#CLUSTERFORKED

[raincloudkendrick]

— “i wish we had more time together.”

— “oh, time means nothing. jeremy bearimy, baby. we’ll just get through this, and then you and i can chill out in the dot of the “i”, forever.”

[hacash]

one of the joys of tumblr is you get to be friends with people from all around the world and learn more about slices of life you’d never understand otherwise, but today I do wish my moots included a few more Brits because the lack of memes I’m seeing about the absolute implosion of Boris and the Tory party is quite criminal, frankly

[mearcatsreturns]

y’all, I have unwittingly and unwillingly been made part of one of the most awkward social interactions of my life, and I’m in my 30s. I’m going to barricade myself inside my apartment and never leave.

so, I’m hosting a house-warming party this upcoming Friday. I moved a couple months ago, but this is the first week I’ve felt ready and that the week hasn’t been too busy. But it’s supposed to be lowkey, with like...board games and BYOB. I laughingly did the “lol I guess St Patricks day too since it’s so close to that,” but that’s by no means a feature. Nothing will be green or involve proselytizing or snakes. Last Wednesday, I sent out a text to around 20 people or so inviting them, fully expecting that maybe half that would come (I live far from the university, and I know most of them through my grad program). I added a brief addendum to the text because I have a terrible memory and usually leave off at least one person from larger group texts (it’s not intentional, I just genuinely forgot. I’ve forgotten my best friend here, so). You know, something along the lines of “hey, if you see I’ve forgotten someone, you can let them know/let me know and invite them.”

I had in fact forgotten someone, as I learned the next day (actually, I forgot 2--one is my mentee, a very sweet guy who is not relevant to this saga). The person I forgot is Meghan, the president of our graduate student association. She’s in the same year as me, but in spite of me having invited her to stuff in the past and trying to reach out/be friendly, she’s not really responded or done anything social. In fact, she made sure to say in front of a meeting last semester that she didn’t think a casual, open invite to a bar for everyone should be mentioned at the meeting. (She’s also done some queer microagression bullshit, but yeah.) I didn’t forget her on purpose, but I think it’s understandable why she didn’t come to mind as a guest for a house-warming party and chill night in my home.

for some context, my current graduate department BLOWS at coordinating anything social. this is likely partially because of the pandemic and people being out of practice, but the social events that should bond us are just not there. oh, they have them, but they don’t let anyone know until less than a week beforehand, and they’re inevitably at some random person’s house. and no sane person wants to go to a stranger’s house for a halloween or christmas party that only 3 other people attend. they created a social committee, but somehow Meghan is in charge of that too. oh, they also never offer alcohol at student-only events, and who wants to risk getting tipsy around faculty you have to impress for 2-7 years?

so onto the story...

[roominthecastle]

So you get it, right? You liked him, he liked you. You did nice things for each other. Your lack of parental affection did not make you numb to love. Blah, blah, blah. || “Blah, blah, blah?” Why don’t you want me to see this? What are you hiding?

[pekorosu]

@maimakan

thank u for the advice & support <3

[fandomohana]

It's hot, humid, yesterday was a clusterfork, hormones are messed up, nothing tastes quite good enough. I wish I was enough, but who can compete with a ghost.

Gonna eat my breakfast with my two dribbles of milk, cause I couldn't go to the store yesterday like I planned because Mom did a last minute decision to go to a cousins graduation, and the truck doesn't work, and try really hard not to cry.

[gummifish]

How to Launch an Unlaunchable TS3 Game in 2021 (If You’ve Tried EVERYTHING ELSE*)

So you just got a new computer and installed TS3 so you could keep living vicariously through your pixel people in Year Two of a worldwide clusterfork (there is hope!!!) But then the launcher doesn’t work (say what?!)

If you’ve tried everything else (including but not limited to asking EA support, trawling Google, hoping someone on the official forums has the answer and also negotiating with your computer in a firm but soothing voice) don’t give up just yet! This may be the solution to your problems

1) Download this (DirectX End User Runtimes || June 2010)

2) Create a folder on your computer to extract the files into (you can name it whatever you want and, assumedly, put it wherever you want. I put mine in Downloads just so I always have a copy)

3) Find and run  directx_Jun2010_redist.exe it’s gonna ask you where you want to extract everything to. You’re going to extract it to the folder you just made.

4) Scroll down until you find DXSETUP.exe run it, and let it work its old magic on your new computer.

5) Enjoy your game :)!

Seriously, I hope this helps someone, because it worked wonders for me :)!

[wtforkingshirtballs]

Of course, Douglas was lying out of his ass here

[queencarolinemikaelson]

Ice Skating

Klaroline Bingo as hosted by @klaroline-events Prompt // Winter

/

Caroline Forbes was single, and proud.

Being single allowed her to go wherever, whenever, and with whomever she wanted.

She didn’t have to worry about checking in with anyone. She could stay out all weekend if she wanted, and she could stay in whenever she wanted too. She could focus on her career, and herself, and didn’t have to worry about treading on any masculine toes.

There had been a time where she flitted from boyfriend to boyfriend, thinking it was what she needed to be happy. But the older she got, the more she realised she was just happy being with herself, and if the right person came along, she would know.

So yeah, Caroline Forbes was single, and loved it.

But every now and then, as rare as it was, there were days she hated it.

On that particular day, for instance.

It was the day of the whenever-it-works-out friend reunion. A day when Caroline, her entire friend group and their partners got together to have a big, boozy lunch - free from kiddies and responsibilities.

Her friends were dotted around the country by now, so their reunions were rare. This one Caroline had actually organised, seeing as she was the only Chicago local in the group. They had decided on Chicago some months earlier, because some of her friends were coming to Chicago to visit their brother anyway, and it wasn’t much of a stretch for the remaining couples to descend upon the city as well.

Caroline was rightly looking forward to it, it wasn’t often her friends-who-are-parents were able to let loose.

So imagine her displeasure when, she got a harried phone call from one of her friends the morning before the reunion was due to take place.

Because, for some reason, ‘single’ seemed to be friends-who-are-parents language for ‘convenient babysitter’ when they needed time out from their rowdy young ones.

“Please, Caroline,” Elena begged. “The service we hired to mind all the kids cancelled. None of us have been able to go out for months!”

The blaring implication was there; Caroline could hear it in her friend’s plea.

‘Please, Caroline. You can be stuck with children for one day. Going out doesn’t mean as much to you.’

Caroline had been an odd mix of hurt, and – dare she say it – relieved that she was being shouldered out of lunch, because her friends-who-are-parents needed a babysitter.

She was hurt for obvious reasons. Didn’t matter that she wanted to hang with them.  Didn’t matter that she organised the reunion. Didn’t matter that it was her rallying that got them all together. She was the most expendable. Because she was single, she wasn’t a mother; she didn’t need it as much.

But she was relieved because, no matter how much happy she was living her single life, her coupled-off friends usually couldn’t manage to keep their opinions of her singlehood to themselves.

She bitterly rolled her eyes, thinking about how they would like it if she passed comment on their lifestyles with kids, made judgements about their marriages.

“Fine, but you better remember this next time you ask me why I’m still single,” Caroline agreed, haughtily. “And I expect a pretty awesome Christmas present.”

On the morning of the reunion, her small, not-particularly-kid-proof apartment was over run by her five excitable nieces and nephews, and their eight excited-looking parents.

“We can’t thank you enough,” Bonnie gushed, happily, as she stepped through her front door, beginning the slew of compliments for Caroline’s selflessness.

“Care, this is so amazing,” Jeremy said, appreciatively.

“Caroline, you’re a lifesaver,” Elena grinned, gratefully.

“Yeah, barbie, love your work,” Damon quipped, sardonically.

“Care, you truly are the best friend,” Rebekah smiled, thankfully.

“Yeah, Caroline, I know you’ve been looking forward to today as well,” Stefan thanked, profusely.

“We are very much in your debt,” Elijah nodded, graciously.

“I don’t know what all you are on about, Caroline is the reason these things are fun, and you’re making her babysit your kids!” Katherine griped, but threw her friend a relieved smile.

“Not a problem, guys,” Caroline said, with all the grace she could muster. “Now, how are my favourite rugrats!”

The five children chorused their enthusiasm in exuberant cacophony, making all nine adults smile widely at the cuteness.

Before too long, however, eight of the nine adults took their leave, leaving Caroline to wrangle the little ones on her own.

Now, Caroline may not have been a mother, but she knew her way around children.

She babysat her way through high school, then nannied her way through university. Plus, the first baby had been born into the group less than a year after college ended. Plus, Caroline had known all these children since they were born, and just as she was the cool friend in the group, she was the cool aunty.

That experience, coupled with her unrivalled ability to plan the perfect day for any group, Caroline knew the day with the kids would go off without a hitch.

She had every activity planned out, and every item she’d need for each activity in colour coded boxes. She’d only had a day’s lead time, or else she’d have sent each parent a list of things they should pack, to ensure best-day-ever status from the children.

Though, minding all five at once was getting more challenging as the two eldest, Jeremy and Bonnie’s, Rowan, and Elena and Damon’s, Jessamy, were now ten, so endless craft activities didn’t hold the magic it once did.

But never fear, Caroline set up stations for the children to run between, which included every winter activity she could think of; paper snowflake cutting, drawing, Twister, and, the group favourite, gingerbread house decorating.

Each child chipped in making lasagne for lunch, and laughed their way through a team challenge of baking chocolate chip cookies.

They all watched a movie after lunch, munching on their cookies and gingerbread. But by the time 4pm rolled around the kids began to get fidgety, and the lack of a back yard on her apartment suddenly became and issue.

Never fear, however, because Caroline had a contingency for this, as she had for every eventuality.

“All right, kids,” she called, clapping her hands together to get their attention. “Jackets, shoes and socks on, please, we’re going on a special trip. But you have to promise to be extra good okay?”

While the kids eagerly donned their outwear, Caroline quickly shoved snacks, and two thermos’ of hot chocolate into a big bag, before donning her jacket, scarf, hat, and gloves. 

“Let’s go ice skating!”

xxx

“Okay everyone!” Caroline called, as all five kids stood with their feet all clad in skating gear. “Are we excited?”

A squealed response later, Caroline gave them her brightest smile and the green light to take off.

She knew she was taking a bit of a risk with this trip, but she also knew Bonnie and Jeremy took their kids skating often so she wasn’t worried when the two youngest Gilberts, Rowan and Penny, took off immediately. Elena and Damon’s daughter, Jessamy, was a little less confident, but it didn’t take long before she was off after her cousins in a flurry of snow. Stefan and Rebekah’s, Jamie, was also already quite the competent skater, which left Meg, the youngest of the cousins, to tentatively cling to Caroline’s hands as her wobbly skating legs took to the new activity.

But before much longer, even Meg was chasing after her older cousins, just leaving Caroline to grip the railing at the edge of the rink.

“Come on Aunty Care!” Jessamy shouted, excitedly. “You have to skate too! We need six if we want to play this game!”

Caroline felt a wave of trepidation cross over her, she was content staying stationary, thank you very much. She may have been an incredible cheerleader in her day, but that skill did not translate to skating ability. That was a lesson she’d learnt the hard way on her first college date, where she had ended up with concussion and a broken arm as a result.

���Umm, I’m not very good at skating, guys. Can I just watch?”

“No!” came the rousing protestation.

And Caroline, of course, obliged, unable to bear their sad, puppy dog faces for longer than a few moments.

“Fine,” she groaned, cursing herself internally for taking them skating when she knew full well she couldn’t skate.

Caroline shakily put her legs onto the ice, and immediately began to wobble. Rowan and Jamie took her hands encouragingly, and pulled her further onto the ice.

And right as Rowan let go of her hand, Caroline felt a figure zoom past her, too big and too fast to be one of her group, and she cursed the blasted skating trip again, as all hell broke loose.

Caroline’s legs tangled up with Jamie’s and they crashed to the ground. Penny fell onto her knees trying to stop herself crashing into them, leaving Jessamy to crash into her. From there, Meg started to cry seeing all her family in a confusing muddle on the ice, and the Gilbert siblings took it upon themselves to start yelling about whose fault it was.  

Caroline cursed the damn trip a third time, as she contemplated the complete impossibility of scrambling to her feet – because, did she mention, she was terrible at skating – while in the middle of a clusterfork of wailing, potentially injured children.

Then an unfamiliar voice joined the ruckus.

“Do you need a little help, love?”

Caroline froze.

The kids froze.

“Excuse me?” Caroline asked, as she stared at the man who was intruding on quite an embarrassing moment.

He was god-tier-handsome, and Caroline nearly rolled her eyes that this would be the way she met someone who looked like him.

“I asked if you needed a little help, love?” the man repeated. “After all, it’s not everyday a beauty, such as yourself, falls – quite literally – at my feet?”

The flustered Caroline balked at the absolute gall of this man. Sure, he was hot, but ‘a beauty falls at my feet’.

J

E

R

K

That was for sure.

“Now you listen here, buddy –”

She was about to give him a true fairly uncensored piece of her mind, but was cut off when Jamie suddenly cut over top of her.

“Uncle Klaus?

The man’s somewhat smug-and-charming smirk was replaced with a look of confusion.

“Jamie Mikaelson, why are out here all by yourself?”

“But he’s not by himself, Uncle Klaus!” the boy’s cousin cried. “I’m here too!”

“And me!”

“Me too!”

Klaus was suddenly quite squeamish to note every single one of his nieces and nephews were in the pile of small children he had vaguely noted when he stopped to chivalrously aid the blonde beauty who had toppled on the ice.

And he had to admit it was not ideal.

Sure, he loved his family, and fully intended showing up as the cool uncle when they were older – but he was not good with kids at all, and was at a loss with how to proceed.

“Wait, you’re Klaus Mikaelson?” the blonde asked, as she began struggling to her feet.

“That would be me,” he replied, weakly. 

“But why the… why are you… oh my gosh!”

In her attempts to clamber up and talk at the same time, Caroline planted her ass firmly on the ice again with an unceremonious ‘ooof’ – much to the amusement of the little ones surrounding them.

“Yeah yeah, laugh it up,” Caroline grumbled. “Come on, we should try and get up. Why don’t we take a break? I packed some hot chocolate for us to drink.

The kids agreed without too much fuss, the older ones helping the younger ones to their feet and skating to the edge.

“Do you need some help, sweetheart,” Klaus asked, as Caroline still struggled.

“I’m good,” Caroline said stubbornly, proceeding to struggle for another minute.

“Do you need some help?” Klaus asked again, this time with a cool, quirked eyebrow.

She just threw him a disgruntled look, but stuck out her arms for him to take nonetheless.

When she found her balance, she kept her hand squeezed tight to Klaus’ forearm, much to his enjoyment.

In the short skate from the centre of the rink, where the incident occurred, to the edge, Klaus got his kicks by unbalancing Caroline, to provoke the small whinge from her throat, and the tightening on her grip on his arm.

When they made it to blessedly dry land again, Caroline jumped back into babysitter-mode, passing each child a steaming drink and telling them not to stray too far away, before turning her attention back to Klaus.

“Why the hell did you barrel me over on the ice?”

“I did no such thing, love!” he replied indignantly. “You were the one to strayed into my path.”

“That is so not how it happened!” Caroline cried. “Why are you here anyhow, aren’t you some big grouch who hates fun?”

“Is that what they say about me is it,” Klaus said, waspishly. “I’ll have you know, that I am perfectly fun, thank you very much. And I quite enjoy outdoor ice-skating. We did it lots when we were children, and my siblings visiting reminded me of that.”

“How sweet,” Caroline said mockingly, though she noted the slight change in mood, and the wistful look on his face. “Wait, you went skating because you’ll miss them?

Klaus didn’t say anything, but his ears reddened, and she knew she had hit the mark.

“I’m Caroline, by the way,” she said, changing the subject.

“Klaus.”

“I had worked that out.”

“Why are you here, Caroline?” Klaus asked. “Didn’t you organise some great catch-up?”

“Well I did, but the sitter bailed,” Caroline said. “And you know, I’m the only child-free friend, so…”

“I see,” Klaus replied.

“Caroline, can we go back on the ice,” Penny whined.

“Oh, sure thing, sweetie,” Caroline said. “Take care of the little ones though, okay, I’m not going to go out this time.”

“But Aunty Caroline, you gotta,” Jessamy sulked.

“Please Caroline!”

“You have to!”

“I’m so bad at skating,” Caroline implored, for some reason, looking at Klaus, hoping he’d back her up.

“Why doesn’t Uncle Klaus teach you!” Rowan said, ever the pragmatist. “He’s a grown up! Grown ups are good teachers!”

“Well, doesn’t that sound like fun,” Klaus said, that smug-and-charming smirk coming back to his lips in full force.

“Yeah! Then we can have seven players for the game! That will be even better!” Rowan cried. “Come on!” 

With that, the eldest cousin was off, and all the younger ones following closely behind.

“Please, you really don’t have to do this,” Caroline said nervously, even as she got to her feet to follow the children at a slower pace.

“Oh I think I do,” Klaus said. “The children have spoken.”

“But…”

“No buts, Caroline, my nieces and nephews don’t take no for an answer,” he said, then leaned in to whisper almost seductively into her ear. “Neither do I.”

She couldn’t help the tingle that ran through her body at that, nor the wry curl beginning on her lips.

It wasn’t too long before Klaus’ out stretched hand was closing on her own, and he was pulling her onto the ice, teaching her the basics. And less time still before he was settling his hands on her waist behind her to help her ‘keep her balance’.

“You move quickly, don’t you,” she quipped.

“Only when I know I’ve got something worth moving for.”

It was only another ten minutes until the kids found their aunt and uncle, and demanded they join in their complicated skating game. And then just an hour before they were back at her apartment, having skated themselves completely exhausted. And then only thirty minutes before the parents were back.

It was only a few minutes after they all arrived that they found out that Klaus had joined them for skating. And then only a few of seconds before Katherine made a semi-drunk, very-lewd comment about Caroline and Klaus sitting in some sort of plant, doing some sort of natural act together.

And she wasn’t far off the mark, for it was only a day later when Caroline heard from Klaus.

And only the day after that when they went on their first date.

 /

Hope you like! Happy Klaroline bingo!! xoxo

[iracarterart]

but wait, there’s more

And 2020 wasn't an unmitigated clusterfork. I stopped working in mid-January which opened up a lot of free time for other things without rendering me insolvent. I didn't gain back the weight I had been losing. My art-making life took off in a lot of new directions, led in part by involvement with Kelly Schaub and her Collage-Lab. I made a lot more physical objects, whereas I had been working digitally almost exclusively since 2006. This led me to revamp my art workspace and get all my art toys in one place where I could find them. I read a lot of good books, including the Rivers of London series by Bern Aaronowitch and Oliver Sacks' Oaxaca Journal, which led me to read other books in the National Geographic Directions series, which are recommended. I listened to a lot of cool music, including straight ahead jazz on the Solid Smoke label and Scandanavian sludge on the Norwegian Hubro label, the Danish El Paraiso label, and self-published Øresund Space Collective. I grew an unimaginable amount of tomatoes this summer and enjoyed doing so. We were surrounded by the best pair of neighbors you could ever hope to have. I watched some amazing stuff on the Criterion Channel. Things that occurred in the world filled me with some level of hope. Change is in the air my friends, and I hope to embrace it and become the change the world desperately needs. Love to all.

[firstconspirator]

not related to Thomas specifically but a book I read also mentioned the smallpox epidemic in New York and inoculation efforts, specifically in reference to George Washington's apparent invulnerability because he gained immunity to smallpox after spending a month with his dying brother Lawrence. The book unfortunately did not mention Shay Cormac, leading cause of death in the colonies during the Seven Years War.

couple interesting facts I found while researching irl Thomas Hickey:

- He was a member of Knowlton’s Rangers before becoming Washington’s Life Guard and gained the rank of Sergeant (he was demoted posthumously to Private for sedition and treason)

- He was a deserter to the British Army for unknown reasons

- He was technically too short to join the Life Guards but slid by because he was good-humored and well liked by his peers and superiors especially good ol’ George

- Also described as “well-set” by multiple sources which was 18th century slang for ‘handsome and athletic’ and the reason i know this is because 1) context but then 2) I needed to check anyway and the first example given for this slang term is that it was ALSO used to describe Sir William Johnson even well into the end of his life and now I want to scream forever this has nothing to do with Thomas but now that I know this fact you all have to as well 

[star-consultant]

pandemic in the stars?

disclaimer: my expertise is natal charts... but this seems as good a time as any to study mundane astrology (astrology for world events) and to share notes with others

Can you see the deadly COVID-19 crisis in the world’s chart? I believe so. 

Here I’ve rather arbitrarily set today’s world chart to Boston (a city which is in at a crucial moment, especially as on Friday they bizarrely elected to keep school open on Monday before closing them down, so that students and staff can pick up their stuff to bring home... stuff like coronavirus, I guess). But bear in mind that location changes only the house placements. All around the world, the planets remain in the same signs and in the same aspects to each other. ♂︎ = Mars ♃ = Jupiter ♄ = Saturn

Look at Jupiter. It’s the significator of the COVID-19 pandemic. 

“But Jupiter is a lucky planet.” Yeah, it is, and right now it is in a terrible spot. It’s very weak while in its fall in the sign of Capricorn, and it is conjunct Mars, Pluto, and (widely) Saturn. In fact, it’s sandwiched in the middle of these planets. The technical term for this clusterfork is besiegement. 

Jupiter is also the planet of expansion. Since it is in poor condition right now, we are looking at the negative connotation of “expansion”—not prosperity and abundance; instead think recklessness, unsound speculation, cancer... and pandemics. 

A planet is besieged when pinched between Mars and Saturn. Pluto? Traditional astrologers wouldn’t count him (or any the modern planets) at all. Non-traditional astrologers consider all the modern planets malefics to some extent, and of course Pluto (♇) is the biggest baddie of the three. Either way, Jupiter is under attack from both sides. 

As terrible as the situation is, it has the potential to be worse. Currently Jupiter receives some help from positive aspects to the Sun (☉) and to Venus (♀—“the Lesser Benefic”). The sextile to the Sun is particularly interesting. Sextiles reflect positive power, but it does not flow as inevitably as in a trine. It requires action before it gives you any benefit. Jupiter sextiling the Sun, the planet representing authority, depicts how leaders still have power to mitigate the crisis. Unfortunately, the Sun being in the indecisive and unworldly sign of Pisces probably foreshadows how very few authorities seem to be able to act in consistent and courageous ways. 

“OK, but some places have long passed this point of intervention...” Sure, and I’m sure we’re all curious about the same thing, so here’s Wuhan at the end of December: 

First of all, note that at this time Jupiter formed no positive aspects whatsoever. ☹ ️

Traditional astrologers would still consider Jupiter to be under besiegement from Mars and Saturn, as they ignore the presence of Neptune as a barrier between it and Mars. 

Astrologers like myself don’t ignore Neptune (♆), but I don’t consider this configuration all that much better. All three modern planets are... questionable at best, and usually malefics. Neptune in the middle of a shit sandwich like this simply adds a strong element of illusion, deception, or wishful thinking to the misfortune. 

Indeed, given what we know of what went down, Neptune reflects the sheer unknowableness about what was happening as well as China’s active efforts to muzzle whistleblowers and the press. (Now, three months later, we have far more knowledge of what we’re dealing with—although the situation has only gotten worse worldwide, which is reflected in the tighter stranglehold that the malefics now have on Jupiter.)

[goldsleeps]

So I found an old note with a list of my favorite ocs and that's cool and all but

On that list is 'Oliver'

And I don't know who that is or what I wrote the character for or anything about him

And nowhere in my files, Google drive, word, tumblr, NOWHERE is there any reference to Oliver

BUT APPARENTLY

HES MY FOURTH FAVORITE PERSON IVE EVER WRITTEN

[tulipsandlilacs]

GTKM tag game - Magicians edition

I was tagged by two of my best girls @sweetestinthegale and @ohmyohpioneer

name: Giss (Geese). 

when you started watching the Magicians: I think it was late last Spring or early Summer because @sweetestinthegale sold me with there are amazing friendships knowing it’s my absolute jam. And then we dragged @ohmyohpioneer down into the dumpster because suffering alone just isn’t fun. 

favorite season (so far): Season 3. Hands down. Yes and yes. 

favorite female character(s): A solid tie between Margo and Julia. I can’t choose, don’t make me. Don’t even think about it.

favorite male character(s): Quentin. My little floppy-haired mess. (Just gonna leave Sarah’s answer because YES.) But also Penny, ugh how I adore him. And Eliot lost lost little boy who’s v tall, ily too.

if you were a magician, what would be your discipline? (i.e. your specialty,options here). Ideally, healing magic. I want to be a useful unicorn?! I don’t know lol. 

which of the main characters would you best get along with? This is so tough. Maybe Quentin but also Margo because FASHION. Ooh and maybe Julia. Honestly, I don’t know this is tough. I get along with most people as long as you aren’t an a-hole.

which of the main characters do you relate to most? Probably Quentin. 

favorite unlikable character/villain: Marina is/was a villain at one point and I adore her. (Again, going to leave Sarah’s answer because agreed)

favorite pairing(s): Quentin and Eliot (le sobs) // Julia and Penny (40 + 23) I’m

favorite episode(s): The Fillorian Candidate, All that Josh, A Life in a Day, Be the Penny, Escape from the Happy Place.

top 3 fandoms outside magicians: Oof do I even have any nowadays, this blog is such a clusterfork of nonsense. MCU would probably be the biggest fandom I’m “in”. Anything Tveit. Game of Thrones come April. A LOT. I love too manny things. It’s a disaster.

dream job: I would love to write a novel one day. Would love to write for a tv show. (This tag game is just proving that sometimes Sarah and I are the same person.)  Same. But I’d also love to direct someday. Teach. Edit. Direct. SO MUCH. 

what one thing do you wish people knew about you? I get very very excited about things, overdramatic to the core, and v into fashion.

Tagging: @kekela717 @declermontdiana and anyone else who’d like to do it who hasn’t already. 

[loxxxlay]

the painful clusterfork in my head has shifted to my teeth and i’m not loving this. let me be free.

[shirilily]

Okay, people, if you have been around my blog for the last 24 hours, please read this, because it’s time for an apology.

I want to apologize for the negative hell-hole this blog has been ever since the finale. I’m still pissed off, about a bunch of things I have talked about and some that I prefer to keep under wraps. I’m royally pissed off. There are in-universe reasons for that, and also off-universe reasons that, as a writer, make me seethe with anger and contempt.

But I gotta be honest: my expectations weren’t great. I have never truly recovered from the clusterfork that was 5x14 and I suffered- sometimes quite literally- through 5b, which I found, as a whole, pretty underwhelming and kind of gross. I have not talked much about any of this because a) I was purposefully behind in canon till last night as to not be constantly bitter; b) I try to keep my emotions under control and keep this place as much of a positive place as I can.

Last night/part of today, that was an unreacheable goal for me. And I wanted to apologize because... I wanna do better. Full disclosure here: I was in two minds about if I wanted AOS to get renewed or not, because, as I said, this last half season felt poorly crafted and like they were at their wits’ ends and assassinating every character/relationship ever for shock value, and I’m not here for that. But, on the other hand, I wanted the show to be renewed because I have grown to love this fandom to pieces, and though my 15+ years experience in fandom tells me that I’ll move on, I am not ready for that yet. 

I don’t know exactly what is the point of this post; probably, that you, fandom pips, are the best part of my experience regarding this show, and that I am sorry for all the negativity you have been getting from me ever since yersterday. I promise to do better in the future, and to do my part for the year-long hiatus of happy denial in fanworks we have ahead of us.