#Designate a driver
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biggest-gaudiest-patronuses · 2 months ago
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hero/villain showdown but one of them has a spontaneous medical emergency and the battle gets put on hold while their archnemesis drives them to Urgent Care
#it should be like. a hernia. or diverticulitis#something intestinal for maximum Awkward Scenario#and the entire car ride alternates between awkward silence and the driver lecturing their nemesis on the importance of regular check-ups#this is funnier if the hero is the one having the hernia tbh. but both options are Very Good#want to emphasize that it is a 'medical emergency ' that is clearly not extreme enough for the emergency room#and the sidekick/henchperson gets stuck in traffic so the hero/villain stays for moral support#they spend 8 hours in the waiting room playing Uno (it devolves into a screaming match)#at the end of the ordeal one of them vows to burn the hospital to the ground with their laser eye powers#and it's Not The One You Think#oh oh oh! ALTERNATIVELY:#it's an allergic reaction; one of them accidentally poisoned the other by using like. soybean derivative in a tranquilizer dart#emphasis on *accidentally*. yes they were technically fighting but That Wasn't Supposed To Happen#so now they're obligated to take responsibility and Stay In The Waiting Room#(can't decide if it's funnier if it's the hero or the villain stuck in this situation)#(probably the villain)#“why didn't you TELL me you were allergic to soybeans???”#“um because you would use it against me in combat?”#“as opposed to NOT telling me! which has worked out fantastic for you!!!”#villain being genuinely offended bc they have a biochemistry degree and have invented literally dozens of untraceable poisons#they have the scientific skill to poison their favorite jackass in hundreds of ways#(and have done so before! in admittedly non-fatal outcomes but that was by design okay)#but it's “dangerous” to do them the simple curtesy of informing them about a SOY ALLERGY????#above all else they consider themself a scientist#and they're LIVID that their favorite (reluctant) test subject lied about their medical history#“technically i didn't LIE--#“I read you the questionnaire! the very first time i held u hostage i READ YOU THE QUESTIONNAIRE!!!”#“...the what now”#“the MEDI--holy shit you weren't even paying attention were you#i had you bound and gagged over an ACTUAL BUBBLING ACID PIT and you couldn't even be bothered to--#“--so i was obviously a bit BUSY at that moment! I'm sorry i ignored your VILLAINOUS MONOLOGUING while the BLOOD WAS RUSHING TO MY HEAD but
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aucrowne · 14 days ago
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(っ- ‸ - ς) Poor Nirei, having a nightmare
--- based on this week's episode end credits ⸜(。˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡
➺ More windbreaker fanart
➺ More Furin Trio
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libertynstyle · 1 year ago
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hyacinthsdiamonds · 8 months ago
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A lot of you underestimate how prevalent British bias is not only in F1 but across sports generally, and even in other industries.
Max saying he has the wrong passport in the paddock is an accurate statement. Do you think he, Seb, or Michael would've been half as vilified by the British media if they had a British passport instead? Would Fernando? Do you think Yuki would get half as much shit about his radio "conduct" if he was British? Because it's the British commentators who consistently have issues with it, and say shit like it's "unbecoming" for a driver to speak that way, ignoring that 1 it's not his first language and 2 IT WAS ENGLISH PEOPLE HE LEARNT THAT LANGUAGE FROM. Sometimes people misspeak, but Yuki has always taken accountability and apologised if he has and if he caused harm. Martin Brundle did not get nearly as much backlash from the media when he misspoke and called an Asian driver a slur while commentating. He also never apologised for it.
Alex, one of the four Brits on the grid but who drives under the Thai flag, has said that the commentators only call him British born when he does well. He was completely excluded from the Silverstone publicity about the home crowd heroes, whereas George, Lewis & Lando were heralded, not only on race weekend, but for weeks leading up to it.
Alex's statement also reminded me of this Richard Harris quote, "When I'm in trouble, I'm an Irishman. When I turn in a good performance, I'm an Englishman." Genuinely, if I took a shot every time a British organisation/person claimed a talented Irish person was actually a Brit, I'd have died from alcohol poisoning years ago.
Hell, I see George wearing the poppy pin this weekend in the lead up to remembrance Sunday. Do you know the amount of shit James McClean gets every year because he refuses to wear one? And he has very valid reasons for choosing not to wear it, yet he's torn to shreds every year by not only random people on the Internet or on the streets but by commentators and the media too.
Because of how this sport became mainstream and because no one challenged Bernie Eccleston's monopoly on broadcasting rights back in the day (people were given the opportunity to buy a share of the broadcasting rights; the idiots said no), this sport has prioritised the British voice/perspective for decades. I know the other broadcasts are just as biased for their home team/drivers, but the British one is the biggest one, as it's the main broadcast for better and more often for the worst. It's the broadcast with the most reach and influence. Their bias has to be challenged eventually if this sport ever hopes to properly expand and grow. The British bias is so difficult to miss once you start noticing it.
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heavenbarnes · 1 year ago
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craving drunk simon. like at the bar with the rest of the team an hes glued to readers hip, showering her in compliments. all lovey n shit idk maybe im jus crazy💗
oh the concept of it really bringing older bf!simon out of his shell- too lush to even THINK about.
he’s perched on a stool and you’re stood between his legs, arms wrapped around you and his face buried in your neck. undoubtedly he’s whispering the craziest stuff.
“mmm, can’t wait t’get y’home”
“maybe y’can just rub on it a little? nobody’s watching”
except everybody is watching, johnny’s hazy eyes are watching you both from across the table and you’re not sure who’s more hot and bothered- him or simon.
or if you’re at the pool table and price is trying to teach you how to play but every time you bend over to shoot, you’ve got gaz practically barking.
and that’s not even to mention the fact simon presses into you from behind as you try to line up.
it’s all silly and heated and you don’t mind a minute of it (so what if attention feels nice?) because it means simon is unequivocally himself.
he’s got his hands all over you, pulling you into his chest, and running off at the mouth.
“y’so fuckin’ beautiful, make me the luckiest man alive”
“all these gits wanna’ take y’home? but it’s this stupid git that’s doin’ it”
when you get him out in the night air to begin the trek home, you know it’s the drink talking but you KNOW it’s actually him talking.
“might fuck around n’marry you, yeah?”
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is-this-fascism · 11 months ago
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we KNOW distracted driving is dangerous and deadly. so why are advertisements such as billboards and flashing lights and wiggly wavy dudes legal
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arcadebroke · 4 months ago
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krumpkin · 2 months ago
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Porsche 911 GT3 😁
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gourmet-soda-pop · 1 month ago
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the 'draw your comfort characters as this' idea is really funny actually-
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this oneeee ^^^
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feketeribizli · 4 months ago
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oscar from real life but yuri. yes 🙂‍↕️
OSCAR FROM REAL LIFE BUT YURI!!!!
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padiduys · 3 months ago
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Some older WDC plus uhhhhh Mark
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cinamun · 6 months ago
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Can't believe what would become the epic and neverending saga Things Fall Apart™ started with these two, 8 years ago, when they met in San Myshuno.
As Mr. & Mrs. Drake bring in the New Year at the tippy top of San MyShuno where it all began, I'm wishing you all a prosperous 2025.
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kaiserouo · 1 year ago
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Well someone has to give it its driver updates, Gabriel
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valyrfia · 3 days ago
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they’re designing the 2026 car around lewis with a strong rear/weaker front end. kill me now. charles get out of there.
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spicyboelives · 3 months ago
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Realistically, I think I’d have to introduce myself as increasingly stupid things so folks wouldn’t cotton-on to us being ,,,,just some guys… yk?
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himbo-in-limbo · 2 months ago
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Magma sesh Ena edition!! Also if your Ena oc is on this comment so I can tag y’all!! Y’all’s ocs we’re so cute 😭❤️❤️❤️
Also first time drawing the taxi driver (also dratula and Alex) 😳❤️ I ship taxi man with my Ena oc….
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