#Chopsticks parody

[newforever]

https://ift.tt/DZgmBCW 猫踏んで地獄の一丁目からコンニチワ (猫踏んじゃったアレンジ) KURAGASHI Music

[sadceline]

THE ENHYPEN HOST || 14

|| Reverse harem || ft. TXT, Mingyu (Seventeen) & BTS

WARNINGS: foul language, explicit content, group sex, humiliation, sex in public, threesome, foursoome, rough sex, red flags, immoral acts, unprotected sex, morbid jealousy, comedy, parody, possessiveness, violent quarrels, arguments, betrayals, lies, femdom sometimes.

GENRE: +18, reverse harem, comedy, enemy to lovers, friends to lovers

SUMMARY: You moved to Seoul to start over after a bad experience, and everything seems to be going well, you even manage to work for HYBE. You discover, however, that you owe them almost a billion won, money you don't have and don't know how to recover: but don't worry because Hybe itself offers you a solution.

Your body in exchange for paying off your debt.

Do you accept?

TRAILER 1

TRAILER 2

PREVIOUS CHAPTER:

FIRST CHAPTER:

sorry..... I had promised shorter chapters but.... ♡

All the people involved in this matter are legally of age in their own countries.

I am actually surprised at how peacefully the lunch is proceeding.... Although evidently displeased, the boys have taken Niki's decision with great maturity

I'm not saying I expected them to continue, however, I had my doubts that two established, arrogant, wealthy boys would listen to the words of a younger foreign boy.

They may not be as scary as I thought.

I didn't look Riki in the face anymore, really too ashamed.... he found me out. It was also all too obvious that I was looking his huge, veiny, olive cock, which is why he really thinks I want to ride him, which is actually true but strongly wrong.

"Lately Taehyun has been having problems with his throat - Yeonjun says, I, who haven't listened a single second of the conversation between them, staring my plate worriedly, am caught by this information and look the boy, he notices. - It's lucky we're stopped for a while."

Soobin nods worriedly, finishing eating a few slices of sashimi. I stare for several seconds as he sticks his tongue out to accompany the raw fish in his mouth, and it honestly gives me chills. He's so damn hot.

"Sunoo hyung has passed out several times lately." Riki says, before noisily sucking back his ramen.

Really? Why didn't I know that? No... how was I supposed to know? I hardly ever meet him. I turn to him worriedly, furrowing my brow.

"Really? - Yeonjun chuckles. - He doesn't seem like a weak guy."

The japanese man lifts his gaze to his hyung, annoyed. "It's because of these kinds of jokes that he stops eating during promotion periods."

Soobin looks at his bandmate and shakes his head displeased. "Can you not bother someone for ten seconds?"

"What can I do? They draw me like this." The older man justifies himself, laughing and eating.

Riki pours me wine, glares at me, and I snort. "Noona, do you know how much food costs here? Eat."

Honestly, it all looks delicious -- I don't want to give up right away, trying to stay that annoyed, but it's been several days since I've eaten very little and I'm experiencing too much excitement. I pick up my chopsticks and take a nigiri sake.

I can almost see him smiling when I eat the piece and my heart starts beating stupidly, not good. I lower my gaze.

In the end the food was so good that I ate most of it, now I recognize myself... i even drank moderately. I realize I don't exactly look like a lady but there's not much to hide now.

"It was good, wasn't it?" Riki asks me amused.

I look at him, feeling really lost when I see his face, each second getting stranger and harder to handle. "It was good."

"Better korean or japanese cuisine?" Yeonjun asks me.

"Better italian one." I answer.

They giggle, as if they expected such an answer.

I have to go to the bathroom, I get up. There's more drinking, I don't think they'll leave soon.

"Where are you going?" Riki asks me.

"I'm going to the bathroom for a second."

"Then finish drinking, I'm going to pay." Yeonjun announces, getting up.

I swallow upset, the japanese young man notices. "Do you know where it is? Shall I accompany you?"

"I'll ask someone on the staff." I reassure him.

"It's nearby, anyway." The boy replies, pouring himself what's left of the italian wine.

I pick up the bag and Riki doesn't seem to notice, as I'm leaving I hear Soobin say: "Are you that eager to offer?"

To Yeonjun who replies: "I'm the oldest, I should."

I don't know him well but I wouldn't trust his good intentions, he might want to annoy me in private. I speed up, approaching a waiter dressed differently from the others, perhaps a sommelier, of a certain age. He points me to the ladies' room and I rush there, literally.

The first thing I do, spontaneously, is look at my cell phone. There are messages from Heeseung, I immediately open the chat.

There're messages just about 20 minutes apart. Am I wrong, or is Heeseung... clingy? Why am I smiling like a fool? I have to stop fantasizing.

I put down the phone, not knowing what to answer, so I ponder it while I pee. What could I say to him? If I tried to reassure him, I would only end up pleasing him - instead I know very well that I have to stay away from him, that I have to minimize the chances of things getting complicated between us, not only with Heeseung.

I have to watch out for everyone a little bit now.

After washing my hands, I pick up the phone and start staring at him again.

I probably even miss him, but it's not my fault, it's Heeseung who is leading me on.

He.... he's online.

Maybe I'm being a little too direct, but it would still be strange to pretend nothing is wrong and answer him as if all ok. Since I don't think he will answer me in the nearest future, I put the phone away and leave the bathroom. As I suspected...

He stares at me, smiling, I am visibly annoyed. I don't want to talk to him, it's not just because of what he did to me (which I should actually thank him for.... kidding!), as much as it is because he with Heeseung.... no, I have to stop worrying about him.

"Were you expecting me?"

"I don't think so. - I huff, continuing to walk, he follows me laughing. - Shall we leave?"

"Don't run away." He says, grabbing my wrist before I can lower the handle of the private room.

"What do you want?"

"You weren't so obnoxious to me last night."

"I changed my mind." I admit.

Yeonjun smiles again. "What? Did Heeseung talk to you about me?"

"Not at all - I huff, avoiding his gaze. - It's just that you don't seem like a good person."

"Me? I'm a good boy, I even stopped when Niki asked."

"He didn't ask for it, he ordered it."

This time his smile looks annoyed. "Do you think if I wanted to continue, I wouldn't have?"

"Does that sound like what I meant?" I ask irritated as hell, looking at him badly now.

"Yes, it feels like it. - He approaches me, pulling me by the wrist. - Are you implying that I'm afraid of Niki? I stopped because I'm a good bpy - he lowers his voice - I just made you enjoy it."

I push him, suddenly heated. He bursts out laughing but just then we are spotted by the 30-year-old waitress who freaked out on me about Riki. Sighing annoyed, she's looking at me.

"Do you know her?" Yeonjun asks me, looking at her in turn.

I shake my head. "No, let's forget it. Let's go back inside now." I tell him, putting pressure on the wrist he's holding.

"Give me your number."

"What?" I ask surprised.

"I want your number."

"D-Does that sound right? Look I only work for Enhypen. " I'm being funny all of a sudden, but what am I thinking?

"Who talk about work?"

The lady approaches after observing us whispering to each other, and seeing her in front of me I stiffen, Yeonjun spontaneously removes her hand.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to be brusque earlier." She says with an annoyed expression but a sorry tone.

"N-No worries." I reply, but I'm actually still pissed off.

"I thought you were dating Riki - she says, and maybe he told her to call him that, like he told me. I shouldn't feel sad about it but... - I didn't want to be rude. Can you tell Riki that I apologized?"

Yeonjun looks at her surprised and perhaps offended that she is not wagging her tail for him. "And you are?"

"A-Ah - she stiffens, pulling away and taking a long bow before him, - I'm Kim Shinhye. I am glad to know that she is here for you."

"She's here because she's a friend - Yeonjun says, making me startle, I look at him surprised - we having lunch with a friend. Just because she's a girl she has to be with someone?"

I see the waitress smiling with really obvious nervousness. "Is she perhaps famous?"

"No... just everyone knows her." He replies.

That's when the door opens, out comes Riki followed by Soobin, who observe the situation puzzled.

"You again?" Niki asks.

Shinhye lowers his gaze. "Mr. Nishimura.... I was just apologizing. Ask her." She says, pointing at me.

I arch my eyebrows in confusion. "Yes, that's actually true."

"Just leave me the fuck alone, okay?" He tells her bluntly but not brusquely, only in tone.

Honestly I would feel sorry for her if she wasn't a complete bitch. However, even so, I don't understand how Riki could be so insensitive without a second thought.... better not to become his enemy.

"W-Wait...you're misunderstanding- the maid tries to justify herself, grabbing me by the arm and shaking me. - You fucking tell him too!"

"But how old are you? - I ask her, annoyed. - What do you want from Riki?"

She didn't seem to expect such a question; she glares at me, I see her eyes go practically all black. Startled, I try to get her off me but Riki moves her hand away.

"Stop touching her."

I have chills, I really do. "Riki..."

Yeonjun sighs. "All right, so you won't give it to me?"

"What?" Soobin asks interested.

"Alright, then we'll continue the discussion on Instagram." He sighs, walking away.

"What are you two going to do? - The japanese man asks, confused. - Noona I leave you for a second and it ends like this?"

"You are irresistible." Soobin laughs, moving forward and heading for the exit.

Yeonjun laughs and follows him, Riki looks puzzled at me, in front of Shinhye who is watching the whole conversation for some reason, not seeming to remember the existence of pride.

"Shall we go?" I ask uncomfortably, under the girl's eyes.

Riki nods. "Did Yeonjun say something to you? What was he talking about?" He whispers to me.

I let it go and don't tell him, as we wait for the guys who are paying.

At the entrance we say a quick goodbye, Yeonjun winks at me before leaving and I sigh worriedly. Is he really going to look me up on Instagram? But really Yeonjun from TXT? I can't explain it.

With Riki we reach the parking lot, the driver waits leaning against the car and this time he opens the door first to me as Riki makes the rounds to get in alone. I inadvertently look into the man's eyes for a few seconds, then walk in embarrassed... I think I'm blushing. He is really charming.

I don't have time to sit up properly that Niki is all over me. He is really restless and I can't impose myself as he kisses my neck and caresses my hips. Why didn't I expect this? It was so obvious.

"Riki..."

"Noona if you want, you can refuse me. I get more horny." He says, between kisses.

I can't move, I feel cold sweat dripping down my forehead, meanwhile the driver has left. "It's no good, Riki..."

He doesn't care, he has lifted my shirt and uncovered my breasts bouncing before his thirsty eyes. He starts sucking on one of my nipples, and as I keep my hands on his shoulders, I can't help but gasp in pleasure.

He is so young... but his body is so big. Everything about him is... big.

I'm really excited, I'd be lying if I said I didn't want to, but... it still feels wrong. Riki is just a kid, and I in a way don't want to dirty him too.

"I like the smell of your skin." He says, after leaving his saliva on my skin.

He takes off his shirt, looking at me. "Riki..."

"Noona, beg me to stop." He says, crazed, as he sweeps me off again.

I am under him, under his huge chest. He stares at me for a long time without doing anything, then bites his lip.

God, he is so handsome.

"I know you want to fuck me, so just do what I say."

I'm embarrassed as he stares at my breasts, I can't help but cover my face with both hands. "You're a pervert."

He gets on his knees as he pulls off my skirt, I keep my legs closed but he smiles. "Let me get a better look, noona."

He slips between my legs and now I try to cover my intimacy with my hands, I shouldn't feel shy but still I can't help it.

"S-Stop it..." I say under my breath, embarrassed.

Riki turns serious as he stares at me. "Really?"

I don't answer. Why don't I answer? Seeing him smile all of a sudden, I swallow awkwardly.

I told Heeseung that I wouldn't do anything like that with Riki...but then...why don't I push him away? Then again, would it really do any good to humor Heeseung? This excited kid in front of me doesn't seem to demur as he kisses me on the lips this time.

Unexpected.

"Noona, you are so pretty." He whispers as he grabs me by the waist and helps me sit on his lap, his back to me.

"Riki...I don't think...it's okay..."

He moves my hair, gathering it over one shoulder, kissing the nape of my neck; I shiver. "You worry about useless things."

He says this before unbuttoning his jeans, again, I feel him as he pulls out his cock and rests it on my bare back. Fuck, it looks really huge.

"Can you take it all in this position?" He chuckles sadistically.

I'm shaking, but not just from fear. "I-I don't think so... it's too big."

He grabs my knees, forcing me to spread my legs, toward the driver's seat, which faces me from the mirror. "Then you'll have to make an effort."

He thus begins to masturbate me, I am surprised, because he knows exactly how and where to touch me to perfectly stimulate my clitoris. I gasp, clinging to the front seats.

"A-Ah... Riki... in f-front...to him..."

"Don't worry about Mr. Nam." He whispers, biting my earlobe as I grow wetter and wetter.

Instead a little I worry, in fact, I am completely alarmed that I am panting so uncomfortably in front of him. I realize, as Riki lifts me up by my hips and without any warning shoves his huge cock deep into my pussy, that the driver has become aroused - he is evidently hard. I screamed.

Don't ask why I was looking right there.

Riki starts moving my body with authority, slamming his cock moistened by my humors harder and harder inside. Panting behind me, his voice is beautiful....

"A-Ah... R-Riki... G-Gently..."

"Beg me. - He says, sinking his fingers even deeper into my hips as he pushes me so hard it feels like an earthquake inside the car. - You won't do it anyway, you're a whore."

Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck.

Fuck.

My voice comes out erratic but high-pitched as I can't help enjoying the length of him filling me completely. I am so wet that I spurt all over as he simply thrusts more and more brutally into me.

I'm not even sure it all goes in, from the moment he thrusts it in I can't tell. It is as if I am being possessed by a demon that has physically entered my whole body. Since I can touch his legs, when I go back down, I guess it really goes all the way in.

It's unbelievable.

"Ah.... do... slowly... I'm.. I'm..."

"You're so tight, I want to open more you right now." He whispers again, biting my neck and starting to suck in the area where I feel like Heeseung has left his mark.

"Ri...Riki!" I scream, I just can't contain myself, he is using my body like a doll, moving it as he wants, pushing his cock down to my throat while I can only take it.

"You're on the pill, aren't you?" He asks me, focused.

"Y...Yes..."

By dint of watching me, Mr. Nam was about to take the curb. He swerves sharply and I almost hit my head on the window, luckily Riki holds me up with his hand, but then I hear him laughing - all without giving me a second's respite.

"Mr. Nam, you don't want to kill us.... Go ahead and pull over, you should free yourself too."

What? No, wait, isn't this man going to be brought in as well? He's very handsome, sure, I'd really fuck him too, but isn't he a little old? There's still Riki, although now his innocence shouldn't be my priority....

The man nods, and after a few minutes, as I continue to let Riki use me with his cock growing harder and thicker inside me, he changes directions. It is a strangely lonely area, there are a few factories but no residential areas of any kind.

We approach a strange shed, I notice but can't concentrate as Riki continues to fuck me.

We go inside, the lights are all off but after parking, the driver gets out of the car and closes the electronic gate, turning on the lights. I am upset, Riki, on the other hand, is obviously very quiet.

"Now I'm going to fuck you in front of this old pervert, noona." He says, lifting me by the hips and slipping out of me. He grabs my hair, it doesn't hurt but I can tell he wants to dominate me.

"A-Ah... Stop... saying... t-things like that!"

We get out of the car dragging me, when I'm standing up in front of him, I see him throw his tshirt on the ground, then he pushes me against it making me kneel down. "You made Mr. Nam horny...even if he can't touch you, you should make him cum."

He says, as the expressionless man moves closer again.

Riki grabs me by the hair again so that I'm 90 degrees in front of him, practically, at the driver's feet.

Riki pushes his cock back into me, and even though the position has changed, I still feel him dramatically inside. His big balls also slam against my clit, making me enjoy it even more. It is as if they are hitting it.

Mr. Nam wasted no time in pulling his cock of considerable length, but certainly more restrained, starting to masturbate in front of my face.

I don't have to do anything with him, he will just look at me.... Why is it so good for me? Damn.

"Ah..."

"Noona, you really like making men cum, don't you?"

How humiliating, how many humiliations today, but all this only turns me on even more. I'm desperate but I want more and more.... if necessary, maybe I'd even do it with Mr. Nam now.

No, remains lucid Amanda.

"Ah fuck - gasps Riki - should we call Heeseung hyung? This time you won't be able to say... I'm not touching you." He laughs.

Maybe... if I begged him-would he change his mind? "Please... Please... Riki..." My voice is broken, due to his blows.

"He might even jerk off listening to you."

Fuck...if he says these things...no! Let's leave Heeseung out of this!

"I p-pray you..."

"Ah... noona... - sigh tiredly - then you really don't want they to know?"

"N-No..."

"Then you should become my slave." He laughs again, grabbing me by the shoulders and making me stand up while he is still inside me. What a crazy feeling.

Mr. Nam stares at me as he continues to masturbate, his eyes are very cold. Riki starts fucking me again by holding me up by my shoulders, and my breasts bounce in front of the man as the younger kisses my neck and lifting one of my thighs goes in harder.

"Ah!" I shout again.

"I'll keep the secret if you... - seems to freeze and slow down as if he's about to cum -- will let me do anything I want to you."

"R...Riki..."

I don't know what to think; I'm having an orgasm. My voice echoes through the room, below are their masculine breaths of pure pleasure.

"Yes, I will use you whenever I feel like it."

"R...Riki...ah! - I feel like I'm going crazy, he started going hard again. - Don't... I c...c... I can't..."

"Don't piss me off, noona... - He snorts, suddenly abrupt even in his tone of voice. - You enjoy like a bitch and you have...ah.... the nerve to deny it?"

"Mr. Nishimura- the man speaks, sounding like he's about to cum, actually backing away but unable to finish the sentence that his cum splashes against my belly and thighs - fuck...that was not my intention." He curses, surprised at himself.

Riki is equally surprised, as he pulls back but just then I feel him cum inside me. "Oh...fuck...noona..."

I hear him cum for several seconds, as if he really had a lot of it. Then he pulls it out still hard, as his seed slips out of me, I'm about to fall over, I feel my knees go soft, luckily the driver notices and grabs me by the shoulders, even though I see him blatantly looking at my tits, then looking away.

Ah, men.

"Yah! Leave her!" Says, in an almost childlike tone, Riki.

"I apologize." Sighs the man, evidently uncomfortable.

"Sit in the car - the boy tells me, holding me up to sit since the door was already open - do you want some water?"

"Do we have any?" I ask, exhausted.

Riki looks at Mr. Nam, who shakes his head. "Okay, we can buy it."

How cute-no! I have to stop.

Riki hands me a package of tissues. "There's no bathroom here, but we're going home now."

"All right... thanks." I sigh, taking some of them, however I still feel uncomfortable wiping in front of them, Riki notices and coughs.

"Let's not look, okay?" He says, turning around, and the driver does the same.

Ah...why are they all so crazy?

Maybe it's because these are kids who are denied intimacy, what they want is just to get laid and maybe this method can provide for some disorders.... but still, they too would have the right to date whoever they want.

Riki doesn't really seem so bad, though... he's so horny!

I clean up, get dressed, open the door to signal him to come back up, and so in silence we set off home. We don't talk at first, Riki looking at his cell phone, me out the window.

"Are you okay?" He asks me.

I nod in confusion. "What about you? Are you used to these things?" I ask seriously.

He doesn't answer right away but I don't know what his expression is, then I hear him breathing deeply. "To what?"

"The exhibitionism, the humiliation."

He pauses again. "It's the things I usually look at on porn sites."

Ah, I feel like I'm talking to a kid, oh right, he is, more than the others by the way.

"I see."

I hear him snort. "You mean to tell me you didn't like it?"

"I loved it. - I answer coldly. - I feel terrible for this."

"Why do you have to go to all this trouble?"

I suddenly turn away, angry. "Why shouldn't I make them? I never wanted anything like that from you."

Riki tightens his lips annoyed, but his gaze is hurt. "But I do want it, isn't that why you're here? Does it bother you that much or is it really for Heeseung?"

I swallow, why does he keep bringing it up? "I'm not so crazy to think I'm interesting for Heeseung! But even so, I don't want anyone to know about what happened. None of them."

"They already know you've been with everyone else." He replies visibly irritated.

"But not with Riki - I say with tight lips, suddenly sad. He's like a big puppy to me, I don't want that kind of relationship. - Everyone but Riki. Riki is more precious."

Why does he look at me so surprised? What did I say that was special? It breaks my heart to suddenly see him so vulnerable, then he turns around proudly.

"You're making fun of me. It's just that I'm not good, am I?"

"Then you don't believe me? - I raise my voice, but I didn't mean to, so he resumes looking at me, looking hurt, and that upsets me. - I don't want that from you, Riki. You've been harassed, abused, and I know you're getting your revenge now, but please don't stop being the carefree, silly Riki."

I know I shouldn't, but I caress his cheek naturally, and although he jerks back perhaps involuntarily, then returns close to my palm and lets me caress him.

"That happened today...do you really want this? I want to keep being your fan, I want to keep loving you as something precious, unattainable. - I smile, I feel like crying. - I loved you all so much."

"Noona..." He says, confused, as I pull my hand away.

"Also - I try to compose myself, wiping away tears quickly - don't base sex on pornography, it hurts and harmful. Don't treat girls like that Shinhye, even if they are as annoying as she is. I wish you were a good person."

"Noona stop lecturing me." He puts on an adorable pout, crossing his arms over chest.

"I'm not lecturing you."

"We can do it without others knowing."

Really? Is he serious? NO! It doesn't matter!

"Riki! You know I didn't mean that.."

"Do you really want this? Fine." He seems to throw in the towel, and I breathe out relieved, though a little bitter.

"Are you going to hate me for this?"

"I'll have to think about it." He replies with his back to me as he looks out the window.

Really? Was it that simple? Or is he simply testing me to see if sooner or later I will give in? Of course, I was so close.... he really is... I can't explain it in words, but his mere presence by my side makes me feel heated, restless, a fire.

"They haven't always been bad, though - he snorts, after a while, - but some have been very kind to me."

"Sunoo?" I smile softly.

"Yes, he is a kind hyung. Jongseong, too..."

"What about Jake?"

Shit, I ask aloud. He turns and stares at me in silence for several seconds, then snorts. "Not him."

"You two looked close, from the outside." But why am I continuing to talk?

"We look like a lot of things, from the outside."

"I hoped he'd at least been nice to you." I admit embarrassed.

Maybe because deep down I hoped he was a nice person.

Riki twists his lips noisily, back to looking outside. "He was, but then...he turned out to be what he is. That's all."

The way he turns on his cell lets me know that the conversation is over here, he's put a period on it. Maybe that's okay, I certainly can't ask him for the details of the situation.... not yet, clearly.

We get home feeling really exhausted, I want to take a shower but I guess I'll have to wait for Riki since he doesn't have a bathroom in his room. He heads to his room, motioning me to follow him.

"Set up wherever you want." He says, picking up some clothes piled on the bed to move them to the desk chair.

This room is definitely a mess, actually looking like a teenager's room....

"Shall I wait for you to shower?" I ask him.

He takes off his shirt in front of me. "No, you go ahead. You have...a lot to clean up."

Indeed.

I thank him with a nod, then go to Jay's room to get some clothes; he's not back yet thankfully. I don't know who is home right now, but the apartment is very quiet.

As I am about to enter the bathroom a ghost appears behind me, grabbing me by the arm and making me turn around.

Whoever doesn't die... meet again.

"Did you have a good time today? How many times did he fuck you? - He exclaims without turning around, looking at me as if I were dressed like a prostitute. - Do you like fucking children?"

Taken aback, I watch him. Actually he has hardly ever been so scurrilous, so what's wrong with him all of a sudden? He seems nervous but I don't understand why he should be.

"Ew, can you not talk like that? Riki is not a child anyway." Only after I speak do I realize that I have given a very different answer than I had thought.

The moor stares at me for a long time, thinning his gaze in annoyance. "So he fucked you."

Why is he surprised? They all forget why I am in this house. "No, I didn't." I blatantly lie.

"Liar."

"If you don't believe me, it's better so you stay away from me." I reply.

I actually sound swaggering, but I can't even get a good look at his face that my heart rises in my throat. It's just that I keep thinking about Riki's words, his claim that Sunghoon really has interest in me... it's not that I'm deluding myself, it's just that such information is hard to handle, even if it's false.

"As if you really wanted." He sneers, crossing his arms over his chest.

"What do you want S-Sunghoon? Don't you have plans?"

"Cute - he says, sticking a finger in the neckline of my T-shirt to lower it slightly - your clothes." He does it again, like that day in Jay's balcony.

"I don't want to waste any more time - I blurt out, turning away from him, not understanding how he dares to act like this after what happened tonight - have a good evening, Sunghoon."

I go to go inside the bathroom but he grabs me by the wrist, looks at me for several seconds, then his gaze shifts to the hickey that stupid Heeseung left me.

"Tomorrow my shift starts, remember?"

"You're going to say you're not going to fuck me, and then that's the first thing you're going to do?" I provoke him, since he just won't let me go.

"How vulgar, oh my God."

I smile in frustration; that's a wall in front of me, not a human. "Are you done?"

"Sure - smiles the asshole in turn - but first tell me, who did that to you? Heeseung or Riki?"

I swallow, not seeing why I should tell him. "Is that your business?"

"You don't want to answer because it's Riki? You really are the worst - I thought you would at least behave well with him." He has a voice that flaunts superiority, contempt.

"It wasn't him! I told you nothing happened with Riki!" But why do I justify myself to Sunghoon? Why do I do what he wants?

He who had looked away offended, now stares at me again, his eyes serious, perhaps surprised? "Oh, yeah? - I force my arm for him to let go of me, but he tightens his grip. - And tell me, what does Heeseung think about last night?"

What the... What kind of question is that? What does it mean and why does he care? Maybe I got into the middle of a power war, maybe I haven't realized what's going on yet.

"What?"

"You understand very well." He answers seriously.

"No, I didn't understand anything. Last night? What happened last night?" I ask, wanting him to admit it, wanting to hear him say it.

The result, however, is that I see him get so impatient that he lets go of my wrist to grab my face and squeeze my cheeks. "You... you won't tell me? Then I'll have to find out for myself tomorrow."

I swallow rightly frightened, but also very intrigued, lucky I don't have to admit it.... But fine, let him make all the plans he wants - I will refuse, and that's within my rights. If that's not enough, then I'll ask Heeseung for help... though I'm not sure I can really trust him.

I immediately thought of Jay, but by now things have broken down between us and he will obviously no longer be my ally.

"I will refuse."

"We'll see." He chuckles, letting me go and walking away.

He is dressed to go out, meaning he will leave. I watch him disappear down the hall and then sigh, entering the bathroom. I have to send a message to Heeseung, despite everything I've been thinking about it.

im home

He never answered my question and that makes me sigh with sadness, but I put on the music and try not to think about it. I take a long relaxing shower but at one point I feel like I'm going to pass out and hold on to the walls, I almost slipped.

I got terribly dizzy, it would be better to get out as soon as possible. After combing my hair I rinse, cover myself with my robe and sit for several seconds, although I am not thinking about anything precisely.

I feel weak, tired, I guess it's because of the situation.

I am emotionally and physically fragile, but it's best to keep this just between me and myself.

After settling down, I reach Riki's room again, after all, this is where I should be today. He is lying on the bed, in his boxers though, I immediately turn my back on him after entering.

"Noona, are you ashamed?" He asks me amused, getting out of bed and joining me.

I swallow, his voice making me seriously tremble. "The bathroom is free..."

Riki gently grabs me by the face, making me turn around, I shiver. "You look a little pale, noona."

"Really?" I ask.

I actually know I'm not feeling too well, but I don't want to give it away, preferring to wait for him to go wash up and get some rest. He's watching me, looking worried but I don't understand if I should believe him, after all, I'm still a stranger.

Being I here for work, if I were sick I would be a nuisance. Besides, I'm supposed to have my doctor's appointment after tomorrow anyway, so I can get some vitamins or supplements prescribed.

"Shall I order medicine?" He asks me.

I can't speak at the moment, I look at him in silence, he seems so...thoughtful. "N-no, you don't need it! I'll wait to see the doctor so he can tell me what products to take."

"Are you feeling weak? Vitamins don't need a prescription - he sighs, why does he do that? - Sunoo hyung has so many."

"It's ok, really!"

"Explain how you feel."

Oh fuck, Riki, if you do that it will seriously look like you care about me or my health. I sigh, thinking that if nothing had happened today, together (xtomorrow? but reverse) with him and his friends, I'd feel more comfortable now, I'd make less trouble.

But this sort of dissonance between his caring and his sexual urges makes me feel apprehensive.

"It's nothing, I just feel a little weak. It must be fatigue, I haven't slept much."

Riki takes me by the hand, while wearing only his underwear (funny), and helps me sit on his bed. "I'll go wash up, in the meantime I'll call Sunoo hyung. Do you have any pain? Are you feeling dizzy or nauseous?"

"I feel a little dizzy." I confirm.

"Get some rest while I try to figure out what I can salvage."

He says this while wearing sweatpants. I try to look away as I lie on the bed, too tired to feign embarrassment. Riki walks over and looks down at me for a few seconds before placing his palm on my forehead.

"Well, you don't seem to have a fever."

"Like a fever... fever... fever..." I hum, I'm an idiot.

The boy bursts out laughing. "You also have a sense of humor, then you're really okay!"

"I'm fine, I told you. It's strange if you worry for me."

He crosses his arms over his chest. "Why? You said you wanted to be friends."

I arch an eyebrow, feeling strange that he gave any weight to these words. "Really?"

"Friends care."

Ah, it's strange. A man's body, a man's voice, several other manly things..... but I still feel like I'm talking to a kid, and it's the sweetest feeling.

I smile faintly. "Thank you."

I see Riki stiffen and turn away surprised at my words. "So...I'm going. I'll be back in a little while."

I nod tiredly, leaning more comfortably on his pillow. "See you later." I say, before closing my eyes.

I don't think I will sleep, but resting my eyes will help.

I feel Riki leave the room, I stay in his scented sheets, his pillow smells like his hair, it is a very pleasant pungent and masculine fragrance.

Eventually, however, I fall asleep anyway, it is too relaxing.

When I open my eyes it seems to have gotten dark outside, Riki is not in the room and may never have returned. I sit on the bed and stretch, actually sleeping has been really good for me, what a nice feeling.

I look at the nightstand looking for my phone but find a glass of water and some vitamin packets there, a method they use in South Korea but not only, to organize them septically.

I shouldn't trust them too much, they could very well be drugs but it would seem pointless to waste them on me who should be doing everything they tell me anyway.

I smile amused, I don't really mean it after all.

However since I'm better, I don't take them and head out of the room. I hear talking toward the living room, I don't know if I should approach, but in fact I don't know what to do.

I see Jungwon in a tank top sitting on the floor, he is eating together with Jay who immediately notices me, as does the leader.... I was actually looking for Riki.

"Are you okay? Niki said you weren't feeling well." Jungwon asks me, apparently concerned.

Jay has his back to me and goes back to eating, saying nothing, and that creeps me out.

"I was a little tired... that's all." I explain, embarrassed.

"Come, eat with us."

I look at the clock on the wall and note with surprise that I have slept for quite a while, since it is dinner time.

"Ah...don't worry!"

"Are you looking for Riki? - Jay asks me from behind, his voice really cold, he doesn't sound resentful but indifferent, which is worse. - He's gone out, he'll be back in a little while. Did you take your vitamins?"

"No...I don't think they're needed. I'm much better now." I reply, my eyes downcast.

The house is actually very quiet apart from them. I wonder if Heeseung answered, since I left the room without finding the phone.

"Come on don't be shy, sit down." Jungwon smiles, returning to his meal.

I nod shyly and walk over, sitting on the floor (since they are eating on the low table) on the side farthest away from them, I would feel uncomfortable getting too attached. They look like homemade dishes, Jay probably cooked them, look really good.

"Why do you sit so far away, noona?" The younger man asks, grabbing me by the loose T-shirt I'm wearing to get closer to him, as if I don't weigh anything.

I can't believe I've heard him say noona to him, too....

He's really handsome up close, looking fake.

"Where have you been? Have you been paying attention?" Jay asks, picking up some vegetables with his wand and bringing them elegantly to his mouth.

I stay to observe how incredibly ethereal he looks even as he eats. "It was a restaurant."

"You had lunch, just you two? Like a date?" The young leader seems genuinely surprised as he picks up a few bites from each plate in a bowl and places it in front of me.

"No.... there were friends." I say this so softly that the two look at me confused.

"What friends?" Jay is the one speaking.

Should I tell him? I don't want Heeseung to know, and I think it would come out if I said it now, though... what if I lie and everyone finds out? What a figure...

Am I being selfish? I guess so.

"Just... Soobin and Yeonjun."

Jungwon bursts out laughing and choking, Jay puts down his chopsticks visibly irritated. "That brat... Did they do something to you?"

Ouch, that hurts.

Maybe it's because it seems to me that even if everyone knew, they would only worry about their pride, while Jay is probably really worried about me. He knows men in a way that men do not accept.

I look at him silently, smile automatically but it is the most painful smile I have made since I have been in Korea.

"No, don't worry."

"Really?" He asks, not believing me.

Jungwon wipes himself with a napkin, then turns to me. "Yeonjun is a pervert, I know him."

"They were g-gentle, then, this time." I continue to smile but increasingly nervously.

"I just want to remind you that you're not a fan here. - It says rigid Jongseong. - Think of your own safety."

"Seriously, stay away from Yeonjun." Laughs his friend, resuming eating.

I can't help but wonder why I didn't leave when Jay asked me at first. I look at him with a broken heart because really, maybe he... is the only one. But there is also the Jay of this morning who is freaking creepy.

"I like Soobin better, he's more elegant." I reply, noting Jay is actually very stylish too, even in his home clothes.

"I would date Soobin too if I were a girl." Jungwon says, helping me lighten the mood.

"You can do it even if you are a boy." Jay replies, picking up his chopsticks tiredly.

The younger man looks at him. "Oh yeah, that sounds too complicated to me."

"You should do whatever you want."

Yeahm.... when and where do you hear a guy in his position making such speeches? It seems strange to me, though, that Jungwon would react like that since in short...I always thought that among them at least one homosexual had to be, statistically speaking. Not to mention the various applications like bisexuality increasing the percentage.

"What about you hyung? - Jungwon asks, shrugging his shoulders in a cute and silly way. - Would you go out with me with no problem?"

Jay slowly lifts his gaze to his friend, smiles amused. "Anytime, Wonnie."

I see Jungwon blush blatantly and cover his mouth with his hand. "Hyung you are the worst."

"Don't react too cutely." He replies in a deep voice.

Excuse me? I feel both too much and horny, is that normal?

The front door clicks open, contrary to my belief it is neither Riki nor Heeseung but Jaeyun. He takes off his shoes and then lifts his gaze to us.

"I'm home."

"Have you eaten?" Jay asks.

I see the beautiful, enchanting, amazing Jake turn a confused, naive puppy.... like gaze on me. "Where's Riki?"

"I guess he saw some friends for a smoke." Won replies.

I tighten my lips in concern. "Does he do this often?"

"When he doesn't, you should ask." Sighs Jake, sitting next to Jay and watching me for several seconds.

"He'll stop when he goes into burnout." Nods Jungwon.

Jongseong twists his lips. "Don't be so quiet."

"As long as we make him think it's weird, he'll do it out of rebellion. But he can't keep up these rhythms by smoking all the time." Instead, the leader explains very calmly.

"His loss. - He mumbles Jake as he seems to get a better look at me, then rolls his eyes in surprise. - Yah, was it Niki?"

I blink a few times, confused. "Huh?"

"The hickey!" He raises his voice.

Oh right, I had completely forgotten about that! Instinctively I cover the compromised part, then realizing it's no use I sit back composed with my eyes downcast.

"No, he didn't do it."

Silence. A long silence between us.

"Ah, it was Heeseung, huh?" Sighs Jaeyun, who, on the contrary, doesn't seem as bothered.

Is it not that he is jealous of Riki? I'm fantasizing, I evidently read too much BL in my teens.

I am lying, however, because in the shower I saw that Riki chose exactly the place where Heeseung had branded me, covering it with a larger patch.

They all resume eating in silence, Jay being the only one who seems really annoyed, who knows precisely about what. Jake on the contrary seems disappointed, but not angry.

What they all have in common though is that no one is criticizing or attacking me. They... they are the only normal ones?

I eat my first bite of the evening when the front door clicks again. I look up and immediately meet Heeseung's eyes, geez...geez! Is my heart beating? Please, no.

"Yah, you idiot! Don't you have a phone?"

Jungwon arches his eyebrows and turns to the older. "Do you have her number?"

I'm the one he should ask. "Aren't you going to answer it?" Heeseung blatantly ignores him, turning to me.

I spontaneously smile. "What? I don't know where my phone is, I was sleeping."

He huffs as he picks up his phone and has a really annoyed expression, then does something with it but I don't understand what and takes off his shoes, stepping back in.

"Have you eaten?" Jay asks, also to him.

Heeseung shakes his head. "If you haven't prepared extra I'll order takeout."

"No, it's bad for you - sighs the younger one, though he acts like an older brother as he gets up. - I'll just take a second, sit down in the meantime."

Despite everything, he can't help but worry about the health of his members, this really makes him similarly a leader. I can't help but follow him with my eyes as he goes back to the kitchen and Heeseung stands in the side of the table between Jake and me.

"All you do is look at him." Complains my peer, catching my attention.

I look at him, not wanting to but surprised he says it in front of everyone. "It's nice of him to take care of dinner for you."

He gives me a bad look, looking like a shaggy kitten. "The perfect hubby, right?"

"And you, if you were girls, would you date Jongseong?" Jungwon asks.

Jake glares at him. "Do you have to be a girl?"

"So to speak." Mumbles Jungwon, eating his bite.

Heeseung mumbles loudly. "No. I would only date bad boys."

Jaeyun seems to chuckle softly. "Then would you date Sunghoon?"

"W-what? No! I would date me!"

"You're not a bad boy." Jungwon comments.

Heeseung is incredulous and outraged. "What? Would I be a good boy? Me?"

"You're definitely not bad, maybe stupid or superficial." Sighs Jake.

I laugh as I chew, so I cover my mouth. The oldest man in the band looks at me offended. "What makes you laugh?"

"The idea of you dating Sunghoon. - I admit, imagining that it really should be an amazing show. - It's cute."

"I wonder who would be on top." The leader wonders aloud.

Jake stifles laughing. "Stop, please."

"Fucking laughing, of course I'd be on top."

"It's funny because you take it seriously." Jungwon says.

We all burst out laughing, even Heeseung.

Yes, because after all he is happy to have monopolized everyone's attention, this obviously pleases him. I don't understand, I should find this unbearable and creepy but for some reason I feel like I can forgive him, that I want to be understanding.

When Jay returns we resume eating, Heeseung, unlike all the others who seem like true princes as they eat (apart Jaeyun who is not exactly composed but not too disheveled either), gorging himself without dignity and his expression fulfilled by the food is fantastic. He looks genuinely happy; he doesn't usually have this expression.

"Where is Niki?" Heeseung asks with his mouth full, gross.

Jungwon seems to sense a noise before the others. "There he is."

In fact, the door clicks right after his words, and although it creeps me out, what really scares me is seeing Sunghoon when I was expecting Riki.

He first looks at Heeseung, says nothing, then quickly looks at me and ducks down to take off his shoes.

What a strange feeling to be in the same room with both of them.

"Have you eaten Hoon?" Jungwon asks, anticipating Jay who didnʼt seem to want to say anything this time.

"Yes." He answers coldly, then sets off to his room without saying anything else.

When I turn to Heeseung I see him with a stooped look and a confused expression. He has stopped eating and his cheeks are still full, he is really cute, even now, looking like a squirrel. Jake on the contrary eats quietly, but it is obvious that the mere sight of Sunghoon has unnerved him.

Eventually they get to talking about jobs, commitments, the comeback coming up soon that will take them away for a long time, with promotions and touring. I look at them wondering what I will be doing then during that time - but of course I don't have the courage to ask.

"What are we going to do with her?" Jungwon asks, seeming to read my mind.

I look at him in silence. "She's coming with us." Heeseung replies.

"I don't think we can do that." Jay reminds him.

Jake sighs. "Indeed. It's dangerous for her, too."

"We certainly can't leave her here."

Heeseung... everything you say hurts me. You're so good at deluding me, I can tell you've taken a liking to it, but I don't think I'm that strong.

"Why?" Jaeyun asks coldly.

"What?"

"Why can't we leave her here?"

Jongseong coughs, getting up holding his plate. "Put everything in the dishwasher, don't leave a mess."

He looks annoyed. Jungwon looks at him amused, then sighs and rests his chopsticks on his plate, picking up the empty bowls before following his hyung into the kitchen.

Who knows what they will talk about alone.

"Aren't you too involved?" Jake asks suddenly, as Heeseung resumes eating.

"Am I involved? I'm welcoming. I treat her like the others."

The younger man smiles, before taking another bite. "Maybe you're right. - He lift his gaze to me, and I lower it. - Give me your number."

I blink in surprise. "Huh? Sure..."

Heeseung gives him a bad look but says nothing. Telling him the number, he jots it down. When things have gotten really tense, here comes Sunghoon, and this time I'm the one who puts my chopsticks down on the table, sighing.

He sits on the floor, instead of Jungwon, so next to me. I shudder.

"Hadn't you eaten?" Heeseung asks, annoyed to see him take a bowl from under his nose and approach it.

"In fact, I did have dinner. I worry about you, I don't gain weight anyway."

I know he's been willfully being a jerk to his bandmates, and I'm too annoyed to stay so I take my plate and stand up, Heeseung watching me silently but not stopping me, unlike Sunghoon who pulls me from the oversize shirt I'm wearing more like a dress.

He seems to laugh, then barely lifts the fabric, not discovering me but this alarms me and I jerk away.

Fuck.

"Yah, what the fuck are you doing?" Heeseung blurts out.

Sunghoon laughs. "I thought you were wearing shorts. You walk around like that in a house full of men?"

"It's not like they're all like you." I reply boldly, even though I feel like dying.

"There's no need for you to leave just because I'm here. - He tells me, suddenly serious. - And anyway, yes, everyone."

Riki re-enters at that moment, looking dazed, maybe it's true that he's been smoking. He certainly is. He looks at me surprised, then smiles genuinely.

"Are you feeling better?" He asks.

"Are you sick?!" Heeseung and... Sunghoon ask almost alarmed. Is that so?

"Have you finished dinner? Let's go to bed."

It's not exactly bedtime, but what can I do but nod? He puts a hand behind my back and walks me into the kitchen, ignoring all his hyung.

"Sorry, I thought you were sleeping longer."

"Where have you been?"

He looks at me for several seconds, then we walk into the kitchen. "I was with friends."

"Riki, you need to be careful."

"Don't lecture me, I told you." He complains, taking the plate out of my hands to put it in the sink in front of Jongseong, who is sprucing up the cooking area.

Jungwon, sitting at the kitchen table, smiles amusedly. "Riki, will you stop doing drugs? Honestly, do you want to be poor again because of a couple of joints?"

The young boy is surprised but equally amused. "I only smoke with colleagues, if I get exposed they get caught too. Let's be careful, we're all boys and we don't meet girls. Don't be on my case too."

"You're japanese, forget it?" Sighs Jay, concerned.

"But I'm too handsome, koreans are dumb enough to get over it. I also have a dick."

"Don't think koreans are so obvious." Jungwon reminds him, who doesn't seem to be taking the conversation seriously.

"Surely koreans girls are." Riki explains.

He should not talk like that about his korean fangirls, Riki, just as is often the case in Korea, is so prejudiced against them. I look at him worried and disappointed, he notices.

"What?"

"Riki, they love you. You shouldn't disappoint them."

"They want me. They don't care about me."

"Noona, Riki has had bad experiences." Jungwon says smilingly, though his gaze is sharp and serious.

"With adult women, right? - I ask, remembering the time he was assaulted by a saesaeng visibly much older than him at the airport, or the lady who touched him under the guise of frisking him. - Then you shouldn't be dating woman of 30."

He snorts like a kid. "She's twenty-seven."

"But didn't you say you didn't like older girls?" Jay asks curiously.

"I was saying that to reassure the fans and ward off the crazy chicks."

So...isn't it that maybe he took the trauma and made it part of his personality? It's terrible to think that after being molested, he would hang out with adult women (whom he probably mistreats).

"My guess is you're just saying that because Amanda is there." The leader laughs again.

"Even if it is, so what?" He replies, suddenly annoyed by grabbing me by the wrist and dragging me away.

I can see Jay following me with his gaze; I can't help but return it.

"Have you eaten?" I ask him as we walk down the hallway.

He tightens his shoulders. "Yes, don't worry." He says it but doesn't seem convinced.

We are stopped by Heeseung, who seeks my gaze. "Why are you dragging her into the room?"

Riki snorts, approaching me by the wrist. "I'm not dragging her, I'm accompanying her."

"I need to talk to her for a moment." Says the older.

"Try again, you'll have better luck." Riki replies, continuing to walk toward his room with me, but Heeseung grabs him by the shoulder, blocking him abruptly.

"I said I need to talk to her."

I look at him and am stunned, what should we talk about? What else will he have to tell me? It's all part of his strategy, probably.

"I told you not tonight."

Heeseung snorts, incredulous. "What did you have this afternoon? - He ignores him, turning to me - Why were you sick? Do you feel strange?"

Maybe he thinks they are the symptoms of pregnancy, but he would have to be really stupid to believe that since they would never manifest so quickly.

"I'm fine."

"She took the vitamins I gave her, that's why she's fine!" Responds Riki who may not be feeling involved enough in the conversation.

I nod even though it's not true. "Don't worry, you're not serious after all." I tell him.

Heeseung just didn't expect it, he remains silent for several seconds until he hears Riki laughing. "Really? You think that?"

I...I don't know. If you ask me with these hurt eyes, this pitiful look I...I can't.

I stay staring at him this time I wordlessly. Do I really believe that, since I said it out loud? Do I believe Riki more than Heeseung? Maybe so, but then why don't I answer?

"Let's go to sleep."

I lower my gaze. "Ok..." I follow the boy in silence, leaving Heeseung in the middle of the hallway.

My heart hurts, again. He..... looks really sad. Maybe he's pretending, but I'm not, I'm so sad.

ok ATTENTION i have a very unhealthy idea... don't know if you know the sims 4 but there are some very interesting mods of this game that could create funny video material inherent to the story hahahahahha i realize it's so silly but let me know what you think ;) i feed on cringe

do not fear for the fourth shift, because there will be an extra chapter, it will be short promise

NEXT CHAPTER:

--------

immediately after the events of this chapter:

[absolutebl]

Hi ABL! I was wondering if you have recs for bl couples where a younger seme/top aggressively pursues an older, initially-unwilling uke/bottom?

I realized this trope was my absolute JAM when I fell hard and fast for Wei Zhiyuan x Wei Qian, Sun Boxiang x Lu Zhigang, and Yongjie x Xingsi. Bonus points for age gap, stepbrothers trope or the older uke being endlessly indulgent?

I mainly watch China and Taiwan bls, so I’ll love anything from there. I’ll take recs from other countries too, they might become my first foray into non-mandarin bls

I know this is a somewhat specific request so thank you sm if you manage to come up with anything! I really appreciate all the work you put into this blog ☺️💜

Oooo MY FAVORITE!!!

Hyung Romances! (wrap-up post)

I call these hyung romances because that's like noona romances but gay.

Specifically you said:

younger seme aggressively pursues an older initially-unwilling uke

I am utter TRASH for this! YES PLEASE!

Minato’s Laundromat

Japan 2022 GaGa 

AKA Minato Coin Laundry AKA Wash My Heart! AKA Minato Shouji Koin Randorii AKA Minato Shouji Coin Laundry

Younger seme older uke, very clearly yaoi derived dynamic, 10 year age gap. I love this show so much. This is by far the best long running example that really dwells on this trope, Shin is very much the aggressor also very much still a high school kid. Minato is very much NOT. 

Old Fashion Cupcake 

Japan 2022 Viki & GaGa 

Also from Japan, another 10 year gap, and a flipping genius version. This time both parties are older, so there’s less of a stigma around the age gap, but there is stigma about the one being the other’s boss. 

This show had me from the moment they broke the egg yolk with the chopsticks in the opening credits for episode one. It’s about a younger man with a long cherished crush on his boss (ten years older and going through a mid life crisis) who decides to save and seduce said man with pancakes. It’s wholesome, comforting, sexy, and a very necessary narrative about still having hope, interests, and openness to affection at any age. It’s coming of age/queerness packaged in a subtle critique of expectations around masculinity and love and loneliness... and it’s beautiful. Full review. 

Lovely Writer

Thailand 2021 YouTube 

Sib is quite a bit younger than Gene and defines aggressive pursuer. Gene is out of university and established in his career, Sib is still in college.

Thailand criticizes itself and the BL industry while simultaneously giving us classic seme/uke with great chemistry in a one-two punch of “we love it, but are we supposed to? and must we think this hard, yet enjoy it SO MUCH?” This show won’t appeal or make sense to those who don’t already have at least some Thai BL watching experience. What Lovely Writer does, at heart, is reexamine Thai BL has done to queerness, but in a very gentle way that has more to do with Thai BL growing up than any actual queer authenticity. It’s not parody or pastiche, but it is self reflective and trying to correct for some chronic mistakes. Whether it is ultimately successful in this matter is going to depend on the watcher’s relationship to BL and queer identity. But that’s what makes this show beautiful, interesting, and thought provoking. And I, for one, applaud the effort even if I didn’t personally connect to the characters.

Oxygen

Thailand 2020 YouTube 

Thailand’s first real stab at this dynamic as a main couple and it so worked for me. There are many who find this BL too slow and wooden, but I loved it. 

I think of this as a paragon of Thailand’s softer BL style, since Oxygen uses every BL trope in the playbook for one of the gentlest lowest angst BLs ever made. This one showcases how far Thailand is moving BL from its yaoi roots, and is a prime example of the sweet “new BL” model for which Thailand is the main advocate (Korea is liking it a lot these days too, tho). My first watch along. 

SOTUS

Thailand 2016 YouTube 

Guess who started this trope in Thailand? Yeah, sometimes I forget too. But they are not just classic sunshine/tsunder but classic younger/older. Just not by much.

This is the BL that launched a hundred BLs. No literally, it was SOTUS’s international success that pretty much built the Thai BL industry into the juggernaut it is today. People have baggage around SOTUS, I have nostalgia. Trigger warning on bully hazing. Review here. 

En of Love: Tossera 

Thailand 2020 YouTube 

Younger boy wants to court older boy and does and… that’s it. No really that’s the WHOLE STORY. There is actually no angst, drama, or, indeed plot. But are they the softest bois ever to BL as a main couple? Yes they are.

*pulp warning*

Private Lessons

Korea 2020 GaGa 

A BL short from Strongberry that I love, it's age gap and teacher/student (catnip por moi). The chemistry is slightly off though, but stil I do love this one for the dynamic. Certainly worth watching especially if this is your trope since it's like 8 minutes long and very stylish.

MingKit MarkKit

2 Moons (VERY side dish) YouTube 2 Moons 2 YouTube (major side dish) Gen Y (leads) Gen Y 2 (sides again in LTR) 

Thailand’s premier version of this dynamic I just lumped them all into one category. Only in 2 Moons 2 are they played by different actors, otherwise it is all KimCop, and who can complain about that? If you want to watch specifically for this dynamic than go for Gen Y. Trash watch here. 

SIDE DISH CORNER

Not Me (DanYok)

DanYok is an age gap, but it isn’t really the point or the plot of their romantic arc

Don’t Say No (LeonPob) 

Leon and Pob qualify. That’s all I have to say about that. 

HIStory 3: the BL that shall not be named (BoXiang & ZhiGang)

Also appear in HIStory 4: Close to You

The side characters in H3:MODC (and cameos in H4) BoXiang & ZhiGang have a huge age gap, 12 years, and it is a big deal for their relationship. When they start out BoXiang is a desperate himbo high school kid and ZhiGang is a small business owner. BoXiang’s friends tease him more for his lust over such a much older man than for being gay. 

Bonus on this one, there is some very high (and it's Taiwan so) very well done heat. That said, the main couple will, in fact, wreck your psyche for life. Proceed with caution.

THE THAI PULPS

You’re My Sky (SanAei)

Side could (and only good part of this show) SanAei are a classic uni age gap pairing. San is a bit of a spoiled rich kid jock who identifies the older nerd character as HIS and is just like, MINE. That’s MY elder gay. 

Brothers (KhunKaow) 

This is not a good show, but side couple Khun & Kaow are great in it. Khun is in university and Kaow has a small baking business.

Top Secret Together and Love By Chance both have sub plots of high school boys pursuing college ones, but the one didn’t go anywhere and the other went very very bad, so yeah… no. Although I would personally LOVE to see this done well. 

BONUS POINTS ROUND

Stepbrothers trope

HIStory 4: Close to You (sides)

YongJie is quite a bit younger than XingSi, not sure on the specifics but he’s in middle school when XingSi is in high school and still in college when XingSi has his own business.

Addicted has the stepbrothers trope but not the age gap.

Older uke being endlessly indulgent

Future

Thailand 2023 YouTube 

Based on a y-novel by Faddest (En of Love) about an engineering student and a dentist (shocker). This is just a soft sweet cotton candy fluff piece about a younger boy who pursues an older boy and then manufactures silly gay drama. Nothing wrong with that. But I don’t think this style of BL really appeals to a very large market share. Will I rewatch it? Sure. Will anyone else? Nope.

If you want your endlessly indulgent older gay, this is the you crack, they made if for you.

*pulp warning*

Manner of Death

Thailand 2021 WeTV

It’s not really relevant to the story, but Tan is younger. Not only that, he’s Bun’s friends younger brother. Bun is very indulgent, but in a grown up way.

I like MoD a lot but I’m conflicted over it being actual BL. It’s a great gay romantic suspense, although the mystery element is its weakness. MaxTul, the Kings of chemistry, are, of course, perfect and perfectly cast, but their romance thread is more a distraction than an addition. Still, I could watch them make-out the phonebook. Watch along here. 

Seven Days

Japan 2015 grey 

AKA Seven Days: Monday-Thursday AND Seven Days: Friday-Sunday Japan

Seryou kinda counts as the pursuer, but the dynamic is very very weak in this one. Still the way he asks to use Yuzuru’s first name (so CHEEKY) and the way he says “senpai” in SUCH a cute way makes me so happy. And Yuzuru is NOTHING is not indulgent, it kinda defines his character. I mean he just LETS him call him by his FIRST name... right away.

Never doubt my ability to recommend this show. One of the best live action yaois ever made, with perfectly structured angst, fantastic characters and acting, and no problematic tropes (rare in Japanese BL). The leads have excellent chemistry although it’s low heat there’s still some really cute mutual kisses. 

Just Taiwan

HIStory 2: Crossing the Line

2018 Viki 

Seme uke is VERY weak with this one but the younger character is certainly the pursuer. It’s SO GOOD. 

Lin Pei Yu directs this is a sports romance (volleyball) with a good boy/bad boy pairing, and mu favorite of the HIStory franchise. There is no clear seme/uke. Ostensibly it's high school set but Taiwan doesn't care about age appropriate actors. It's a very soft sweet romance with some ridiculously easily overcome conflict. There's great kisses but it's medium heat. The side dishes are the stepbrother trope but they’re very tame, and there’s no other triggers. It's not just my favorite of the franchise, it’s one of my favorite BLs with a perfect happy ending.

Kiseki: Dear to Me

2023 Gaga

The mains are a major age gap, but I always forget because they def don't look it. Also, Taiwan, so very weak seme/uke. Still there is age gap, he's in high school and our gangster is out of college and in the workplace.

The plot is totally ridiculous and slightly unhinged, but that’s normal for Taiwan. It involves all the tropes under a very casual framework of gay mafia gangs + food = love. Absolutely every character is queer. There’s a gum-ball machine of cameos, elder gay rep, great chemistry from all pairs, and a KILLER side couple. As a result Kiseki is a poster child for Taiwanese BL, and I happen to love Taiwanese BL. Bonus? They also managed to END IT WELL, which we cannot expect from Taiwan.

(Triggers for knife play, child abuse, lingering trauma.)

Unknown

2024 YouTube

Unknown is a wonderful BL with a pitch perfect portrayal of long term pining, age gap, and the stepbrothers trope. The acting and chemistry are ON POINT (especially from the leads) which made the resulting characters very believable. When it dwells in intimate family drama, it's stunning. It's slightly less successful when it leaves the home and goes gritty. Still, those are mere quibbles. This is an excellent show, one of Taiwan' s best.

As you see above I mostly had to take you to Japan and Thailand for this one. Considering your preferences try Japan first, it's closer in DNA to Taiwanese stuff, but it won't go as high heat. If you want the heat, you'll need to try the Thai stuff (or the ones from Taiwan you haven't seen). I would start with Lovely Writer.

Okay I think I have given you enough and, unless I miss my guess, I may have tempted you to try some Japanese BL.

Comes to the weirder (and weird hair) side. We have pancakes.

Yeah I think you should watch Old Fashion Cupcake.

EVERYONE SHOULD WATCH OLD FASHION CUPCAKE!!!

(source)

This post dated May 2024, not responsible for hyungs that sling after that date.

[itscontinental]

<-Previous Page<-

Q #1449

Transcribed by @inarticulatedoll:

Excellent question.

It (we) is (are) an interactive work of Choose-your- own-adventure fan-fiction tailored to exist within and expand exclusively upon the canon of timeless sketch-comedy bit; “Continental Breakfast” Originally debuting on the Thirtieth of October in the year of our Lord 2013 in Season 3: Episode 7 of the acclaimed network television programme “Key and Peele” (Keegan Michael Key/Jordan Peele - airing originally on Comedy Central).

It is (we are) entitled, coincidentally:

CONTINENTAL BREAKFAST

Congratulations, It is yours.

Now, with that all cleared up I supposed the only reasonable thing for you to do is purchase with money Season 3: Episode 7 of landmark-series: “Key and Peel” and watch the absolutely classic sketch by the name of “Continental Breakfast” along with the remainder of the episode just for good measure, thus being able to recognise all key components of this brief canonical expansion and via identification be able to understand this little parody in a way that is both comprehensive and satisfactory to all parties involved— namely myself, yourself, and CONTINENTAL BREAKFAST.

It’s okay,

I’ll wait...

a. Okay, yes, I will use money to buy Episode 7, Season 3 of smash-hit “Key and Peel” and then, having seen the entirety of the episode in addition to Iconic sketch “Continental Breakfast”, will return in a prompt if not reasonable frame of time.

b. Not on your life, buster; I take orders from no man and nary a narrator. Not a dub be it disney and their ensemble efforts or the lord who makes no effort to sync with all (which is ALL) that she steps on with myriad glamour’s (all on-point although no noise at all)- nope, not even when they Jerk off Christian Bale do I do dubs because the Japanese is ALWAYS better.

Well, yes, that is how I break my chopsticks... is there some kind of point to that question?

... Anyway: you’re not my boss, you’re not my father, and you’re NOT GOD (whose dubs, if i haven't mentioned, are pure fucking silent shit)

However,

It just so happens that I’ve been meaning for the past twelve years to use cash, credit or debit to buy S3:E7 (2013) of Time-Honoured Sketch Comedy Programme Key and Peele that I may watch it and laugh at its jokes which are all very funny.

But don’t get it twisted: I’m rolling my own way, tony. Not takin no cues from you. You se: Way it happened was late October of 2013 I experienced nothing short of a spiritual crisis surrounding islamophobia within the Buddhist community following the Myanmar Incident (I, myself, happen to be a Buddhist--Yeah--Bet you couldn’t tell from the clothes--Well, don’t judge a book by its cover, huh--Although, I will admit it is in-part to temper my RAGE… to age my temper… and to centre my wild side) so on thirtieth of October I was so busy contemplating Buddhism and my wild side that i failed to tune in to my absolute favourite and then-groundbreaking show: “Key and Peele” on what was then my fiftieth channel.

So you got lucky in this one, it's on the house considering I was already planning if not mid- purchasing the Seventh Episode of the third season of critically lauded Sketch-comedy program “Key and Peele” while reading this garbage in the first place. A purchase, might I add, perhaps to your own comfort, that with be followed by an immediate consu- mption by which i will inevitably watch historically gur-wrenching sketch: “Continental Breakfast” and proceed to return in whichever frame of time the wolf inside me deems appropriate—and he's busy right now,

fighting the other wolf.

c. I have not seen the 7th episode of the 3rd season of revolutionarily acclaimed Comedy-Central programme “KEY & PEELE” nor do i intend to. I hate bald boys. I can’t stand bald boys. can you just summarise it briefly for me?

[seoul-bros]

Jikook Week 43 Complete (01/10-08/10/2024)

Their 43rd week in the military is now complete. It's time to celebrate with a look back at this week in 2013.

It was the Rookie King era and Episode 5 was released on the 01/10. It's the first time I've watched one of these and it's brilliant entertainment. Look at RM here, so cuttttteeeeeee!

Nearly an hour of chaos including parodies of SK television, bowling competitions (hyung line against maknae line), behind the scenes of the recording of Beautiful, Jimin breaking chopsticks with his butt.

Yeah you heard that right. They were game for anything and everything in the early days. Jimin and J-Hope bore the brunt of humiliation in this episode with amazing good grace and there was definitely and unspoken agreement that they would shield and protect their maknae as much as they could.

The behind the scenes of the recording of Beautiful included a conversation between crew members about which of the four would be the most successful with the ladies. The final vote was a draw between J-Hope, V and Jimin but the guy who had the casting vote chose Jimin to break the tie. Look at how happy he is here. BTS's official Casanova 😂😁🤣😂😁🤣

JK was asked what he did to impress. As usual he was honest and to the point, I have no game he said while looking across the table at the other Busan prince. Hmmm are you sure JK?

The MV of their Beautiful cover with lyrics by RM has Hobi, Jimin, Tae and JK trying to impress a girl they meet at the mall but let's face it, not just JK, none of them have game. I mean what is Tae trying to achieve here?🤔Is this where the bear emoji comes from?

It's also disconcerting that they are looking at the camera more than at the girl. Eye contact guys that's flirting 101.

No wonder she rejects them all and walks off disgusted at the end.

Still I don't think JK looks that disappointed as he hangs off his best bud here at the end.

Eeeekkkkk BTS production value sure did improve over the years.

It was O!RUL8,2? era. The mini album was released on the 11th September 2013 with the MV for the title track N.O and this week BTS were promoting the song on the major music shows....

....including MCountdown on 03/10, Music Bank on 04/10 and Music Core on 05/10. Look at them just starting out!

Post Date: 07/10/2024

[hils79]

Hils Watches Snowfall - Ep 3

Like I know these two are probably going to turn out to be brothers, but if they're going to get all up in each other's spaces like this and have charged conversations what am I supposed to do? Not ship them?

OMG Winwin is dancing with Chuchu. I have got to learn their character names in this 😂

These two are so cute together. I do worry Winwin is going to die before the end though.

Okay, is this turning into an X-Files episode?

The wigs in this drama are so bad. Also, I really hope she gets out of this abusive household soon. I know it's supposed to be hard to watch, but it really is.

Can't decide if this random new servant is just there to give us an outsider perspective of the vampire house or if he's going to turn out to be someone significant

Haha! I've just noticed he's wearing a bat pin on his jacket. This clearly isn't a parody vampire drama or anything but parts of it are a little tongue in cheek

Fuuuuuck! He just broke the dude's arm and then stabbed him in the leg with a chopstick. I mean to be fair the other dude is evil but wow.

I have to say this isn't going the way I expected at all

"I don't kill people I just fuck them up a bit."

I need to remember that his name is Weilian not Weilan (the name for the Shen Wei/Zhao Yunlan ship for those of you who haven't seen Guardian)

I wonder how long it's going to be before someone figures out the whole vampire thing

I was confused why Winwin looks so small next to this dude because I've never thought of him as particularly short. That's because he's apparently the tallest member of WayV and is surrounded by shorties

[benk625-blog]

Tomorrow I will run my 2nd game of the 2nd season of my Exalted Essence/Lunars campaign. Below is a monologue I wrote for an NPC.

Tea with the Green Lady, Chosen of Jupiter, Head of the Convention on the Dead

Your host is garbed in dark green mourning attire, the shoulders have been rent open as if torn by grief. A black veil obscures the finer details of her visible face. Her skin is pale, raven colored hair is done up in a bun that is held in place by emerald studded, ivory chopsticks. Her wine red lips are pressed together so as to not betray any emotion. The Green Lady bids you to sit with a gesture and pours the tea herself. There is no one else in the room to attend the ceremony despite her high status. 

You drink in silence. The tea is a blend that is both familiar and mysterious. The smell and taste makes you ponder things that are best unspoken, memories that you have not shared with another soul come to mind. The Chosen of Jupiter consults the leaves at the bottom of her mug, frowning slightly.

She speaks:

In ancient times, before the gods, before Creation itself all was Chaos and Void. All or nothing. Riotous potentialities screaming defiance at nothingness itself. Out of the Chaos came the titans, primordial beings that gave shape to the chaos surrounding them. Time, Space, Matter and Energy were their playthings. 

One of these Ancients was Gaia. She was composed of the 5 terrestrial elements: Air, Earth, Fire, Water and Wood. The others of her kind combined their genius with hers and formed Creation as we know it. To aid Gaia in running and maintaining Creation the Ancients made the gods. The gods were given dominion over the world and they dwelt on the Blessed Isle. Limits were placed on those spirits. A great geas prevented them from raising arms against their masters.

In time the gods began to resent the Ancients. Cruel and capricious, they destroyed vast swaths of Creation in fits of pique. Incarna, the most powerful of the gods, began to plot a revolution. In secret they were aided by Gaia and The Maker. Taking some of their Essence, the Maker forged the Exalted Shards. These shards fused with the souls of heroic mortals Exalting them above all others.

The Exalted made war against the Ancient Enemies of the Gods and cast them out of the heavenly city of Yu-Shan. Those that surrendered became the demonic Yozi and they were imprisoned in the body of their god-king Malfeas. Those that fell dead in battle became something else entirely.

Before the Divine Revolution the souls of dead mortals would travel to River Lethe to have their memories washed away. Then the Wheel of Reincarnation would transport the refreshed souls back to the Loom of Fate to be woven back into the Tapestry to live again. Ancients had souls far too complicated for the Wheel and broke it. That which had never been born could not truly die.

These broken, dead monstrosities drifted toward the Void. They sleep walked towards Oblivion, hoping to stop the ceaseless nightmares of betrayal, humiliation and violent defeat. Nothingness eluded them. They could not let go of Creation too much of their power and will was invested in the living world. To achieve their nihilistic goal, all of Creation had to die with them. But they could not do it themselves. Defeat imposed an unshakable somnolent state. All they could do was mumble blasphemies in their phantasmagoric torpor.

The Exalted and the Maker repaired the Wheel of Reincarnation, but it would never be the same. Dead souls washed along the shores of Lethe without being cleansed. Like the Neverborn they could not return to the living world, nor could they let it go. The dreams of the dead titans mingled with the memories of mortals and took shape as The Underworld. This hellscape was a dark and twisted parody of Creation. 

Most mortal souls did their best to recreate the world they left behind and created new petty rivalries and hierarchies among their fellow dead. Others heard the Whispers of Oblivion and began to worship the sleeping titans found in the lowest levels of the Underworld. Madness and boons were given to these twice damned dead. These priests of nothingness carved labyrinthine paths to Oblivion from which there is no escape.

The theology of the Neverborn is built upon a contradictory pair of goals: all must succumb to Oblivion; Creation must die so that the Neverborn may be embraced by Oblivion as well. Weak souls succumb to the Whispers and cast themselves into the ultimate end. The stronger ones are able to resist the call of the void and plot the death of all life. The tension of choosing continued existence in opposition to holy unbeing drives most of them mad.

There is a very select few that have amassed incredible power, the Deathlords. In the last few years Deathlords have crafted a new weapon in their crusade against living; Deathknights. These warriors appear to be connected to the recently released Solar Exalted.

This is the result of centuries of research. Much of it I have collected or supervised those who gathered it. You are being extended the honor of assisting me in this endeavor. You will pass on to me what you learn on Darkmist Isle regarding the Deathknights.

[propertyofkylar]

sad lonely pathetic (SLP) anon again, with a silly anime rec that’s very dear to me: ‘Cute High Earth Defense Club LOVE’ is a parody on the magical girl/boy trope, with a mysterious creature from outer space using a corpse as a puppet to communicate with his chosen ‘warriors of love’ (idk if that term’s actually used, haven’t seen it in years), not that it can’t speak to them directly, but he looks like a wombat and he doesn’t wanna draw too much attention ig

the antagonists also have a creature from outer space on their side, a green hedgehog of hate with a rlly deep voice

it’s silly and ridiculous and i genuinely started to love it without even noticing it. there are 2 seasons, sadly i never finished the second one. maybe i’ll do that sometime soon..

i distinctly remember an episode where a guy was turned into a hateful monster bc of just how fed up he was with breaking chopsticks unevenly

hiii bestie!! yayayay more anime!!

oooo this looks fun. ty! i have to check it out...and the other ones u have recommended...im so bad at doing anything that isnt just. rotting in bed ig

[bluemoonperegrine]

2023 Tumblr Top 10

Hat tip to @grabyoursaintsandpray for the link to this JetBlackCode page that generated the list.

Nine out of my ten are memes. 😂

#1 4,273 notes May 18 2023 If you want something to go a little viral, post a meme about suffering for medical procedures featuring Star Trek characters.

#2 391 notes Jul 10 2023 Star Wars and bad puns also make good memes.

#3 232 notes Aug 15 2023 A meme that's a mashup of ST:TOS and ST:SNW

#4 166 notes Jul 5 2023 More Star Trek! 😂 This meme crosses a TOS movie with Frasier.

#5 127 notes May 13 2023 You guessed it: more Star Trek, but also more Frasier. Yay!

#6 121 notes Jun 9 2023 Finally Werewolf by Night gets some love. This was my very first WBN meme. Don't ask me how many I've made since then.

#7 91 notes Aug 2 2023 Somehow the Star Wars returned... with Oscar Issac, Cheetos, and chopsticks.

#8 77 notes Aug 18 2023 Yay, more of my WBN memes! These feature Jack being an adorable idiot.

#9 73 notes Jun 24 2023 D&D, my beloved! Here's a brilliant parody of "The Sound of Silence."

#10 66 notes Apr 19 2023 Lastly, a wholesome meme about memes.

[the-unnecessary-commentary]

Having half formed memories of this series I watched on YouTube forever ago about this friend group running around to mess with Chinese ghost legends and vividly remembered the scene where they had like offered the ghosts food but they had to tap their bowls with chopsticks or they would Probably Die and then a bowl shattered so they started sharing bowls until they all shattered and then a guy started tapping his top and bottom teeth out of desperation before they all just ran away

It was like part parody and part played straight

I'm pretty sure the end was sad tho

[sailor-cerise]

[ID: screenshot of a parody news article, labelled "Better Version" across the top.

[Headline] Writing about U.S. Food the Way The New York Times Covers Asian Fruit [End headline.] In a nation torn by racial conflict, one unlikely food unites. To those accustomed to chopsticks, the greasy parcel known as a 'burger', a sort of split bao, is crude and messy. Yet it encapsulates a nation's violent past. By Soon-Tzu Speechley [Banner image of a photo of a burger with lots of toppings.]

/end ID.]

the way that white travel & food writers write about 'aswaq is so eyes-rolling-into-the-back-of-your-head stupid

[ask-paradox-and-friends]

Here we go. New battle.

Saito/Rayoma vs Hanayama!

Battle of Yakuaza!

Hanayama info:

Height:6 foot 3

Weight:366lbs

Strengths:as one of Baki's closest friends and his big brother figure he's one of the strongest fighters around and is a feared yakuza leader. Extreme Strength (matched Pickles grip and push Strength. Pickle has fought Dinosaurs and means he's on par with a Triceratops. Can easily rip the flesh off of people with pinches and can crush bones with ease by squeezing too hard. He flipped cars and crushed cars in early Baki. Has overpowered people who can punch easily damage metal and stone with punches. At 14 could smash trough stone walls.) Extreme durability (can easily shrug off bullets and most firearms dosent work on him. Has endured 10 slashes intended to kill from Musashi [yes that Musashi] could get punched by Pickle and Musashi says he has extraordinary durability.) Hypersonic speed (can dodge and react to bullets while injured and can outrun a speeding car while injured by having bullets in his torso. Could see Katsumi's Mach speed punch even though he couldn't dodge it.) High intelligence (Despite only being 19 he's a skilled fighter and is capable of leading the yakuzs effectively) Skilled in street fighting and what seems to be Sumo?

Weaknesses:rather slow in the context of the Baki crew. His code of honor can bite him in the ass (never falter or fall in a battle as it will mean death). He charges into everything head-on with absolutely no care. Fights with no weapons or armor at all. Seems to struggle against skilled and faster fighters. The stomach seems to be a weak spot.

Saito/Rayoma/Kiryu information:

Height:6 foot

Weight:195lbs

Weapons:Oni-maru, Golden gun, special ammo (enhanced acid poison thunder fire and flashbang rounds) anything they can get their hands on.

Strengths:As an Einherjar made to be a parody of both Fate and Yakuza, they're one of humanity's best fighters. Borderline superhuman strength (can casually send men and tigers with punches. Threw and overpowered bulls at full charge overpowered their rival/brother Goro/Okita as Okita he cut his way through a British black ship and as Goro he punched kiryu through a floor hard enough to shake the multi story hotel the duo were in. Can casually pick up and throw one ton statues. Has broken stone statues with ease and can be compared to people who have lifted and broken boulders. Can get stronger using BEAST style) Superhuman durability (Can become invulnerable using heat and the LEGAND style can easily withstand car bombs along with RPGs withstood hours of torture with ease should scale to Goro who withstood his eye getting shot out. And quote 'the most painful torture a man can give without killing them' for a year.) Hypersonic speed (easily can block react to deflect and cut through bullets. Has caught bullets and knives without seeing them and threw them back hard enough to kill people. Can use RUSH style to go faster) high fighting skills (mixed BRAWLER LEGAND RUSH and BEAST fighting style into their iconic DRAGON style which is their default. Fought the world's greatest assassins on more then one occasion and has been able to pick on skills and learn very quickly. Can use damn near anything in a fight. Styles seems to be a mix of street fighting boxing judo Krav magrav and wrestling. Can catch punches with chopsticks and has broken men's fingers with them.) Genius intelligence (Goro says they're always ten steps ahead of foes and his a tactical genius also very charismatic and skilled at leading the yakuza for years despite their optimistic view of said yakuza.) Skilled in gun and sword fighting. Somehow can manifest Arua/Spirit/Heat to heal and make a spirit dragon to further boost stats and use fire/lighting.

Weaknesses:Völundr is outside help and won't be allowed. Despite being skilled in gunfighting isn't very fond of fire arms and prefers Swords and fists in a fight. Code of honor and morality can get in the way (Despite fighting damn near everyone they don't like needless fighting or killing.) Stronger move requires heat to use which is only gotten through doing damage to opponents. Died in both lives (isshen and modern) from their own bad habits (Liver failure and Lymphoma both from heavy drinking) according to the newer RPG titles they're weak to the cold.

[fancoloredglasses]

Lancelot Link, Secret Chimp (Get Smart! gone ape-shit)

[All images are owned by Sandler-Burns-Marmer Productions. Please don’t sue me or do…whatever you did to make those chimps “talk”]

[Thanks to mitzmandave]

Now, I’m not saying Lancelot Link, Secret Chimp owes its existence to Get Smart!. However, the show premiered on ABC (the network that aired Get Smart!’s final season) the year after Get Smart! was cancelled. Additionally, two of the show’s creators were writers on Get Smart!

But enough speculation and conspiracy theory, on with the review!

Lancelot Link, Secret Chimp was a 1970 Saturday morning comedy TV show modeled after spy thrillers, but the characters were all chimpanzees in costumes. According to lore, the chimps walked around on the sets gibbering away while the actors on-set (with only a vague screenplay to let them know what was supposed to be happening) ad-libbed the lines to (somewhat) coincide with the chimps’ lip movements.

The voice cast consisted of three actors:

Dayton Allen, who did a number of cartoon voices but was best known as a cast member of The Steve Allen Show in the 50s, voiced the title character as well as half of the male characters.

Bernie Kopell, who was fresh off from his stint as Siegfried in Get Smart! (hmmm…) voiced the main villain as well as the other half of the male characters.

Joan Gerber, who was a voice actress (one of which was Freddie the Flute in H.R. Puffenstuf) voiced all of the female characters.

 The stories revolved around two factions:

The first is the heroic Agency to Prevent Evil (A.P.E.)

A.P.E.’s top agent is Lancelot Link (who sounds a bit like Humphrey Bogart) who, when not battling evil, works undercover as…

…the lead singer in a psychedelic rock band known as the Evolution Revolution (hey, if Austin Powers can moonlight as a world-renowned fashion photographer…)

Lance’s partner is Mata Hairi (an obvious parody of the notorious spy Mata Hari)

The head of A.P.E. is Commander Darwin (the joke here should be obvious)

On the other side, we have the Criminal Headquarters for Underworld Master Plan (CHUMP)

…led by the evil Baron von Butcher (who sounded exactly like Siegfried from Get Smart!, mainly due to his being voiced by Kopell)

His driver and chief minion is Creto (a play on “cretin” and a parody of the Green Hornet’s partner Kato)

The other member of CHUMP most often seen is the Duchess

Other members of CHUMP are…

Ali Assa Seen (whose last name is a play on “assassin”)

Dr. Strangemind (a parody of Dr. Strangelove), CHUMP’s resident Mad Scientist who sounds a bit like Bela Lugosi

The Dragon Lady

…and Wang Fu

Surprisingly neither Wang Fu, the Dragon Woman, nor Ali Assa Seen were played very racist (especially for the 60s!), though Assa Seen lived in the desert and rode a camel and Dragon Woman was often using an abacus (I would also remark on Wang Fu often eating with chopsticks if it wasn’t for the fact that the chimp playing him actually ate with the damn things!)

Like Get Smart!, the show played the genre for laughs (as if having everyone being portrayed by chimpanzees wasn’t enough of a clue). But unlike its predecessor, there’s no way the plots could ever be played straight!

Between adventures (or in the middle if it was an adventure that lasted the entire episode), the show aired a song by the Evolution Revolution, introduced by talk show host Ed Simeon (who spoke like legendary variety show host Ed Sullivan)

The series lasted one season (since it was a Saturday morning series), but ran in reruns for a second.

As always, if anyone would like to see an episode reviewed, let me know!

[pinknipszz]

what do you think itadori and sukuna’s conversations are like? funny or not i need to eat your thoughts like a tiger

i wanna eat YOU up like a tiger 😛😛😛 okay but this one was SO fun to do like ugh. i was kinda stressing before realizing that yuji is literally jst a high school boy who’s stuck with a man as old as fucking rocks. so i kinda had to channel my inner nine-year-old boy humor. thank u for being my day 1, ilysm bae!! <;33

AVERAGE OFF-SCREEN INTERACTIONS

⤷ ryomen sukuna and itadori yuji (this is NOT a ship post)

YUJI probably says ‘“that’s what she said” or “yo mama” jokes in between sukuna’s yapping. now, yuji can be a very patient and righteous person. he’s willing to eat as many nasty wax fingers as possible and go through an entire execution afterwards if it means saving japan from total annihilation. however, things he can’t stand are sukuna’s endless monologues over some ancient shit he couldn’t care less about. yuji is just a teen with a lot (of wax fingers) on his plate. he needs to cope somehow. 

SUKUNA probably spits in yuji’s food while he’s eating. considering the state of him right now, it’s like. the only thing he can do. yuji’s eating a sandwich? sukuna takes a little bite before spitting all over it. yuji’s eating a delicious bowl of noodles? there’s a mouth on his palm that’s drooling all over his chopsticks. it’s literally so fucking disgusting but sukuna does NOT care. if he’s gonna be stuck with the most insufferable fifteen-year-old boy on the planet, he might as well make the experience unbearable for him too.

YUJI probably listens to the worst songs in the world. and it’s not like “corporate commercial ABCDEFU- and your mom” kind of music (although he does sprinkle that in every once in a while), but more like “cg5/living tombstone gaming parody” music. and it drives sukuna insane. he swears he’s never heard of anything so grating, so intolerable, so abhorrent. it irritates him so much that yuji will take every opportunity to listen to it. sukuna is just his BIGGEST OPP. besides, it’s not yuji’s fault that sukuna can’t comprehend the nuances of fnaf lore.

SUKUNA probably whispers the wrong answers during a test. okay. prior to reawakening the king of curses, yuji’s academic performance was mediocre at best. but now he appreciates even the most mundane classes because they feel like the last bit of normalcy in his life. but sukuna ruins that for him too. he always whispers “are you sure about that one?” and “that’s not how i would’ve done it”  and “you’re fucking stupid” to completely throw him off his game. and it works.

(masterlist)

[mia-japanese-korean]

Cat and Mouse, Unknown Japanese, first half 18th century, Minneapolis Institute of Art: Japanese and Korean Art

The Japanese have long delighted in the idea of animals parodying human actions. In this painting, the cat daintily offers a hot pepper with his chopsticks, knowing that it will make the foolish mouse gulp his sake. Oblivious of danger, the mouse tips the red and black cup to his lips. In the foreground stands a double gourd, used to decant the strong rice wine that is the cause of the mouse's reckless abandon and, ultimately, the cat's good fortune. The inscriptions reinforce the moralistic theme of the work: disaster awaits those who forget themselves and drink too much: More than just deceived, [the mouse] gleefully dances, and then is caught The mind that does not heed danger causes the body to be caught Unwittingly befriended by the cat who plies him with sake the mouse drinks, slurp, slurp Those who imitate the sages' teachings will eventually ruin others' lives. Size: 16 3/8 x 10 15/16in. (41.6 x 27.8cm) Medium: Hanging scroll; ink and color on paper

https://collections.artsmia.org/art/32411/

[rubiatreewrites]

🍀Masterlist🍀

Fandoms:

Original Works

BTS (band)

Picka: 30 Days To Love (Otome Game)

TXT (band)

Strangers From Hell (drama series)

Miscellaneous (see end of post)

Platforms:

AO3

Wattpad

🌻Original Works

I Became The Villainous Princess But Now Every Hot Man Is Obsessed With Me

Status: Updating

Genre: Parody, Isekai, Transmigration, Fantasy, Friendship, Eventual Romance

Chapter(s): 2/?

Summary: Here's the short version: I was dying.

The long version? FedEx had better take down its slogan because I'm pretty sure it wasn't time for me to be lying on the cold gravel at 24 years old. Now they got me an express ticket to the ICU. The ICU for about 5 fucking minutes, because one moment I felt bones stabbing my lungs, and the next moment I'm being cradled by some woman that smells like milk powder.

So yes, I was dead. Now I'm a baby. That only means one thing.

FedEx has gotten me isekaied.

🌻BTS

Hybrids: The Blood Of Two (BTS/OC)

Status: Semi-hiatus

Genre: Fantasy, Dystopia, Coming of Age, Eventual Romance

Chapter(s): 31/?

Word count: 96K+

Summary: In a world turned upside down, blood is everything, and it separates the living into three: The so-called pure Humans, the detested Myths and the ones caught between both – The Hybrids.

When 16 year old Shin Ae gets whisked away from their orphanage in a van together with a group of kids on a perfectly fine summer day to be adopted, what she didn't expect was to be sent into a place called The Sanctuary, or to be bonded with eight other individuals destined to be her kismets- lifelong comrades chosen by Fate itself.

or

In a world where blood purity reigns, a bunch of hybrid teenagers from different backgrounds eventually find solace in each other.

Cinnamon Cariad (Platonic Spiderman Jungkook & Ironman Seokjin)

Status: Updating

Genre: Alternate Universe, Fluff, Familial Bonds, Friendship, Platonic Love, Hurt/Comfort, Coming of Age

Chapter(s): 12/?

Word count: 8.3K+

Summary: Jimin props his chin on the flat end of his chopsticks thoughtfully. “ So as far as the world knows, he doesn’t have a son?’

“ As far as the world knows,” Jungkook looks down at the desk, the letters Jeon Jung Kook mocking him from the horrendously ugly cover of his Biology workbook “He’s the country’s most eligible bachelor.”

or

In which being an illegitimate child and Spiderman can oftentimes bring unwarranted attention (and responsibilities)

🌻Picka: 30 Days To Love

the taste of coffee (ever-sweet) - cha euntae/ ha yeonwoo

also on Wattpad

Status: Completed, One-shot

Genre: Romance, Fluff

Chapter(s): 1/1

Word count: 180

Summary: He’s not one to fall fast, and definitely never the one to fall first. But when he sees Yeonwoo in-person at the cafe for the first time, as vibrant and sunny as her photos, he just can’t seem to look away.

crush culture (has my head in the clouds) - cha euntae/ ha yeonwoo

also on Wattpad

Status: Completed, One-shot

Genre: Romance, Fluff

Chapter(s): 1/1

Word count: 883

Summary: Cha Euntae goes on a tteokbokki date with Lia, but there’s a certain webnovel writer who’s living in his head rent-free.

all my divine blessings (led me to you) - cha euntae/ ha yeonwoo

also on Wattpad

Status: Updating

Genre: Romance, Fluff

Chapter(s): 1/3

Word count: 879++

Summary: A vignette of Euntae and Yeonwoo's married life

🌻TXT

do you daydream of déjà vu? (platonic yeonjun/soobin)

Status: Completed

Genre: Coming of age, Angst, Friendship

Trigger Warnings: Death, Mental health issues, Unhealthy coping mechanisms, Maladaptive daydreaming

Chapter(s): 2/2

Word count: 5.4K

Summary: And when the silence doesn't grace him - it rarely does- Yeonjun closes his eyes and lets himself dream. At the very least, things are better when the reins are in his hands. Different from the ones that breathe into his ears at night, where there is only complete darkness with the taste of sand on his lips and Soobin's name thrown forth from brittle lungs.

It's the daydreams that kept him sane.

or

Sometimes the only way to cope is to (day)dream

🌻Strangers From Hell

In The End ( It’s Him and I ) - Seo Moonjo / Yoon Jongwoo

Status: Completed

Genre: Whump, Implied Gore

Trigger Warnings: Mental Health Issues, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Mild Gore

Chapter(s): 1/1

Word count: 244

Summary: “You are my greatest masterpiece”

Strange Birds - Seo Moonjo / Yoon Jongwoo

Status: Completed

Genre: Whump, Toxic Codependence

Trigger Warnings: Implied Sexual Content, Attempted NonCon, Mental Health Issues, Mild Gore

Chapter(s): 2/2

Word count: 353

Summary: You’ve always loved the strange birds.

or

Strangers From Hell told from Moonjo’s POV.

🌻Miscellaneous Fandoms

Flower of Evil (drama series) Squid Game (drama series) Seobok (film) The Smile Has Left Your Eyes (drama series)