knew to save your brother.

"This can't be happening," you said more to yourself than Theon, who was awkwardly standing in the doorway gaze set hard onto the floor.

"Theon... What- What if he doesn't make it back," you choke out. Robb, Rickon, you had already lost Jon once you simply couldn't cope with the thought you might lose him once again. It was odd, but it was only then that you realised how Theon must have been thinking over the past few days, all whilst you yourself dismissed the fate of his sister.

The boy in questions took a few slow, calculated steps before finally crouching down in front of you, your Theon would have reached out and taken your hand, and yet this was not your Theon.

"Don't think like that Y/n," he spoke quietly, in a way he would have never before. The old Theon would have joked away your feelings until you were laughing once more, this one was far more serious. "Jon and Robb would want you to be strong for them," Were you in a different mood you would have cursed him for the mention of the dead Stark, but in that moment the sound of your twin's voice was nothing but a comfort.

You scrambled forward with your arm in that moment, taking Theon's hand in your own, in many ways simply to test that he was real, you knew you would be angry at yourself for seeking such comfort later, unsure of what Robb might or might not have thought, despite the fact your brother was long cold in his grave.

Things between you and Theon weren't fixed, perhaps they would never be but in that moment you allowed yourself to draw comfort from the fact that he was there beside you, that one of the boys you loved so dearly had come home to you.

"Your right," you nodded a fire from somewhere within you. "Jon will return unharmed, you'll see and when he does we will save Yara I swear,"