#Behaviour

[ineffectualdemon]

Since the OP made their post unrebloggable (and blocked me. Both actions they are well in with their right to do)

I'm going to make my response it's own post because I think the point is important

-

As someone who is autistic and has BPD and CPTSD and loads of trauma yes you sometimes need to change how you interact with others to keep people around

When I was 13 I hit the few friends I had when I was angry

I had to change that in order to keep those friendships

When I was in my early 20s if I was losing an disagreement with my husband I would threaten to kill myself. My husband told me it hurt him and was cruel and manipulative behaviour, because it was.

So I worked hard to change that to keep my relationship

It's easy to say "I shouldn't have to change for others" and that's true to an extent. You shouldn't change your interests or passions or dim your light. And you should have space to be imperfect and flawed and not have to pretend your ugly bits aren't real. But if something you are doing it causing other people harm you kinda need to change that.

That's called "living in a society"

People adapt to each other and make space for each other in their lives. You adapt to them and they adapt to you

You start being more diligent about throwing away the empty toilet roll because it really bothers them. They start warning you before they run the blender because you hate loud noises

I stopped threatening to kill myself because I was mad I was losing an argument and my husband stopped being so vocally judgemental amount media he personally dislikes

There is a certain type of person who heard the phrase "your emotions are valid" and took that to mean "my emotional reactions and my behaviour are always objectively correct because my emotions are valid and if you have an emotional response or react to what I'm doing negatively then you are wrong and you can't be hurt because my emotions are valid"

And that's a recipe for disaster

Your emotions are valid to feel. They are how you feel and there are reasons you feel the way you do

However, your reactions and behaviour are something you can learn to control and can be irrational

We live in a society and we as people change each other as we interact and that isn't necessarily a bad thing

[todropscience]

KILLER WHALES CRAFT KELP TOOLS FOR SOCIAL GROOMING

In a remarkable discovery, researchers have documented wild Resident killer whale (Orcinus orca ater) manufacturing and using tools in a social context. Observed in the Salish Sea from April to July 2024, members of the endangered southern resident population were seen detaching short lengths of bull kelp (Nereocystis luetkeana) and using them during tactile interactions with a partner, a behavior the authors call allokelping. This behaviour differs from playful kelp draping commonly seen in cetaceans, whales in this study deliberately fashioned kelp segments using their teeth, positioned them between their bodies, and coordinated their movements to roll the kelp across one another’s skin.

This represents a potential case of tool-assisted allogrooming, a behaviour rarely documented in non-primates and never before in marine mammals. Statistical analyses suggest that allokelping may serve both hygienic and affiliative functions, being more common among close kin and individuals of similar age, and possibly linked to skin molting. The whales’ use of their entire bodies, rather than limbs, to manipulate the kelp, and the mutual benefit of the interaction, make this a unique form of tool use in the animal kingdom. If confirmed, it would expand our understanding of cetacean intelligence, culture, and the evolutionary roots of cooperation.

Photo: Orca grasps a bull kelp stalk by the holdfast end and detaches a short stipe segment for use in allokelping.

Reference (Open Access): Weiss et al., 2025. Manufacture and use of allogrooming tools by wild killer whales. Current Biology.

[vaidehi1742]

My math professor unintentionally said something deep. He said that -

“Infinity is not a number, it’s a behaviour that never stops and goes on & on forever”

[j-august]

Lymond's behaviour, as always, went to the limits of polite usage and then hurtled off into space.

Dorothy Dunnett, Queen's Play

[infinite-wanders]

Charles really wanted to be taken to Max's Red Room tonight.

[krumpkin]

I think all decent people have a sense of what wrong or right is but not all of us admit to seeing it 🤔.

[rosstrytobe]

Anyway, maybe we don’t realize how down bad are both Eddie and Buck for each other like:

WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU SHOW YOUR MUSCLES AT GYM, STALK YOUR BEST FRIEND TO GET HIS ATTENTION JUST BECAUSE HE MADE A NEW MALE FRIEND AND MAIM HIM??

WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU BLOW ALL YOUR LIFE WITH YOUR SON AND GREW A PORNSTACHE JUST BECAUSE YOUR BESTIE GOT A BOYFRIEND???

WHAT DO YOU MEAN BUCK'S GONNA SLEEP WITH THE MEN AND THE WOMEN OF LA JUST BECAUSE HIS BESTFRIEND TOLD HIM HE'S GONNA MOVE TO EL PASO WITH HIS SON???

AND WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU STOLE YOUR BESTIE PHONE AND FLIRT WITH HIM AS BABIES IN KINDERGATEN BECAUSE YOU DON’T WANT HIM TO TEXT HIS EX??

[jessi--ac]

Listen, I don't know that they are tracing this line between Tommy and Eddie on purpose in whatever pertains the way they interact and handle Buck as a person independent of romantic or platonic feelings, but it definitely got to a point of almost no return if they are not going to address it. If you literally show a man that we all know has anger and repression issues, almost hitting someone, we were also shown to be his best friend, and we are NOT going to address this for either the character in question or the relationship, I will simply not fucking care about anything this character does or doesn't do from now on. IF they WERE doing this on purpose to have Eddie face his shortcomings, I would embrace the narrative because I think it's a powerful one considering many things, but if not, this is where I will draw my line.

[astrovian]

Richard Armitage Instagram story (24/12/24)

[betadwight]

Work in progress…

Currently working on a Fanart of Mikaela and Sable ❤️

[larimar]

yung_pueblo

[nando161mando]

[actuallyadhd]

Parenting When You Have ADHD

I will be up front on this one: I am not an expert on parenting. I have one child, who is nine years old. I’ve done lots of reading and lots of child care over the years, though, so I hope I can share some good, solid tips that will help us all. Pinnable image branded for Actually ADHD, with a picture of a parent bear and its baby, with the post title in the lower right. Most parenting material…

[unwelcome-ozian]

[thehappyfarmdogs]

This video instantly distressed me. I’m not sure if these dogs both suffer from resource guarding, and are resisting taking the food to avoid attack, or if their training involved positive punishment that they’ve associate with taking the food. Somethings deeply wrong here, and I just can’t fully say what.

(I get the sense the pointer has the main issue, the terrier seems to settle into appease and avoid)